The Hired Gun Ch. 03

"Hey nothing; you're going to tell my mother this prepared motherfucking statement and nothing else. Next time she calls you, and I know she will, negro; you're going to say that you don't know shit. YOU DON'T KNOW SHIT JAQUAN!! Make her believe you're that dense. It's not that hard, believe me. I already believe it, negro."

"You ain't gotta threaten me, bruh." He was almost whimpering, making me even angrier.

"Did you hear what the fuck I said, Jaquan?"

"Yeah."

"You don't know shit; now get me a large deep dish stuffed with pepperoni and tomatoes. Get some sides and make sure you hook me up with a damn salad. Andre can have a fucking kid's meal or something. Oh yeah, bring my fucking change back with a receipt, nigga." I slammed in his face or the approximation of it with an android phone.

I bent over faceplanting in front of my editing bay silently sobbing for a while thinking of my mother's face that first time I got exposed. Jaquan's infamous baby mamma number two was looking to deal me a knockout blow by sending Porsha Simms to my front door. I wasn't home for the initial blowback especially since Porsha had degenerated into an out and out crackhead. The result was all the same as I was evicted and had to speak with my mother through a proxy, her boyfriend Gene.

"Oh well, time is money." I leaned back resolved to avoid my inevitable excoriation by any means necessary and get on with my life.

The one positive was there would undoubtedly be no contact with my father whatsoever as I'd already been tangentially disowned. Of course, fate stepped in when I hooked up with his live-in "sugar baby" Erica Walton and his girlfriend, her mother Babbs Walton. Both ended up switching places and I'd been coerced with blackmail into banging the mature so that Erica could get back into the home after catching a case and an eviction from my dad.

"Aw shit." I trudged across the suite to the main bathroom to get some water on my face. Auntie Esther was curled up in the tub sobbing. There was this sort of echo in the room that made it sound hoarse and masculine to the ear. Maybe her thick syrupy accent had something to do with it as she looked up finding me there.

"Guess I messed it all up, huh?" I just gave her a half smirk and sat down on the closed toilet.

"I'm over it."

"I'll make it up to you anyway I can."

"I know baby." I felt like I had to present a strong front as she dipped her head sobbing uncontrollably with her knees drawn up and her arms folded across them hiding her face.

I got down beside the tub turning on the water making it warm while I caressed her back with my other hand. My invasion of her phone yielded more information in the form of a texted picture from said uncle revealing her quote-unquote "replacement" as a last emotional jab to my auntie's ego. The pic revealed this shady looking sister with a youthful curvy frame highlighted by some wide hips over a nicely cinched waist. She had a conventional look facially with a shock of dingy highlight brown hair that may have been an outright wig.

"I'm sorry boy." The thing that stuck out was that woman sort of grayish skin tone and this big ass gap in her teeth. She was wearing a cheap looking pink t-shirt and some oversized gym shorts that formerly belonged to my Auntie Esther. Her ass was big enough to make them look honest. She wore flip flops.

"Stop crying auntie; only a fool would cry about a dumb ass nigga trading a steak served up on fine china for a turd on a paper plate. Esther peered up from the fort created by her folded arms. Her weathered narrow face was full of creases and her eyes were puffy.

"Thanks, but I'm no better than that hoochie, he got over there now."

"Oh yeah; tell me auntie; how'd your sugar daddy arrive here in town when he wants to clap those big ass cheeks of yours?"

"Huh?" She sniffled.

"You heard me."

"Uhm, he's got one of them private planes like all the important people. Told me he flew in and took a helicopter here to some of me. I think he just says that to impress me, though." She was starting to cry again, but I wiped her tears forcing a reassuring smile.

"Well, tell him to send you a pic of him in or in front of that plane and forward that shit to my uncle."

"Aw, that's kiddie shit, boy."

"So what; you'd better do it or else." I threatened.

"Or else, what?"

"You're going to make us both look like fools on everybody else's level when we know that shit ain't true. He went dumpster diving while you can fly to Dubai or anywhere else in the world, on your guy's dime. How does that compare, auntie?"

"You just wanna start some mess." I understood her wisdom but didn't care as the water started to rise while I rubbed the outside of the thigh facing me.

"No, I want everyone to know exactly who we are." I had to position her legs straight in the tub starting to wash them and her snatch until she took over with a hand towel offered. I stayed there with her as she washed up intermittently breaking into muted crying. Her tears were wiped away each time they appeared.

"Uhm, you got me some real nice fellas to mess around with for the last two days. That new one today is your friend, right?"

"Cousin, on my mother's side with everything to lose too. You ain't gotta worry about him, auntie." She paused for a moment looking at my face, then resumed washing up as I turned off the running water.

"For some reason, I feel like you got a handle on thangs; I feel like it's gonna be alright."

"I hope so auntie."

I pulled the door up leaving her to clean up walking back to my editing bay setup at the desk. My heart started pounding when I noticed several messages flashing on the face of my phone. I chucked it into my camera bag having a seat in front of my laptop. The fake tinder account and others had come alive in the time I'd been talking with Esther. I dismissed all of them except for the one I was looking for. Dayna had blown up my DMs with messages and a pic which I opened.

"Got you." It was a pic of her own diminutive butt, ghetto tattoos and all.

She was seriously interested in "Harry Balls" probably finding humor in the fact I used "The Real King Ding-A-Ling" as a subtitle under Jaquan's pic as a personal inside joke aimed at her shitty online exploitation of her husband, Andre. We had a lively ten-minute conversation before I cut it short as Esther reappeared wrapped in a towel. It was obvious what was on her mind.

"You sing those papers?" Her expression changed.

"Why do you wanna know?"

"I ain't trying to stop you; but sit on it for a minute or two and don't talk to your husband."

"I'm good with it being over."

"I know but I want you to send that text we were talking about earlier."

"You were serious about that?"

"Fuck yeah, I was auntie; at this very moment a shitload of gossip is running through both sides of my family probably about us having some kind of affair behind my uncle's back, no doubt. I'm gonna have to be cool with that but it still doesn't change the fact that he replaced you with a hood booger."

"Hey now, you wanna meddle with my husband?"

"Ex husband." I corrected watching her shoulders slump as she retrieved her phone texting almost on command. She looked like she'd been hit in the gut with a cinderblock at the revelation that her husband was two or three steps ahead of her. My mind was a few months backward in the past at the picnic in his backyard the day I first hooked up with his trophy wife. His disparaging words about my girlfriend Vickie Stone sight unseen lingered in my mind sporadically making me want to dent his chin.

"Alright I sent it, but I don't know how long it will take to get a response."

"Don't worry about that shit right now; how're you doing?"

"I feel like uh, God done blew up my skirt with a hurricane and I ain't wearing no panties while everybody looking." I leaned an elbow on the desk resting my chin on it, chuckling earnestly.

"You aren't wearing any panties, auntie."

We both chuckled as she walked over, putting a hand on my shoulder. My hand slid up under the large bath towel which was only enough to cover her huge butt halfway leaving her front exposed down the middle. I settled for cupping the deep undercuff in the middle of both cheeks. My middle fingers teased her slit enough for her to plant both palms on top of the desk.

"This been one hell of a weekend with all the screwing and everything; I think it's helped me not go ham and drive back home. No matter how you slice it, we're kind of the bad guys here."

"Why do you think I want you to send that pic?"

"Oh, so you're embracing it now."

"What choice do I have? It's time to stop getting carried along by the current; my parents know. That means everybody else knows some version of the truth. Me, I've just been holding water for various reasons and the more I do it, the more it seems like bullshit. I got into this shit by happenstance and I'm good at it, real good. If my father wasn't a cheap skate, I wouldn't have hooked up with his girlfriend's daughter who encouraged me to make a sex tape. If my mother hadn't left a nineteen year old me with my dog ass cousin to babysit while she was on vacation with her boyfriend, I never would have met infamous baby mamma number two, at length. If Renee had never taken me...yadda, yadda, yadda; get what I'm saying, auntie?"

"Damn, I'm sorry."

"For what, now?" She'd been rubbing and massaging my left shoulder.

"All those times I called you a boy."

"Yeah?"

"You're a man." Esther nudged my knee squeezing between me and the desk planting her huge naked butt down in my lap. My crotch was hidden from view, but I knew she felt my business well up on demand pressing against her slit. The only thing stopping us was my jeans. I half turned positioning her on my left knee as I reached just under the towel cupping and sucking her right breast. The thick rubbery nipple inflated in my mouth providing a chewy treat.

"Aw yeah, you been spoiling me all weekend." Esther cupped my cheek with her opposite hand faux nursing me as I played, and vacuum sucked that nipple until she yowled. I fondled the other, flicking the nipple.

She peppered my temple with wet kisses until my lips met hers, then parted.

"Guess we should've done it in the tub, huh boy?"

I chuckled then undid the lazy knot holding the towel unconvincingly to her body. Her energy was warm and inviting while she read overtly demure as I captured her wrist prodding her lightly to stand up. My hands framed her small waist giving the soft flesh there an encouraging squeeze as I planted my lips on her perfect bikini navel parting them unseen letting my tongue dart back and forth. Her scent was there assailing my nostrils as she moaned rubbing the back of my head.

"I wish I was your age right now; we'd be running off to the chapel."

"Shotgun wedding?" I asked after running the flat of my tongue up her abdomen towards her breasts.

"Heck no; after all the good loving you've been giving me, I couldn't harm a hair on your head. I'd at least be one of them there side women waiting in my bed with the night light on hoping you'd slip between the sheets. If I was younger, would you make me a side lady?"

All ten of my fingers were outstretched pressed into her crotch, thumbs touching. They approximated the look of a butterfly for an instant before I slid them to the abundant rounded curve of her hips. Esther had the pure definition of baby making hips with a powerful frame born out of nature and hard work in her youth. I planted a plethora of light kisses on her shaved mound, tickling her clit a bit. Esther's hand appeared framing her sex spreading it as much as she could vertically until that button appeared.

"I don't care if you wouldn't make me one of your side ladies; I give you a key to the house and my fucking car. You're so good and there ain't nobody can take it away from you. Hey, I'm not just talking about your loving; and I ain't saying that because of what happened, either." She cupped my chin directing my gaze up at her face.

"That never crossed my mind." I drew her in close pressing my face into her tummy secretly rattled at my situation afraid to look at the face of my phone sequestered away in my camera bag. My hands cupped big handfuls of her buttocks.

I slipped a finger inside her honeypot getting an acute flinch as she reacted squinting with one raised brow.

"Guess them boys done bombed out my baby bucket for sure, huh?"

Esther shrieked when I stood up fluidly taking her into my arms like a newlywed. The shocked look on her face was priceless as I planted her on the bed gingerly. My eyes roamed over her body taking in everything settling on the stocking cap still on her head. It was sheer enough that I could see her salt and peppered naps, sort of naturally in these odd little twisty shapes. The southern girl was laid bare underneath my eyes looking unsure of the future despite not having a care in the world economically. She'd already landed on her feet but felt otherwise after losing decades of familiarity.

"Uhm, when you feel better; can I have sex with you before you go?" Her eyes flashed a bit of emotion.

"Sure, we can do it anytime you want; and even after I go to my new place. That sheik fella kind of weird wanting me to tell him about my uh, physical situations on that facetime while he jerks off. That movie you made with me, and that Andre boy got him excited. Said he wants some more, and he's willing to pay top dollar too. He ain't gonna mind me still working on stuff with you; and that's a fact...aw, sorry about telling too much of my shady dealings."

"Esther. "

"You're better than both of them boys you bought over here to fuck me; and on the lord's honest truth. I was just uh, punch drunk...dick happy when I said what I said the other day." She backpedaled verbally wringing her hands randomly tugging on a pointer finger.

"Hey." I offered both hands pulling her into a sitting position on the edge of the mattress.

We exchanged glances, then hugged deeply as she started quietly sobbing with her face hidden in my chest. I didn't say anything because I knew she needed it as someone started knocking on the door.

"Housekeeping." I was thankful for the interruption, leading her back to the bathroom to make herself presentable before I left the duo of cleaners inside to service the room. I stuck my head inside the main bathroom finding her there looking at herself in the mirror.

"Hey." She flinched looking at me with a hand pressed to her bosom.

"Yes?"

"Cut that shit out; can you do me a favor, auntie?" Esther was already shaking her head with a heartened smile wide enough to make these deep-set dimples appear at the corner of her mouth.

"Sure can."

"Babysit?"

"Huh?" She raised a brow.

"Andre."

It took her a minute to make the connection.

"Oh, yeah; alright I'll let him hang out tonight." Just like that we were back to some semblance of normality. I didn't mind the blue balls collecting my pizza from Jaquan before we went our separate ways without much of a word between us. We both knew I'd punked him throughout the day and I decided not to push things further as we went our separate ways. Andre was left behind with Esther.

I packed up and hit the freeway happy to be returning home to edit all the footage, drama free. Once I was on the freeway, the weight of the world came crashing in on me as I made sense of my situation. It started out shady, but playful with my former auntie. Now, I was indelibly cast as the black sheep for all time to come. I decided not to speak with my mother and my father wasn't an issue anymore. I had an angry chortle realizing he might catch hell from my uncle because he couldn't get his hands on me.

Esther's behavior had been overlooked by me for most of the shoot but came into play once I had a second to look her in the eye. It was the look of quiet realization that you've hit a dead end. It was a look we shared and part of a bubble that was becoming more visible with each passing moment. My thoughts drifted to that first incidental hookup with Erica Walton. I remembered the rebel spirit of it more than the sex itself which was decidedly subpar. She'd become much better later, perhaps out of pharmaceutical happiness. I'd missed the fact that she was positively sociopathic.

"No rest for the weary; shit, I must have angered the fucking gods or something."

A familiar Bentley was sitting with its front end up on the curve further than the last time. I had my driver's side window down with an arm propped up as I glared across the front lawn at the woman sitting on my front porch. I missed the good old days when I was blink, and you'll miss it invisible to women. I was so far away from the assumed blank state personality assigned to me formerly, that I might as well have gone to another planet. I decided to be a dick, turning up my radio...loud.

Mrs. Gilbert was suddenly serenaded by The System's "Don't Disturb This Groove" as I had a slice.

I relaxed my seat leaning back as I finished off the slice watching her from my driver's side window noticing that she was glaring at me intensely. There was no doubt in my mind that I was supposed to be some collateral damage in whatever she had going on with her adult daughter at the moment. Part of me wondered if she regretted releasing her daughter's trust fund now realizing it was the only means of keeping the wayward sometimes villain under heel. I could tell by the pointed, malicious expression on her face that both mother and daughter were cut from the same cloth.

I cut the music snatching up my box of pizza underarm like a library book as I got out of my car strolling across the lawn to the edge of the hedges. Her eyes were following me while her head didn't move. It felt like a lioness was eyeing me right before she pounced. It felt like a Mexican standoff as I looked at her face, then away chortling to myself before raising a palm.

"Ma'am, Mrs. Gilbert...Angela I'd like a moment to decompress before you do whatever it is you've come here to do."

It looked like she'd come from the gym wearing a light pink cropped long sleeved hoodie that left her abdomen exposed. There was a narrow horizontal oval cutout that exposed the cleavage underneath. Her lower half was covered in some skintight gray leggings that stopped at her calves. I glanced down at the ankle socks and Nike Air Max sneakers on her feet. My gaze drifted up to her stern-looking face which made me crack a half smile as I took a seat beside her on my porch facing the street.

"What's so funny?"

"Ah, counselor I take the fifth." I deferred the question.

"I insist."

I glanced over, noticing a bottle of Crown Royale on the outside of her right hip. Its royal purple cloth sack was half drawn down and the upper half of the liquor inside was gone. I placed the box of pizza across my lap opening it exposing the pie inside.

"Peace offering?"

She looked at my face for a moment as she took a slice.

"I still insist."

"Oh, you'll be mad; I'd rather not." I shot back as she munched on the slice while I placed the box on my opposite side. The outline of her bust in profile indicated she wore nothing underneath. When she looked at me pointedly then down at her bust, I motioned towards the bottle. Angela smirked angrily, favoring the bottle before handing it to me. Her narrow eyes became slits when I flinched momentarily.

"Now tell me."

"Well, uh, I used to tell your daughter that she looked like a certain celebrity. She already knew this because it happened a few times before, but now as I'm looking at your face, well...uh, you'll be mad."

"Samira Wiley?"

"You know already?"

"I got that down at the firm because of that "Orange is the New Black" show and the fact that I'm an attorney; shit got old real quick, but it lingers. I heard from one of my few remaining acquaintances the comparison was made at the party where my nude was displayed prominently. Heck, my first year there everyone kept calling me Cecily after that actress, even had my business cards printed with the name."