The Void

Jake noticed that he was slowing down, and then he felt it...the muscles of Victor's shaft were squeezing with sharp spasms. His partner was breathing heavily, clutching Jake's hips with a vice-like grip.

As Victor pulled out completely, Jake began to stand up, and as he did his gaze met that of Mark, who stood a short distance away. His mouth was gaping open in disbelief. "Oh no...Mark," Jake said with a shudder.

"I...I thought you were taking a long time, so I came down to help..." he turned around and went briskly up the trail.

"No, wait, Mark!" Victor had his hands up to his forehead, his eyes open wide. "Oh god." He paced around twice, "Come on," he said scooping Jake up in his arms, "we have to resolve this."

Victor quickly made his way up the hill and back to the cabin, setting Jake down gently on his feet. Neither of them knew what to expect, they didn't know how Mark would react to what he had just seen, but instinctually, they both knew there was no point in denying what had happened, they had to address it.

Mark was sitting on a rock, holding a red blanket in his hand. He stood and went over to Jake, handing it to him.

Victor helped wrap the blanket around Jake before saying, "Mark, I don't know how to make this easy, so I'll just say it. I never planned for this to happen..."

"Yeah, that's a lie," Mark chuckled.

"It's true," Jake pleaded. "It just happened."

Mark shook his head, "No, no..." he said looking off into the forest, "I'm not an idiot."

Victor closed his eyes, scared and unsure of the moment, "Mark I swear to you that we can all get through this, nothing is changed. Nothing will be different."

"Everything has changed," he said matter-of-factly. "From the moment you carried him up here that rainy day, everything changed."

Victor held out his hand as if to reach for his brother but couldn't find the words that would follow.

Jake tightened the blanket around him, his eyes dropping to the leaf-littered ground beneath him. "I knew they were right."

Mark turned to him, cocking one eyebrow, "Who?"

Jake responded quietly, "At the camp, they taught us that homosexuals ruined society. I didn't understand what that meant until now. How I came in and suddenly screwed everything up for two brothers. We corrupt men, that's what we do." His eyes dropped tears from his cheeks, "They told us that homosexuals are nothing but a burden, using up resources and never producing children to help grow society. I saw them kill two men. I knew one day I would meet that fate because I couldn't control myself. I escaped. I thought there had to be a better life waiting, there had to be a place where I could feel at home." Jake wept, covering his eyes with the blanket. All the pain he endured: the loss of his family, the hard labor, and the beatings he experienced...were all just confirmation to him that he was never meant for this life. "I deserve to end up like those men, stuffed in a mass grave and forgotten!" There was a silence that followed, the birds were no longer singing, and the only sound was a faint rustling of the trees in the warm afternoon breeze. With his eyes still covered, he suddenly felt arms wrapping around him. He lifted his head to see that Mark was embracing him, leaning his cheek on his head.

Mark pulled back only far enough to look down into Jake's eyes, "Now that is a bunch of nonsense."

"I don't understand...you said I changed everything."

Mark held him again, tighter than before in his masculine grasp, "I'm sorry, I would have re-thought my words if I knew it sounded that way. Yes, you did change everything. You made everything better! I don't know how to describe it...what happened yesterday when you held me and told me I'll be okay, I needed that, more than anything in the world. There is something special about you."

Victor nodded in agreement, his eyes meeting Jake's.

Mark sighed, "I didn't mean to make you think I disapprove of the both of you, I was just shocked when I saw you minutes ago." He continued, "And that garbage about being useless. I don't think that's true. Victor has watched out for me all these years, he's been my family, the best person I've ever known. When surviving became tough, he could have abandoned me to watch out for himself, but he always put me first. And when there wasn't enough food for both of us, he always made sure I ate, even if he couldn't. I owe him my life." His eyes switched between both of them, "I'm not ashamed of either of you. If your character says anything about your purpose, then maybe it's not to breed, but to nurture and protect. That's what both of you have done for me, in one way or another." He was now peering over at Victor, "And if all you want in return is a companion, I don't think that's a lot to ask for in life."

"But..." Jake wiped a tear from his cheek, "I thought I ruined things between you and Victor?"

"No," he said still holding tightly, "I'm not angry. But I do think there's something Victor should be truthful about."

"What?"

"Look at the blanket, it's a different color than the ones in the cabin, right?" Mark watched as Jake looked down at the blanket around him. "It's a spare blanket."

"A spare?"

"Yeah," he confirmed, looking over at Victor who was pacing slowly with his hand behind his neck. Mark continued, "We have to keep spares because of the cold winters, they don't all fit in the cabin, so we keep them under the floorboards, along with spare cooking utensils and other things." He cleared his throat, "Victor could have easily got you one of your own, so you wouldn't have to share his."

Jake was confused and turned to look at Victor, "Why?"

Victor had his hands on his hips, "Jake," he closed his eyes to find the right words, "from the first time I carried you in my up here in my arms, I knew there was something special about you. I don't know why, but I immediately cared about you, and I knew...somehow...that you would care for me too." He walked up to Jake putting his hands on his shoulders, "I lied about the blanket because I wanted you. I wanted to be near you, and to hold you. I think we have a bond that goes further than something physical, and I want us to have that." His eyes welled up with tears, "I don't see myself being without you."

Jake stood there for a moment, his fingers fidgeting within the blanket. He knew that what he had here at the cabin was everything he ever wanted. He had a family that loved him, and a companion that cherished him, and he had a way to contribute to the survival of the two people he loved. He stepped forward, first with his left foot, and then again with his right. With each step, he believed more strongly in his determination until he opened his arms to receive Victor in a strong embrace. They held tightly and then kissed. And then both of them opened their arms to receive Mark, who shut his eyes and rested his head upon theirs.

As they let go of each other, Jake scratched his head, "Mark there's something I don't understand...if you knew there were spare blankets, why did you continue to let us share one?"

His lips curled into a smile, "On the first night I had actually forgotten about them, but the next morning I woke up and saw that you two were cuddled up together. I've never seen anyone as happy as you both looked. I guess I wanted to see what would happen."

Jake grinned, taking a step back. His foot gave out beneath him. "Ah!" he winced from the pain.

Victor caught him before he fell, and motioned for the rocks saying, "Oh, here, why don't you come and sit down, you shouldn't be on your feet this long."

"Actually," Jake said sheepishly, "I...I can't sit down."

"Why not?"

He blocked part of his face with the blanket and replied, "Because my butt is sore."

Mark burst into infectious laughter. Victor grinned and started laughing along with him. Jacob completely covered his face, red with humiliation, but also giggling softly to himself. The three of them shared the moment of levity and embraced each other again.

Survival is a constant struggle, such is the way of life, but we live for the small pleasures that life brings, and the people who make it all worthwhile.

--END--