All Comments on 'The Grass Isn't Always Greener'

Our hero handled it right, too bad the nurse wasn’t the one tho, she’d look great in a costume sexy nurse outfit as well as the real scrubs!

Yeah the thing is that even if things went according to her plan she would be chasing Tye 5+ years down the road and ruin everything.

She totally should have gotten an STD. It was all setup to happen after the first unprotected encounter.

A little long winded and some funky decisions but overall an okay story. But was it really a loving wives story since no one but his parents were married?

Low iq story about low iq ppl from a low iq writer. Comedy gold. Fml, all the characters here act and think like imbeciles trying to mimic real life. The story makes "sense" and is "coherent" in only one way - if the reader imagines the mentally handicapped on a trip outside their asylum.

Glad that you have decided to submit your stories here. You are fast becoming an author that I check for new submissions. How in the hell Hope (nice name choice) thought there could be any reconciliation after doing a three-some with his two friends is beyond me. Of course, if my fiance hit me with that crazy ass crap there would be no trial period just immediate removal out of my life and house. I know that story would be much, much shorter..

Keep writing and I hope you get well soon..

A well-done variation of the "I deserve this" trope.

Or, said another way, "I have to know if you really are good enough for me."

..

And in the end, she did get what she "deserved".

Although I wasn't totally onboard with all of it .... Well done! *****

Great story, thanks for posting. She got what she deserved, that's for certain. Happy he didn't go back to her, it was the right thing to do. 5 stars.

Great read

Good story but really it was done at her first announcement and why not the nurse? How did trish sneak in as the ending made it appear the the nurse felt they were serious? Implies she didnt know he was not exclusive.

Well, there you go ladies. Go ahead and be a slut, but be a slut early in life. But, ESPECIALLY be a discreet slut. No one wants to marry a slut!

I'm gonna be brutally honest:

In the beginning I disliked it, simply because of the almost pretentious choice of vocabulary, and the way your characters expressed themselves during dialogues. I spent the first two pages imagining a few bad actors on a theater-stage, dramatically overplaying their emotions, so people in the back could understand them without being able to see them acted out. It just felt unnatural... I don't know a single person who would form sentences like that in an emotional situation.

But after a while I found myself taken with the story, and although barely anything happened, I had to read it from start to finish in one go. Great Work, Mate!

5/5

Wonderful story, well told. The couple’s future hinged from the start on two questions for Hope. Was her intent to audition for a replacement? If not, why do it at all? Sex that rocks your world is great sex, whether you have wide experience or not. Even the most satisfied among us might — on a given day and under particular circumstances — find a more thrilling lover for a moment. True love is so much more than that.

This was all over the fucking place. And only the easily impressed brain damaged among us would find this cliched tripe even remotely good.

I miss you, and I want us back (goes out and fucks a million guys) Im happy we're talking so I'll go right out and fuck another guy, Im sad that our wedding would be shortly, now I'll go fuck another guy, now I want to be fucked to death by a huge cock and I still love you, and I want you back. Anyone out of the single digit IQ range can see the stupid woven throughout this pile of shit and one who's premise easily just falls apart.

Sorry this was written by the typical LW misogynist who tends to have a less than stellar view of women. In short it was laughably bad and even shortening it to the 2 pages it was worth still would not have made this less than an idiotic suckfest. I doubt you'll improve as a writer going forward. You are not worthy of 7 pages, plain and simple.

Clearly you aimed at bottom feeders with this, and I've yet to see much of any substance in your writing. So just keep aiming at the bottom and you'll be right where you should be here.

First of all, sorry about you having COVID, but you’re writing is really improving. Keep after it!

Well written yarn.

But Hopes only hope of reconciliation would have been if she had spent the 12 months with her legs locked shut living as a recluse.

Her only outings being to work and to a counsellor.

She blew all hope with her stupidity.

Cheers

Inadvertently, the truth rules. Claiming to want to try just one other cock is like claiming to try just one other restaurant, one other movie, one other perfume. There are millions, and you never get to try them all. The desire to compare your fiance' to everyone else is the hidden deceitful admission that your fiance' is somehow lacking, inadequate, leaves you wanting and wondering about more. You pick a profession, a house, a spouse, not because you have tried all the others first, but because you realize there will ALWAYS be alternatives, but in the grown up world you have to make a choice, a commitment, and stick with it. Hope did the right thing, she just did it dishonestly and cruelly. She may find her Tye and be blissfully happy for the rest of her life. Or not. But she will never have Michael, and in truth, she didn't really want him that sincerely. Not as sincerely as he wanted her. Not as sincerely as Trisha wanted him, for the rest of her life. Hope might have screwed her own life up, but she did Michael, and Trisha, a favor. Maybe she can find some solace in that, she released the man she loved poorly so he could have a woman who loved him completely. Good for you Hope. Now fuck off. But thanks for the effort.

Absolutely stunning. I generally eschew the "runaway male" plot device, as it usually portends a drinking, crying, self-pity circus. However, the way Michel fled, it was integral to the plot and flow of the story.

.

You're an amazing writer. You need to be sellin' this!! 5++++/5!!

His best move would have been to wait a few more years for the girl in the chip shop.

Culture matters.

Good story, well told.

Thanks

Stupid, stupid, STUPID woman. Hard to feel any pity for Hope. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. Well written story. What disturbing is that it's based off of a real person asking real advice. I feel sorry for the fiance.

This is like Netflix quality. Fifty stars rating if possible.

The story has some definite strengths, but here are some issues:

1. Learn how to use pronouns correctly. "He'll get a bed warmer, and then they'll never want to leave, and he might not want them to."

You can't even claim some bullshit "woketard social justice commitment" for that abortion of a sentence (same problem elsewhere). The best writers understand that pronouns must agree in number with their antecedents. I'm sure you can do that.

2. I understand that the "12 month plan" was a plot device to extend the story, but it's so implausible that intelligent readers will find it breaks their "suspension of disbelief", which good fiction requires. IRL, if someone were ambushed like that with the same sort of history as you have written, his reaction the following day would be to say adios, not that you can fuck around and maybe we'll get back together. There are various reasons for that. One is that he would conclude he never really knew the woman and that she doesn't understand commitments like engagement and marriage. The idea that she would "get it out of her system" would not be convincing. He would realize that if he were to marry her, even though they might live in wedded bliss for 10-20 years, there's an unacceptable risk that she might eventually find a new reason why he must let her fuck around ( "I'm getting older and need affirmation of my attractiveness", "I need to experience more of life", "I am irresistibly drawn to [some other man]", etc.). While that is always a risk, a rational man would see it as likely to be a greater risk with this woman who could, out of the blue six months before a wedding, simply announce that she needs to fuck around (a crude way to put it, but it's actually the most accurate way to put it). You are correct in writing Michel as saying that what Hope's request said was that he wasn't enough for her. No man or woman would ever be fully convinced that he or she ever truly would be enough after that. Another reason to simply break the engagement is that such a woman doesn't have the maturity to understand that we all have wants and desires, even extreme temptations, but an adult knows that in the context of a situation like that of the story you don't subvert a relationship by seeking or asking to act on them. Properly understood, engagement and marriage rest on far more important things than sexual desires. Placing a desire for sexual variety ahead of a prior commitment of engagement shows that that person is unfit for engagement or marriage. On an emotional level, no man or woman is going to take someone back under the circumstances you have written when he or she bounces through the door saying, "Honey, I'm done fucking around! I looooove only you!".

3. The blame spreading "We both made mistakes..." is a standard LW cliche that in this case, and in in most stories, is both inappropriate and offensive.

4. You have a penchant for writing the male character's parents as taking the side of the morally defective woman. Any normal reader is not going to swallow a mother saying to her son, in essence, "Overlook Hope's fucking around. Let her do what she wants and then and take her back." In what universe would parents want such a woman to be the mother of their grandchildren, let alone their son's wife? Certainly not in this one.

5. In accordance with item 21 in the LW cliche manual, you have Michel blubbering far too often...as well as including the drinking cliche.

6. The idea that after 6 months of fucking around Hope could "whistle" and Michel would come running back ring in hand is simply absurd. Moreover, with "Tye" you managed to insert the "big cock" cliche (number 9 in the LW cliche manual) into the story. First, how do these dicks show up all the time in stories? IRL, a. having a true 9" dick is a one in a couple of thousand event, b. having an abnormally thick cock is also a very improbable event. The compound probability is extremely low, but we aren't done. Such an anomally must be a. functional (some aren't), b. free of STDs, c. attached to someone otherwise physically attractive and with a reasonably attractive personality, and d. attached to someone who is age appropriate and known to the woman. Consequently, even though there are a very few such cocks, the total compound probability of actually encountering one asymptotically approaches 0. Yet we get them in story after story. Second, the "big cock" is thrown into stories because there is an assumption that bigger is better, which is ridiculous. Women, though natural selection, are built for "average". Obviously, they can accommodate variations in size, but one doesn't have to be an "extremely thick 9" to know that very, very few women will respond well to a dick that size - just being 2 or 3 standard deviations above average in both dimensions will often result in complaints if you aren't very careful, and sometimes even if you are careful. Cocks that are significantly bigger than average often cause women to tear, and the vast majority of women don't want to have their cervix pushed (they will tell you that it feels like they are being punched in the stomach). So, when an author includes this silly, uninformed cliche, it suggests that he is either insecure about his own dick or closeted (for homosexual males, the "bigger is better" fetish is definitely a "thing", but then so are bizarre insertions and other weird and disgusting practices). I'll assume you aren't either of those things, so don't do what inferior writers do.

7. There is no appreciation in the vast majority of LW stories that infidelity, or just consensually fucking around, destroys something at least as important as "trust", which is the usual focus of discussion in these stories. Fucking around also destroys the marital bond of exclusive intimacy (the same would be true of an engaged couple).

Nice story , your engaged to be married and decide you want other experiences. This is how that usually turn out. I think you made her a slut as she went sex crazy and expected her to go back to the way things were. This was the best ending.

Common theme, uncommon writing. Kept it interesting the whole way thru, altho I will never understand why some folks feel it's ok to hurt their significant other. How self-centered, how foolish, how shallow. 'I love Michel so much, I need to have sex with other men, just because I want to, no matter if it crushes him.' True love sacrifices for its loved one; pure selfishness never does.

Her Michel lets her have her way so she celebrates by getting fucked? I kind of knew it was doomed after that. I usually prefer reconciliation but I don't think it was possible with her attitude. Just to entitled and selfish.

Brilliant story, I really enjoyed this one. Bittersweet but then so is real life

Not bad, not bad at all except for a couple of things. How can you be so much in love and go from a man to a man like a common slut? What kind of emotional immaturity is that?

That type of character is phony. It is possible if she suffers from dissociative identity disorder or schizophrenia but there is no indication of that in the story. In other words the "Hope" character sound quite phony to me.

Another weak thing is the behavior of female friends. Why would anybody want to invest their time to stalk somebody who is not their problem? Following him? That does not make any sense.

As for friends stealing your mate that is quite common and happens regularly.

Couple of general inconsistencies on LW:

1. Here almost everybody has 7+ inch dick. No story here with main hero that has 5 inch dick.

2. "Woman can get a man much easier than a man can get a woman"? OK, then why are here so many stories about women being inexperienced? Is that because 5% of women are fucking 95% of men, pardon my mathematics? These ladies must be working on multiple fucks every day.

I knew their relationship was dead when it said she fucked that 1st guy Orlando 2 weeks after the separation. Mike was still crying in his cornflakes about his loss and not even returned to work yet and she's out whoring. That shows no respect,no remorse, and no willpower. Then in like 3 months she already has 9 dudes between her legs? Who'sarrying that chick? Only Cucks are marrying that chick especially after hearing the things she said to that guy Tye, 45 minutes after telling him she wants h back. That woulda killed any remaining love and I woulda gone for a TRO for all their stalking bullshit.

I really enjoyed this story, the characters, and the emotions, they were all well written.

Also never hurts that being an Aussie, I got the slang and the locations being discussed.

The only area that didn't quite ring true to me (but made sense) was him also partaking with various women. he came across as just a one-woman man. not someone that would have casual sex. However, it was a minor thing to me and I really enjoyed the story.

Well done!

Read all your stories, you are an amazing writer and all of them have been fantastic reads! I hope you have many more for us in the coming weeks and months!

Tremendous story about a pure bred cheater who could not even wait to cheat!

Another of what could have been if only A great story and even tho it explored the maybe of getting back together the attitude of HOPE towards this event really left her NO HOPE of him ever fully trusting him Been there done that It just does not work without loyalty and trust (jaybee186)

Why do people try to fix what ain't broke and then regret when it breaks from them tampering with it?

Very enjoyable reading. In regards to the story too long comments...I love reading as entertainment. I would rather have a longer story set in front of me than a "wham bam" type of encounter. My definition of a great story is when you get to the last page or so and are sorry that it is ending. This was one of those. Thanks!

Well done indeed.

Very good read. 5 stars. I agree with the others. The tag team is what hoes do. The taking tye in his bed was what did it in . Either way no matter who it would have been . The relationship died the moment she breached the conversation. Silly girls do silly things for silly reasons and win silly prizes.

There must be trust underlying any loving relationship. Once that is damaged it is almost impossible to recover and the relationship is dead.

You had to know Hope and Michel were never going to recover any of what they had. Hope was delusional in her thinking that any man could be expected to not react the way Michel did in the end. Self-centered, entitled, immature bitch, in her thinking an open arrangement would make their love stronger, and they would both benefit. I normally like to see reconciliation were and when possible, but when she wound up fucking the first one just two weeks later and then being excited to tell her possie of girls instead of realizing the folly of her actions, ... there just was no way it could have turned out differently. 5-stars.

Are all of you surprised that a selfish bitch did what she did? Women are more entitled to their emotions today than they were in the past. That is why divorces are almost 50% of marriages. Entitlement

There was the part which was implied, but not said. Hope was 17 when they got together -- good that you didn't say that they fucked when she was still 17, so you got the story past the censors -- while Michael was 21. Hope was a virgin, but, from his age, we sort of assume that Michael was not. Of course she was going to be curious about what other men are like, while he would be far less curious about what other women are like. The only question is: would she manage to tamp down that curiosity throughout sixty years of marriage, or would she have to sample the forbidden at some point, in secret, either before or after the wedding? This will always be an issue, perhaps deeply buried, but there nevertheless when one partner is inexperienced.

Naturally, she had to fuck Tye in a situation in which Michael would discover it, and hear her going on and on about his "giant dick," setting up a situation in which he knew he couldn't compete.

Of course, Michael screwed around plenty himself, mostly seeing the women he was fucking as just another piece of pussy. The story noted that there were plenty of single women in the school who would be after him now that he was free, but also said that some of the married ones screwed around as well; we are left to our imagination as to whether he nailed a married chick. Given that he was looking mostly for NSA pussy, screwing one of the married ones would have been on the table.

The writing was pretty good; points for that. But Michael is now marrying one of Hope's friends, one that he knows is willing to screw over one of her friends. That might not work out well.

Really liked the story. Consequences were more than appropriate to the situation. From loving fiancé to full on slut. And yet, she still professes her love for him. Another take on this, and perhaps worthy of a follow on would be that he agrees to s six-month separation, but if she has sex of any kind with another in those six months than the relationship is over. The struggles that Hope goes through during that six months would be an interesting read.

Hope should so happy no longer have to please anyone but self life is good enjoy

This was a very well written story. 5 stars. Definitely one of the better stories written here. The whole storyline was fine, the characters were nicely done, the whole concept was believable. Hope got what she deserved, good riddance. Her "friends" tried to talk to her about it but Hope had her mind set, to screw others while Michel waited for her, not happening. Michel found his true identity with a better friend and lover in Trisha. Bravo to the ending, was on the point.... Maybe there can be a second chapter, as to what happened to Hope, to her friends and Kim. Do the new!yweds find more in their relationship? Just a thought.

Really a very good story. - 5/5 -

It’s could habe been brilliant, but the ongoing repetition about the persons feelings, at least in the first third was a bit too much for my taste.

But please keep writing.

You just know that they could not go back to what they had. Relationships are also built on trust and she lost that trust when she wanted to fuck others. Good story, well written

A few years ago I read a blog post by someone which referenced a more believable Dear Abbey letter. The woman was in college and she was in a relationship with a man she was certain would be a perfect husband for her. Her problem was that she didn't want to be married until her late 20s. She wanted to date lots of different men and experience life before settling down as a wife and mother. (I don't think there was any issue about whether she'd been with other men. She just wanted a lot more experience with dating different types of people, etc.)

She wished there was some way she could lock down her wonderful current boyfriend to be her husband when she was ready to get married years into the future. She wasn't a cheat. She was just frustrated that she had happened upon the perfect mate many years before she was ready to marry.

Was there any way she could break up with him yet have the understanding that they should get back together when she was ready to marry? This type of cake eating entitlement or expectation seems to accurately reflect the kind of thinking that is prevalent among women today. I think it would make a great topic for a story in the hands of one of our talented wordsmiths. Doesn't require any cheating or lying. Just an exploration of the entitled mindset of a young woman and the mental torture she might be willing to subject her boyfriend to (someone she supposedly loves). The cheating so common in many LW stories can be an easy crutch. She's evil. The end. What about an honest woman in the throes of self-centered cake eating?

Knoxhard

timriv,

"That’s just the reason you never marry a virgin or someone who has never had sex with other people. "

I don't necessarily disagree. But there is caveat to the down side. The more sex partners a woman has had, the more likely she is to eventually cheat. That has to be considered.

Knoxhard

Hope was just a cheater waiting to emerge, he's the clear winner in this one. ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

All relationships are like a stool. It’s based on three legs; love, trust, and respect. One of the legs can be compromised and it can still function. But it’s not necessarily comfortable or stable. When two legs are compromised, it’s broken. Hope broke Michel’s trust and respect for her by making her request and how she proposed it. The end was inevitable after the 12 months. It was guaranteed by harassing Michel’s to the point of compromising his relationship with his parents. She had demonstrated her willfulness to get what she wanted at Michel’s expense. When someone shows who they really are, you’re a fool if you don’t pay attention. Trisha took Hope at her word that Michel was a free agent. It’s unfortunate for Hope that Trisha’s history with Michel gave her a distinct advantage over any of the other random women he could possibly engage with. ‘Dems da risks.

Great story. 5-star effort.

Hooked

Only read through the middle of page two when he said "I agee" to be your cuckold little bitch. It was well written until I quit, but i wasn't going to waste my time on this. He should have called off the wedding and kicked her out that night.

😂 What a load of crap... The guy should just break up on the spot and move on. Why carrying pain and be miserable and wasting an year..

She is not a beautiful, wonderful person, but a selfish vile human being.

Michel was right when he said she should have never agreed to be engaged in the first place. Screwing his friends on her part was the the worst especially but you see the foreshadow those events when they broke up.

Thank for writing a great story

Maybe a followup story, say 5 years kater to see how is doing in life

If you’re not ready to commit 100% to your fiancé, you shouldn’t be fucking engaged! Michel was right, she should have been honest with him when they were dating. Possibly she could have dated others, fucked around and then settled into a serious relationship and engagement with Michel.

Well written, her adventures seemed a bit exaggerated, but that was kinda her plan, so?

You continue to impress.

Enjoyable read. Hope locked in at 17 years of age had a reaction which one could understand as being applicable to others (male or female). A big world out there to be explored and experienced.

Nicely done. Certainly a morale to your story. If one still has longings that have not been satisfied it is best to consider your long term plans before acting. Five *s. Thanks for sharing.

Waay, waay, way too harsh on the

She wanted to try some new dick. Timing was poor. Using friends was a very poor choice. This sounds like a high school drama, not one of adults. The main character way way way overreacted. JesuChristo!! She wanted to try a different dick. Maybe he could have taken control of the situation and made it good for both of them. Instead, he goes all "I can't believe she could possibly want to sample more than my incredibly amazing, though average penis".

Why the rush to get married anyway? At 21? I know I was all about nothing back then and am glad I wasn't saddled with or saddling anyone else with the dramas of that day. These two didn't need to be married because neither sounded more than 18 years old.

engaging read...could have avoided the 'big dick' cliche for my taste..

Not up to the quality of your previous stories

In the end, they all got what they deserved. If anything, I don't believe Hope loved Michel as much as she believed. When love is true, why put it all at risk; trading a lifetime of love and happiness for a night of lust and passion. Oh, we girls may say, "oh yeah, but you haven't been fucked by ..." and we all laugh. But we all choose love even if we say otherwise. We don't risk losing it. Would you risk you child's life by not using a car seat? Even for a short drive to the store, it won't take long, just about six minutes? Of course not. You love that child too much. Hope risked her husband though. She risked the happiness that they shared. Hope, lol, a perfect name for a hopeless girl.

Well done!

She wanted to try slut on and it did not fit as she tought it would. What man would want her back after that shit storm. Glad he found a true wife.

4 *

Great story.

I found the story to be excellent, very touching. I get the logic in someone being curious about other lovers if you haven't been with anyone else, but I side w/ Michael. Six years into a relationship she is still curious, and after being engaged? Anyone that wants some strange after 6 years is not ready to commit to a monogamous relationship. BTW, nice touch including the column linkage that inspired the story.

Gripping, but understandable from both perspectives. Talk about being at the edge of a waterfall….

Some interaction like Hope had proposed had all the effects of dynamite on their relationship.

Micheal survived with Trisha’s being at the right place at the right time to change his life to moving forward.

Good Stuff!

Thanks for that! I’ve always wondered how this open marriage ,concept might not survive, although I admit it crossed my mind at certain parts of my 59 year marriage…the desire for “greener grlass”

Beejay3

Really enjoyed this story but i notice that everbody rushes along at the end with a breif summary of how things go afterr the break up just as you do here. I'd reallt like a chapter or 2 about how thing go for Hope dealing with the aftermath, shes lost her love to her former best friend, her friend group is spilt, everyone knows that she dumped her former fiance to have casual sex and that shes been doing that with countless men. How would all that affect her? What would her life be like having to deal with her new reputation? How would her friends and family treat her?

I feel there is a little more story to tell and it could actually be more interesting than what we currently have.

Awesome

Very good.

Patriarchy. It would prevent every story where you feel a twinge of a compassion for the poor, foolish girl who needs to suffer for things to be right.

"My body my choice." No.

"If we're equal I get to do this." No.

"I want to experience different things." No.

It's not misogyny, it's care.

Well-written with a predictable ending. Just seemed implausible that two people who supposedly loved d each other so much could casually have sex with multiple partners. Four stars ⭐️ for this one.

Started well.

I liked his idea of a year. That was unusual and interesting.

But then the plot got diluted with low morals

and wimpiness.

Lost all flavor and my interest in it.

3 out of 5 from me.

A bit of a swing and a miss. Good bones of a story, but went off the rails when Hope was bedded within two weeks of her breakup with Michael. And she continued to be promiscuous, atleast for the first 6 months. That isnt someone who is heart broken over her poor judgement at broaching the concept of an "open" period of time b4 settlin down. A much better story would have been for Hope to vow chastity, and good behavior, to win Michael back over the 12 mos, with maybe a mistake here or there thrown in for drama.

Great story. If you meet some one early, whom is the one, you don't get the chance to experience lots of sex with other people. She really should have seen other people in the dating phase. Plenty of drama, he was far more mature the she was, usually the other way around.

Good story and well written. Shit like this does happen. Every day. Mine ended with me happy. And 40 years later, that's all I care about.

The story was not bad but I see it as the life of a weak man, who play the girl's game and decides to suffer waiting to see what she does when he knew what was coming. Then he fucks her friend and in not time he is in love with her and ready to marry her after 8 months of breaking up with Hope, and why this bitch did not go to jail for attacking Trisha?

I don't understand why the writers of these stories think that a fairytale ending is the best ending. It is not realistic, real life is different. I will give you ***** for this1

I appreciate your great writing that if you did something as an extended epilogue for Hope, I would eagerly read it.

BlueGee - thank you! 5 stars from me. I think that this one is your best! Maybe I think that because my wife and I endured our own similar crisis. We're still together, thankfully.

Excellent story.

Sad endings how stupid she was but my question is who put the suggestion in her head. I no longer know why I read these.

I loved this story. I read the columnists article you mentioned, and liked how you worked in the details of the letter 's contents into your story. Ignore the haters, this is easily a 5 star story. Because if the length of the story, i put iff reading this story for 2 days

It was a little childish and the pacing and forced plot holes were a little jarring.

It was written decently, but it felt disjointed and forced. He was her soul mate that she loved more than anything but she bangs his friends?

Just felt manufactured to be the most hurtful as possible, could have used a little more character development.

5 stars on this one, great story and well written.

When he hung up on her after she called and again said take her back i dont see her calling tye for sex as the normal reaction. I think she either stays alone for the night or most likely calling her best girlfriend. That lost it for me but i see how it was used to solidify his position in the story as moving on. .

What was his fucking plan? he talks about it a couple times, and after he catches her with that guy they talk about how it will all work out and at the end he'll have the girl....Im so confused, because the trisha scene is written as if its an accident but he instantly falls in love with her so that couldn't have been the plan.

Page 1.

And then he dumped her and lived happily ever after.

Page 2

Blah, blah, blah dump her.

Page 3

Great! Now move and leave no forwarding address.

Page 4

OK fine. NOW forget the whore.

Your best work! Very nice, realistic play of emotions and reactions. We’ll done.

Gotta' love a happy ending.

I agree with King_MacAulay. Hope's selfishness caused this and it would be good to hear how she faired after realizing she destroyed her relationship. Maybe a bit about her sense of loss and realization of how she destroyed everything. You could have her wallow in her mistake or, after some time of misery (because, come on, she deserves to be miserable for at least a while for her selfishness), maybe some redemption by learning from her mistake and being true to a new love later, if not a lesser love but a lesser replacement for the love she callously threw away.

not bad. better than most, too much wailing and gnashing of teeth though.

No one is ready for commitment when they are a teenager, as shown in this story. The hormones are flow and curiosity abbot sex is forefront in young peoples hearts and heads. This was quite evident in Hopes thinking. She just had to try out other people. Call it curiosity or just plain lust, sex is a hell of a motivator as theses stories show time and again. If you truly care fore and love someone there is no timeout for that love. The writing was ok but it was pretty evident from the beginning that Hope's curiosity killed the relationship. There is no blame on either party it just wasn't meant to be. I felt the story was a bit drawn out but it did keep e turning the pages, so to speak..

Well written and fairly enjoyable. I look forward to reading more of your stories.

However, I think the story could have been improved with more nuance. By choosing to portray Hope as a selfish, lust driven idiot/villain (and Michel as the entirely right and moral hero/victim) you missed an opportunity to tell a more realistic and complex tale. I would have taken Hope’s worry/obsession more seriously. People absolutely DO have feelings of FOMO or worry that they might be making a lifetime commitment without having experienced enough of life to not be perpetually wondering “what if” or if it’s a good decision. The juxtaposition of youth vs experience and the struggle between regret of never trying something new and remorse for making the wrong choice was there for exploring, but ultimately not taken.

Great story. 5stars

Hope turned out to be a real SLUT! She was not wife material. She will be always be looking for the big cock but each relationship will never last because big cocks aren’t monogamist.

Gave you 5⭐️s.

You take an old plot. Write a story that is entertaining. Include characters that are believed and that a reader can identify ,sympathize or dislike.

Well that is an excellent story 👏 😀.

Everyone knows how it was going to end.

Your talents and skills are in the details.

Thank you very much for an exemplary example of storytelling 🤩.

I'm very

*

*

*

*

AMerryman

Thank you for the enjoyable read! Look forward to seeing more of your work.

Killian