What We Yearn For Ch. 02

What. The. Fuck.

It's all I can think as this young man drapes his long arm over my shoulders.

The man is strange, but at the same time, seems vaguely familiar.

I look at the side of his face and feel something tug at the back of my mind. I can't help but think that I've seen him somewhere before - recently, perhaps? I can't pinpoint where or when, exactly. Maybe he was a customer? Or maybe he walks around the neighborhood where the flower shop is? Or he could be-

I'm suddenly pulled from my thoughts. I feel something similar to being zapped. It takes a moment for me to realize it's the guy's thumb rubbing against my arm through the thin sweater I'm wearing. I also realize I've missed part of a conversation between him and that girl in the robe.

Thankfully - or maybe not so-thankfully, depending on how you look at it - I catch the conversation just as the girl ends a sentence with her eyes pointed to me.

"I'm sorry, can you repeat that?" I ask.

"I was apologizing," she tells me. "If I'd known Milan was taken, I wouldn't have been so bold as to make a move on him. I hope I didn't cause any issues between you two."

'Play along.'

The guy's silently-mouthed words from moments ago echo in my mind. I'm still skeptical, but he did give me a big tip; he didn't even wait for me to get here. He'd included it with the order.

"Oh, of course not," I reply with a smile. "I mean, I don't think we're that public about being together."

She nods understandingly. "I get it. A lot of girls do have their eye on him. You'd be amazed at how eager girls get when they find out someone's taken. I guess there's something about wanting someone unattainable in a world where you can have everything if you have money or good looks." She pauses as if in thought before wagging her head to the side and adding, "or both."

Both me, and the man named Milan, glance at each other. He gives me a weak smile that I'm sure he intended to be reassuring.

Instead, I feel nervous - or excited, maybe? I can feel my pulse quickening. In this moment, under his chartreuse gaze, I have an inkling as to why girls would fall over themselves to get his attention, taken or not.

He's nice to look at; I can't deny it. There's a faint tan to his warm, ivory skin, and his lips are actually rather full for someone of his ethnicity. Then again, as I look at him, I can't tell what he is exactly.

Especially with that hair.

How can I miss it? Even in its messy bun, I can see a few thick, wavy strands escape his hair tie. They start out as dark blonde at the root and base before turning a lighter shade at their coiled ends.

If 'handsome-yet-ambiguous' was a person, it'd be this guy, right here.

And maybe a little androgynous. His face was soft in some places, but broad and angular in others. While that isn't everyone's cup of tea, I actually think it works for him.

"You're a lucky girl."

Carly's voice brings me back to the present again. "A lot of girls would love to have someone so talented for a partner."

Milan...

Hearing his name aloud again pulls at my memory.. Again, I try to figure out why. But no, everything is still foggy. If I do have any memories of him from another time or place, they're buried deep.

I shrug it off, for now. I continue to play my part, since, after all, he'd requested my help.

In fact, I decide to kick it up a notch.

"He's very thoughtful too." I gesture to the flowers in my arms. "I didn't expect him to surprise me like this at work."."

"I was wondering why you had flowers! So that's what that's about!"

Carly looks at the bouquet with wide eyes. "What's the occasion?"

Jesus, she's inquisitive.

I can feel the weight of exhaustion bearing down on my shoulders.. Thinking of material on the spot is taking a lot more energy out of me than I would've thought. It also doesn't help that I've just come from work.

"It's our anniversary," Milan slides in smoothly. "Well, we've only been together for a couple of months, but it's been a great ride so far. Actually, we need to get going. I made reservations somewhere for the two of us, so..."

"Oh! Of course. I'm sorry to keep you guys! And again," she turns to me, "I'm sorry about my behavior. I promise it won't happen again. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get myself together and call my driver to meet me outside."

When she turns around and rushes toward what looks like a dressing room, it hits me that Carly may have been a little embarrassed at the whole situation- he whole 'throw yourself at someone, only to be rejected' situation. I can't help but feel a little bad for her. A part of me is tempted to tell her she has nothing to worry about, but before I can, Milan leaves my side and gathers up his camera equipment, stuffing it in a nearby backpack.

"Let's go, before she comes back," he whispers urgently. His hand clasps around my wrist, pulling me behind him towards the exit.

+++++++

The second we're outside, the cool autumn air brushes against my face. It's a bit dark outside now, but the city is still lively and flooded with people. Milan manages to skillfully maneuver through them, even with me in tow.

This is quickly getting annoying.

Just as I'm about to yank free from his grasp, I bump into his hard body when he stops.

"A warning would have been nice," I grumble.

"Sorry about that," he says, looking over his shoulder with a sheepish grin on his face. "We're here." He turns to open the door of a sleek black car. I'm confused at first, until he lets go of my wrist. "Could you get in for me?"

"Get in?" I repeat. "For what, exactly?"

"I'll give you a ride home as 'thank you' for playing along up there. Or, if you're not comfortable, I'll take you to the closest train station to your house."

"No," I said, shaking my head. "You don't have to do that. I don't mind taking the train home from here."

Actually, I'm dreading the train ride home. But he, as a client of the business, didn't need to know about my discomfort.

"Seriously?" he asks. His eyelids lower in suspicion. "Do you really want to take the train during this hour? The trains are always packed during this time. It'll be an uncomfortable ride. Let me at least take you part way there. That way you're not riding as long."

My feet throb at the explanation, as if telling me to quit playing around and take the damn offer. I'm being stubborn, I know. I don't get any weird vibes radiating off of Milan, but I'd be lying if I said I was completely comfortable with him. I just don't want to seem unprofessional.

Well, one ride won't hurt. It's not like I'll see him again after this anyway. I nod, and get in. It's a really nice car.

"Where to?" Milan asks once he's settled.

I give him the address of the train station closest to my apartment, and he starts driving. Initially the car is quiet, save for the music slowly playing from his radio. I don't usually mind silence, but I felt a strange urge to break it. I didn't even know what I wanted to say, exactly. I didn't know this man. I also wasn't great at initiating conversations with strangers - well, except at work, I suppose. My mind drew a blank as I ransacked it for topics - anything to take my mind off the anxiety I suddenly felt brewing inside of me.

Maybe I could start with the basics?

"So...you're a photographer? That must be nice." Inwardly, I cringe at myself. It's basic all right, and it sounded forced. I don't have anything in common with this guy. I honestly won't blame him if he shuts the conversation down before it even starts. Maybe silence would have been better-

"I am." he replies, to my surprise. Even had I not turned to look his way, I would've known he was was smiling; it's in his tone. "And it is nice most of the time, even when I'm trying to get myself out of chaotic situations with clients. Sorry about that, by the way. I can't imagine how crazy that must have been for you. Oh, wow. I'm so sorry. I haven't even asked you your name."

His eyes tear away from the slow traffic ahead of us and look over at me expectantly. He was still smiling.

Even though I usually work in the back managing and arranging orders, I'd had to deal with plenty of customers at the shop. Being friendly to snobs and rich people takes a toll, but I'd mostly gotten used to it.. What most people might not expect is that getting fake friendliness back is almost as exhausting. Fake smiles suck, especially when they're coming from people that you know would never give you the time of day out on the street.

But this guy, his smile seemed so...genuine. I felt like he actually liked me - or at least didn't mind me.

"Brielle. I'm Brielle. And you're Milan, right?"

"That's right," He nods. "Earlier wasn't the most traditional first meeting, so I'm glad we're getting a do-over."

"I've never really been one to follow tradition, so you don't have to worry about that with me. But I have to admit, you did throw me off guard. Is your work usually like that?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Eh, it can vary. Some days can be less wild than others. But every now and then I get those moments when things get a little crazy. Kind of like today."

I chuckle. "Sounds a little exciting...and exhausting."

"I'll be honest, it really doesn't seem like it's exciting at the moment, but 'exhausting' definitely sounds right. Only when I tell the story to someone else does it sound like some kind of an adventure." He turns his attention back to the road just as traffic begins to move forward, but keeps the conversation going. "Is the flower shop like that for you?"

I sit silently for a second, mentally running through my time spent working at Monika's business. It hasn't been terrible, but it certainly hasn't been exciting.

"I think the most eventful thing it can get at the shop is probably with my co-workers. They can be pretty dramatic. Today was definitely no exception, hence why I was late. She was crying about some guy trouble and I...well, I couldn't even help her. I mean I think I helped with her self-esteem. But as far as her guy trouble? I for damn sure didn't do much with that."

He grunts, "I don't blame you on that. I'm not good at relationship advice myself. Photography? Yes. putting puzzle pieces and contraptions together? Yes. but how to maintain relationships 101? Absolutely not. I tried to help my friend out with it once and his girl didn't talk to him for a week."

"So do you prefer relationships that are more on the superficial side?"

"Superficial?" Milan looks over to me in question. "What do you mean?"

"Something on the surface that doesn't have too much depth or requires you to commit to anyone or anything. "I explain.

"Wow," he grins. "That's a lot to throw at someone."

"I guess I don't always like beating around the bush and rather just outright ask it," I shrug. "Unless you prefer not to talk about it."

"No, I actually like that. I think I can handle a conversation about my preferences." he laughs. " I don't think I'd call it that. It's just what's convenient for me at the moment. So maybe a temporary preference? What about you though? You got a preference?"

The question threw me off for a bit. Not because I find it inappropriate given the circumstance. I just tended to go with the flow of things, and if it got too complicated, I moved along.

But that was prior to being with the father of my child, Marcellus. Even with him, it hadn't been a relationship built on a stable foundation. We were consistent in certain ways with each other but I never felt we were completely in sync with one another. But it was fine. The sex had been decent, so I just dealt with it.

"I dunno, "I answered truthfully. "I mean, I've never had a solid relationship. More so acquaintances. Maybe I don't mind occasional sex"

"Doesn't sound like it's much of a preference for you though."

My brow arches at him.

I don't feel the need to get defensive at Milan. If anything, I find it a little amusing. So, I entertain it.

"How so?"

"You don't sound satisfied, is what I mean."

I fall silent, peering out the window and watching the cityscape scenery slowly go by. I never really sat with my thoughts and considered that possibility.

Me, not being satisfied with what Marcelles and I had? I can't see why that would be the case cause if I wasn't satisfied with that, what else was there for me to want? And Why else would I go along with it?

Then again maybe I wasn't entirely ok with it. Maybe what my new acquaintance said had some truth to it. It would have explained why I stuck with Marcellus so long. Prior to him, I never tended to stay with anyone for a prolonged period of time. It didn't matter if things went good or bad. But there was something about Marcellus's approach that made me stick around.

I wasn't in love with him I knew, but I did appreciate the times he'd been present...that is up until I told him I was pregnant. After that, he showed his true colors.

Like most men tend to do I suppose.

The rest of the ride is rather quiet. Only this time comfortably so. I imagine I exhausted his social battery which was fine since I didn't have much to say myself.

That is until Milan turned to me once he pulled up in a parking spot near the train station.

"I didn't tick you off or anything did I? "

"No," I stared at him quizzically. "How could you have done that?"

"By running my mouth." He chuckled. "My aunt tells me as attentive as I can be. I don't always take people's feelings into consideration when I speak. So, I'm sorry if I said something that made you withdraw or anything."

To my slight annoyance, I couldn't help but be a little taken back at his care.

Had my relationship with men in the past been so tumultuous that I got easily amazed at a man being considerate of my feelings?

At my age of 31 no less.

"You're fine," I say with a smile. I place my hand on the door, but before pushing it open I speak to him, "I just get lost in thought a lot. But maybe you're right about the whole preference thing. I mean I don't know if I don't want to indulge in casual sex any more. But I can't really bring myself to get into it now."

"You said cant. Like it's impossible. "His brows furrow, "any reason why?"

Impossible? No. while I didn't see myself warding off sex completely, I didn't see myself being intimate for a while. My last arrangement with the Marcellus had done something to me to put me off. It could have had something to do with him bailing out on me with a child.

"A few reasons, actually. But I guess being pregnant might make the top of the list," I tell him.

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Authors note:

I just wanted to say thanks so much for the messages! they mean so much. someone mentioned to me also that I should probably put this in another section; sorry about that! I assumed because literotica had a interracial section that it was most fitting but I suppose romance is a better fit.

I know we're still early in the story and you guys need to see where it goes but whether you like the story or not thanks for giving it views! I didn't expect so much on my first try. Hope you guys stick it out with me till the end.