All Comments on 'You Know: What Happens at Vegas...'

For a first time story, it was hot. Sufficiently long to get me going, but short enough to want to read part 2.

Needs a little editing since I caught a couple of errors in verbs tense, but nothing really to distract from the story.

Congratulations! You have managed get every possible cliché into a one page story! Even the title is a cliché! Then of course the obligatory misspellings and grammar errors. I counted seven before I gave up.

Then the ridiculous "plot". My cabbage plot has more believeable eroticism than this compost heap!

The poster child for illiteracy due to a poor public education is now posting on Liter. Join the club.

Forget grammar and spelling errors. The story was HOT. Waiting for parts 2,3,4,5, etc.

I agree with goodshoes2 the grmar errors and stuff didn't matter. That story was HOT. It made me hard and if I wasn't at work is be stroking it right now