Tonight, I Shall Seek Redemption

I had long since finished my coffee but still kept the mug in my hand, gripping it hard with tight fingers as I recalled the worst time of my life.

"I didn't have a clue who it was. When I cleaned up he was gone. Theo told me to get out - we were done. Then a few days later your father called me into his office out of the blue. I wasn't aware he even knew of me - I don't think we'd even spoken before. He told me I was going to be his new PA. I tried to argue that I had no experience, but he just stared at me with dead eyes. He said he didn't care about work - that wasn't what he had in mind. He showed me a dozen pictures from the night at Theo's and told me that was the experience he wanted me for. I was mortified and when I refused, he told me the passwords to three of my social media accounts. He threatened to break me, destroy me and trash my reputation if I didn't comply."

Luke put a hand to his eyes. "Fuck, Jae - I knew he was bad, but..." He seemed close to tears. Oh, Jae, I am so sorry."

I took his hand. "It's not for you to apologise, but thanks all the same. So, you see - I really had no choice. I suppose doing the things I do, I leave myself open, but I never imagined anyone could be so malicious. I didn't run off to Thailand with him - I was dragged."

"Why did he beat you so badly for being with someone?"

I shuddered at the thought, but telling it was cathartic. "The drugs he started taking were a factor, for sure. He was fine with me being with others when they used and abused me, but God forbid I should do something on my own. He had been off for days on a bender and I hadn't seen hide nor hair of him - much to my relief - so I took a gamble. He came storming in and kicked the girl out, then started on me. I'm pretty sure that if he hadn't gone into that tree, I'd be the one on the other side of the veil right now - or as I said last night, using junk and selling myself."

"Why all that over one girl?"

I often recalled my nights with Jasmine and wished I could do it over again. "She was his favourite of the little harem he had built up. When I tell you what I was doing when he walked in, you may get some idea of what was going on."

"What was it, Jae?"

I almost cried as I told him. "One of the best moments of my life turned to ashes in an instant. I was sucking her cock, Luke. She was quite simply the most beautiful girl I have ever set eyes on, and I was sucking her cock. It was unreal, surreal and it was magical."

I let out an involuntary sob. "And Sebastian Turner nearly fucking killed me for it."

He looked shocked. "A T-girl?"

"In one."

"Oh fuck, Jae. Did he go with them too?"

"Frequently. Don't tell me - it's another thing of yours, isn't it?"

He nodded. "My calendar - November. It's on my bucket list."

I smiled at the memory. "Still on mine too. Maybe we can lay some more ghosts somewhere down the line, eh? Maybe I can look her up. I still think of her a lot." I shivered. "I told one of the other girls in our group she was to die for..."

Grasping the import of my remark, he came around the table and gave me a huge hug. "Glad you didn't, Jae."

I hugged him close. "As you're here, there's one more thing. Something else you need to see."

I lifted my long hair, still damp from the shower, and turned away from him. I saw the look of puzzlement on his face.

"Erm, I'd have preferred a hummingbird or another butterfly like the one on your tummy. Why a solid black rectangle?"

I let my hair fall over my shoulder so the tattoo on the base of my neck was still visible. "It wasn't always a black rectangle, Luke. For a long time, it was a bar-code - a real one - and if you scanned it, it would tell you that I was the property of Sebastian Turner. As soon as I could, I had it blacked out. Maybe someday, I'll have it removed and put something nicer there."

He was close to tears again. "Thank God the bastard hit that tree."

He returned to his seat and I sat back, trying to erase Jasmine and Sebastian from my thoughts. "So, that's the sad little tale in all its gory glory. He left me the money to hurt you and your mother. I'll pay the rest back now we've met."

"No, keep it Jae. He made life hell for you,"

"I can't, Luke. I told you yesterday. It's tainted."

"Ok, I understand. Then leave it accruing interest until I can think of what to do with it. Now, as you've been brutally honest with me, can I be honest with you?"

I was puzzled but intrigued. "Yeah, go on..."

He ran a hand across his face. "The things we did last night and the things we talked about doing later. You were - and will be - the first girl to do those things to me because you want to."

I felt ice in my veins. "Luke you said... oh, fuck you haven't forced girls do that, have you?"

He lowered his head. "No, Jae - I could never even ask them, let alone force them. I pay them to do it. Well, one of them anyway. The other two satisfy different, slightly more... normal urges." He looked up. "You're only the third girl I've slept with that I didn't give money to."

I couldn't resist a little barb but laughed as I said it. "So you do like fucking whores then?"

He smiled ruefully. "Touché. I deserved that."

"Yes, you did. Why am I only the third? Because of the things you like to do?"

"Possibly. Probably. Most likely."

"You don't have to pay anymore, Luke. Thank you for telling me. Whatever you do with those ladies has stood you in good stead. You were bloody good last night and I can't wait for more."

Relieved we had got things out in the open and cleared the air, it was time to lighten the mood, and I had just the thing. "Now, since we've had our serious talk, shall I run my little plan by you?"

He brightened up. "Yes please!"

"Ok, I have nothing to be back in London for until my next check-up early next week. I haven't even considered going back to work and I'm not sure if I want to. As you are sitting here shooting the breeze with me on a sunny August morning, I'd say that Mr Luke Turner doesn't have any work or pressing engagements in the offing either?"

"No, I took a gap year after Uni. Help sort out the shitstorm he left behind and do some travelling." He looked sheepish and gestured around the garden. "Didn't get very far. Those little hobbies of mine kind of took over."

"Glad they did. Well then, if it's ok with you, how's about I stick around for a few days. Get to know each other better in and out of the sack. Have some nice food and drink and generally enjoy each other's company. I saw an Asian deli in town and they had gochujang in the window. I cook a mean bibimbap and kimchi!"

His smile lit up the morning. "I'd like that. I'd like it a lot."

"Good. So first things first. I am still in the clothes I came down in yesterday. In horse-racing terms, my default ground condition is 'soft in places' - so these panties are rather fragrant. As for the rest of this attire..."

I pulled a face. "Soooo not me. I dressed down deliberately as my usual dress code would have had your tongue hanging out like a little puppy-dog's." I paused. "Hang on - youwere hanging out like a little puppy-dog. Fuck, what are you going to be like later, Luke?"

I grinned at the look on his face. "Anyway, I saw a nice little shop on my way from the station yesterday. It was late-night closing, so I'd have popped in on my way home - had I gone home."

I stood and held out a hand to him. "So, come on - you can go and have a drink in the pub we met in yesterday. I'll shop to make myself look so good you'll want to have me over a bench in the Market Square. Then we'll go and have the 'insanely hot' chicken wings at the nice American diner I also saw on my brief travels. Get my lips and tongue burning and tingly so when I torture you tonight, it will be all the more uncomfortable!"

I smiled sweetly. "Sound like a plan?"

He pulled me across the table and kissed me. "A perfect one, Miss Park."

We snuggled together on the train journey, a pretty ten minute run along a winding river. I had come that way the day before and already loved the countryside around the place. I liked the feel of the local town and what I had seen of the little village he lived in I knew I would get to like that too. I had lived all my life in London. Somehow, this part of the world just resonated with me.

Tearing myself away from the bucolic view, I gave him a sly smile and kept my voice down.

"So, what have you got that I can tie you up with then?"

He thought for a moment. "Not sure really."

"Silk ties - they're good."

"No, never wear ties and we burned all my father's clothes on Bonfire Night."

"Don't worry, I'll buy some in town. Doubt I'll find a shop selling strap-ons though, will I?"

"Unlikely, though I do have a few instruments that are usually associated with female enjoyment."

I let out a little squeal of excitement that drew looks from other passengers. "Ooh, good lad. What you got?"

He put his finger to my lips. "Wait and see, but I'm sure you'll make good use of them. I mean, I have to practice somehow!"

Then his face lit up as if something momentous had just occurred to him. "Hmm - hold fire on the ties until after lunch. Don't ask any questions, but leave it with me, got it?"

It sounded intriguing. "Got it."

I left him at the top of the High Street. "So, twelve-twenty now. Say one o'clock? The Griffin, wasn't it?"

He pointed down the High Street. "Just down there, two hundred yards on the right. See you later... girlfriend?"

It sounded nice. "Yeah, see ya... boyfriend!" It also sounded good.

In the end I was fifteen minutes late, but there was a very good reason. The shop was an Aladdin's Cave and the stuff in the window was only the tip of the iceberg. It was called 'Pixie's Box of Tricks' and was run by a gum-chewing, bored-looking Goth girl. She barely glanced up when I entered.

"Hiya, quiet today so take yer time. See anyfing you like, giz a shout."

By the time I had given her half a dozen shouts, she was looking less bored and I was pretty certain I had a new admirer. I had a pile of tops and leggings - most of them sleek and shiny - and a few pairs of lacy knickers and bras. I kept my dirty panties for later. They were ripe and I had a very good use planned for them.

When I chose my last two items, I knew they were the things I wanted Luke to see me in, so I asked her to bin my old t-shirt and jeans and kept them on.

As she helped remove the tags, she made sure I was fully aware of her feelings for me. She tugged on the waistband of my shiny, black leather-look leggings to try and reach the last tag and her long black hair, streaked with blue, fell across her face. When she smiled up at me, it transformed her and I felt a little lurch down below at the sight of her electric-blue lips. If I wasn't meeting Luke, I'd be in like a fucking shot.

She gave my bottom a little pat as she rose, holding up the security tag. "Got the fucker!" She walked close by me to get to the till. She reeked of patchouli and made sure her leather-clad thigh brushed hard against me.

The urge to slide my hand under that short skirt was almost overwhelming. Instead, ran my hands across her buttocks, relishing the feel of the leather beneath my fingers. I quickly took them away and put them behind my back, staring off into space, miming whistling.

Her head snapped round. "Was that you, madam?"

"Was that me what?"

"Hands. Arse. Squeeze."

"No not me."

She gave me her smile. "I'm most offended, madam. I never asked yer to... stop."

She winked and went behind the till. "Nice little collection there. I'll keep an eye out for yer around town."

I was deliberately non-committal. "Sorry, just passing through."

She began to ring the items through. "Thought I'd not seen ya before. Would have remembered, like."

I shrugged. "Never know, my new guy lives here. May be back if it all works out. May just pop in if I'm passing."

"Lucky guy."

I punched my pin number into the machine. "Oh, he is. But don't worry - there are a few lucky girls around too."

She raised an eyebrow. "I bet..." She ran a hand across my bare midriff. "Love that top. Off the shoulder, puff-sleeves, belly button showing." She touched my butterfly tattoo with a black-painted fingernail. "Classy. Red suits ya. Like the boots too."

She blew a bubble and popped it, looking me up and down with approval. "In fact you just look fucking lush."

I had wanted full-length boots, but it was a hot day and I had at least twenty pairs at home. As my friend Saoirse had once said, I only had two legs - I wasn't a fucking centipede. I had settled on a pair of ox-blood ankle boots. They'd still look great when my legs dangled over his shoulders later and the heels would make a nice little mark when I dug them in.

She looked at my credit card. "Jae Hwa, eh? Nice and exotic. Like a bit of Asian pussy. Bet it tastes all musky, dunnit?"

I took my receipt. "Only half-Asian, I'm afraid. But yes - it does."

I still had my panties in my shoulder bag. I held them out to her and she inhaled.

"Fuck lady, you are one hot bitch."

I scrunched up the damp, aromatic sliver of silk and tucked it back in my bag for later use. "Maybe next time you can show me your of box of tricks, Pixie?"

It was her turn to act non-committedly. "Maybe. I usually close up between one and two. I'm so forgetful, I quite often leave ladies in the changing rooms over there by mistake. It don't half take it outta me rescuing them."

She glanced at the clock over the sales desk. "In fact, you've made me late today, but the amount you've spent, I forgive ya. Maybe a little rumble in Changing Room Two before you go and turn yer man to jelly?"

"I'd love to. Another time maybe?"

"Yeah, they all say that. See ya Jae Hwa. In my fucking dreams."

I put my hand in her thick hair and pulled her towards me. "How about I put down a deposit?" I closed my mouth on her blue lips and sucked on her lip ring. Her hands slid across my buttocks and she ground against me. I held her for thirty seconds before I reluctantly pulled away.

She slapped my behind. "You fucking tease! Get out before I fucking drag you in there by the hair. And make sure you get that pretty arse of yours back in here sharpish, Jae Hwa. Fuck, I'm gonna have to rub one out now. Changing Room Two here I come!"

Grinning, I left the girl to her lunchtime diversion.

As I closed the door, I heard a voice behind me. "Welcome to Amberdown, Jae Hwa. It don't look much, but fuck me girl, you'll be right at home here!"

I stopped and looked back. "I feel at home already."

"Good girl. Try the cake shop n'all - Confection Confidential on the Square. Tell Izzy that Pixie sent ya. Fuck, the thought o'you two goin' at it!"

She closed the door and I could hear her through the glass. "Right, wank time!"

I walked to the pub via Cloud Nine and a luggage shop to buy an overnight bag for my new wardrobe.

Luke was sitting with his back to me in the pub garden. He was just about to drain his glass when I ran a long finger across his broad shoulder and sat down opposite him. He almost choked on his beer.

I deadpanned when I saw his reaction. I had put my hair up when I was in the changing room so that it hung down around my face in spikes. I had also removed my rapidly drying contact lenses and put on my glasses, large and black rimmed. Luke reminded me of a grounded fish; his mouth open and working but nothing coming out.

I looked around. "Sorry, is this seat taken or something?"

He blurted out the words. "Yes, pretty girl - black t-shirt, jeans. Supposed to meet her but she's late. Didn't see her out there by any chance?"

I grinned. "Oh, my twin sister? Said she had to be somewhere else and sent me instead. She's a bit shy and reserved - you'll be better off with me. Much more fun and much, much naughtier!"

He shook his head. "Fuck, Jae - just over twenty-four hours ago, I sat down opposite you over there and you were utterly spectacular. But bloody hell - that is just sheer perfection. I don't think I'll make it to the Market Square. Bend over this table now!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Luke, thank you for the compliments, but restrain yourself." I considered for a moment. "No, restraint is my job. So be patient. And Luke..."

"Yes, Jae."

"Shut the fuck up and go and buy me a beer. I'm fucking gagging."

It felt so good to be me again, sitting in the sunshine garnering looks once more, the way it used to be before I met Sebastian Turner. As a treat for Luke, I was smoking when he came back with the drinks.

He set them down. "Oh Lord, can someone just warp this table into my back garden?"

It took until our second drink for the conversation to return to something approaching normal. By the time we were done, I was starving.

"Ok, so if I'm going to be in a fit state to deconstruct and rebuild you this evening, I need lots of protein and those chicken wings are calling to me."

He glanced at his watch and looked around the garden.

"Got somewhere to be?"

"Erm, no. Just fancied another drink, that's all. Route 66 will be busy - usually is until after two. Might be easier to get a table then."

He was up to something so I let it ride. I switched to wine and the conversation flowed as the lunchtime buzz died down. I was amazed at how well we got on, considering the traumatic circumstances in which we had met.

We were almost finished when I looked up and saw a tall, striking woman with ash-blonde hair gazing around the garden from the entrance to the pub. Her eyes alighted on Luke's back and she walked towards us.

She exuded sexuality and had a knowing smile on her face as she put a hand on Luke's shoulder. He took the canvas bag she offered him with a relieved look on his face.

"Thanks, I owe you."

She raised an eyebrow. "Oh, you do Luke. You most certainly do."

She looked at me long and hard and I resisted the urge to say anything, matching her stare. Finally, she turned to look at him once more, pointing in my direction.

"I don't know how you made her, but I want the recipe." She shot me a smouldering look. "Not been into girls for all that long but - fuck me!"

She whispered something in Luke's ear and turned to go. "Have fun." She waggled her fingers at us and walked off singing under her breath. It was 'Children behave,' the opening line from 'I Think We're Alone Now.'

For once, I was almost speechless. "Who the fuck was that? What the fuck's in the bag and what the fuck did she whisper in your ear?"

He took a deep breath, his voice low. "I only know her as Scarlett. She is the lady I pay a lot of money to do those things to me. I'll show you what's in the bag in the restaurant, but only if we get a booth."

"And the third thing?"

"Oh, erm that. Nothing really."

"Luke!" I leaned forward. "Be a shame if I headed on a train in the other direction from you after lunch, would it not? What... did... she... say?"

"Ok, but in the restaurant as well, yeah?"

Luckily, we got a booth. When the waitress had taken our drinks order he held the mouth of the bag open beneath the table and my heart skipped a beat as I saw the unmistakable leather straps and twin dildoes of a strap-on. By my standards, it was a tiddler, but he was still learning so I forgave him. I was already looking forward to the thrill of tightening those straps, buckling up and feeling the long thin phallus slide inside me. My favourite also had a butt plug, but this would do very nicely.

I took his hand. "Good boy, Luke. Very resourceful! I'll make sure it gets put to very good use. Now, what did she whisper in your little shell-like as she left."

"Erm, she told me what the payment would be."

I had a feeling what was coming. "And?"