All Comments on 'Wolf Love Ch. 02'

i need longer chapters....

You're doing really well. It's getting more interesting. Longer chapters would be nice, but you will find your groove. Keep up the good work!

Try to make your chapters longer and more frequent

So going ok, but to me still reading a bit like a to do list...she is attacked..wakes in hospital type room surrounded be strangers...gets knocked out and wakes in den...

You wrote...Katrina, we have quite a bit to discuss....

BUT didn't really tell her anything other then a rogue attacked her and she had to stay! Did the rogue bite infect her so that she will change..He didn't explain any of that to her,how her body will go through a drastic change and that she to will have a wolf within her..he told her nothing she didn't already already know, that she was attacked by a wolf. She still thinks she is human..

So I am just a tad confused. Is she a forced turn? Or is she still a human? Why are they thinking about tell her about finding a mate, when she doesn't even know she is turning into a were?

Well this was certainly an improvement from the last chapter. I do agree with Willieone on careful with the to do list outline. Also when you give past information try to make the flash backs relevant to what is going on in the current situation. Like it was triggered by the events going on. That will help link the past detail to the present. A good goal for length for your chapters is 2-3 lit pages unless your going to post more frequently. For this being your first story you are doing well. Just make sure to create a nice even flow with your story line. Finish out each thought and action fully, it can be a little choppy and abrupt at times. If you are worried that your being over detailed or taking to much time on a conversation or section in the story I'm here to tell you so far you haven't. I'll be back to read the next chapter :) Keep going

more please

Much improved... I am looking forward to more on this story.. :)

liked it, keep writing

But you should be a little more careful. You write that katrina's first foster mother was killed in their house by a robber. But katrina came home waiting for her to return ,while her mother was suposed to be dead in the same house katrina was waiting in for a whole day before she called the police.How couldn't she had not stumbled on her dead body in all that time? .Before I turn into sherlock holmes ,just be more careful with your events, readers can loose their trust to your writing if mistakes like these continue.

We can get really nasty since our only job is to critisize the writers.They call it abuse of power I think.. but we can also be gentle espesially since you warned us your a brand new writer. Good luck and keep writing.

I will like to see longer chapters....its good start hope o see a next chapter Soon ....

Looking foward for more of this story dont take to long....

Please hurry up and post the next chapter! I love this story you're a great writer!

hey. this chapter was good. The story moves forward. I'm going to comment the way I would when beta reading for people...so don't take this as tearing u up. It is only an attempt to help you as you go forward. I think one thing is that you needed to note what you were doing when you went into the past. I was sitting there saying, 'Wait who is this now?' The girl said she was back in her 'home town' before she went to the lake. So, I didn't expect some story about a foster family etc. I think it would have been good to say something, whether it was to put something that said '5 years ago' or whatever. Even starting it with 'looking back' might have made it possible to see it might be her story. Honestly, it really should have fit in the first chapter. I don't know if the story was an afterthought to deal with the issue of family so we know she didn't have any waiting for her? I guess transitioning would be something to work on with an editor or even a beta reader. You can ask a fan to do it or get one through the site on your profile page. The characters you're making are good. I'd try to give more background on them. You never actually say Keith and Charlotte are alphas. they could have introduced themselves as this. They have also not told her if she'll become a werewolf. Wouldn't that be a first question from Katrina? One other thing is, don't feel like you have to lay breadcrumbs for stuff coming. I could be totally off-base, but I would expect that the other alpha will end up being her mate? If that is the plan, it would be fine not to have the alphas discuss telling her. Let it happen so it is a surprise to the reader. Or you could have her taught basics about weres and have it rolled into that. Just so it doesn't announce your storyline ahead of time.

Overall, I think you're doing a great job. I like that you are creating backstory, I think you have begun to create great characters and can tell you'll give details that will make them more real. Keep at it. Just try to note somehow for the reader if you go back in time or whatever so they aren't confused by a sudden change in story, time, etc.

Update, Update, Update, Update!

I agree with canned, a proofreader/beta reader would do well for you. I've done a bit myself and would be willing to offer my services as a proofreader for your work.

Please continue with this story, you gave us a tease now we need to finish it