All Comments on 'Words on Skin'

I'm not clear on how you arrived at your assesment of my writing ability based on my 11/22/09 profession of my preference for bowing out of a story on a romantic high note. And I don't think I'm destined to be a great writer but, rest assured, I'll keep working on my writing. Who knows? Maybe someday I'll even get your vote. Or maybe not. XD

this is....just amazing.....i absolutely loved it...it had me wanted to read more and more....and the imu....kinda makes me wish i had a sister.....but oh well...this was a greats story to read and i thank you for it.

Very sexy AND interesting. Congrats. I (M) also figured out the IMU fairly early on, I think when the first mis-read of a word was mentioned.

Again, a great unputdownable read!

Great story, I enjoyed it. I used to write on my sister's back when we were really young, all sorts of things. I wouldn't carry it as far as this story, but it's both an exciting, very well-written story and it brings back fond memories of my childhood.

Literary erotica is supposed to be poorly written. This is hands down the best piece of literotica ive ever read. I couldn't decide whether to "finish", laugh, or read till the end because the story was actually interesting. The only constructive feedback I can give you is: a few minor typos(i think i saw 4?) and switching it up a little bit more when describing penis/vagina(your favorite one is "sex"). Again...fantastic story.

This just reminds me why I really need to pick up a book and start reading if I were want to write like this. Excellent work. I was absolutely engaged the entire time, so you must be doing something right.

I don't think I have ever read an erotic story so quickly. It was funny, sexy, interesting, and very engaging. If all the writters were as good as you were then I'd practically live on this site. Now I will need some privacy!

If you leave no mystery life sucks. Learn to live. Learn to love. Only then will you appreciate the mystery in life.

Great story! You are probably one of the most gifted writers on this platform. This is not just crazy fucking from early on. You develop the characters first and build up tension before the sexual encounters, and your style is very eloquent. The motif of the 'words on skin' is used throughout the story, but not overused in a way that makes it annoying. Great writing!

The only thing that I noticed which could be criticized was some switching between first person and third person narration (at some points you use 'I' and 'me', refering to Richard). Besides that, there's nothing at all that you should change in your writing. Keep on the great work!

I really enjoyed this story; I think it is well written and believable.

Keep writing and ignore "to bad's" comment.

While I usually read daddy/daughter stories, this one had me hooked from the start.

Believe it or not, I got 'imu' immediately. And I'm a guy.

And this is the best literotica that I've ever read. Thank you.

fuck that guy, you are a great writer and this was one of the best stories i've ever read

Dear PacoFear,

Just a note to say thanks for the good read. I really enjoyed the way the story played out. I think you did a great job of having patience with the story. I also have to admit that the "IMU" was pretty easy for me to spot what you were trying to do. Still very well done and I appreciate that you took the time to add more depth to the story and characters.

This was amazing....it was a privilage to read this story. 6 stars out of 5. easily

I've never commented here before, but I just wanted to say thanks for this. It was genuinely moving, and I actually cared about the characters. Not what I expect to find on literotica, but very valuable nonetheless.

This was the most heartfelt, moving, surprising story I've read on here. A definite gem. Never stop writing, please.

I get off to this story constantly. Not only that but it has a fantastic story line in general. You are a fantastic writer! Very original, sweet, and sexy at the same time!

so well written.

at first i thought imu was i miss u but that wouldnt make sense since she started writing it as a kid...

Solid plot, amazing character depth, and need I mention how hot this was? Could not figure out "I.M.U." which added a nice twist. Very well done. Wickedly well written. This has been bookmarked. Can't wait to check out more of your work.

K

...I suggest you wander over and read my newer one, "Macallan Promises." At its heart, "Macallan Promises" is a lesbian sister-sister romance. It's in the fantasy category but it's not loaded with unicorns and gnomes -- just a tasty bit of Gaelic witchery. C'mon, try something new. You won't be disappointed. -PF

i got the gist of the 'i heart you' thing, but it didn't occur to me that she was saying more than 'i love you' all that time and instead pronouncing her being 'in love' throughout their lives. that revelation certainly felt more meaningful than what i had in mind!

(also, truth be told, i think writing it out in the sand once and then sloping the legs down would've been a less involved action but would have retained that same moment of clarity, perhaps with her doing it in a slightly slower manner, even, for added weight behind her touch.)

amazing story. lizzie was very well developed, and there's nothing better than a character that encompasses a plot, especially in erotic fiction.

Best Liter.. story EVER!

it wasn't too hard to figure out.. But I guess I've had practice. Got in to this habit of telling people "I less than three you" seeing how long it takes for them to get. so when she called him the stupidest dumb person it reminded me of that.

David

Just Wow, great writing, great everything.

Like a great novel, couldn't read fast enough. Well done!!

nice story, i thought imo meant i miss you (thought it wouldn't make sense, it just popped into my head)

oops imu = i miss you*

fail D;

I knew the very first time I saw the imu mentioned what it really was. I love puzzles. :)

I thought it was "I'll marry you"

One of the best written stories I have ever read! I couldn't stop...You are a talented author and I will be reading anything you upload. Thanks for the incredible thrill ride!

I thought it was I make you..."pancakes", "oatmeal", "waffles".

I guess I was too literal.

Great story, well written, and if a romantic love story could be written about siblings, I guess this would be the one. Although I do think Lizzie has some crazy stalker girl in her.

Can't wait to read more from you.

This was amazing, lovely, and hot!

I wasn't trying to to figure out "IMU typographically; I was imagining someone using her fingers to draw it. The only thing I knew that went with an I and a U was a heart, and an M certainly does jive with that, so there you go, Vic TG got it right away. Where's my medal?

Story was yet another of the more awesome bits I've read, authors aside. One of the few that didn't leave me begging for an editor to work on it.

Copper- the only reason you did was because you found it and read it before sending onto me!

Paco - the only complaint I have with this is how often you mentioned how "small," "little," and "tiny" she was. We got that! Now I wanna know if they spend their lives together and whatnot. Sigh, so romantic, which is weird to write since they're sibs...ah well.

The story is well written, and the "IMU" device is clever and thought-provoking.

I just gotta comment that this story was very good.

And the "imu" thing I thought she was toying with him by making the m supposed to be an n so it would say "inu" so it would be "I need you." I was close but yet so far. Still quite ingenious.

What a piece of crap if it wasn't the brother genius who acted like the most normal guy that ever walked the earth it was the super sister AKA ben johnson.

Then her boyfriend had a dick the size of a tps gold softball bat like oh god that is done to fucking death like come on "big as the gap between her legs" she would have had better luck with her shoe.

Just so far off the mark for a good story it is a reason you should not write anymore.

very good story, thoroughly enjoyed it. It was well thought out and very descriptive. thank you

That was the best incest story I have read in a while. Extremely well planned, the plot was excellent, and while Chip's nonexistence was easy to figure out, the 'imu' blew me away! I LOVED IT. thank you!!

Great story, I really enjoyed it! Keep on writing long stories, they are the best. Thanks

Unreal, unbeliveably awesome , what a great story. I would have to say this is probably the best story in this category!! WELL DONE!!!

and a hot hot hot one at that! Great work.

Not only was this amazingly hot, but the story was so well written and full of emotion. It really made me ache in ways I hadn't felt in a long time. If only I had a brother like that!

Very impressive. A touching tale. The "emu" riddle was cute. I'd love to read a sequel, I think the characters could continue to entertain with some time to roam and grow.

Cheers,

T

Absolutely pro, that was excellently done.

Incest is not really my thing.. but your story was awesome, romantic and funny and left me wishing the best for Scooter and Lizzie.

This was a great read. I can't believe it took me five months to find it. very well done and incredibly erotic.

I'm the kind of person who reads the incest and taboo stories and thinks they're great and hot and whatnot, but would never even consider having a fantasy about my own relatives, let alone actually TRY it. However, reading this, it almost made me weirdly want a closeness like that with my brother; not really the sex part, just how super close these two are. This was a great read and I enjoyed the whole time (enjoyed and ENJOYED, if you know what I mean.) Well done!

This story was amazing and i loved it so much! i read it over and over again and i still cried at how touching it was and how amazingly wonderful and happy it was at the end. this is the best story i have ever read! the characters lizzie and scooter were so real! i give this story 5 stars!!!

... of the longer stories, but this one rocked. Held my attention (for more than jus the sex) and made me want to see how things turned out. You have a new fan if your other stories are as half as good as this one.

I loved this story, good job

Absolutely one of the best pieces of sexy prose available. Convincing, too.

Great story, always nice to find a believable and interesting romance among the action. No, never figured out IMU...well done!

Hope to see more from you in the future, keep writing!

This is by far and large my favorite story on LE. The level of intimacy this story radiates is breathtaking to say the least. Thank you PacoFear for a wonderful adventure.

Awesome story. Really.

Figured out imu the second time it was mentioned though... maybe make a riddle that nobody could really solve but makes sense once you see the answer?

Read your postscript... maybe it is a hard puzzle and I just got lucky? Idk it just seemed pretty obvious to me...

This read was one of THE best stories I've read on Literotica. The way you slowly built the story and the seduction of Richard was great, you've got a knack for keeping the reader interested. The details in the scenes were well written, tying in continual physical descriptions of the characters along the way. The little stories about their past made this so much more believable than many other sibling incest stories I've read. The history creates the bond, the internal struggle, and sometimes feeds the lust.

An old flame and I used to play 'words on skin', so my head went pretty quickly to the 'imu' reference. Another nice touch that added quite the sentimental value at the end. I shocked myself early on by figuring out Chip was fake. Dawned on me as Scooter was fingering Lizzie's ass. Awesome story as a whole, keep 'em coming.

Well written. Good imagry. Nice story, however it wasn't hard to figure out that the m in imu was a heart. I really enjoyed your character deveopement and plotting skills. I fully intend to read more of your stories.

WOW what a great tail. I read it from start to finish and it was like i was watching it happen. VERY GOOD NARITIVE!!

such a good story, and the imu had ne going for ages, I thought it was i miss you :) write more!

Very good storyand well written. I guss as a guy I missed the IMU. I thought she was saying " I Marry You", shows how mens mind works.

Well first as a male I have to gloat, I got the IMU straight of the bat.

It was a game I played with my own children when they were younger.

This was by far the best piece of fiction that I have ever read on any site by far, thankyou and congratulations.

Every aspect of the story was excellent. I had an appointment but missed it to finish the story. It was worth it! Well done!

This was a well thought out and very discriptive story. I couldn't read it fast enough to get to the end. I would love to read more of your work. Now it's time to releave myself of the ache I'm feeling between my legs. Just simply GREAT reading.

this story was well thought out and well written. Not too long or short.. just right and absolutely beautiful

Nope, I didn't catch it, but that didn't stop my enjoyment as I experienced your story. An imaginative story with a great twist. One of the best I've read here. Thanks for sharing.

OK let's get the negative stuff out of the way first, this story kept me from gettting my nap in. Now for the rest, this is probably the best story I've ever read please write more!!! I've run competitively all my life and never ran into any female runners that were hot, thanks for the fantasy

Greetings all the way from Brazil!

As a published writer, I can honestly say that this is stunningly written. I'm really impressed. If you haven't already, you should look into getting your work published. Ha! For all I know, you're a famous writer.

Great story, I also am one who almost passed up the story for being too long, glad I didn't. Love the characters and felt that they were real characters. I won't lie, I'd be happy to read a second chapter, but I can also see how it might take away from the story or be pointless. Either way, amazing job.

I figured "imu" meant I Love You because it sounded like it.

Really, one of the best I've ever read.

A wonderful story - a truly beautiful tale.

I'm such a girl. I cried lol

Beautifully written!!!!

I read your story and all I can say is WOW. This was wonderfully written. You have a GREAT eye for plot and plot twist. Please keep up the good work.

I really liked this story. It had good written characters, a great plot with a good background. And the Imu thing was really cute and sweet. I can't honestly say I figured it out I thought maybe it was supposed to be an L for I Love U and since she was just a kid she accidentally put M instead. But I like the heart better. I want to write a story soon and I hope you'll be pleased to know that this story will be a big inspiration. sincerely Will

This was a well thought of story, your description of their moments felt line I was watching them on the telly or spying on their every move.....10/10

really great story, the plot is excellent, 10/10. i also thought that imu meant "i marry u" or something strange like that, but i was happy that it all made sense in the end. while i was reading, i had suspicions that the marriage was all a hoax, and i was correct. anyways, awesome story, in all ways perfect

the best story i have read on this site. it was brilliantly written and great plot. i got "IMU" after the first one. suprised to see alot of people didnt realise. nice touch. WELL DONE!!!

Whatever your view is on the story's main theme, this is a great piece of short erotic literature. Beautifully crafted, real characters, well-written, and even funny. Not to mention about as hot as all hell, and as realistic as this genre can get. It even mixed two of my own fetishes in erotica; anal sex and brother-sister incest. I salute you, sir! 5 stars! I'll be looking into your work in the future.

I loved this story...and no I had no clue off what the imu meant until the very end. Again good story

This was a great story. Please continue with your writing. I knew with the first IMU, that is how i taught my son to draw his first heart, by starting with an m and adding a v to the bottom of it when he was little.

I read a couple of incest stories now and this one was by far the most romantic and authentic one.

It is diffrent in every way and very intense.

I figured out that there might be no Chip. You dropped a hint. But I didn't figure out that Imu thing.

Great work. You made the two of them very real.

Thank you!

From the title to the final scene it was a great story. It's so much more satisfying to find one's self invested in the characters and caring about their feelings and desires as opposed to some of the hot-chick-big-dick-cliche things found here. There is a place for that, too, I suppose, but I find stories like this to be far superior. I love all the little touches you add--the childhood games, nicknames, etc., really add so much depth to the story. And even despite the taboo nature of everything involved, it never really seemed dirty or cheap. It's a hard line to walk, but you managed it perfectly. In case it's not clear, I loved it.

all i can say is thank you, i truly enjoyed reading this story (in more ways than one). Please keep writing, as i will definatly be following your submissions. 15/5 stars. p.s. i figured the imu out when it was first written, didn't realize i was that quick :P

This is one on the best stories I've ever read! Full mark to PacoFear, and for the record I got the IMU thing right away, very clever though. I have one question though, If there was no Chip then does that mean that Lizzie lost her virginity to Scooter? (Because in the story she says that she lost her virginity to some one else but Scooter remarks on how 'Chip must not be [doing] her as often...') Just a thought...

Your story moved smoothly and seamlessly from beginning to end. I thought it got a little thin, however, when she began asking for "intense" attention. This was a special situation and I would have thought she'd have to pursuade more deeply than she apparently did. I understand the reciprocal feelings, but the two sides could have received a little more development. The story was great; the characters were very sympathetic; and the conclusion was very satisfying. One only wonders how far they can take the NEWLY found situation!

Great story!! Love the writing style.

...had me stumped right to the end...( its not a male failing is it..?)anyways... that was a nice little hook that kept me interested along with the well written story... full marks for the story... Cheers.

You have to be my favorite author except TryAnything. The best writings are Incest/Taboo. KEEP IT UP!

So many of the stories and novellas on this site focus to much on the erotica and ignore the literature. This however is different - Beautifully written and with a well constructed and almost believable narrative. 5 Stars.

I got it instantly. It really added to the "smartest dumb guy" thing. Sure it has a different effect if you don't get it until she spells it out for you, but no less awesome. Great story.

i loved this. i got it as soon as i read it;; i do cute little tricks like that and enjoy riddles :) loved the story too...perfection

I understood it at once, it was a good puzzle though.

A well thought out story and plot.

To put it simply

Its Brilliant

I have to admit I love a good fling, but far too many writers jump right in and don't give it time to build. A good background story makes it that much more exciting.

positive:

-good mix of story scenes and "action" scenes

-really good job on teasing the reader along until the story builds up to the initial climax

-beautiful and creative erotic imagery and metaphors

negative:

the only criticism i could offer is the story kind of drags on after the initial climax(first sex scene) and starts to lose interest. I believe this is because the initial climax peaks too high and the second part of the story cannot top it. Therefore, each subsequent climax loses excitement at an exponential rate, to the point it is no longer a climax, and reading loses the pleasure the first half delivered so well.

overall:

give it a 9/10... because there's always room for improvement, but very very well done :)

Absolutely fantastic. While I'm into incest stories, I tend to favor mom/son ones. However, there are a few exceptions, and this one is definately one of them. Fantastic build up and awesome sex scenes. Considering the narrative, you should have lingered longer to describe the characters feelings, and in a few cases the afterglow after their time together. It always add to the understanding of the characters in my opinion. The thing about Chip seemed a little forced though... How could she fool her family into thinking of her engagement without them meeting Chip? Beats me. Other than that, a truly awesome story. Thanks a lot for your effort and keep up the great work.

This was seriously one of the sweetest stories I've read on the site. It might not be the sexiest, but I still loved it. Keep on writing.

Loved the way you developed the characters and gave them a backstory. Made the read much more intimate. Most of the times I'm reading shorter "cut-to-the-bedroom-scene" stories for quick fixes, but your story gave something that lasts longer. Really admire your talent. Keep on writing!

Beautiful story, great buildup, believable characters. What more could anyone ask? Oh yeah, it's pretty hot too.

Hello,

I've read (romance) since I was 9..my own, secret, escape from a world too hard, too vicious blah blah.. Fifteen years later, and about two months ago, I discover erotica (shocker, I lack worldliness). It appeals to me because it is so rough. So blatant.

You are a phenomenal story teller. It was Wonderful reading. Just enough. You gave me just enough. These characters captured me and I felt for them. I was Totally engaged.

Thank you, very much.

A request.. for any information on any other writings (stories, poems, whatever) you have posted or printed under this or other pseudonym's.

-It is a true pleasure, Beth