All Comments on 'Valiant Valkyrie vs the Boarman 05'

Solid entry, kind of a return to form. Gets back to the immediacy of your other work - the first four entries seemed to dip too often into "telling, not showing". Which is understandable, considering you were establishing a whole new background, but it just seemed rushed.

I like the themes, and the characterization of the antihero - the criminal masterminds in your other stories (with one exception, and that primarily in the Literotica rewrite) kind of have been ciphers. Interesting to see what you pull off with him in future installments.

It also seems like the camera is focusing fairly tightly on the titular (heh) heroine (as opposed to e.g. the New Years' Eve story on DBC). An interesting stylistic choice, although we miss out on some things - I'm thinking in particular of an event that was teased in Part 1 that long-time fans were really wanting to see, but apparently happened offscreen between then and Part 3, and even then it's only strongly hinted at.

Not downgrading due to (particularly in earlier Parts) the author's kink not matching mine, although the fact that it was so prevalent in Part 2-3 is a little offputting (part of the reason why I didn't comment or rate those Parts). But then there was an author on this site who wrote some of the most banging (so to speak) sex scenes around but insisted on having spankings as part of the lead-in, because that was his signature thing.

Also, there's a typo on page 4 (it's in the DBC version too) - "the Boarman's cupped head" should read "hand"...

Really, this silly Valkyrie should just learn her place and listen to Boarman. I'm sure things will be much better.

Side note: does Boarman have a current/ex-sidekick with a mimetically tight ass?

I want to read the seduction and sex scene between Boarman and Jutian pls!!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

@Shilton_Lineker: thanks, glad you are liking it more. Replying to a few specific items below:

“Not downgrading due to (particularly in earlier Parts) the author's kink not matching mine, although the fact that it was so prevalent in Part 2-3 is a little offputting (part of the reason why I didn't comment or rate those Parts). But then there was an author on this site who wrote some of the most banging (so to speak) sex scenes around but insisted on having spankings as part of the lead-in, because that was his signature thing.”

Given the second sentence, I’m guessing you are referring to spankings specifically as the kink you are not into? Yeah, I kind of only realized in retrospect how prevalent spankings and groping was in this piece. While it's certainly part of my repertoire, I don’t think I would usually consider it one of my primary kinks. It comes up so much here because of a couple of factors.

First, as you noted, this story has a very tight POV focus on Valkyrie. That is itself a choice made for a number of reasons, but most notably as a way to structure the exposition - basically we encounter the setting as Valkyrie does, whereas if I used multiple viewpoints I would need to dump even more info on the audience earlier. But this does have the side effect that we can’t jump away to a sex scene to ‘tide us over’ until Valkyrie herself gets involved in one.

The second factor, intersecting with the first, is that my usual instinct is to ‘save’ the leading heroine getting fucked until the climax of the story, more or less. This piece actually follows a fairly similar build-up to a lot of my other stories, overall, but stretched out quite a bit due to the length. Which means I have to find other things to do to her - which is why so much of the earlier portions of this story are focused on things like groping, humiliation, having her observe sexual acts happening to others and, yes, spanking.

Overall, this story is an experiment; in how to handle a longer work, among other things. I’m not going to make a heroine getting spanked a required intro for any of my stories, to address your earlier comment - although it will probably come up here and there. And if I ever do a story this long again, I don’t think I’ll make the same choices; I’ll probably either loosen up the POV and find other ways of structuring things, or figure out another way to layer in more in-focus sex scenes earlier.

That said, the aforementioned build-up phase for this piece is almost over at this point. In pretty short order we’re going to be moving into the final climactic confrontations between our principal antagonists (meaning the Boarman, the Dark Prizm, and Valkyrie); and with that the sexual content should keep ramping too. Although there will also still be another spanking or three; this story in retrospect is rather heavy with them.

A few other items:

“the criminal masterminds in your other stories (with one exception, and that primarily in the Literotica rewrite) kind of have been ciphers.”

That’s absolutely fair - and to a degree a deliberate choice, actually. My assumption is typically that the villain is going to be the primary ‘viewpoint character’ for a male reader, so I try to omit unnecessary background details and the like as I feel they might interfere with that. That said, I’m kind of curious now which of the previous villains you think is an exception. My guess would be Groxx from Zoo, who lays out his ideology pretty clearly, but I’m not certain about that.

On a similar note:

“ an event that was teased in Part 1 that long-time fans were really wanting to see, but apparently happened offscreen between then and Part 3, and even then it's only strongly hinted at.”

I’ll admit, again, I’m actually not certain which event you’re referring to here. The one that comes to mind is what gets revealed in the ultrasound room. If so, well… not to put too fine a point on it but I think your timeframe might be off in that case. Assuming comic-book-style shenanigans aren’t afoot, which to be fair I didn’t rule out. If it’s something else, I’d be curious what you’re referring to, actually.

And thanks for the head’s up on the typo. Those sorts are the most annoying, since automated checks tend to miss them easily. I’ll try to get it fixed but probably not right away, unfortunately, since my previous experience with revisions is that they clog up my queue for quite a while; so I’ll probably wait until a relatively quiet point after the entire series is out to go back and fix that kind of thing.

@Anonymous no1:

“Side note: does Boarman have a current/ex-sidekick with a mimetically tight ass?”

That’s a very good question. I assume you mean a lady sidekick, since he explicitly has both. I would probably go with Royal Flower for that; I didn’t get into her description much on her first appearance since it was already a quite busy scene. But she’s of a lithe build overall, plus her descriptions naturally tend to plant-based metaphors and ‘ass like a ripe peach’ is definitely a classic one. I can put in some language to that effect next time she appears. (Oh, and spoilers; Royal Flower appears again at least once).

@Anonymous no2: "I want to read the seduction and sex scene between Boarman and Jutian pls!!!! 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏"

I will make a note of it! Sorry, that’s about all I can promise right now, my focus for the next ~6 weeks is just getting the remaining chapters out; the existing draft is complete but I am revising as I go and that tends to absorb a surprising amount of my time. We will get a tiny bit of description of what went down later on, but I don’t want to mislead you; it’s basically just a bit of dialog about what happened, not a detailed depiction. (Assuming that bit survives revisions; which is not 100% guaranteed, there are other bits of dialog I have ended up cutting if they hurt flow too much).

I actually meant a male sidekick with a tight ass, for once. The Boarman is pretty clearly based on Batman, and Dick Grayson's ass is the subject of a lot of jokes, up to and including it being so recognizable that someone instantly figures out who he is despite some sort of face obscuring technology, purely by looking at his ass.

It was basically a joke.

Blargh! I have heard that actually, it's just not where my mind went initially. Sorry I stepped all over that.

hi, just wanted to know if your are making a Valiant Valkyrie vs the Kaiju part 2, thanks

@ladala; yes, but probably not any time soon. I have a lot of other projects I want to get out first, even discounting the current extended storyline.