Abigail's Awakening Pt. 04

"Hey Booya."

"Booya," Jack repeated back. "Hey Abby."

"How's your day? It will be better if you let me take you for a walk during your break."

"What for?"

"I want to share my love of nature with you."

"Okay, but I have to be back by noon and not a second later."

She closed up shop and left a written sign saying what time she would be back. She skipped a little on her way to Jack's car, a black 2022 Toyota Camry that she thought looked pretty good for a guy his age. They drove to Riverside Park.

They walked together amongst the gnarly oak trees that were the signature of that location. She asked him, "Why isn't just being a Christian good enough for you? Why do you have to be a witch as well?"

"I just feel called to do so. I dunno. I like it, and I hope God still loves me for who I am."

"But what is He doesn't, and you have to burn in Hell for eternity, just because you had to be a witch?"

"If that's the way it's supposed to be, I'd be happy to burn. Better to burn than to not be true to my calling. In the end, I will burn with love for God, and nothing else."

His words shook her in some deep way, the firmness of his self-made convictions pressed against the softness of her own pre-construed faith. She had her parents to thank for who she was. He appeared to be his own man.

Maybe that was why, when his hand flashed across the space between them and took her hand in his, interlacing their fingers together... maybe that was why she didn't pull away.

"What are you doing?"

"If you want me to stop, let go."

"I think I want you to stop."

"Then let go."

Instead, she held on, enjoying his touch. It was rather insignificant, holding hands, anyway. Not a sin, and not punishable by anything. Nor was it a betrayal of anyone, except maybe Jack himself, because she would never marry him.

For ten minutes they held hands, and finally he was the one to let go. "I like you, Abby."

"I know you do. But it's not going to do you any good."

"Why does your body tell me one thing, while your mind says the exact opposite."

"It doesn't matter what my body says. It matters what I say. I could never marry a witch."

"And I could never ask you to. But I could..."

"You could what?"

"Oh nothing, really. Just wishful thinking, that's all."

"Keep me outta your wishes, remember."

"I just wish you could accept yourself for who you truly are. Our relationship wouldn't have to last forever in order for us to have a meaningful connection that could change both our lives for the better."

"I am who I am. Remember that. I didn't make it out of high school a virgin by accident. And I didn't wait this long just to give it up to a silver-tongued serpent like yourself."

"You might regret this someday."

"Yeah, maybe, but so what? If I was anything more than a piece of meat to you, you'd respect my feelings and desires."

"Abby, you're so much more than a piece of meat to me. You know that." He reached out to take her hand again, but this time she rejected him.

"Time to go," she said.

When they got back to the shoppe, Tim was waiting patiently outside. It was an awkward moment, getting out of Jack's car with Tim watching curiously, but she blew it off. "My childhood friend Jack," she said, lying to Tim now.

"How can I help you...was it Tim?"

"That's right. Nice to see you again, Abigail."

"I hope you didn't come all this way just to talk about your dad," was the closest she could bring herself to being a flirt.

"No, but I was looking for a book. "City of God" by St. Augustine. Do you have it?"

"I do believe so. Is it a gift for your girlfriend?"

"What? No, nothing like that."

"Well, do you have a girlfriend?" she asked and followed up the question with a wink.

"No, I'm single."

"What's a handsome fella like yourself doing without a girlfriend. That's a shame.". She was a little better at this than she thought.

"Oh I dunno. I guess I just haven't met the right person yet."

"Or maybe you have and you just don't know it yet. Hey, I just thought of something. We should catch dinner and a movie sometime. We can call it a date."

"Do you really want to?"

"Yes, I do. I may be cruel, but I'm not that cruel. I'm not going to pretend to ask you out just to throw it back in your face when you say yes."

"I'd really like to go on a date with you. You're really pretty, and you seem very smart and nice too."

"Thanks for the compliment, Timmy. Tomorrow's Friday. I want you to pick me up from work tomorrow and we can go straight to the matinee. They're doing a re-release of The Passion of the Christ at the movie theatre tomorrow afternoon. We can catch it at 3pm, and make it out in time for dinner. If we still have appetites after the Passion, that is."

"I loved the Passion of the Christ. It really inspires me to endure my suffering like a man, with equanimity and forgiveness."

"I'm glad we can agree on this."

He left the shoppe, having forgotten to buy the book he came for, and Abigail wondered at that, but let it go. She was secretly excited to go on this date. But she was also thinking about Jack a little here and there too. She liked his soft hands, and she knew Tim's hands would not be soft at all. She told herself the strength was more important than any softness, and she assured herself she was choosing the right man. It wasn't even a choice, really, it was just obvious.

She went home and got into her bathing suit to go for a swim. She looked at herself in the mirror, and remembered flashes of her dream from last night, but not its message. She thought that if she started dating Tim, she might graduate to a bikini. The other men couldn't stare at her with that hunk of a man at her side, could they. She even thought it might be nice to show off her appeal to Tim, hoping he would appreciate it without appreciating it too much.

She got in the swimming pool and swam her evening laps. She got out of the pool and bathed in the sun for awhile. She saw her dad in the window and waved. He waved back. She turned onto her stomach. When she turned back over, ten minutes later, her dad was still there in the window. She thought he must have a lot on his mind, to be acting weirdly, just looking outside at nothing at all. Usually he was busy with papers from work or little projects around the house.

She went inside and made green curry stir fry for dinner.

"So," she said, preemptively, "I have a date tomorrow."

"Oh, that's wonderful, honey."

"Is it with Deacon John's son?" her dad asked

"Yeah. His name's Tim. We're gonna go see the Passion of the Christ and then get dinner afterwards."

"That's amazing, honey. This is such a great opportunity for you to explore dating with someone you can trust."

"Just remember," her dad said. "You didn't have to decide on forever in a day. Just have fun and get to know him a bit. Forever can wait for your relationship to develop."

"Thanks Mom and Dad. I'm so glad you're supportive of this choice. It was hard for me to make, but I think it's time I took another step into adulthood. I think Tim will be the perfect guy for me to do that with. Regardless of whether it ends in a happy marriage and a slew of screaming babies."

"Oh honey," her mother said, tittering. " You have such a gifted imagination."

That night her imagination went back to work. She had her most obscene dream yet. An angel took her up from her wandering a barren earthen landscape, and set her down on a cloud in the sky. Once there, Jesus appeared to her. She bowed down and kissed his feet. He wasn't satisfied with that though, because when she looked up from his feet, she was kneeling at eye-level with his crotch, and his penis was pointing straight at her face.

Jesus made a lewd gesture with his tongue in his cheek, letting her know what he wanted her to do. She felt fear, fear that she held such a great responsibility as the Almighty Cock in her mouth. She sucked fervently, but held something important back, as if she didn't want to hurt Him.

He got sick of her half-hearted attempt at a blowjob, and He pushed her onto her back, so that she lay naked on a fluffy cloud in the sky. He took the lead and mounted her. He slid his cock into the thing between her legs, and the look in His eyes told her He was in heaven. She took His come inside of her, and afterwards, laying now alone on the cloud, she kept her legs aloft, hoping his seed would soak down into her ovaries.

She felt funny when she woke up, like she'd inadvertently committed blasphemy, but she had to pass it off as just another dream and go about her day.

She awoken to a seemingly empty house. Mother, she knew, was out with an early office meeting, but her dad was still home yet, right?

She checked their bedroom, no one, then there garage, still no one, but his car was still in its stall. He must be home.

Lastly, she checked his office. Not knowing why, she tiptoed down the stairs, wanting to sneak up and surprise him if he was working in his office. She slowly opened the door, seeing that he was in there by the outline of the back of his head. But before she could burst in and say "Surprise!" the door creaked and alerted him to her presence. His left hand flashed out and closed his laptop really quickly. She was confused -- what did he have to hide? -- and even more confused when he didn't turn to face her, but sat facing away and spoke to her: "Hey Abby, I'll be up for breakfast in a minute."

"What's wrong Dad? You're acting weird."

"I just have some stressful work I'm doing that I can't share with anyone. It's not the end of the world, but I do need to get it done. He turned his head and looked over his shoulder, awkwardly contorting himself instead in just turning around in his swivel chair.

She closed the door, harboring an uneasy feeling deep behind her navel. She knew what it had looked like, but she couldn't allow herself to nurse the possibility. It was all too much to think about. She hadn't just caught her father masturbating, had she? It couldn't be. It just couldn't.

Mom would be devastated that Dad was going to go to Hell. No, there was a simple explanation for his behavior, and it had nothing to do with self-pleasure.

They ate in remote silence, until she broke it with her usual blunt line of engagement. "You've been acting kind of weird lately, dad. I'd everything all right?"

"What do you mean, hon? How have I been acting weird? Well, yesterday you sat in the window for at least a half hour while I was swimming, not doing anything, just looking at the sky. That's not like you not to keep busy with something or other."

"I just wanted to remember that moment forever, when my little girl was still a little girl and not all grown up like you're getting so fast. I just wanted to be with you in that moment. It does sound kind of weird, but can you look at it from my perspective? It's hard watching your child become an adult."

"Makes sense. I'm sorry I questioned you, and I'm sorry I have to grow up, too."

She thought about not saying what came next, but she had grown into a natural boldness over the past few years, and since high school especially, so she said, " I could've sworn I saw you playing with yourself in your office earlier."

"What do you mean, playing with myself?"

"I mean, masturbating. I can't believe you'd do that, but that's just what it looked like to me. Like, why couldn't you turn around to face me, and what was on your computer screen that you needed to hide so quickly?"

"I cannot answer those questions right now, but you're going to have to trust me, Abby, I wasn't playing with myself in any way shape or form. That kind of sin is not welcome in our household, a rule you are long familiar with."

"And one I don't mind following. Self-pleasure is one of the easiest sins to avoid, when your head is in the right place."

"That it is, my darling. Me and your mom really trust you when you say that you've saved yourself for marriage. It's really important to us that you don't degenerate into bad sexual habits while you wait."

"Is it ever okay to play with yourself? Like, what if you were married and you did it together?"

"God wants sexual congress to be for child-making only. Pleasure is just a lucky side effect that we can't let ourselves make too much of."

"You know, if you were pleasuring yourself, I'd forgive you, as long as you promised to never do it again."

"I promise I've never done it period. A rule is a rule, and we all have to follow it in this house. Now, let's talk about something a bit more appropriate."

"Good idea, Dad. I'm so lucky to have your guidance in life."

"You're very welcome, my darling."

She went to work and opened up shop, bringing a change of clothes with her for her date later on. Booya was already waiting outside the shop, and it looked like he was impatient to see her. "Oh Jack," she said to herself, sighing, "how can I help you?"

TO BE CONTINUED