We're the Millers

Ladders and Ledges

The keypad chirped and steel chocks added soft clanks. Widely spaced lights came to life on the other side of the steel framework that blocked access

"Told ya my Briggy'd come through," Gail said as she pulled the door toward her and waved the piece of paper in her other hand, "hey, Bonnie. Girlfriend."

The dirty blonde ponytail bounced around the black hood that'd been pushed back as she stood against the wall and held the door and looked over her right shoulder. She waved the paper again. The shorter woman at the rear of the procession growled in her throat as she glared out from her hood at the gap-toothed grin.

"What?"

"I promised him if the code was good," Gail said as Jed and Tommy walked past her and through the door as they carried the first piece of scaffolding, "that you'd let him stick that bit'o'horse hanging 'tween his legs up your cute butthole."

Tommy laughed as he leaned and Gail turned and they kissed quickly without slowing. Bonnie let out a vocal growl this time.

"Let 'im have your ass, Gail, you like his cock so much," Bonnie snapped. Jake huffed as he followed Tommy as he and Bonnie carried a matching piece of scaffolding.

Gail goosed Jake's ass as he passed her. "Don' worry girl, let Jakey do your mouth same time. Briggy's might reach his. Won't be in the middle."

"Shut up, both of you," Jed said in a low but firm voice from the lead, "we're on the fucking clock. Move."

Bonnie glared but faced forward as Gail pulled the door and let it set silently into place before she followed the quartet. Bonnie's shoulders tensed at the soft horse's "neigh" from Gail.

Jed led the others through a large space punctuated by vertical steel beams that held up a ceiling. Exposed pipes and ducts traced lines across the ceiling parallel and perpendicular to the quintent's advance. Boxes and crates in piles and small and large filing cabinets were left unmolested by hands, although heads turned.

"What's all this stuff?" Jake kept his voice low.

"Nothing we care about," the taller Tommy said from just in front of him, "no cash, mostly jus' the family history shit everyone tries to track back to Adam and Eve."

"Less I know 'bout my family, better," Jake said, "can't be called to testify. Didn't Jed's family come back in forty-seven?"

"Mom's side," Tommy said as they worked the two pieces of scaffolding around a corner with a left turn, "not all family branches grown straight since then."

Jake grunted as the piece of scaffolding jerked when Bonnie yelped and jumped, Gail laughed as her hands grabbed the shorter woman's ass.

"Neigh," Gail let out.

"Shut... the... fuck... up...," Jed said as he stopped in front of an oversized elevator and set his end of the scaffolding on the floor. Tommy continued and raised it to not quite vertical. Jake and Bonnie followed suit Gail let out a last, soft neigh and Bonnie growled as she balanced the scaffolding. Jed pushed the button alongside the sliding doors.

Jed looked at the watch on his wrist before he spoke. "You sure about the timing of the guards, Gail?"

"Those two watched the building last few nights," Gail pointed to Bonnie and Jake.

"Pattern of lights fit, few minutes off now and then, but never more than five," Jake said.

"Which means they're headed up the top right now," Jed said as the elevator doors opened, "just like we're gonna be. C'mon."

Tommy muscled the first piece of scaffolding into the freight elevator and angled it to fit. Bonnie let the second go as Jed hefted it and muscled it to stand next to the first.

"If we're not back in two hours, mark now, Gail, you're outta here," Jed said and she waved as the others pushed into the elevator. He pushed a button and the doors closed as Gail waved.

"Neigh," she said. Bonnie growled again as she gave a middle finger to the taller woman. Tommy laughed.

"Bonnie," Jed said as the two pairs and their equipment stopped in front of a door, its marking said 'Roof.'

He pulled a small flashlight from his pocket and shined it on the doorknob. Bonnie set herself on one knee and pulled a leather case from inside her hoodie and pulled metal picks from it. She inserted the pins and within seconds the knob turned and she nudged the door forward. She slid the pins into the case.

"You're sure there's not a safe? Doors, yeah, but I don't trust this idiot of Gail's...," Bonnie looked up at Jed as she hid the case inside her hoodie.

"He's not the one who gave me the info on the office," he said and Bonnie let out a soft 'huh', "that's from someone else. Now, move."

Jed and Tommy led the way up the stairs and stopped at a door with a push bar. Jed pulled out his flashlight and ran the beam around the frame and the bar.

"Clear," he said as put the flashlight away, "hoods up. Watch check, 12:30?"

The others shuffled and gave out assents before Jed spoke. "Good. Cover 'em. Wedge."

They all slid elastic cloth bands over their watches and secured their hoods. Tommy pulled a small wooden wedge from his pocket and leaned to hand it over. Jed nudged the door open and looked around then pushed it open and used the wedge to secure it in place.

"Move," he said in a low but firm voice. He and Tommy carried the first piece of scaffolding and turned right. Bonnie and Jake grunted as they followed, as soon as they cleared the door they stopped, Bonnie set her end down and adjusted the wedge to the door was blocked open by a few inches. Then she and Jake followed the others to the corner at two edges of the roof.

They squatted as they set the pieces of scaffolding end to end and duck walked to keep their heads below the top of the short wall

"Bonnie, watch across," Jed said.

She nodded, with the moonless night meant minimal light leaked from the streets and they were all shadows moving in shadows. She adjusted herself so her eyes rose just above the short wall that surrounded the roof.

"Dark," she said before she rose so she could see to the ground floor, "all dark."

"Keep watching," Jed said as he pulled his flashlight out, "let's go."

The others hunkered down along the scaffolding planks that were laid end to end and hidden with them behind the wall. He kept the light aimed down as Tommy and Jake slid one set of tubes that supported the side-by-side planks into sleeves mounted on the tubes on the second set. Tommy and Jake tightened screws inset in the outer sleeves.

"Still dark," Bonnie said, having again risen to get a downward view, her hood tight around her face, "they're nowhere close to the normal pattern."

Son of a bitch" Jed said.

Jake and Jed shuffled to squat around her as Tommy pulled the coiled rope over his head and secured a snapped hook into an eyebolt at that end of the scaffolding. Jed flicked the switch and his flashlight went dark.

"Bonnie huffed. "Gail's boyfriend gave us shit."

Three more heads rose above the wall. All of them scanned to the ground.

"Where we're at is as far as we can get, we'll put the planks across between those two windows," Jed said and his flashlight beam flashed once on the opposite wall, "but when."

"Shit work," Tommy said, "jes up and down, back and forth."

"But they're not going up and down, back and forth," Bonnie said.

"Or they already did, not expecting a random Tuesday break-in," Jake said. Bonnie snorted.

"Fourth window, counting the one to the left over there," Jed said with an annoyed tone.

"And no safe, right?" Bonnie's question was hard. She settled back and turned her head to face three darker spots in the darkness.

"If there's a safe, you can cut that RM's horse cock off and shove it up Gail's ass. AFTER you get it open," Jed growled.

"Did Gail's stooge fuck us? Or fuck up," Jake said, "whadda we doin' boss?"

Jed exhaled slowly as he scanned the other building before he shuffled the ten feet to the corner and scanned the parking lot.

"The desk these yoohoos sit at is that end," Jed pointed to his right, the front of the building on the busier and showier street to the east, "on the ground floor. They've either gone, or skipping this run. Let's go. Jake, rope."

Bonnie and Jake barely made out each other's face hidden in hoods and offered tight smiles.

"Yeah, boss," Jake said as they all stood slowly and he worked the rope through his hands.

Jed and Tommy both reached under their hoodies and pulled cardboard and set it on the wall. Bonnie held them in place as they backed up and extended the scaffolding over the edge as Jake played the rope out. With the last third remaining, they lowered it onto the cardboard and pushed it. The taller Tommy took the rope and raised it to guide the far end of the scaffolding so it could land on one of the ledges that extended at each floor out from the neighboring building. Another push set it tight against the opposite wall.

"Show time," Tommy said with a light tone.

"You're not the one ten floors up walking across a two foot wide scaffold," Jake growled. The taller man laughed.

"Got all your gear?" Jed's question turned all three heads. The two smallest members of the team patted pockets.

"Yeah," Jake said, "pack's under the hoodie."

"Okay, move. Jake, you first," Jed said. He and Tommy braced the makeshift bridge as Jake hefted himself up and took a deep breath. He paused as his head extended over the edge.

"Don't look down," he said as his neck craned before he rose, "go."

He walked across and stopped face first against the far wall, before he used the plentiful gaps between granite blocks for handholds. He stepped sideways onto the ledge and half turned. He gestured with his hand.

"Go," Jed said.

Bonnie huffed and Jed put his hand under her ass and helped her up where she squatted for a moment then stood. She let out a long exhale and Jake gestured with his left hand as he shuffled along the ledge. It wasn't wide enough for him to have his feet side by side, so he stood with his legs in a narrow vee.

Bonnie shrugged from her shoulders before she walked crisply, her eyes locked on the wall ahead of her. She pressed it with both hands flat and stood still before her shoulders shook.

"C'mon, babe," Jake said softly as he twisted at the waist, his right hand locked in a gap, "let's get this. Just think of the cash."

She turned her head toward him. "Fuck cash. Better be blow better'n we had at the Church after..."

"Better 'an that, promise."

She gave a mordant laugh and shuffled off the bridge and replicated Jake's shuffle along the ledge, using hands in the gaps. Bonnie glanced back when she heard the light sounds as Jed and Tommy retracted the bridge to their side. She held a deep inhale. Neither of them looked down or behind with the loss of even the illusion of the neighboring building behind them, only the edge of the parking lot they'd gazed past in the previous weeks, ten floors down.

"First window," Jake said as they glanced through the yard-wide glass gap into darkness, "two more then we're there."

Jake had just passed the second window when Bonnie hissed. "Jake!"

"Huh?"

Light!"

Jake kept his grips tight in a gap as he leaned toward her and both saw the glow through the window. At the far end of the building, brighter light shone through a window.

"Oh, fuck," he said, "what's the layout again?"

"Mostly offices along each'a these sides," Bonnie said, "elevators, stairs, janitor shit, all in the center. Couple gaps, like that window and the far ends."

"Then, 'less they lean out that window, THEY can't see us."

"Yeah. Or, shit..., this window."

Jake shuffled hard to his left. "Go go go."

Bonnie 'walked' her hands along the window sill along with her feet on the ledge as the hallway glow brightened. When she was two feet past the window she stopped, solidified her grips, Jake a step ahead of her, two feet short of the next window.

Heavily muffled laughter and incomprehensible speech was apparent as flashlight beams jabbed quickly out of the window. After a moment, silent darkness had returned. They remained still until they saw a light at the far end of the next floor down.

"Let's get to our window, but let 'em get down a couple of floors before we push in."

He led them to the fourth window, where they again froze.

"Arm's gettin' tired," Bonnie whispered.

"Me too. Yeah, hold on. Few more minutes."

At their target window, Jake continued and then spun on his toes so they were on each side of it. Jake locked his left hand in a stone gap and pulled a penlight from his pocket with his right. He shined it along the lower frame then raised it and ran the beam across the center where upper and lower panes met..

"There, stop," Bonnie said as his light was a foot from her edge. He flashed it back and found a second at the same position near him.

"Shine here," she said and she shuffled then rose on toes, "shit."

"Huh?"

"Look," her tone clearly amused. He moved the light nearer and chuckled along.

"They got two armed security guys who walk ten floors every two hours..."

"Like we just saw. And the windows may as well be paper. Where are they?"

"Dunno," Jake said as he leaned back and scanned down. A few moments later he saw them.

"Just hit seven. Let's do this."

"Gimme light," Bonnie said, "and I'll get mine, we'll switch. Won't need the glass cutter."

She pulled a flat strip of metal from her pocket, it had a notched end. She tightened her grip with her right hand and used her left to force the tool between the wooden panes and grunted as worked it.

"Can you push the lower?"

"Yeah," Jake used his shoulder against the pane.

There was a click. Bonnie laughed. "One down."

She and Jake traded tool for penlight and after a few moments a second click. Bonnie flicked the light off and she and Jake put their tools in pockets. Both pressed against the pane and pushed upward.

"Glad we got this one," Jake said, "save us going further to the second one."

Bonnie retrieved the penlight and shone it into the office.

"Damn," Jake said as they looked into the window at the five foot drop to the floor, "woulda been nice the desk was in front'a this window."

"Go to the next one? Same latches, probly."

"Fuck that, want off this ledge," Jake said as he released his grip and put both hands on the sill and hefted himself up. He leaned to get his head inside and rested with his waist on the sill before he rolled to sit on the sill.

"Watch it," he said and Bonnie shuffled away as he lifted one leg after the other over the sill and into the office. He grunted when he slid off the sill and landed with a soft thump on the floor. Both of them went still for a count of three. He walked and grabbed and chair and set it under the window as Bonnie shuffled to the center. She put her hands on the sill and bent her head and Jake grabbed her under the shoulders before she bent down and landed on the chair with her hands. She bent her arms and Jake held her waist and guided her legs as she spun and landed on the floor. She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and kissed him.

Hard.

His hands went to her ass before they broke the kiss and both shivered.

"I don't believe we just did that," she said as she hugged him, "god, if we make it outta here I am gonna so fuck you brains out..."

"If they're not smashed ten floors down," he said and both laughed and kissed again, "but, hey, how about the butt this time? Before Briggy gets it?"

"You take him up your ass, then you can have mine," Bonnie said with a tone as slow and thick as molasses, "your choice!"

She pushed away and laughed as Jake huffed and both looked around the dark room. Bonnie pulled out Jake's penlight and handed it over then worked into a different pocket and pulled her own out.

"So...," they scanned the lights around a large but relatively plain desk, three drawers on each side and a broad central drawer, a few papers piled on top.

"Shit," Bonnie said, "one, two..."

"Four fucking filing cabinets," Jake said as he bent his wrist and revealed his wrist, Bonnie followed him, "took us eight minutes to get inside, at least as long getting back. I'll check the desk, you start on the cabinets. Shouldn't be THAT hard, whoever set this up claimed not jus' pics, but also those video tapes."

"Yeah," Bonnie said as each walked quickly toward their targets, "Jake."

"Yeah?"

"Check those boxes first, maybe I won't have to deal with any locks..."

He laughed, but he opened the top box as the first filing cabinet rattled when Bonnie pulled on a drawer.

"Fuck," she said softly, but she reached and rolled the office chair and pulled out and set her pick case on it.

"Yuck," Jake said, "want a copy of the 'Articles of Faith' babe?"

"Only if I can shove it up Gail's ass," Bonnie said before the cabinet's lock clicked and turned.

"Think we're all a bit obsessed with asses tonight," Jake said as he set the top box on the floor and opened the second, "ah, hey, uh... 'Palmyra to Nauvoo: A History.' This is not what we want."

Bonnie rifled through file folders in the top drawer as Jake spoke. "Leave it, babe, just unlock everything and I'll go follow along. Just making sure nothing hidden bottom of these boxes."

"Ah, yeah," Bonnie said and she rolled the chair and grabbed her picks and set to work on the second cabinet.

"Shit books," Jake said as he hefted the first box back in place on top of the other as the second cabinet's lock clicked, "damn, you're good at that."

"Top drawer nothing," Bonnie said as Jake walked to the first cabinet and she moved to the third, "just four more. And five each of these. Fuck."

"Jed claims his mole didn't say WHERE, just that the pictures and tapes WOULD be here."

Both went silent except for hummed grunts as Jake rifled along file folders in each drawer. Bonnie unlocked the fourth cabinet and rolled the chair to the desk. The central drawer was unlocked, but offered nothing but pencils, pens and uninteresting papers. The drawers on the right side were also unlocked but held no obvious sets of photos.

Jake moved to the second cabinet as Bonnie made quick work of the lock that apparently secured the three drawers on the left of the desk. Jake was on the third drawer down when Bonnie broke their silence.

"Shit, pictures!"

"Ah?" Jake spun and walked over as Bonnie pulled a folder and opened it on the desk.

"Damn," she said. Jake scanned through as Bonnie went back the drawer.

"Wedding pictures," she said, "Temple ceremonies."

"Ain't what we want," Jake said before he sighed, "back to it."

Bonnie quickly pulled and checked each folder, but found nothing more interesting than no-doubt bitchy blondes in those long gowns and idiot RMs in the cheap suits so popular in the stupid state.

"Garments...," she muttered.

"Hey, what?"

"Pics of guys and bitches in just their garments," she said, "bit racy for the normies, but nothing like we were told."

"If any blonde babes with triple-dees, put a couple'a those aside, we'll take 'em," Jake said and Bonnie huffed.

"Maybe I can find one'a this Briggy and what he's supposed to have," she said, "maybe I'll take Gail's offer up. 'Least I'll feel his."

"Oh, ouch," Jake said with good humor, "okay, skip it."

They both went silent again as Bonnie restored the folders to the drawer.

"Ow. Damn... what order..."

"Don't worry," Jake said, "if this all goes to plan, this fucker, whoever he is, will know someone was here. Whether he'll pay up or not... well, Jed's pretty sure 'bout that."

Bonnie set the last folder and pushed the drawer closed before she retrieved her picks. "Shit, can't believe I'm locking a drawer."

Jake pushed the bottom drawer closed and grunted before he peeled back the wrist band. "Two down, bleah, gotta move it. Time."