All Comments on 'A Sissy in Chastity (Short)'

by Sissywants2fuck

Sort by:
  • 3 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

I’m sorry, but no.

The shifts between 1st, 2nd and 3rd person were jarring.

The inconsistencies in plot also spoiled the flow (he’s blindfolded, yet can describe the person entering the room...)

Sorry, but just didn’t work for me.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

Got to agree with the other comment. Get a proofreader or an editor of something. Great premise but the execution needs a lot of work.

AnonymousAnonymousabout 3 years ago

It is a mess. You have missing words and added words that make no sense. The story makes no sense and lacks depth and information. You should start over and you need a proofreader as well. Keep trying as we all start somewhere. Good luck.

Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous
userSissywants2fuck@Sissywants2fuck
College Student PreMed, biology major, trying to have some fun. I enjoy connecting with people with intelligent discussion, I dont find dumb attractive. Feel free to ask me questions in the life sciences if you're interested, but beware I'll likely be overly interested.