All Comments on 'Joe & Friends_1_Cancerfree For 62 Mo.'

I swung in to read this after I saw your post on the Story Feedback forum. I was going to offer you a friendly edit.

Unfornately, Geeky, this just isn't woth editing. It reads like something you typed up in about half an hour. There just doesn't seem to be anything here worth a reader's time.

Wretched grammar, horrible word choice, undeveloped characters, purposeless dialog, and a complete lack or eroticism or romance. And what is your obsession with calling a male orgasm a "white fountain"? And "tit void"? Seriously?!

Stop writing. Start reading. You don't have anything to offer. Not yet anyway.