All Comments on 'AMA - The Divorcee: Day 10'

How does this series not have the harem tag? Cause that's what Jay's got, even if he doesn't think that way about it.

@Frethnor Just completely forgetting to put it on my part XD I'll add them in subsequent compilations from here on. Thanks for pointing it out!

You're all over the place and bringing in too much crap. It was great withe the girls and the app but the Dom cuck crap and not staying to the story line got you a 1

@1thaiguy I see. That's fair. This is the first story I've ever written, so I tried introducing other genres to the story to see what I can be good at writing and to add some variety to scenes. I tried to at least introduce those elements organically as part of the story. If you see them as distractions and not something that can be part of the storyline later, then I see that as the part I have to improve in my writing. Again, thank you for the feedback!

I’ve been enjoying the series so far. I can see 1thaiguy’s point, but the world building hasn’t been that bad. Granted the dom stuff isn’t for everyone. I’m more curious about the app and what you’ll do with it and how that will develop his relationships with all the girls. Anyways, keep up the good work.

Yeah~ I think this was the point in the story where the app took a back seat and I got that feedback from some of my readers on the original site as well. I do get back to it around Day 12 I think, but I understand if people tuned out by then since I am aware of the length it took to get back to what readers want as the focal point of the story, since it is about a guy that discovers an app that changes his life. Thank you for the feedback!

The further it goes, the worse it gets. The long dialogue with the jerk Chad impressed both the length and the reaction of the main character. The character looks more and more like a teenager the farther he goes. Yes, he has a lot of girlfriends, but the character of an idiot who is happy with everyone, trusts everyone, is not going to think with his head.