The Only Constant is Change Ch. 08

"So, what'd you think?" he asked.

She didn't answer right away. Unbeknownst to Jeremy, she was terrified of how he was going to react to how she'd just acted, now that the moment had passed. When he said her name, she finally answered. "It was incredible," she said, quietly.

Something about her tone caught his attention. "Are you okay?" he asked, concerned.

She snuggled into his chest as deeply as she could and hugged his waist. "I'm better than okay, but I'm afraid of what you must think of me. I, uh, did some things just now that might seem a little unusual. I don't want you to think bad about me."

He joined his hands at her shoulder, hugging her tightly to him. "You don't have anything to worry about. That was so hot! I'll admit I was a little surprised when you licked your hand and mine, but it looked like you really enjoyed it. That's all I'd ever want for you."

Hearing his words, most of the nervous tension went out of her body. She sat up. Still looking down at her lap, she quietly asked, "If I tell you something, will you keep it a secret?"

"Of course," Jeremy said, taking her by the hand. "You can tell me anything you want and it stays between us."

Hannah took a deep breath and started, "In high school, I dated a guy a couple of years older than me my freshman and sophomore years. I was kind of a prude initially, and I didn't let him do much more than feel my boobs for a long time. But I started hearing from more of my friends who were trying different things, like fingering and giving blowjobs. I decided to surprise him with a blowjob one night."

She chuckled, more to herself than to Jeremy. "I ended up being the one who was surprised. My first blowjob was terrible. I didn't have any idea what I was doing, but eventually I made him cum. I think it took him by surprise, because he didn't warn me, and he shot right in my mouth." She looked into Jeremy's eyes. "Some girls might have been mad or something, but I loved it. Not 'enjoyed it,' or 'had fun.' Loved it. The feeling of making him shoot in my mouth, and the taste of it...I was hooked. We dated for about another 6 months after that, and I practiced on him as often as I could. I think that's why we didn't have intercourse until right before we broke up.

I've had a few boyfriends since then, and I've given...let's just say I've given a few blowjobs. But, until tonight, I've never given a handjob or actually seen a guy cum in person. Isn't that weird? I've always had them finish in my mouth. I've got to tell you, having you cum on me was one of the hottest things I've ever done. It felt like you were marking me as yours, and I felt so...submissive. Right then, I wanted everything you could give, and I was happy that I could make that happen for you. And your taste, oh my God, it was fantastic. I couldn't help but lick my hand, and your hand, and I would've licked anything else that had your jizz on it."

Jeremy was floored. "That's...that's so freakin' hot. I was worried that you were going to be offended or disgusted when I suggested shooting on your stomach. When you came back and said I could cum on your tits...I almost wasted the shot right then." He kissed her head, stroking her arm. "Hannah, you don't ever have to worry about what I'll think of you. I barely know what I'm doing, so if you ever want to try something with me, just ask. I'll literally be your practice dummy."

Hannah didn't say anything right away. When she did, she sounded thoughtful. "You know, I like you a lot, and not just as a romantic interest. The same things that make me think you'd be a great boyfriend make you a good friend. You're not taking applications for a long-term girlfriend, and even if you were, I don't know if I would apply. It was torture for me this semester, especially after Spring Break, knowing that you were here and I couldn't be with you. Summer's going to end, and you're going to be gone. I don't know if I could handle the separation."

She sighed. "The truth is, we have no real future as a couple, right?" Jeremy nodded sadly in agreement. The next thing she said surprised him. With a mischievous gleam in her eye, she said, "The timing may not be right for there to be an 'us,' but that doesn't mean we can't still have some fun. Tonight was...amazing, and there's a lot more I'd like to do with you. So, let's just be 'friends with benefits.'"

When Jeremy looked at her in confusion, she said, "It just means that we can do things like tonight without expecting a romantic relationship. If one of your girlfriends isn't available, or if you just want to hang out, you call me. When we get together, we might just eat pizza and watch a movie, or we might do...other things. Whatever the mood calls for, no pressure, no strings. And when the summer ends, we go our separate ways with, hopefully, a lot of good memories."

Inside, Jeremy was shaking his head once again at the absurdity of his life. He must be doing something right to keep attracting these girls, but he was darned if he had any idea what it was. Out loud, he just smiled and said, "I think that sounds like a great idea."

They'd ended up spending quite a bit of time together in a more platonic capacity this summer. Jeremy was surprised when Ava began suggesting that he invite Hannah along with their other friends when the two of them planned "fun" outings, like trips to the lake or fishing at the pond. The two girls quickly became friends, and it wasn't uncommon for Jeremy to catch the two of them talking and giggling together, always just out of his earshot, but clearly about him; the frequent glances his direction that preceded the heaviest of the giggling made that apparent.

In his dreams, the three of them spent a lot of time together, sans clothing. Alas, reality never lived up to fantasy. Still, he and Hannah eventually did sleep together, and it was everything either of them hoped it would be. Without the added pressure of a relationship, they were free to ask questions and try things that they might not have otherwise. It was a shame that summer had to end. He was going to miss her.

*****

The lone remaining domino was the one that didn't fall. That it hadn't fallen was perhaps the biggest surprise of the summer for Jeremy.

From the time that Ava and her family returned from their trip, Jeremy unknowingly gravitated towards Ava. It wasn't like he woke up one morning and thought, "Ava's the one for me." But when he got lonely or just wanted to talk to someone, he found that hers was the number he dialed first. It was an unusual day when he didn't spend at least some time talking to her, either via phone or in person. It wasn't long before his guys friends began to jokingly throw around terms like "pussy whipped" to describe him because even when they were the ones making the invitation, Jeremy often put them off until he had a chance to see what she was doing.

It might have been a reaction to Serena's trip to Europe and its aftermath, or to the strange date he'd had with Lanie, but even with the exciting new happenings with Hannah, Jeremy began to withdraw back to a more traditional type of relationship with Ava. He still saw Serena occasionally, but there weren't that many weeks between her trip and when she needed to head back to enroll in school. By the time she left, their relationship had ground to a natural, amicable halt. His times with Hannah were fun, but infrequent. As she'd suggested, they really only got together for "extracurricular activities" when Ava was unavailable, unless Ava suggested inviting her along.

Meanwhile, Jeremy and Ava were spending more and more time together. Frequently, one or the other could be found hanging out at the other's home, often staying through dinner. While Jeremy couldn't see it himself, his mother and father had many discussions between them regarding how serious their son's relationship with Ava seemed to be growing. They weren't worried at all; they loved Ava immensely, and if somehow their son ended up marrying her, they couldn't imagine a better daughter-in-law. But they also knew the difficulties of military life, even when you were living at the same duty station. Maintaining a young love over distance, particularly when Jeremy would be incommunicado for periods of time for training and school, was a big challenge. Too many of their friends' relationships had crumpled under the pressure through the years for them to dismiss the possibility.

Much like Jeremy's parents, Bonnie and Edward Powell were concerned for their daughter. Also like his parents, it was a concern borne of a desire to shield the teenagers from heartache. As far as Bonnie was concerned, Ava had struck gold with Jeremy. True, they had a unique relationship, with their non-exclusive status, but when the two of them were together, it was plain to everyone around that they shared a bond that was unusually strong.

For her part, Ava was doing everything she could to change Jeremy's mind about trying to make a go of it long-term. She loved him, it was that simple. In her mind, that love would be enough to carry them through the struggles, but only if he returned it. She was hoping that she wouldn't be left pining for him without hope when he finally shipped out. In the meantime, she continued to secretly relish hearing about Jeremy's episodes with Serena and Hannah. She was still a little mystified how she could feel like she did, but there was a definite part of her that felt like her support of his other girlfriends was an expression of her love for him. She'd been so curious about the phenomenon that she'd done a little internet research. That's when she'd first learned of the term "cuck quean," and begun to examine those feelings a little more fully.

It was about three weeks before Jeremy was scheduled to depart when his life plan shifted again. They'd spent a wonderful day fishing at the small pond on his family's ground. Afterwards, they'd made love on the inflatable mattress that, after the events of his birthday, he'd kept in his truck permanently. Laying there, basking in the warmth of the sun and the afterglow of their activities, the two young lovers were silently holding each other. Suddenly, seemingly out of nowhere, Ava burst out into tears. "It's not fair!" she sobbed.

Jeremy hugged her close and kissed her hair. "What's not fair?" he asked.

She sat up and looked at him with tears streaming down her face. "It's not fair that we love each other this much, and in three weeks I'm going to lose you forever. You love me, I know you do, even if you won't admit it to yourself. How can you just throw away what we have?"

He sat up and opened his mouth to reply, when it hit him that she was right. He was stunned to realize that despite his best intentions to avoid a long-term commitment, he'd failed. He wanted Ava in his life, and he wasn't ready to give her up.

"I can't," he softly said in wonder.

She caught her breath. "What did you say?"

He cleared his throat and sat up. He took her hand, and with a deep breath, he looked her in the eye and said, "I said, 'I can't.' You're right. I'm in love with you. I..."

That was all he got out before she bowled him over, holding his face in her hands as she kissed his lips over and over, still crying, but with happy tears now. "I knew it!" she said. "I knew you loved me, too." They kissed passionately for a few more minutes, before lying back once again in each other's arms.

Several minutes later, he quietly said, "You know it's going to be hard, right? We're going to be apart, and I'm not going to be able to talk to you every day like I can now. We'll be able to write letters while I'm in boot camp, and then we can talk more once I'm in school. But you'll be busy with your own school and making new friends." He rolled over and rested his head on his hand. With a worried expression, he asked, "Are you sure you want to do this? There are a lot of guys out there who could make you happy. If you have any doubts..."

She silenced him with a finger to his lips. "Jeremy, I've known that I was yours for months now. I've thought about it a lot lately; more and more as we got closer to you leaving. What I realized is that I was a little in love with you before we talked that day in the brush pile. The past few months have just cemented it in my mind. You are my guy, and I'm not interested in looking for anyone else. There's no one who compares. So, in three weeks, you do what you have to do. I'll be okay, now that I know that you love me back. And I know that we'll be okay. And there will come a day, when we're ready, that I will join you and never leave your side again.

We will get married and fuck like rabbits, and I'll complain about getting fat when you put a baby in my belly. And as soon as I can after that first one, I'm going to beg you to do it again. As many times as you want. We'll watch them grow up together, get married and start families of their own. And through all the ups and downs that our lives will have, I will be there to hold your hand and to help you and to love you, and you'll do the same for me. That's what love is to me. Our downs are just starting earlier than some. So, no, I don't have any doubts. Now," she said, pulling him over on top of her, "make love to me. Please."

Jeremy had been stunned at the passion in her voice. She'd clearly put a lot more thought into her love for him than he had for her. That realization was the source of the apprehension he still felt weeks later, sitting in the airplane awaiting takeoff. He'd spent the last three weeks examining his own feelings. Finally, he'd determined that the vision she'd laid out was one he wanted too. The "someday" he'd vaguely held in his mind about marriage and his future now had a definition it had lacked before.

He just hoped they were strong enough.