All Comments on 'Yes, Your Highness Ch. 01'

A bit naf, but then again, who am I to say?

words like: ignition button, are more humorous than erotic/sensual. You got a couple more of them in your story and it is a tad jarring.

As for some SW-Universe nit picks, the proper name of the planet is Tatooine: http://www.starwars.com/databank/location/tatooine/

And unless I'm sorely mistaken at the timeframe that you're having this story take place, Leia didn't know yet that she was adopted. (Unless this is dealt with in the SW-EU in which I'm not very well versed.) So, unless I'm mistaken as previously pointed out, then she'd think of Aldeberan as the home of her parents. Nor did Han meet with Leia on Tatooine, least not until he got "defrosted" in Return of the Jedi.

You might be thinking of either Hoth or Yavin IV, with Yavin IV being the likeliest, because Han did originally intend to leave for Tatooine to pay Jabba back, course he turned the Falcon arrived and saved Luke's backside at the end of A New Hope as we all know. Hoth is less likely, because they didn't have the time to do what you are suggesting, due to the Imperial attack in The Empire Strikes Back.

That's one of the most important things to remember, when doing a story in a pre-existing universe. You got to watch those details like a hawk, lest pedantic folks like me start to lecture you on them. ;)

For your first time celeb story it wasn't half bad, just got to watch those issues I just pointed out to you.

I'd been curious about this story since you told me you were working on a SW piece. Shows potential.

I agree on the details when you're working in an established world. Gotta watch those, otherwise it pulls the reader out of the story (at least it does if they know the world well enough).

Very cool though, and I look forward to seeing more of your stuff (or maybe hearing it). :)

Ummm...I must admit, I've never heard a clit called a detonation button....Quite interesting, but no too erotic.

well, it's not the best thing i've read, but it does show potential. The vocabulary is a little more amusing than arousing, though.

keep writing

alright, where's chapter 2?

joy stick?

please! that is god awful.

'joy-stick', 'detonation button' R they playing a VIDEO-Game or screwing? Chr!st, the word-choices blew. I could not even get erect because of your poor vocabulary. Thanks, but I'd rather have Chewbacca take me from behind, really. Do NOT try ch.2! Please do everyone a favor & leave bad enough alone! sheesh

It wasn't the WORST thing I've read... and apart from spelling mistakes and time anomalies, it was good.

Bad spelling, and the erotic scenes were sub par.

If you are going to talk about Star Wars learn to spell names and places right.

u did good if it wasn't 4 the spelling. over all a good read