Women Who Talk Pt. 04

"What? Like gaydar?"

"Yeah," she ran a hand through her hair as the microwave pinged again.

"Don't put too much stock in gaydar, a lot of it is wishful thinking and the rest is being able to read body language and as for you, it's up to you to do your own exploring. I've never fucked a guy yet but I haven't discarded the idea completely either, I might under certain circumstances. People do change although I admit it'd be a stretch for me to step over the line. There's nothing wrong with trying it on for size although in your case it has ramifications."

"Tell me about it," she sighed.

"Come on," Penny carried the plate to the bench, "grab yourself a tray and we'll eat in the other room where it's warmer."

Robyn put her plate onto a nearby tray along with her Coke and they made their way through to the living room where a roaring fire greeted them and Robyn glanced over her shoulder.

"Why don't you eat in the dining room? On the other side of the kitchen?"

"Because the only room in this house that is actually always warm in the winter is this one," she set her plate down, "I've been up and down like a dunny seat at a party about getting a climate control in this house ever since I moved in. My dad and mum have both complained about it every time they stay here but so far I've held out but lately because of the cost," she looked up at the exposed beams high above them.

"Installing a climate control system in this place is a nightmare with such a high ceiling, everyone admires the architecture but a tradie just has dollar signs in their eyes."

"I guess so," she looked up as well.

"But all that's about to change as of next week, I've just approved a quote and he can come in next Monday so I'll have to work from home for the first couple of days at least."

"Cool," she managed a smile, "so, you'll be able to do your housework in the nude after all."

"Somehow I doubt I'll be going that far but never say never."

The conversation continued over dinner. Penny discovered that Robyn took her name from her maternal grandmother's middle name. She had an older sister Ruth who was now divorced and living with her boyfriend down the Peninsula, and the funniest story she told was the one about her mother having to get new top and bottom dentures a few years ago It was the quietest she'd ever been in years apart from the occasional 'ooh' or 'ook' whenever she wanted to call on Ruth and Robyn was just 'bin.'

Once the dishes had been put into the dishwasher however the conversation switched to more adult topics such as sex and her new vibrator. Penny disappeared to her bedroom for a few minutes and came back shortly afterwards with a dozen or more dildos and vibrators, which caused Robyn to remark that the room looked like a sex shop now. They talked about dildos for about fifteen minutes and then they got onto the subject of arousal for both women and men. She was surprised to learn the penis was actually quite robust when compared to the testicles, which required a little tickling. The perineum of both men and women was sensitive to touch, she also talked about the clitoris and the various ways it could be stimulated.

The climax came when she invited Robyn to ask questions.

"I guess the burning question is about sex itself. When is the right time to do it? Some women can have one night stands and it's like they're scratching an itch but others put more importance on the act itself."

"It's a personal choice in some ways," she replied.

"I've known a lot of straight women who think the only way to please a man is to fuck him, or feed him. Women like that have self esteem issues because what's between your legs is only a tiny part of you as a person. A man is easily pleased, just spread your legs and moan at the right time and he's as happy as a pig in shit, but women tend to want security and you'll find that gay women tend to focus on getting to know the other person first. Gay men can fuck at the drop of a hat but that's got a lot to do with basic plumbing."

"So, can they really be finished in five minutes?"

"The younger ones, sure, but the older they get the longer they take. With Jeff you could have just wanked him off there and then, and let him go and jump start his sister's car."

"So, what happens, the first time?" Robyn frowned, "I have these fantasies about the first time, they changed over time as I got older and especially when I moved out of home but they all end the same way, but there's no orgasm," she paused.

"I have fantasies about having my breasts kissed and fondled, along with my vagina, but apart from that there's nothing but the aftermath, lying in someone's arms and rubbing their chest," she glanced down at the floor.

"Yeah, that's always a nice fantasy. What other fantasies do you have?"

"Sometimes I'm wearing a wedding dress, more so when I was still at home but lately it's been a little more practical, a going away outfit, sexy nightie, soft lights, music, a warm breeze and then I think about the practicalities of buying those things or arranging it so that the fantasy is as close to reality as possible but just lately I've been talking to Colleen, Josie and others, and they're telling me that it's probably going to just happen when I least expect it," she lowered her eyes.

"Which is probably what happened Tuesday night with Jeff, I know that was at the back of my mind but I hadn't you know," she stopped.

"Moved the pieces into place?" Penny suggested.

"Yeah, nothing was planned. I just sat on top of him and if his sister hadn't called then," she paused, "we'd have done it, I hadn't even thought of wanking him off."

"You still could," she crossed her legs and propped an elbow on the top of the couch, "the one thing I can add to that is don't feel pressured to have sex just because the other person wants to or to fit in with your friends," she propped her head on her palm.

"That goes for sex with anyone by the way, don't feel pressured. It's sex with consenting adults with an emphasis on consent. If you don't feel comfortable with the person then don't do it. I've had my fair share of offers from beautiful women but I knocked some of them back because I just didn't feel comfortable with them," she looked down briefly.

"In my case it has a lot to do with my position in society, men aren't the only ones who have to deal with gold digging women, I've had my fair share of them too. My last girlfriend was a case in point, it started out okay but then she started getting too familiar with my family, she wanted to know their birthdays and when she dropped in on my mum just out of the blue I put my foot down."

"And she wasn't just being friendly?"

"Oh Leslie was being friendly for sure but I hadn't even introduced her to mum, she knew where mum lived but at that stage of the relationship we hadn't gotten to the meeting my mum stage, I just saw red and told her that was the end. She accused me of being paranoid and she's probably right, I do get a little paranoid, I value my privacy and because I've got a bit of money I need to be be on the lookout for those kinds of women."

"She sounds a little pushy," Robyn ventured.

"She was," Penny nodded, "don't get me wrong, I like confident women but I'm not about to have any woman just walk in and take over, boundaries are important," she glanced at the pile of sex toys on the coffee table.

"One of my favourite fantasies," Penny continued, "is to be disrobed, it's a peculiar fetish of mine that I'd put in the category of foreplay but we'll get to foreplay next week," she grinned, "after I've turned my living room into a sex shop. You'd think all I do at night is fuck myself."

"I haven't tried mine out yet but I've been practising my kegel exercises," she checked her watch and leaned forward.

"Good, keep it up. It's not a lifetime habit by the way, but it's a good way to get ready for your first encounter, we women are pretty adaptable down there," Penny yawned.

"I'd better get going,"

"Yeah, and I need to jump into the shower."

"So, what time Saturday?" Robyn asked her a few minutes later.

"I'll pick you up around sixish. Can you be ready by then?"

"No worries," she put her hands on the couch.

"Well, thank you for the company and I'm looking forward to Saturday night."

"So am I," she put the electric dildo back into her handbag and then chuckled.

"What?"

"If only my mother could see me now, carrying a dildo in my handbag, and the bloody condoms," she closed the bag.

"Shit, that reminds me, I have to call Brenda and arrange to have someone cover my shift."

"You haven't done it yet?" Penny raised an eyebrow.

"Um, no, I've been distracted, thinking about sex."

She felt as if the dominoes were indeed falling as she drove back down the mountain that night, the barriers and obstacles to sexual intercourse had been effectively and quietly dismantled and it was not as if Penny had preached some sexual mantra. She was not even trying to seduce her and to be honest she'd half expected something like that. It was hard to quantify her feelings for Penny. On the one hand she acknowledged that she was desirable, both physically and mentally but she also felt an emotional attachment as if she was the big sister she'd never had.

However even that was a difficult one to write off as simply platonic because she naturally looked for security in personal relationships. Could that emotional connection meld with the physical into something else, or was she just playing with fantasy?

***

It certainly seemed that way Robyn mused nearly twenty four hours later as she stood in Cindy's sewing room with Alana and Cindy. The planned lunch date that day hadn't panned out because Alana had had a surprise visit from a regional manager and so she took Erin out instead, leaving her with the manager. When they returned an hour later Alana looked pensive but when Erin asked her if everything was okay she simply nodded.

"I'm hungry," she stepped away from the counter.

Robyn fiddled with the brooch at her throat. Alana hadn't given her the brooch she'd paid for in front of the regional manager for obvious reasons but it was waiting for her when she dropped into the store at closing time. Alana seemed a little distracted however and Robyn wisely kept quiet as she waited for Alana and her colleagues to close up shop and then they headed to the back carpark where Erin hopped into Robyn's car instead of Alana's.

"I thought you'd ride with Alana tonight."

"Not tonight," she muttered, "she told me off."

"Maybe she's under pressure. Regional managers tend to be pointy headed."

"She's a bitch."

"Who? Alana or the manager?"

"Theresa, the fat slut."

It was only when they got back home and Robyn got into Alana's car that the truth came out.

"She's angry with me, I know she is," Alana glanced over at her as Robyn put on her seatbelt, "and I was going to apologise in the car but I guess that'll have to wait until Monday," she stared straight ahead and bit her lip.

"I'm so sorry, I forgot that Harry Potter book too. It was sitting on the coffee table last night but I had to let Mac out for a shit and he was taking his time about it but I'll bring it in on Monday."

"Hey, no worries, it's cool. You just seemed a little... tense today."

"I was okay until Theresa turned up," she released the handbrake and shifted into first gear.

"The last manager was just great, we got on like a house on fire but Theresa is a bitch. She used to be a store manager like me but she was promoted to regional manager and the power's gone to her head," she teased a lock of hair over her ear as she came to a stop at Durham Road.

"She was chewing my ear off for nearly two hours. I've been running that fucking store for three and a half years but she's acting as if I've just started there. I'd have told her to stick her job up her arse but I need to pay the mortgage, which way?"

"Left, so, what would you do, if you had a choice?"

"Law," she spun the wheel, "my dad was a cop, he quit after he and mum broke up but I loved just sitting on his knee helping him paste amendments into his law folders. I learned how to read sitting on his knee, I was only seven years old and I was coming out with words like therefore, summary, and applicable at school."

"You must have done well in English."

"She gave me the lowest possible mark in English because she thought I was cheating, you have to love the Victorian education system, it's aptly named. They just wanted to turn out robots," she changed gear.

"I did apply for law school but then I got married and that was the end of that idea. My husband said we couldn't afford to have just one wage coming in."

"You should talk to my friend Penny, she's got the family law practice back there, I don't know if she has any vacancies but she'd have ideas and maybe contacts."

Alana had been interested in that but there was little Robyn knew about opportunities but she did tell her that her dad was a cop, which got a smile from Alana.

Robyn chanced a glance at Alana as Cindy took another measurement. She'd unbuttoned her blouse and pulled it out of the black trousers for a shoulder to waist measurement. Alana smiled crookedly and raised her arm up and outwards. There was a knock on the door and Cindy glanced over at it as she wrote down the measurement.

"Come in already."

Mary stepped into the room a moment later with two cups of coffee.

"White and one for you," she put the cup down on the table.

"Thank you," Alana raised her other arm.

"And yours," Mary handed it to her.

"I'll leave you in peace," she backed away.

"You always measure both arms," Cindy told Robyn, "arms and legs can be different lengths, allow at least two centimetres more for the overall length."

"I hope you're taking all this in," Alana smiled at her.

"I am," she nodded and Alana lowered her arm as Cindy stepped back.

She wrote down the next measurement and Alana looked down at her legs.

"Are you going to measure my legs as well?"

"I can do but let's focus on getting you looking like Meg Ryan," she smirked.

"She's my celebrity crush," Alana started buttoning her blouse.

"Mine too," Cindy replied, "my partner and I both love Meg Ryan."

"Your partner?" Alana glanced at her.

"Mary," she replied, "most people think she's my daughter or a cousin."

"I kind of thought that but wasn't going to say anything. How long have you been together?"

"Ten years."

"My sister is gay, she's been with her partner for four years," she replied, "and my best friend has been with her partner with about a year."

"It's a growing trend all right," Cindy studied the picture she'd printed from a movie still, "the only hard part will be the embroidery, the rest is fairly easy. The buttons may not be exact though."

"Oh it doesn't need to be exact, I just like the overall look, do you want the money now?"

"It's up to you, I'm easygoing."

"I'll pay you now," she decided.

Alana seemed a little more relaxed on the way back to Robyn's place. It was almost like a complete change of personality and Robyn couldn't work out if it had something to do with Cindy's down to earth nature or something she'd done, she rather suspected the former. She chatted about her plans for the weekend, which amounted to housework on Saturday and a relaxing Sunday at home. Alana also confessed to being a Suzi Quatro fan.

"My sister used to have a Suzi Quatro poster hanging on her wall. She once said she suspected she was gay because the picture turned her on so much and I have to admit that I was drawn to the same poster as well."

"Along with Meg Ryan," Robyn's eyes shifted.

"Yeah, Meg does it for me along with Angie Harmon from Law and Order," she slowed down and flicked her indicator lever.

"She is cute," Robyn stared at a familiar panel van coming towards them, "that's Kathy."

"Who's Kathy?" Alana stared at the driver as well.

"One of the women I met at this group I go to, Women Who Talk," she leaned over to toot the horn as Kathy slowed for her street, Robyn waved and Kathy returned the wave.

"What's women who talk?"

"It's a bunch of women who gather in different homes each month to talk about women's issues, it's where I got back in touch with Cindy. Penny is also part of the same group, it was at her joint up on top of Mount Dandy this month."

"Sounds like something I'd be into," she turned into Anita Street.

"I could ask Penny on Saturday night, there's a few different groups just to keep it manageable if you know what I mean."

"Is Kathy single?"

"She's with Melissa at the moment."

"Okay," she nudged the accelerator, "she looked cute although I didn't get much of a look."

"She is, she's a spray painter and panel beater. She's got a heart of gold."

"Maybe I should reconsider my options," she glanced over at her, "not that I've got an urge to fuck a woman but just lately I've been reevaluating my life. I've been divorced for years," she came to a stop outside Robyn's house.

"And I should be dating again, I was dating a guy, just after I separated from my husband, but that was just to clear the cobwebs, but when that guy I told you about wanted to set up house together I thought here we go again, I'll be tied down to another man. I ended it and ever since then I've been happily single," she shifted into neutral and applied the handbrake.

"It was hard at first because, you know, you're used to having company or someone to go and see at the weekend or your days off, but after a while you start to appreciate the solitude. I think I'd be at odds with a man if he moved into my house, I've got my own routine, I've got Mac. I tell my dog all my secrets and he's never turned against me or told anybody else. He's not going to run off with my best friend or leave his socks lying around and he's always happy to see me."

"So, what's changed?" Robyn asked her.

"I'm missing the intimacy, that human touch. I just don't want clingy guys or women," she turned the engine off, "my ideal partner would be someone who doesn't want to move into my place and just wants to come around for a meal or a video night. I've got nothing against a night between the sheets as long as it doesn't transition to moving in together."

"Yeah, I'm the same," Robyn replied, "I'm with Jeff now but after Tuesday night I've realised that we've reached that point where we either go all the way and root each other or break it off and just move onto someone else."

"You haven't done it with him?" Alana stared at her, "you're not that into him?"

"I've um... never had sex."

"Oh, okay," Alana smirked, "I was the same, I was a virgin up until my nineteenth birthday. Mum was convinced I was sleeping with Alec but Alec and I were always just friends, my first intimate boyfriend was Jack. I purposefully waited until I was nineteen because mum was always teasing me about Alec and I was determined to prove her wrong. When I broke up with Alec I went out with Jack the next weekend and we did it in the back seat of his Ford Fairlane," she smirked.

"As first time encounters go, I could have chosen a better venue. My back was killing me for days after that," she pursed her lips.

"We did do it in his bed the next weekend but I moved on from Jack pretty quickly and wound up with Roger the Dodger, so my sexual experienced amounts to three men in total. Jack, Roger and Frank," she stared straight ahead.

"But after seeing Karen and her partner together I've been thinking that perhaps I should look at other options. I'm just not there yet," she glanced at her, "knowing my luck I'd wind up with some green eyed bunny boiler."

"Well, why not come along to this group I'm involved with, most of the women have partners, some are straight and some are gay but it's broadened my social network."