All Comments on 'The First Night'

Don't embed dialogue in paragraphs of narrative. It buries the dialogue. A good rule of thumb is to start a new paragraph when a character starts talking.

That happened way too quickly. Seemed playful at first but it just seemed like Cait and Tom went straight to fucking like they didn't care if it could be considered cheating. Still a good premise though. Just needed some more build up and maybe a bit more action.

Good story. I can see my wife and I doing that with the right couple.