Unity and Destiny Pt. 01

Jacob sighed. "Not that she ever mentioned, but who knows. She lived such a prodigiously long life, and she only ever told me bits and pieces. I always thought we would have more time later, when I was less busy."

"I miss her too," said Esther. "All the time. Thank you so much for coming, Jacob, and for giving Selena some advice."

"Of course," said Jacob. "Glad to help. Tell me, Esther, are you all right?"

Esther shook her head. "Not entirely. I'm finding it extremely difficult to progress with my abilities, and my concentration is not what I'd like. So many things just beyond my senses. It's frustrating."

Jacob nodded slowly. "Be patient," he said. "Remember again how long Abuela had to sharpen her mind. She had faith in you, Esther, and so do I, but it is a terribly long road you've chosen. Remember to take care of yourself as you travel it."

* * *

*pulse*

A woman, mumbling under her breath. Light brown skin, a ripple of lighter spots on her shoulder. She sat on the lap of a much younger man,

*pulse*

his penis erect, pressing into her thigh as he rocked, eyes closed, his back against a smaller woman who pressed her hand into the thatch of hair between her legs, in, out, in, all to the

*pulse*

her own body shaking, her fingers sliding over a strangely rounded stomach, into a patch of hair, finding their sure way to a small, hard nub. An electric shock went through her, and she touched it again, her clitoris throbbing

*pulse*

Something big brushed against her, and she realized it was a man's penis, larger than she expected. It pressed against her entrance, and she grunted, then gasped, because she stretched, impossibly. She was so wet, and the penis pushed in, and in, and in, as if her body were a deep cavern, eagerly accepting this offering, squeezing and rippling around its length with an ecstasy that was and wasn't her own. But their attention was already moving forward, to that space in between the

*pulse*

Someone was having an orgasm, or they all were. There was soundless music, light from the glowing tableau they all reached for. Images, fragmented, but becoming clearer

*pulse*

as their senses overlapped, and Esther reached with them, because there was something so right about all of it, the rhythm and unity filling her in the way sex never could, because in this realm

*pulse*

she wasn't broken, but glorious, and her mind could add so much to this groping in the dark, as an old man opened his clouded eyes and began to turn towards—

———-

Esther sucked in a breath, grasping desperately and finding only a sheet bunched in her hands. Javier shifted slightly next to her, his breath steady.

Another nightmare. As usual, she couldn't remember why it was so terrifying, but she'd held more of this one in her mind. Her body trembled with sexual excitement, vague memories of bodies and smells. There was a woman's taste in her mouth, and it wasn't Nicola. She shivered and reached down, finding herself damp. She ran her finger lightly around the smooth skin, probing her shallow, featureless opening. Her familiar body, for a moment slightly unfamiliar. She tried to shake off the odd sense of loss.

She didn't remember Abuela there. No one seemed familiar, but the details were so hazy. Maybe it was a long time ago.

The Watch was steady. In fact, she felt clearheaded, almost ebullient. Esther let her mind wander Abuela's map, and it was easy, the way it should be. She'd found her path back to her abilities, in this strange memory of Abuela's. She wasn't sleepy anymore, but that was all right. She'd gotten over the hump. Everything else would be easier now.

* * *

Nicola's project had moved out behind the storage shed. She seemed to be building an addition of sorts, with a wooden floor and the beginnings of a lean-to roof against the outer wall of the shed. She'd ignored Javier's offer to help her carry over the lumber and other supplies.

Selena wandered over to watch.

"You're skilled at that," she said eventually. "More storage space?"

Nicola hammered another nail, then expertly set in place the next board.

"No," she said. "Extra space. Sleeping platform, though without heat, it won't be too useful except in summer. Hope you don't mind sleeping rough. We've got sleeping bags, at least."

Selena took a long time to reply.

"Thank you, Nicola. I'm sorry I didn't realize what you were doing all this time. It will be perfect."

Nicola sighed and expertly banged in the next nail. But it was clear that a truce had been declared.

* * *

"Time for our session, then?" Nicola asked.

"Oh," Esther said. "Already! Sure, I guess."

Nicola glanced at Javier, and he swallowed, nodding.

"OK if Javier comes along? Will that be distracting?"

Esther smiled distantly. "No, I don't see why. I guess our cabin makes sense, then?"

Javier stared at her. Somehow he'd have expected more of a reaction. But maybe she'd already talked with Nicola about this. Anyway, she seemed pretty relaxed today, if distractible.

Javier followed them in, picking the chair in the corner where he'd be out of the way. He retrieved a book, so they didn't have to feel like he was staring at them.

"Great," Nicola said. "All new things to practice with."

Nicola picked a padded stool and then reached for the nearest wooden sculpture.

"No!" Esther blurted. "Don't touch that one."

Nicola raised her eyebrows, but she set it aside, choosing a different one. Esther nodded and stood behind her, grasping her just below her breasts.

Then they were silent. Javier watched them for a while, but whatever was happening was all inside those tremendous brains. Nothing he could ever be a part of. Usually that didn't bother him so much.

Javier looked up at a soft noise. Nicola was smiling, though her eyes were closed. He could just discern the haunting melody she was humming.

Esther's chin rested on Nicola's head now, but otherwise little had changed.

A half hour later, Nicola gave a deep, satisfied sigh. She opened her eyes and gave an absent caress to Esther's cheek, a gesture that said volumes about whatever they'd just shared.

"Less afraid every time," Nicola said. "Maybe by the end of the summer, I'll be able to do it."

"I hope so," said Esther.

Nicola glanced at Javier, and he couldn't help but smile. She rarely looked so honestly happy. Esther looked content as well, though still distracted.

"On the bed, then?" Esther asked. She pulled off her shirt and then seemed to notice Javier. But all she did was give him a sweet smile, before reaching back to undo her bra.

Nicola followed right along, and she immediately grabbed his attention. Esther was beautiful. But so was Nicola, and he'd never really felt permission to look.

She didn't make a striptease of it, but she didn't do anything to hide herself either. Javier was embarrassed by the strength of reaction he had to her body. He shifted slightly in his seat, watching as Nicola sat down behind Esther on the bed, legs wide open. She'd even turned slightly, giving Javier a good side view of both women.

For a while it didn't seem so different from their previous meditation. But Javier recognized the arousal in Esther's body. The deepening blue of her freckles and nipples. The very slight flush on her face.

Eventually Esther smiled and opened her eyes. Javier blinked. She definitely hadn't had an orgasm. The whole thing was much tamer than he'd expected.

Nicola opened her eyes as well. "You're done?" she asked. "I didn't realize—"

"It was good, Nicola," said Esther. "Everything's easier today. But I don't mind if you want to finish like usual."

Esther got up and then sat completely naked in her usual chair. She retrieved her favorite sculpture and closed her eyes again.

Nicola sat with her legs open, watching Esther with some confusion. Javier figured this wasn't their usual pattern. But then she turned back to him, and moved her hand deliberately between her legs.

Javier knew his mouth was hanging stupidly. He glanced at Esther, but she seemed blissfully unaware of the two of them. If anything, she looked even more aroused now, all on her own.

The freckles on Nicola's thigh had deepened in color, and Nicola used one hand to brush herself there gently. With her other hand she held her vulva open, as if showing it to Javier. But no, she was squeezing her clit between two fingers. Javier couldn't help but think of Samantha. Nicola moved her other hand higher, and then quickly plunged two fingers inside herself. In and out, a furious fucking motion. He imagined his dick in their place. Fucking Nicola, even as Esther looked on.

When he looked up, Nicola was staring right at him.

"You can join me, if you want," she said softly.

He looked at Esther, but she was still zoned out in her meditation.

"Let me put it this way," said Nicola, breathing faster. "I would really love it if you'd whip out your cock right now. We both know Esther won't mind."

Nicola was right. Who was he kidding, anyway? She knew what he looked like. Nicola spied on everyone. She'd probably even watched him masturbating.

And Javier was overflowing with frustration and horniness. Quickly, he pulled down his pants and underwear. Nicola nodded, opening her mouth wider. As though imagining his dick between her lips.

A few minutes was all it took. Nicola sped up her pace, probably sensing what was coming, and then Javier groaned and erupted with all the force of his sexual frustration. Nicola caught his eyes and watched him the whole time, even as the last pulses diminished to nothing. And so Javier returned the favor, holding her eyes through her much longer orgasm, until Nicola heaved a sigh, licking her fingers.

"Well, fuck," Nicola said with a chuckle. Esther was still deep in her own meditation. For some reason Javier didn't feel as much awkwardness he'd expected. Esther was right. Maybe they just needed to be creative sometimes, so Esther could feel more relaxed. She certainly seemed that now. He wanted to go kneel between her legs, but he knew that would interrupt her concentration. Maybe later, though.

Nicola had quietly gotten herself up, and was getting dressed.

"You don't have to go right away," Javier said. Maybe there was more they could do. She'd looked pretty interested in his body. He could already feel himself stirring as he thought about her warm, tight pussy.

"This is your time," Nicola said softly, looking at Esther. "But that was a lot of fun. I sure don't mind if it happens again."

After Nicola left, Javier settled by Esther's feet, watching her. She seemed to be very lightly rubbing her chest against the sculpture. It was weird, but that was Esther for you. She moved slightly, her legs opening fractionally, and suddenly he realized what was coming.

"Yes," Esther said distinctly. "I can almost see—"

She began to shake with the strength of the orgasm, just a few noises escaping her closed mouth. Javier wanted to hold her, to lick her, to fuck her. Anything. But this time was so important for her to understand her abilities.

When she finally finished, she seemed to be coming out of her trance.

"Javier?" she asked slowly. "What—?"

"You were pretty deep in that meditation," he said, smiling. "But it looked nice."

"It was," she said, starting to smile. But her brows furrowed with something.

"You said you could almost see," he said. "Are you making progress?"

"Yes," she said, looking off in the distance. "Yes, I am. It's annoying that I can't remember it all, but I get more every time. And you and Nicola—oh, good. I'm glad that worked. Everything will be just fine."

Javier walked over and leaned over to hug her. To his surprise, she took hold of his cock.

"I love you," she said, leaning to take him in her mouth. He groaned as her tongue danced against him, his erection quickly growing again. Suddenly this was so easy for her. No sign of stress. It didn't feel like the old Esther coming back, but rather a new side of her.

That was all right. People changed. Esther, maybe more than most. He still loved her more than anyone.

* * *

"Good work, Selena," said Esther. "Now go and practice that one by yourself."

Selena groaned, preparing herself for the noisy world outside the cabin. But she was making progress. She was extremely disciplined about all of her practice.

Esther liked these times with Selena. Keeping them isolated from the world outside was simple, and it gave her uninterrupted time to work on the riddle of the visions.

Her dreams differed somewhat from the episodes associated with the sculpture. Perhaps her dreaming mind injected its own fears into the memories Abuela had left behind. There was sometimes a sense of immediacy and horror when she woke up, and pieces she couldn't grasp. And there were other differences, too. The sense of place was so much clearer with the sculpture. She could almost feel where it was. And the characters weren't quite the same. Some of those from the sculpture never appeared in her dreams.

She had names for them, ones that embarrassed her, but she couldn't un-think them. Fire Woman. Strong Thighs. Young Blonde Man With Firm Butt. Heavy Breasts With Freckles. Big Penis. Sexy Moans. And of course, Old Man.

None of them was Abuela, not even a younger Abuela. Maybe Esther was taking Abuela's place in the visions. Certainly the characters were doing things to her sometimes. But Esther was starting to think these were visions Abuela herself had only had from afar. She wasn't quite sure what that meant. What she did understand was this group of Changed had been using their abilities together to see—something. Those visions were the entire point, and the physical contact was just a vehicle for it. She was starting to wonder if this group had been attempting to do together what Abuela had done on her own.

The thought was intoxicating. Esther knew somehow she was stronger than all of these individuals, but that didn't mean anything if she didn't understand how to use her power. And these people, if they still lived, knew things that she didn't. Even the incidental exposure to their minds was helping her with her abilities. Anyway, she could hardly forget the sex. Without thinking about it too much, she pulled her pants down, reaching to play with herself. It wasn't the same, of course. But if she could get her head in that space, maybe it was what she needed. If only she could remember the visions they were reaching for. Her hand moved from between her legs, back to the sculpture. She needed to focus.

Some time later, Esther sensed that Nicola was approaching, and she tried to put on the right face. She didn't want to be interrupted, truly, but that wouldn't be polite. When the knock came, she called out cheerily enough.

"Hi, Esther," Nicola said, her eyes glancing down to take in Esther's state of undress. She'd forgotten about that. "Sorry, I'm not interrupting, I hope?"

"No, it's fine," said Esther. "I know I seem distracted a lot, but it's good, really."

Nicola paused. "Are you starting to reach the otherspace again? You seem to be so much more comfortable."

"No, but it's all right. I've found a different path."

"Really," said Nicola, squinting in confusion. "How is that?"

Esther smiled. "Just a different way of getting into my meditations. I'm sure everything else will come in time."

"All right," she said uncomfortably. "You know, that's kind of why I came. I don't feel like I'm helping you very much with your meditations anymore."

Esther shook her head. "No, that's fine. Javier likes it so much."

Nicola paused for a long time, so Esther thought about the last piece of the vision. Something so familiar. The trees.

"Esther, if you're truly only doing this to give Javier an excuse to watch me, then we should really be more honest about it. Don't you think?"

Esther started. "Oh. You mean, the two of you should just meet on your own. You're right, that makes sense. You two have something nice together. I didn't mean to make things awkward."

Nicola looked shocked by that for some reason, but Esther didn't always understand her reactions to things.

"Are you sure everything's all right, Esther?"

Esther nodded and smiled, because she couldn't think of any other response. She was all right, wasn't she?

Eventually the other woman left her alone. She vaguely understood Nicola had gone to find Javier. That was good. Javier needed someone who wasn't as distracted as she was. He and Esther were having sex again, but Javier never seemed as satisfied as she remembered him being. Always so worried about her, whether she was enjoying herself. But really, it was nice enough.

* * *

"I don't know either," said Javier. "She doesn't think anything's wrong, but—"

"It's like she's high on something," said Nicola. "How the hell could her abilities do that? Javier, she would *never* be so disengaged about anything having to do with you. Maybe you're blaming yourself for something, but I'm telling you, from the outside, there's something fucked up here."

Javier nervously glanced back towards their cabin. No way around it: Esther could hear them if she paid the slightest attention. But this was important. He looked at Nicola and blushed, remembering yesterday. It felt like the two of them were circling closer and closer together. Even if it was just watching. And he felt so helpless, because he knew some of that attraction was a defense against whatever was going on with Esther.

Their conversation didn't seem to be going anywhere, and sometime later Esther joined them, showing no sign of having heard anything they said.

"Kat's coming up," she said. "She'll be here in forty minutes."

"What?!" Javier yelped. "Why didn't she e-mail first? And you only just noticed?"

"I'm sorry, Javier," she said, looking chagrined. "I'm so distracted. I knew she was coming this direction, but I wasn't sure she was coming here. And she seemed fine, so I wasn't worrying. Should we get dinner started, then?"

Javier rushed to help her. It should have been quiet companionship. But Nicola was absolutely right. Esther seemed happy enough, but it wasn't just distraction. Even during sex, it was as though she wasn't entirely present.

And now Kat was coming for some reason. He'd assumed all was well with her, but they hadn't talked as much as he'd intended. She'd e-mailed him some programming stuff a week ago.

Selena arrived and insisted on helping with dinner, so Javier left the crowded kitchen to wait for Kat. Eventually Mark joined him.

"Do you know why Nicola is upset?" he asked.

"It's Esther," Javier responded, feeling guilty. He wasn't sure what, if anything, Nicola had told Mark. About Esther, or him for that matter. But Mark nodded.

"Yes," he said. "There is something troubling her. I think perhaps she hasn't been exercising enough."

Javier smiled. Mark might be right, at that. He should encourage Esther to get away from the camp more. She'd been talking about doing just that at the start of the summer. What had changed, anyway?

Mark turned to look down the driveway, and soon enough Kat's car came bumping up the road. She wedged it halfway on the grass next to the full lot, and with a groan she slid out to meet them.

"Hey Mark. Javier."

Javier walked up to give her a hug, and she collapsed into his arms.

"Oh, fuck," she said. "I wasn't going to do this."

"Maybe it's the elevation," Javier said, and she coughed.

"Or the trees. I fucking hate trees. Oh, God, Javier, what a mess I am. I can't believe I just came out here. And then I almost couldn't find it. You should put up signs."

"Yeah, that would make it an extra-special secret hideout."

Kat wiped her nose and pulled away from him.