All Comments on 'The Kitchen Floor Pt. 02'

Split roast is so hot

Enjoyable story, but you need to stop switching the POV from third person to first person. It destroys the readers suspension of disbelief. It also changes the focus of the narrative. Are you trying to emphasize the dominance or the humiliation? Changing the POV, especially mid paragraph confuses the reader and dilutes the impact of the story.