All Comments on 'The Claiming'

I quite liked it. It would be a bit easier to read if you didn't start a new paragraph mid-sentence but apart from that it flows along at a nice pace. Keep writing please :)

...but the formatting really takes away from your story. While people are telling you to get an editor, I'm not seeing that as the issue. I think you'd be OK if you were pasting from a text editor instead of Word (or whatever it is you're pasting from).

I liked it it does need work but you got your ideas across. It was good not counting the mistakes. Have it look over but please finish the story do not stop like many others do when they reach a obstacle in their path. Good Luck!!!!!

I enjoyed the story. Even the best writers have editors to help them. I would love to see you continue their story. I'd like to hear about their journey to his homeland and their lives there. I hope you'll consider doing that. I think it was a very passionate and enjoyable piece. thanks.