All Comments on 'Truth or Dare'

Very well written. I had no problem imagining the setting and their actions. Again well done, look forward to some more.

I enjoyed your realistic story. Look forward to seeing more.

Greg

rightside_driver@yahoo.com

Chapter , soon please!

I enjoyed this as a 4 star story. One typo, “she KEELED” , where you dropped the N.

But, the grammar issue is the past tense of KNEEL is KNELT.

Don’t feel badly, apparently no other Literotica author seems to know this either.

I’m looking forward to part 2. Keep writing.

This could use a part 2.

The story is overall well written, especially for a first attempt. Keep writing! But -

But it's sad to see that I as a German have to tell you that you're in dire need of a proofreader.

The number of grammar errors is nearly overwhelming. You left out words, misspelled words etc. There are too many errors to enumerate them in this comment.

Two things could improve your writing immediately:

1) Stop using digits, instead spell numbers out. Don't say "8 miles", instead write "eight miles". Switching between numbers and words makes readers top in their reading flow. There are few exemptions from this rule like years, times and bra sizes :-) Especially the "5ft 1in" and similar thinks look horrible. Did you measure it? What about using words like "tall" or "medium height"?

2) Before the closing quote in direct speech there is ALWAYS a punctuation mark. If it's not a question or exclamation mark, it's a period or comma. Use the comma, if you continue with something like "he said", "she cried" Use the period if the sentence is finished and you start a new sentence after the qoute.

It's a nice storyl, but you need an editor. The spelling is, to say it mildley, interessting. When I as a non native speaker notice, then something is amiss. For example you change at least once from a third to a first person narrator midsentence.

But don't let this critique stop you from writing, I liked it.

Great story idea, but I agree, you need an editor. As an editor I see these mistakes all the time. Don't feel bad, English is one of the hardest languages to master. Let me know if I can help.