All Comments on 'Your Birthday Surprise'

Get an editor or re-read your story. The "you" and "I" and "my" and "your" ended up confusing me and greatly distracting as I tried to read what would have been a good story.

I try to avoid using names in my stories. I honestly don't like it all. Therefore the story has to be told from "my" or "your" point of view. "He and she" won't cut it either. Not my style. :)

I enjoyed this very much. Thanks!