All Comments on 'The Honeymoon Ch. 02'

ever heard of punctuation? try it...you'll like it

Very brave of you to leave a rude comment "Anonymously"

As I said at the start of the story this is my first attempt at ever writing anything like this and I am writing for fun and nothing more. I'm not a professional and far from it .... you could have left a genuine/positive reply advising me of punctuation for future stories but instead you did it rudely and by being anonymous. I bet you have never wrote or published anything so unlucky on your failed attempt at trying to make me feel negative about it and maybe you should grow up and humble yourself!

Not really sure why, but reading a story where "you" could be swapped with "she", kinda kreeps me out.

Also try counting how many words your last sentence holds (I counted 95). That makes it very hard to read, especially without commas either.

But otherwise a nice try!

I thought I would add the woman to the scenario as it's kind of different to the "usual" take on this scenario. I appreciate your words and will be honest I didn't think about the reader I was just thinking of the scenario and I will no doubt take what you said on board for future stories.

It's a unique take on a story, but I guess it just isn't for me. I read the first chapter, and it almost struck me as "role-playing", almost. Also, the husband licking someone else's cum from his wife's pussy in this one just grossed me out. I basically skipped to the last few words when I saw there would be swingers. It's a good start for your first try, and I guess pretty good for people who enjoy this kinda thing, but just not for me. Keep up your writing, though. As you get used to it, you'll find a better rhythm and flow, and you'll improve your technique.