All Comments on 'All Black Ch. 01'

Great beginning, actual conversation, albeit with some sexual overtones but nevertheless involving philosophical and theological questions that could spark genuine intellectual awareness! A thinking person’s erotica, what a unique concept! I desperately hope the dialogue continues, perhaps first kisses over a discussion on Kierkegaard, dinner with Friedrich Nietzsche, or perhaps Ayn Rand! Carry on, please!

The author has bitten off an awful lot to chew - but so far, so good

How the author handles the defloration scene - I’m thinking that will be a tough one in a story where the characters are already discussing Thomas Hardy and the nature of God - but the defloration scene is what draws me in

Thank you!

I wonder how the Angel handles the God or death and destruction?

One thing that doesn’t ring true and so I am hoping you will go there is the diatribe about “ceaseless desiring onto death” of wealth and power. Dry capitalist dogma. I hope your anti-hero is more interesting than that! I was intrigued why you didn’t have our heroine say in response: “Why?” It would have been interesting to hear the reply you would have given SB to say… I suggest this because you are setting up a. I dichotomy with her feeling oriented approach with his take charge worldliness and cynicism. Her best qualities are on display—her decisive thought processes as she affirmed her feelings and choices. Pygmalion? Kali?

All three comments are definitely giving me great food for thought.

I'd thought of the Kali angle and intend to do something with it but Pygmalion will take some research! Kierkegaard, Nietzsche and certainly Ayn Rand will be present if only implicitly.

I don't want to stray too far from the source material, but since at least some readers seem interested in the concept of "a thinking person’s erotica" (borrowing Another Chapter's phrase) maybe I'll try to think of a premise that gives me more freedom.

Yes, well it is a 'thinking person' and it is erotic so a dash of Hemingway would spice the conflict up a notch. But, definitely a chapter 2.