All Comments on 'Untying the Camel'

Wonderfully atmospheric, it was great to find the story was as deep and textured as it was, with the NC and humiliation aspects nicely woven in. I wonder if Kanikay might have more adventures on the steppes with her band of loyal horsemen, her newly acquired household drudge and mares. It was also great to have that little spark of empowerment after the humiliation. Beautifully judged story creation . Thank You

Sara

Thank you Sara, I really appreciate the comment!

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I think it's definitely conceivable Kanikay will have more adventures. I have a few vague thoughts on the larger Sarambai epic. However, the poetry version of 'Untying the Camel' (which, as of this writing, has yet to post to the site) required MASSIVE effort, so it's hard to imagine mustering up the strength to take THAT part on again.

Fantastic!!!!!

Fantastic. The link to the original poem seems to be broken btw.

Thank you Grendelpuppy!

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Also, I'll take this opportunity to plug the poetic version of the story, which is now live:

https://literotica.com/p/untying-the-camel-verse

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If you really want to imagine what it is like when a Tashli bard performs this tale at some communal holiday or festival, it would be in verse rather than prose. ;)

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I am partway through publishing an audio reading of the verse in several installments as well.

Thank you walden69!

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I was hoping the prose and poetic versions could be simul-published and cross-linked. But, we are just small cogs in the literotica machine. So, yes, the link was broken - but I think it's good now.

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https://literotica.com/p/untying-the-camel-verse

I attempted to Google "Harbalistan.". The only returns are for "herbalist.". Is this a real tribe or region or just fictitious?

Maybe not an error, but most Muslims practice circumcision

Once again, I am immensely impressed. The depiction of the woman enduring the degradation of being raped as she continues her valiant struggle to win the contest is fantastic. The fact that some men follow her attests to her regaining their respect.

Thank you for the comments Grendelpuppy! Great question re: circumcision. I think the key is that this must be quite an old story. I've noted oblique references to this tale going back to the mid-19th c., and it's certainly a good deal older than that. In earlier times, the adoption of Islamic practices in Central Asia was definitely uneven and spotty. But it is fascinating to think that this detail was preserved through generations of oral transmission, despite changing conventions. Today circumcision would indeed be ubiquitous in Harbalistan.

Perhaps the lack of circumcision is accurate for this particular Muslim peoples. The rates in various islamic countries are not consistent. I still have not been able to google these peoples, but it seems that they are on the high Tibetan plain. The low air pressure would result in a much higher risk of uncontrolled bleeding:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prevalence_of_circumcision

Yes, you won't find Harbalistan or the Tashlis. I was being coy, they are made up. However you got the geography about right Grendelpuppy.

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What IS true is that Central Asian epic literature can be quite risque (including fairly frank acknowledgement of the risks and practicalities of female abduction). And the canon does contain an 'untying the camel' scene - I did not invent that. Moreover, that scene is wildly graphic. It is not an NC scene, and is played more for raunch than eroticism (one woman, who is older, and must of course be non-Muslim). But still, a level-up from the bed-tricks and double-entendres of Shakespeare in my opinion.

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Anyway, that's what gave me inspiration - I knew at once that I would have to reimagine the scene in a form that would get me hot. Ultimately, I became rather obsessed with what it would be like to actually hear it being performed at some communal gathering (and hence spent way too much time on versifying it...)

One hell of a tale, absolutely five stars worth. Thank you for it.

Thank you Crusader235, I'm really glad you liked it!

Truly unusual story, and a good read. Thank you for having this text/story version, which format I prefer over the poetic one. You are very talented mirafrida!

Thank you Anonymous commentator, I'm glad you liked it!

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Yes, after my experience with Hero's Tale (which, IMO, is one of my best stories but also one of my worst rated), I knew people hated verse, and I'd better provide a prose version of Camel. (Interestingly, since writing Hero's Tale, I've enjoyed reading epic verse much more than I used to, so for me I guess it was mind-expanding).

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Hero's Tale was more fun to write. It uses a strict metrical form, but does not rhyme. The poetic form of Camel was simply too much work - I definitely underestimated how time consuming it would be to write huge swaths of rhyming verse. I am tremendously proud of the end result; yet I can't help but feel stupid for working so hard on something no one wants to read. I won't do it again, but I guess I'm glad I did it once.

A great story as well as some hot erotica!! Thanks for sharing.

Incredible, amazing story. Truly original!

I keep thinking about what I loved about this story and I wanted to mention a few things. I loved that it's a NC story where the female lead is a fully realized character, and her psychology, selfhood, and pleasure are given proper attention. I love that you didn't shy away from describing the extremes of degradation and physicality and eroticism, but continued to convey character and setting really well. And as a former horsewoman myself, I love LOVE LOVE the ending. Riding away towards her future, using her power to save the other woman. It's just masterful. You should be a published author if that's something that calls to you. Just fantastic.

Thank you Honeybeeree and Adahplatha - I am grateful for your comments, and especially your detailed response Adahplatha! When writing this story, I enjoyed thinking about what this imagined nomadic culture would be like, and the different perspectives each of the characters would have (none of which would necessarily line up with our modern view of the world). Kanikay was especially fun to get to know. An appealing and strong character who was able to navigate the best of bad choices and turn them to her advantage. I liked that moment toward the end, when these rough horsemen are forced to admit to themselves that even in her degradation, Kanikay has proven herself to be the better of Nurbek. And I'm really glad to hear you liked the ending Adahplatha. I was very taken with he image of her riding off, nude and proud; but I don't have any experience with horses, so it's nice to hear that it 'worked' for someone in the know!

A lovely story mirafrida! The no holds barred, very explicit narrative of Kanikay's most public sexual defilement is exquisitely descriptive. While it made hugely enjoyable and erotic reading, I was pleased to see Kanikay remain very much defiant and her spirit unbroken after her most humiliating submission and defloration. Like many of the others I also enjoyed the ending where she rides horseback, head held high, into an uncertain but no doubt a remararkable and fulfilling future.