The Girl

I sat alone on the stagecoach feeling a little sorry for myself. My father had announced out of nowhere that I had to go live with my Aunt in Montana. He pulled me out of school, away from Ray Stockton, the boy who had been sparking me and packed me up to take care of my Aunt Ruby. An Aunt I had never heard of until he got a letter from her saying she needed me to come help.

He wouldn't even let me read the letter, just told me to stay on the stagecoach all the way to Billings and a driver would pick me up there. My Aunt's driver, a man named Jack, would pick me up.

The ride had been long and boring and even worse, it was getting colder and colder the further north we went and I didn't have a coat or anything to keep me warm.

I had heard a lot about Billings, and from the talk I had expected something... more. It was just as dirty and unkempt as back home and it also seemed smaller somehow. I climbed out of the coach and looked around as the driver handed me my single bag. Hugging myself, I stepped off the road and up against the livery, trying to get out of the wind.

I didn't see a driver anywhere, or anyone looking for me. I had no idea what to do. I didn't have a penny to my name, I had brought a kerchief with bread and apples with me to eat for my meals and they had run out yesterday morning. I had no clue what to do now. Just stand here in the cold and hope someone showed up eventually?

"Did you just get off the coach?" an older woman asked kindly, hurrying up to me with a shawl to wrap around me.

"Yes! Thank you so much!" I said, grateful for the shawl and the arm she put around my shoulder. "I was supposed to be picked up here?"

"Well the coach is early, you come sit inside and sit by the fire!" the woman said, pulling me into a nearby house. She sat me down in a chair and put a blanket over my lap before going to the stove and stirring something in a pot. "My name is Myrna, but folks around here just call me Mama Banks. What's your name, child?"

"Elizabeth, but my family calls me Lizzie. Is it always so cold up here?"

"Oh, child! This is nothing yet! Fall is just on us! So what is a girl your age doing riding alone on the stagecoach? And with no coat!"

"I am older than I look, eighteen in fact. Most girls my age are married off by now, but I was waitin' on my Ray to get the house built out on his land. He asked my pa and he told him as soon as he was done with it, but my Aunt wrote. I have to come take care of her so Ray will have to wait a little longer."

"Oh? Your Aunt is here in Billings?"

"Close, I guess. Her driver should be coming for me. How early was the coach?"

"A good hour, they must have made good time with one passenger as light as you. Here, eat some of this. My stew will warm you good! And here's some tea. What's your Aunts name?"

"Ruby. Ruby Miller since she was my Ma's kin. Thank you!"

"Don't know a Ruby. She may be further north. Coaches don't go much further north this time a year, Here. I will open this curtain so you can keep an eye on the livery, see if anyone comes along."

"Thank you, for everything. You are incredibly kind."

"Oh, don't you mention it girl. Seen a small thing like you out there so cold and lost, what sort of person would I be if I didn't help? I ask you that now. You are just a tiny thing, aren't you? But as I look at ya, you are all of 18, aren't you? Your man'll be happy to get you back home. There now, who is that? Oh, just Jack Ellison in for his supplies I reckon."

I looked out the window at the man who had stopped in front of the livery, looking around from the wagon seat. He was looking for someone.

"Papa said the driver's name was Jack?" I said, half standing.

"Is that so? Jack Ellison is no one's driver that I know, but he does live up further north. Maybe he is picking you up for someone he knows? He does seem to be looking for someone though, doesn't he? I reckon that's you. Let me walk you over," she said, taking my arm and leading me out the door after hefting the blanket over her other arm.

"Jack! Jack Ellison!" she called, making the man turn and scowl at her. His scowl shifted to me as he looked me up and down, then his face turned furious. "You s'posed to give this girl a ride up to Ruby Miller's place?"

The man stood and dropped down to the ground, looking down at me angrily. "Letter said it was a woman coming, not a child!"

"I'm eighteen!" I said fearfully, trying to step back from the imposing and dangerous looking man. He was slightly less than middle aged, tall and well muscled. A man who worked hard.

"Jack Ellison! This girl has come a long way to care for her Aunt! There's no call to be rude or sour to her!"

The man's face went from angry to cool as he looked at Mama Banks. "I was told she would be a woman," he said more evenly. "I expected someone... larger. More able to... handle the things that would need to be taken care of. This... girl will hardly be able to lift a sack of grain, let alone help her aunt move around."

"I am more capable than I look!" I said angrily. "And I can lift more than you might think as well! I helped on the farm just as much as my brothers did!"

"All the cooking and cleaning?" he asked in a demanding tone.

"All of it! After mama died six years passed, I was all there was to do it. To help with anything till the boys got big enough. Even then, I did the lions share of the huntin' and gardening while they did the other outdoor stuff. I know what I am about and I am just as capable as anyone to take care of my aunt and her house!"

"Fine," the man snapped. "Myrna, thanks for taking her in till I got here."

"Weren't nothing Jack. Here, she aint got a coat. She can have that old shawl, I like my new one better and she can have that blanket too."

"I'll pay you for them," Jack said, shoving his hand into a pocket and pulling out bills. More money than I had ever seen in one place.

"None of that Jack Ellison! You take your money and get on out of here! Get that girl home to her aunt and out of the cold!"

Jack grunted sourly and turned to me. "See that general store?"

"Yessir."

"My name is Jack. Go over there and I will pull around. You know the runnin' of a house, you know what it takes to feed three people through fall, winter and spring?"

"Yeah, mostly. What does she have on hand, do you know? Chickens? Pigs? Anything?"

"Chickens, goats, pigs, two dairy cows and one bull. Plenty of meat on hand, just the other stuff."

"Any gardening? Anything canned for the winter?"

"No."

"Alright, I will see to it then," I said, going to the general store to see what they had. I was stacking beans on top of the flour and sugar when Jack came in and leaned on the wall near the door.

"Hey Jack, your usual?" the shopkeeper called.

"Yes. Plus everything she is getting. Have your boy load it. Girl, you sew?"

"Yessir."

"Jack. Get material. Something good and thick, Connelly, yarn too. You knit, girl?"

"Yessir."

"Pick some yarn and fabric. Enough for warm dresses and a coat and yarn for hats and gloves. Connelly get her some underthings too. Quit starin' at me girl and finish your list."

I spun away, trying to hide my shame of that rude man mentioning my underclothes. I finished the list, adding to it as I thought of things, not knowing what my aunt might or might not have. I turned back to Jack. "She is sick, what will she need as far as medicine, do you know?"

"That is all taken care of. Just get what you need to feed 3 people though till next spring."

"If she doesn't need anything else, then I am done. I assume she has things to cook on? Pans, pots, all that?"

"Of course. If you are done, go get in the wagon. Connelly? How much?"

I hurried out the door, watching the young man load everything into the back of the wagon. He gave me a grin as he looked me over. "I'm Matt," he offered.

"Lizzie."

"Y'ain't from around here?"

"No, Georgia."

"Long ways. You livin' here now?"

"Just till my Aunt doesn't need me any more."

"So you are staying with your aunt?" he asked, smiling again. "Not here with a new husband?"

I blushed, looking down. Matt was handsome, if not quite as broad and tall as Ray. It felt good to be looked at and smiled at. "I am just here for my aunt."

"No husband back home?"

"No."

"How often do you think your aunt might let you come into town?" he asked, leaning on the back of the wagon, looking down at me.

"Girl! I said get in the wagon! Matt, hurry the hell up with that, I have a trip ahead of me. And she won't be coming into town at all, find someone else to smile at, Jack yelled, coming out.

Matt was red to his ears as he scowled down at the things he was loading into the back of the wagon.

I went to the front to get in, but there was no low step for me. I struggled to jump up, to get a leg up to climb in, but there wasn't enough room the way the step was built.

Hands on my waist made me gasp as Jack picked me up and set me up in the seat of the wagon. I blushed furiously, but there was no way I was going to be able to get in and out of the wagon any other way. It was built for a man Jack's size. I wrapped in the blanket, trying to hide from the wind and not look at Matt. I was embarrassed for both of us, him getting dressed down and me needing help to do something as simple as getting in a wagon.

This place might have been a nice place with nice people if Jack hadn't been there to ruin it all. I liked Mama Banks and Matt seemed sweet and very handsome. The angry man didn't seem to fit in well at all here.

I was huddled in, still hiding my face when Jack finally climbed up in the wagon. "Move over," he demanded.

"I am on the edge?" I answered, my hip pushing so hard into the armrest that it was painful.

He sat down, wedging himself into the small seat next to me and shoving my hip further into the armrest.

I whimpered lightly at the pain and rolled my hip out of the seat to stand, rubbing my other hip. "I will sit in the back," I said softly, moving to climb into the back.

"I have things back there I don't need upset by your fumbling. Sit your ass down."

I tried to sit, but there was no room. I had to lean on my hip awkwardly, but it didn't really work for me at all as he flipped the reins and started the wagon moving. I tried to hold myself there, shivering until he finally growled angrily and jerked me up. He moved, spreading out in the seat, putting a leg on either side of me, then pushing me to sit on the floor between his legs. I huddled there, upset. What did he expect from me? He was a large man in a small seat designed to fit him alone. And he had been angry that I wasn't larger! What would he have done with a larger woman? Tears welled in my eyes involuntarily and I hurriedly wiped them away.

"Are you bawling?" he demanded, shoving me roughly with his leg.

"Stop being mean to me! It's not my fault I don't fit on your stupid seat or I am not as big as you think my aunt needs!"

"You aren't very smart, are you, girl?" he asked with a snort.

"What is that supposed to mean?" I demanded.

"How long till you figure out that you don't have a fucking aunt?"

"What? My papa told me that..."

"You expected him to tell you he sold you? To a man he didn't know. A man he fucking lied to. He said you were a woman grown."

"He... sold me? To... to you?!?" I asked, in a wail of confusion and horror. Anger hit me, white hot. "I AM a woman grown!" I screamed, standing up. "And you can both go to hell! I am NOT something that can be bought and paid for!"

He shoved me back down to the floor, hard and held me there. "Your pa gave me your fucking hand. We're married, bitch. That piece of shit sold me a lie."

"We aren't married! I never said yes to anything!"

"Your father filled out all the paperwork. Mail order bride. You agreed by showing up on that coach, now sit down, be still and shut up!"

"No! No! I was lied to!"

"I said shut up! Not another fucking sound. This is already a shit situation, I will put you in the ground before I let you make it worse."

I huddled on the floor in horrified shock. Papa had sold me. Sent me away. That was why he had told Ray he wouldn't give his blessing until he had us a house built, he never intended to just let me get married and leave him with nothing. I wondered how much this man had paid for me. Not a man. He was horrible. A monster. I broke down crying again and this time he said nothing.

He was quiet until it was dusk and he turned off the road to a small wagon trail that led through the woods and closer to the looming mountain. When it was almost dark, he reigned in and I looked around. I could see a single lit window and I saw the door open and a silhouette darken it.

"Pa!" an adolescent male voice yelled. "That took forever! Did you bring her? My new Mama? Where is she?"

"Start unloading the wagon, Henry, while I unhitch."

"She wasn't there?" the boy asked uncertainly as Jack stood and stepped off the wagon.

Jack reached back in and picked me up under the arms and set me down to stand on the ground. The boy hurried to me, then paused, looking down at me.

"She's so... short," the boy said. "Shorter than me. Is she really my new mama?"

I looked up at the young man, maybe twelve or thirteen. "My name is Lizzie," I said softly. "I am eighteen... I..." my voice choked then. "I am pleased to meet you Henry."

He looked at me, confused. "Pa?"

"Yeah?" Jack asked, unhitching the horses.

"This is really her?"

"I guess so. Sorry. Not what I promised, is she?"

"No... she's better. You said she might not be pretty, but she is! Pretty as ma was, even if she is short. Plus I bet she cain't catch me with a spoon to whack my hand like Effie did either!" the boy laughed. "Can she cook?"

"Her pa said she could. Go on, start unloading the wagon. You too girl, grab something and go on in. Start putting things away."

I was quiet as I grabbed my bag and one of the large bags of beans. It was almost too much for me to carry, but I refused to show weakness to that man. The house wasn't large, just the kitchen and sitting room open to each other and the two bedrooms off the back. One small, one large. It was messy, I noted immediately.

I set the beans down and lit a lamp in the kitchen, then started cleaning. I couldn't put anything away in this mess.

"Effie died last year," Henry said, setting two more bags down on the table. "She was the old lady that was cookin' for me and pa. That's when pa put the ad out. Said I needed a ma and he was tired of..."

"Hush your mouth boy," Jack said, hauling in more things from the wagon.

I turned my back to him as I cleaned, all of it really hitting me then. I was married. That awful, angry man was my husband. And I had a son now. A son who stood taller than me. At least he seemed like a sweet boy. I wiped my eyes on my sleeves while I worked, not turning as they brought everything in. Once I had it clean enough, I began putting things away and organizing, still not looking at them. They had sat down in chairs near the fireplace, watching me after they had brought everything inside. I could feel their eyes on me, but I tried to ignore them. I continued to wipe my eyes, feeling a burning anger for my father that I had never felt before. I had always known he was a selfish man, but I had never thought he might do something like this. Then lie to me about it, smile and hug me goodbye, promise to see me again soon as he sent me off. I didn't get to say goodbye to anyone. Did my brothers know I would never get to come back?

"Henry, go on to bed," Jack said quietly.

"I wanted to wait till she was done! Talk to her some."

"She won't be done tonight, do as I say. You'll have time."

Henry got up, then hesitated at his door. "Do I call you ma or Lizzie?" he asked me.

I looked over my shoulder at Jack, but he was staring at the fire, his jaw set. I looked at Henry. "You may call me whatever you like, Henry."

He grinned. "G'night ma! I'm happy you are here now! Can you make corn cakes for breakfast?"

"I will see what I can manage. I may not make them as good as your mothers."

"Oh, my ma couldn't cook at all. Effie could though! Effie made the best corn cakes!"

"I will do my best. My little brothers never complained," I answered, trying to smile at the boy.

He went into his room and I turned back to what I was doing. There was silence for over an hour, then I heard Jack stand. "Leave the rest for tomorrow," he demanded. "It's past time for bed, we get up early here."

I wiped my hands off and stood, turning towards him but not looking at him. "Alright. I will curl up right on that chair and get the..."

"No. Your place is in bed," he snapped.

I faltered a moment, holding my stomach. "I... I... very well. May I... have a moment?"

He made an angry, growling noise and stepped across the room to grab me by the arm. He yanked me into the larger bedroom and half threw me on the bed as he shoved me. I dropped down to the floor, trembling and shaking as more tears welled up. This time they were from terror over what he was about to do to me. I pressed my face to the wall as he started undressing, shaking my head and wishing none of this was real.

His hand closed around my arm and yanked me up to the bed, forcing me to stand on my knees on the bed as he undid the buttons on my dress with his other hand. "Please!" I whispered desperately. "I've never... I don't... I can't do this!"

He said nothing as he let my arm go and yanked the dress down, then off of me as he pushed me down on my face. I tried to roll, spin away, but he caught my leg and pulled my boots off. He let me go and I scrambled across the bed to press against the wall as he turned out the light, then got in bed. I let out a small wail of horror as he jerked on the blankets, yanking them over me and curled against the wall as tight as I could, huddled in a tight ball in nothing but my shift. I broke down sobbing as he moved and the whole bed moved, but no hand grabbed for me or struck out like I kept expecting.

He went still and I laid there, shivering in fear and cold, waiting. When I heard his soft snores, I knew he was facing away from me and I started to relax slightly. He wasn't going to force me to... anything? All he had done was put me in bed and covered me? Why not just let me sleep alone next to the fire then? Maybe he wanted someone to keep him warm? I didn't understand it.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I wasn't as smart as I thought I was. I never saw through my father's lies, never even questioned them at all. Of course I didn't have an aunt no one had ever heard of in a place as remote as this. Maybe I had no idea what it was I was doing out here. I was just someone he needed to take care of his house and his son.

I moved off the wall slowly, curling up in the blankets, trying to get warm. Almost as soon as I was warm, I passed out from exhaustion.

I woke first in the morning, when there was barely enough light in the window to turn the sky gray. I slipped out of bed at the bottom, easing over his feet while holding onto the footboard. I dressed, hurried to the outhouse, then came back in, shivering as I built up the fire and stove to cook.

Henry came out first in nothing but his nightshirt. "Corn cakes! I smelt'm in my dreams and woke up right off!"

"They'll be ready by the time you are dressed," I said with a smile and he bolted back to his room to dress. He came stomping back out, hardly in his boots at all as he fell into a seat, tucking his shirt in. I smiled as I set the cakes on the table.

Jack came out of the bedroom, scowling at the table. "You'll cook meat with every meal," he demanded. "There's bacon and middlin' meat in the smokehouse, along with venison and anything else I bring in."