A Step into Self Discovery Pt. 01

*This story has elements of cuckoldery, please don't read it if this sort of content upsets you.*

I don't know know what more to do, I'm slowly losing my mind and I don't think I can hold on anymore.

My name is David, I'm 23 and I'm currently working up the courage to do something lifechanging.

A little backstory, I was born and brought up in the city, living with my mom who had me when she was young. We lived a pretty ordinary life. I had good grades, okay at sports and had a decent school life. There was a small issue though, I was a crippling porn addict. It was everything to me, I remember masturbating atleast 5-6 times everyday and if I got my house to myself, then I'd do it 8-9 times a day. It got to the point where that was all that I could think of.

When I was 19, I got together with my first girlfriend. She was a really nice girl. Optimistic, charming and beautiful. I lost my virginity to her when I turned 20. But the issue was that our sex life only went downhill after the first year. My addiction kept catching up to me and we often found ourselves disappointed in bed because I couldn't get hard.

She was troubled at first but she said that we'll get through it. But when she realized that it only kept getting worse, she confronted me about whether I don't find her sexually attractive anymore? The poor girl had lost confidence in herself due to an issue that was my own creation. Anyways, our relationship never managed to move forward from that point and we eventually broke up, leaving us both with a lot of emotional scars.

Almost 2 years passed after that, by the time I had become deeply engrossed in all sorts of debasing and humiliating porn genres like chastity, cuckolding, sph etc. I knew I had fallen deep and I was slowly starting to accept who I am. This was when I met with my current girlfriend. She breated an air of life into my world and we got along really well. She managed to reduce my porn intake with her cheerful personality and positive outlook in life (unbeknownst to her actually).

Anyways, things were looking good until very recently. I was visiting a local cafe to get a cup of coffee when I ran into my ex-gf. She was with another man, who quite honestly was extremely good looking. She caught me staring at her and immediately recognized me. After that she came over to my table and asked how I've been. We caught up over how our individual lives had been since we last saw each other and I thought that would be the end.

But I was surprised to see that she wanted to introduce her "new boyfriend" to me. The guy told me his name and mentioned that he had come to the city for a new job. Apparently they both work in the same building and met each other one day in the elevator. Anyways, he seemed like a nice guy so we chatted for a bit.

After they left, a certain gnawing sensation that was creeping up in me ever since I got to talk to my ex started becoming more clear. I realized that maybe what I'm feeling was jealousy. But if it was just that then I would've brushed it off, the issue was that I could feel myself being aroused at the thought that he had stolen her away from me.

A little description about how they both looked, my ex is an asian(korean) woman who is about 5' 4 with dark black straight hair that she usually ties in a ponytail. She is quite petite but she maintains herself with a good diet and exercise. With a firm little bubble butt, 32 B tits and a sweet innocent voice she can easily be summed up as super cute.

The guy on the other hand was a white guy, he was about 6 ft with light brown hair, chiseled jaw and spectacles. I could sort of figure out he had a toned muscular body by how the clothes he wore would stretch and show a hint of the outline of his body structure.

I sat down at the table and started vacantly staring into space trying to imagine this and that. How they both might behave around each other in their privacy, how they might be sitting around and talking about how I was etc.

I could picture her sitting on his lap in his bed wearing nothing but her black camisole and cute white panties. Her butt would be comfortably pressed up on his massive 10 inch cock which would dig hard into her. He would hold her tightly with his thick muscular veiny arms and use one hand to slowly grope her tits.

They would sit in this position and kiss each other while their hands slowly starts to explore different parts of each others body. His fingers would slowly find its way to her soft fleshy mound. Gently caressing over it, he would make sure to explore every bit of wetness of her sweet juicy cunt.

After rubbing her for some time, a faint yet visible panting will start to appear on her breath. A moan might escape her mouth any moment, but he doesn't wait long enough for it. He suddenly grabs her waist with both hands and pushes her forward on the bed. With her face down and ass up she was now clearly offering herself at his mercy.

After kneeding her tight little ass a little more, he positioned his huge cock right against her dripping pussy and started grinding against it. The wetness of her panties could be felt by his throbbing cock. He pulls her panties to the side and slowly pushes his cock inside her, little by little. By the time he's a little more than halfway in, she would start gasping from the sheer girth of his member.

After making sure that she's a little adjusted to his size. He starts to piston himself slowly into her. As time goes on, the slow rhythmic pump gives itself away to a more powerful stroke of increasing speed and force. The clashing of his pelvis against her back has started to produce a loud sound with her ass jiggling at impact.

Loud moans starts to escape her mouth without her will as she fully relishes the feeling of reoccurring fullness inside her loins. She can't remember herself being this aroused with a man in her entire life. This was not just sex, this was submission for her. The might of his cock had reduced her to an animal that could only comprehend her own carnal pleasure.

The visual in my head felt so real that I could perfectly envision myself sitting in a room with them as well. I just sat there without any resistance while my ex was being fucked like a cheap slut. The crude lustful expression on her face was still one of a woman who's not aware of anything else except the cock that's been giving her pleasure.

I slowly got up from my seat to approach this alluring scene. My lips trembled with a slight quiver as I held her face between my palms. Never had I seen a woman more beautiful than the one infront of me. The passion welling up in me translated to a deep tender kiss on this woman who might not even be aware of my presence beside her.

With each second passing, I could taste the sweetness of her mouth but I was also acutely aware of a different taste, a taste of another man. Once again I am reminded, that she is no longer mine. The violent shaking of her body snapped me out of my stupor. It seems she was nearing her first climax.

She clutched on to my shirt with an intense tug and dug her face into my chest. Looking up from her excitement, I could see a glint of something else on her face. An expression of waiting, maybe waiting for my choice. I too realized soon what she meant. If this man were to continue doing to her what he's been doing so far, I would completely lose her. She wouldn't be able to hold even a tiny bit of space for me in her heart.

She was telling me to choose, a future with us together or a future without her. I thought the answer was simple and I went for a kiss on her lips. But just as I was reaching, I paused. My body did not move, my mind was perplexed. Perhaps my body knew more than my mind exactly what kind of person I was. The kiss for her lips moved upwards and landed on her forehead.

I slowly got up from the bed and moved back to my seat, back to my true role in life, as someone who is nothing but a viewer. The expression on her face tightened for a split second and then immediately softened. She had decided to respect my choice and was gonna honor it by granting me a wonderful sight.

The man behind her, the better man amongst us both should win. He celebrated his victory over me by moving more faster than before like a man who's lost all inhibitions. He grabbed her by the hair and pulled her closer to himself. Their lips met with a fiery passion and they were now closing in on a mutual intense orgasm.

I watched from my seat as they both let out a guttural groan as she flooded the bed from her squirting and he filled her up with thick potent seed. The moment lasted for a few seconds, the entire time they held each other like their lives depended up on it.

It was like the world had gone silent and the only thing I could hear was the faint panting from the woman I used to love. The man behind her slowly loosened his grip on her and she collapsed on to the bed from the exhaustion of her climax. He too seemed a little winded but it was clear as day that he hadn't had enough.

He got up from the bed and approached me. He then asked me to leave as I no longer had a right to stay and watch what was about to happen. I had relinquished everything I had over her to this man. He was the master, he was the keyholder, he made the rules and now I had to leave.

As I walked out of the room, I paused for a bit. Maybe I had made the wrong choice, maybe I should rethink it. But then I felt a push from behind me and I started falling, a fall that seemed to take forever. But during my fall, I once again reaffirmed my own decision. There was no turning back, this was the revelation that will change my life. I will find my true self. I will become a viewer in life.

I woke up from my day dream and realized that I was still sitting at the cafe. Some time had passed and my remaining coffee had gone completely cold. With a million racing thoughts in my mind, I got up. I had decisions to make in my life. Things to see, things to talk about etc. I paid the bill, took my coat and quietly walked away into the night.