All Comments on 'The Nuclear Family Pt. 04'

[24.12.22]

Top Shelf writing!

Compelling narrative, good character development, satisfying outcome.

11/10!!!!!

i have to say i just love your stories well constructed loads of detail and they are not short at the end of the story you have promised stories that have not been published i eagerly waiting for them 5 stars + for me

Outstanding

An enjoyable story. As with anyone else’s writing, there’s always the “ I don’t think it would go that way” but it’s his fictional world so deal with it.

That was a bloody good read mate. Cheers.

I liked the story, but I think it wasn't forgiveness that he gave his ex-wife and sister. That was condescension.

wonderful..tremendous character development and feeling. you are amazing at making us feel

for your characters..the story is Very Long and took us fro one tribulation to the next..

I love your writing...one of the best authors on LIT.

wonderful..tremendous character development and feeling. you are amazing at making us feel

for your characters..the story is Very Long and took us fro one tribulation to the next..

I love your writing...one of the best authors on LIT.

Great story telling!

Really liked the story. It felt like a mash up of two of my favorite stories by Xalir (he posted on another site before his untimely death) - the stories being Third Times a Charm (family knew and kept quiet for two years) and Trading Up (MMA fighter that uses his wife's behaviour as focus for his fighting). Hheck there are elements of The Party in there in terms of the conspiracy to keep everythnig secret but that was the MC's friends keeping the secret there.

Anyway, Thanks for the read and ignore the anon posters. They hide behind that to post hate everywhere.

"They are two very pregnant, hormonal women. Without insulting them, I don't know that deductive reasoning is always front of mind.."

Fucking patronizing, insulting and incredibly sexist. What an asshole

quirky, unrealistic, but totally enjoyable even after the second read, thank you, will wait impatiently for more

AngelRider must be pregnant and hormonal.......I'm just teasing. Your comment along with the quote was just to ez a target. Yes, I'm an asshole, but I was just teasing.

AngelRider: Indoctrinated much to the leftests side of things.

It's a known fact that women's hormones change with pregnancies. So in no way was that patronizing, insulting nor sexist.

A very well written story.

As a man whose birth mother acted in ways quite similar to Brad Sr and with whom I cut all contact between my family and her (so she never met her grandsons), I sympathise heavily with Robbie. Thank you for a superb story of a man fighting against the odds to make a success of his life and of the woman who made it possible.

hello, my name is Robert. And I have a real Nuclear family! yes, it really sucks to know that you are not loved and cared for as a part of something bigger than yourself, or even part of what all around you call family. It has always been this way as far back as I can remember into my youth, until this very day. Imagine having your mother tell you that she wished she had bashed your head in while you were a child because you would never amount to anything. or that she hates you so much she wished you were dead. not to talk about beating you with anything and everything she could grab to hit you with, or even the fact that she has been married 7 times now. robert-walters@comcast.net if you want to chat, my door is open

The last part seems dragged out…infact the whole first page here seem contrived…like a soap opera just trying to drag the time!! Seriously…he could not simply say- Amy these photos are when we were married?? He had to say- it’s not what it looks like without qualifying it??? Come on..seriously dude?

Having read this 3 times now I can honestly say wow, awesome story. I am in a similar situation but with my son acting like

Brad Sr so I feel for the MC.

BrentJW

You and other commenators are concerned about the father's hatred for his second son. I can assure you it happens. It does not have to be logical or even rational. It does not even need a basis in reality. But it is very very destructive to all whom it touches. I speak from experience.

If you are going to give us a long look into the future to finish, you may need to back track and consider what technology was actually available at the time the events would then have happened!

Loved the story. The one area I would like some clarification on is the "othering"😁 of Robbie by the family. It seemed to precede his establishing his superior level of competence. I feel sorry for Georgia. I think being abandoned by her father left her vulnerable to manipulation by men.

Yep a good series, my usual gripe is it all comes down to money in this again, but I know it’s just to make it easier to write, my other gripe is why does he have to be so bloody clean, Mr Nice guy ? It became a bit sickly to me, but overall a good read.

Well written and intense, I was not able to stop reading it.

A most excellent tale of dysfunctional people living out there dysfucntional lives. I know what that is like. Five stars.

Not sure I understood everything I read. I mean how do people act that way for so many years?

And it seemed somewhat melodramatic in places.

That all said, it was a rare gem in this LW universe. And now sits comfortably in my top favorite of all time.

Goodonya, mate!

Really liked this story, did feel it was just a little drawn out to long, but at the same time liked the ups and downs, really made the story. Call me a little Sentimental but I was hoping Robbie and Amy would of helped his ex wife Georgia and her two kids after he forgave her. Since they had so much and she was Struggling to raise her two children. They could have if nothing else, without her knowing it, helped he get a really good paying job or something, after she was his wives sister too..

While I enjoyed it, I did have some gripes that pulled me out of the story. To start, it's just way too long, the dramatic tension becomes repetitive and a little boring because you know exactly what's going to happen, because it's already happened before. Could have cut the story in half and it would have been much cleaner imo.

Second, I think you're envisioning kickboxing as far as the fighting goes, as there was no MMA in the story, there was no grappling, wrestling or BJJ, just kickboxing, Small gripe, but it pulled my ADHD brain away every time you mentioned it.

The last and probably smallest gripe is, the venture capitalist business, it felt odd that she says they invest hundreds of millions but make almost no profit(6million is super small for an international VC firm) not a big deal, but it felt kinda weird that they were flying all over the world and dealing with all these things and making less than most firms make in a week.

Other than those, some typos and misused names throughout which wasn't a huge deal, a little far fetched and overly dramatic at times but I enjoyed it none the less. Well done.

I must say that forgiveness is very good for the soul. Hate and bitterness will drag you down both physically and mentally and in some cases can cause severe illness. I know the first thing a person who has been betrayed by someone they love such as spouse or family can result in some very nasty serious feelings which in some cases result bodily harm befalling the party's involved e.g. killing both persons (spouse and their lover) or a serious ambush beating on the male lover in which he may never be the same after. In this story the father tries to kill son in a public way, which turned out son gets shot several times, but son takes him out. This story had some sad moments too. Robby's mom was caught in between a rock and a hard place when dealing with her husband Brad and it was probably what caused the tumor in her brain. I was glad she finally reconciled with Robby at the end. Its too bad she passed away.

I think you could have had Robbie's Mum more involved in his life before she died as she was being manipulated by his Dad. I think you were being too hard on her, as Robbie's Dad was controlling her too much. I think Robbie's Mum was surprised when Robbie quit the business and the family after he put two and two together a realized his dad was behind all that happened, for over three years and his sister Joanna was a ware of the affair between Brad jr and Georgia. Robbie did the right thing. Georgia should have done the right thing by telling the truth instead of falling for the family B.S. and trying to justify her betrayal. If Robbie had done what he was considering, suiside, it would have been over and done with. Robbie's Mum should have sought Robbie out and apologized instead of letting it fester, maybe she would have not developed a brain tumor and died to soon. I know what it is like when a family takes sides and there is not any communication. By the time it comes home to roost too much time has passed for reconciliation. Forgiving family is harder to do.

This was a brilliant story. Well written and the perfect length.

An excellent story.

do everyone a favor and stop writing lol

A little message to "Anonymous" who wrote a comment three days ago, If you didn't like the tale, then why the hell read it. At least the author put his name to the story, can you do the same? Rant over, the second time of reading and it's still a good tale.

I never tire of re-reading this story, thoroughly enjoying each time.

The drama with the bitch Hattie was too much!! WHO THE FUCK CREATES DRAMA MINUTES BEFORE A MATCH!!

One screwed up Brad Other family!

Damn, what a soap opera. I mean this story has it all: cheating, divorce, family feuds, bastard kids, illegal revenge porn, attempted murder, assault with a deadly weapon, and probably more that I don’t remember. I would love to see the TV movie they made out of the whole mess. Thanks, o2o1, for a pretty darn good story.

Five stars

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️

Always enjoy your stories and this was no exception. Hell of a long tale but no harm in that. Congratulations on producing so many twists and turns and ,maintaining interest.

Actually brought a few tears to my eyes towards the end! Wow!

Really enjoyed reading this story. Gave it 5 stars! The time you spent with the characters was great. Just as I thought what was about to happen, you changed things up a bit.

I believe it's one of the best stories I've read on literotica.com.

Looking forward to your other stories! Cheers mate!

Sorry this chapter was a bridge too far⭐️⭐️⭐️

this brought tears to my eyes many times.In general i think I have read all your stories in a week. My only thing I would have changed is with georgia, since it seems she was really raped and taken advantage of. I would have had Amy and Robbie help her

At 74 soon to be 75 I kind of thought my families story was unique. It is not. You have pened a story that is very close to ours. Having lived through it I can tell you it is not worth living through a second time.

Some of it made me weep. I could empathize with your main characters. I lost my rose colored glasses a long time ago, so I pay attention to what people say, sometimes between the lines. Life is tough, but the tough keep going and persevere to make the best of what they have or in some cases don’t have.

Really enjoyed the series.

Someone else said it: Great Soap Opera. Five stars.

Overall a good and compelling story, a bit longer than it needed to be, but you forewarned us about that. However (there’s always a “but”), I thought your description of the fight scenes was okay, but I didn’t understand your word choice, and I don’t think it was because of the difference between my American English, and your Australian brand. For example, during fight scenes you kept using the word “hits” when what you were really talking about were punches, kicks, or other strikes of one sort or another. Fighters don’t use “hits” in their terminology. The only times “hit” is used in sorts that I can think of is in baseball, American football, and hockey. Boxers and karate fighters don’t “hit,” Rather they punch, kick, or strike.

Also, your description of Brad, Jr.’s criminal trial was beyond implausible. Although I’m an American prosecutor, I’m pretty sure that there isn’t a criminal Justice system anywhere in the English speaking world that would allow a prosecutor to call a defendant to testify against himself, and against his will. Just isn’t allowed. I get that it’s fiction and you have some story telling license, but that one is a bridge too far. It just wouldn’t happen, anywhere in England, the U.S., or Australia. Protection against self incrimination is at the core of these legal systems. A judge just wouldn’t allow it, and a defense lawyer would lose his/her mind witnessing it.

So what we find out is that a young and impressionable Georgia was not only manipulated and controlled by a narcissistic patriarch but was actually raped and blackmailed/Stockholm syndromed by him with the aid of his fkwitted son. Yes, getting a girl blind drunk and then having sex with her is rape.

All the while the erstwhile hero sobs into his mom's panties. Runs off and then pretends he's the hard done to one. He failed to protect his wife from his predictors abusive family. So what good was he as a husband?

For his age, even as he aged, Robbie was Other-wise. Found the story to be quite gripping. But one question regarding the wonderful sunsets. Being located on an eastern coast, the sunset, except for maybe a quirk of coastline bending, would be behind them, would it not?

I love these long epics. This was just outstanding.

This was a great series, John. Thanks for posting it up for us to enjoy. I do have a question on a few of the stories you wrote about at the end of this epic in your afterward. I see that you have added the progress on "She’s Cheating on You" and "On the Streets" on your bio page, but was wondering how you are coming along with "The Sound of Silence" and "Swings and Roundabouts" as I don't see them listed on your bio page. I'm not trying to be an ass and telling you what to do, but was just curious as you mentioned them above. Again, thanks for the entertaining stories you post for us. Oh, one more thing I want to ask you; I see you abbreviate "Junior" as JNR. Is that the Aussie way to abbreviate it? Because here in the US, "Junior" in a proper name would be abbreviated as "JR". I'm just curious about that.

I really liked the story. I admit I wanted to read Robbie beat his father and brother half to death in the first part.

Great story I k ow I started it some time ago but somehow never got to the last two chapters. Funny enough reading your stories is never just about the sex. It is an emotional roller coaster, I laughed I cried, I mourned the losses. Maybe it's the actor in me feeling ties to characters so well written. I really do enjoy all your work as sometimes I just come back and reread something. Thank you for continually sharing your talent with us.

I'm shocked at Robbie's response to finding out his wife was fed alcohol and drugs and then raped by his dad and older brother. Trying to blame her because she didn't confess all to Robbie is absurd. The shame and guilt would have been bad enough, but that it was family, a controlling family no less, just makes it all that much harder. Not saying Robbie has to like her, bit really there is nothing to forgive, because that would be victim blaming.

The whole story was a mixed bag, as they say. It started off good then got a bit fanciful then got a bit stupid. I feel Georgia could have been helped a bit with money when it was fund out she had been used as tool and badly manipulated. Yes she did a heinous act but was just a glove puppet in the end. One can help someone that is down but you don't have to love them. I do feel sorry for the Mother as she was as others were manipulated. IN the end she pushed herself to have one last interaction with her son. Gave it all for that one last conversation and that consumed the the last of her energy. In the end had the mother and Georgia left the family they may well have been harmed. The fighting was an add on that I feel took things out of the story and/or blotted it. 3 stars.

Heck of a good read

Of the stories using this trope, I enjoyed this the most, even though it dragged a lot toward the end. I mean, really dragged. I have a hard time believing it was seriously proofread. Too many unforced errors, including various names being misspelled (ALRO/ARLO, etc.) Please, have stories proofread!

But again, story wise, this was the best of the son outcast trope. Overall, I look for and enjoy all your stories, and any new one is a treat.

JPB

Oh. I forgot. Four stars for a story I liked.

JPB

Well written. The sunset scene where Robbie's Mum passes away is some of the best writing I have read on the site Thank you

I found this to be a very satisfying read and enjoyed the story. Please continue to entertain this Yankee with tales from down under.

I have only one little thing that I get stuck on. Not a big thing really. I am curious about why Robbie never changed his name instead? To Brown when he married Amy? I kind of logically figured the name would be something he would change to separate himself more. If your quitting the family I cannot fathom keeping the one thing that ties you to it in the public eye like your surname does. I can not see Robbie wanting to have is wife and children use that name.

Thanks for writing this story. As I enjoyed it quite a bit. And I agree with how you ended it with a non-fullburn sorta speak.

Always a good read. Thank you.

2nd time reading and it's even better

Great story

I am laughing as I read this. But not at you Mr Other, more to the negative comments that people have written below. This is a seriously great story that hits all the right Loving Wives tropes and does it well in a really enjoyable way. Those who read LW thinking that all the stories need to be realistic need to have your heads read.

This guy is an amazingly dramatic writer, I loved the screaming at his family in the first part. I loved how Robbie and Amy got together in the second part. It was obvious about the pictures at the end of the third part (but I think you meant it to be) and for me, it made me smile and want to read the fourth part.

Now seriously, this fourth part. Loved it. Between his mother, the reconciliation with his sister, and the meeting with his ex-wife. the mini-series and to top it off the fight with his bastard father. I Loved it!

Write what you're gonna write Mr Other, Ignore the haters, most likely they can't write themselves and can only comment and spew their hatred at someone who kicks ass in all his stories.

You are a rare talent in terms of storytelling, don't stop writing and please, please, please give us something new soon!

Australian champion? after 2 fights? did I miss something? I admit I skimmed most of this long winded rubbish, piss poor fighter, always losing until he gets angry? So much for all his alleged martial arts training.

👋👋🙋🤷🤞👍👏✌️👍💯💯💯🍕🍕🍺

Well done in every respect. Thank you for sharing your amazing talent with us.

I have read several of your stories, and I'm so impressed with your writing.

I don't care they are long, they need to be as you unfold so many aspects of the characters.

Five stars shining brightly

Great work.

5 Stars don’t begin to express how much I like this story. You write very well and have a fantastic ability to draw the reader, this reader at least, into the emotional currents of the characters in the story as if we were there. That is a very powerful talent. Bravo.

"I won the fight in Johansaberg after that. The guy had pumped himself so full of his own hype that I think he believed it." YOU WANNA TRY THE CHAMPION DRICUS NOW YOU WEAK WIMP ROBBIE.

Excellent story. Thank you. While your stories are principally about betrayal and pain, the better truth is that they are about love and it unconquerable power. And forgiveness is an essential element of that power.

What awesome tale, I appreciate you not going for the full burn, with all of your characters.

Thank you for sharing,

I think the comment from 18 days before this one needs to lay off the roids a little.

It's a story, enjoy it for what it is...

An amazingly well thought out and enjoyable tale. A little far fetched at times but still really enjoyable. Thank you for the story and keep writing as you have a talent that is beyond my limited writing ability...LOL. Keep the stories coming.

Enjoyed the story even though it’s way over the top. The shooting was nonsensical. A top shelf mma fight, a guy gets into the ring with a gun and isn’t taken out by armed security? Don’t security guards carry guns in australia?

Anyone can write a story that has the hero with all kinds of money and all kinds of capabilities and contacts, but it's hard to keep those characters and stories from running off the rails. Yours didn't, yours went off the rails early and just got worse after that. Should really have put this story in the fantasy category.

Could have been a good story, would have been better with about half the words. The more long-winded it gets, the more boring it is, and this really got boring. And the writer's notes at the end we're really weird. You seem to be way too caught up in yourself....

Not bad, 4*, this chapter in particular had some emotional moments. Glad I didnt read most of Chapt 2 and all of Chapt 3. It was basically summarized here. I like happy endings so that was here too.

Great story thanks. I hope you keep writing I enjoy your work

Excellent story, thank you sir.

Cant anyone in Australia make a pot of coffee at home?

intriguing story although I felt the unabated hatred from the father was a little over the top

This Truely was in my top 5 stories I’ve read on literotica and I’ve read thousands in the decade or more I’ve been an avid reader so many many thanks as I’m positive I will reread it over and over in the next 5 years.

Why is it always the cowardly anonymous commenters who are horrible with no constructive criticism just shite abuse when they have zero talent at anything except maybe masturbation.

I don't normally bother with the comments but after spotting that of Lynchpin right at the top, I scrolled down and was pleased to see the positives outweighed the negatives many times over. I was also amused by those who insist that fiction must always match reality somewhere in the mutliverse. Pity they weren't around when that guy Shakespeare was scribbling.

Otherwise a definite five stars.

Great, solid story with enough action to keep things moving. The ending is a great place to end, as well. Thank you.

Fun good v evil storyline.