Betrayed by Her Stockings - Rewrite

I tried to work through it. I made myself available to have sex whenever he was there. He would come in from nightshift and I would suggest, carefully then very carefully, he get a workout before going to sleep. Over time he even resented that. His tone of voice was belittling. Before the little girl case, I gave up trying to entice him to our bed due to his reactions. I'm sure when we did have sex, it was more about his relief than any pleasure for me.

Mark says in his part, he thought I just wanted it over and done with quickly. The person who wanted that was Mark. I wanted our lovemaking to be as it was, about pleasuring each other, he just wanted to cum and roll over. I was just a receptacle.

Mark said in his re-write, he knew our sex life had changed but he has never worked out why. The laid back, horizontal Mark he told you about no longer existed. This one could be cruel so easily. If he actually listened to his friends at parties, he would have heard so many asking why I was putting up with the way he was treating me. "Who was that Mark?" was a frequent question. More than one asked me if he was having an affair. I never thought that of him. Was I mistaken?

Gaslighting is what a number of female friends told me he was doing. I was always criticised, always wrong. Even some of his male friends challenged him about it. Nothing changed for the better.

I struggled sexually as I had told him I needed that element of being in control on occasion. Before that bloody case, we shared those experiences, we both had times being in control or even just giving into our lust. We couldn't even do that latterly.

It was not only our sex life I wasn't allowed control off, but he soon started to criticise everything, from my clothes to my friends to our holidays. There were days I wondered about where we were heading. I hoped he would be moved from that bloody unit and my Mark would come back. That hope was all that sustained me.

The case with the young girl was my breaking point and I realise now left me vulnerable. He was like a bear with a sore head for the length of the enquiry. I couldn't do anything right. I couldn't give him a hug let alone a fuck. I could understand his desire to catch the bastard but he was destroying us!

Mark points out about my stockings and how it was those which betrayed me. I had reached the stage that I wasn't going to do anything to entice or promote sex. When I did, I was treated with such total distain by him, his words were almost as cutting as the day he threw me out. About the only word he didn't call me was "whore."

He says I never made any offers, that I should have massaged his back (I wanted to) but I was so scared to do so as I would be verbally abused yet again.

This was when I met Ray Laing. Talk about misery meeting misery.

The restaurant was very busy one lunchtime and he asked if he could sit with me. I agreed. We tried to be polite as we shared the table. He made a comment which made me laugh. He said, "You are beautiful when you smile. What's causing so much heartache?"

I shrugged it off but it had started a conversation. I enjoyed his company. To be honest, in other circumstances Mark would get along well with Ray. There is a humour and a desire about life which Mark used to have.

I admit I found myself wearing my more sensual stockings as Ray made me feel good about myself, something Mark seldom did now. I never wore them for a sexual nature until the day we were busted.

Over the next few weeks we often sat together and if I'm truthful, I looked forward to meeting Ray. I could speak without getting my head bitten off. I know I shouldn't have but I opened up a little about the problems Mark and I had. I admitted to Ray that I loved to have a chance at being in control in our sex life but I wasn't allowed to be in control anymore. In fact we had no sex life that was worth speaking about.

I blamed myself as Mark was my soulmate yet I couldn't help him see what was happening to us.

Ray understood. He never made a move on me despite what you are thinking.

Ray opened his misery story to me.

He explained he suffered from a similar situation but in reverse. His wife Sheila was part of the Laing family. He now worked for her father as a salesman at their biggest car dealership. He had to sell three times as many cars as her brothers to earn the same commission. Whenever she went to a board meeting, her father would list all Ray's failings and she would lap it up. She would give him hell when he came home. He was always telling her to check the actual figures and she would see he was a bloody good salesman, the best they had by far. If he left, they would see his value.

Needless to say, their love life was poor. He took the blame for that. He had a small penis about 41/2 inches when hard. He loved eating her out and always ensured she was satisfied. He was happy to use toys on her if she wished. He had a quirk which at first she had liked. He loved to eat his cum from her pussy or arse giving her more pleasure. She must have told her friends because they had told her it was disgusting so she stopped him doing it even though she had loved it. She never ever blew him and only on very special occasions did she even touch his penis.

Although he loves her he was thinking seriously about whether or not they had a future together.

Even then it was weeks later we actually began what Mark calls an affair. I don't! I don't know what to call it but it wasn't an affair!

All of the hotel expenses on the credit card bills were for lunch. We shared those. There was never any thought other than friendly support initially. We did meet more often during Mark's nightshifts over the last six weeks.

Now before we get any further, remember everything I'm telling you is the truth. Mark has the tapes to prove it yet he hasn't watched them. If he had fucking well let me explain and watched them perhaps we wouldn't be a few weeks from appearing in court to argue for and against a divorce. I'm hoping for the court to order joint counselling but I'm reconciled to the fact that the only word used will be 'divorced'.

Maybe when he reads this he will consider counselling. I hope so and I wish he will at least speak to me. I still love him with all my heart.

Ray and I were speaking one day, perhaps six or seven weeks before the bust, about our mutual sexual release problems when one of us, it may have been me, it may have been him, and I'm putting it in context not names as we were both responsible, we said, "We're compatible. Neither of us wants an affair, we love our spouses. One needs to exert some control and the other needs to be controlled. We would never have penetrative sex. We could decide on parameters, whether touching breasts, pussies, bum, penis was allowed. Kissing, groping, mutual masturbation? Perhaps a hand job to give some relief, coming over panties or bare flesh. Ray would lick the cum up. He needed to be used. I needed to be in charge."

We talked about it over several lunches. It was a big step, open to misinterpretation, danger if we broke our rules. I allowed my needs to overrule my judgement.

Over time we settled on the following which is all you will see on Mark's videos. They won't make for enticing viewing, wouldn't be viewed on porn sites.

For the avoidance of any doubt, I never at any time, had Ray's penis in my mouth, my cunt or my arse. We had ruled out kissing, cuddling, groping, mutual masturbation as being too personal. All I wanted was to have some time where I was in control. I didn't need to cum or even be aroused.

Ray needed to feel used, almost abused (which I wasn't happy with as he's a very nice man). The only contact physically with Ray was him licking his sperm from my tits (mostly from my bra) or off my panties. He never tried to go beyond that, always kept it gentle and away from sensitive parts. Ray never groped my breasts or my pussy.

I did wank him off several times because it fitted the scenario.

My preference would have been doing all this and more with Mark. Ray wanted to do this with his wife and hoped she would give him a blowjob or even just play with his penis but that was beneath her dignity.

Each time we had different scenarios, stories to heighten and guide our experiences. We talked through these but the actions were all very similar. Some came from Literotica. Our lunches were part of that experience, making up our story, part of taking or giving control up.

I would, at the most, be topless. Mostly I kept my sheer bra on unless it was a dominant scenario. My panties stayed on bar once. I took off my stockings and suspenders. Only on the last occasion did I keep my suspenders and stockings on and removed my panties.

The first stage involved Ray wanking over my tits. Some scenarios had me toying with him verbally, a loving teasing him until he came. I would tell him how pleased I was at his offering but we should share it. I would crouch over him and let his cum drop into his mouth. Then he would lick it off (bra). If I was dominant, it had me demeaning him, only reluctantly allowing him to cum over my tits. I would grab his hair and forcibly rub his face in it before having him lick my bare tits clean. Throughout we kept our words to the storyline.

To get him hard again, I would mostly talk dirty to him. He responded quickly to being forced to eat cum from a pussy or arse, especially when I said it was Sheila's. He would cum over my panties. Sometimes over my mons (not my pussy lips) or sometimes over my bum. He never came inside my panties, always on the outside.

One scenario we both liked was me dreaming of a handsome man, watching me, wanking over my tits. I would rub the cum over my tits and hold my hand over my pussy as though I was masturbating. Ray would get hard as I talked about what my dream man (Mark) was doing. Ray would cum over my tits and clean them with his tongue but more often over my panties.

I went home from those ones hoping Mark would instigate sex with me.

I would wear sheer panties for Ray. Ray said he couldn't see all my pussy because of the cotton gusset. I cut the cotton out on three pairs so he could see my pussy lips. I didn't make them crotchless. I had him describe what he was feeling and seeing as he wanked, how he was going to cum.

Ray talked about fucking his wife's pussy or arse and how she would then sit on his face and have him eat her to more orgasms. He always came more when he described her giving him a blowjob. One fantasy he had was her fucking him with a strap-on.

About a month before we were busted, we were talking and Ray said my pussy was fantastic but he could only see so much due to the trimmed hair. My labia lips looked lovely but he thought if it was bare, he would see the lips better and be able to cum more. I thought about it and thought, my panties weren't coming off what was the harm.

Mark said I never shaved it for him, but he never asked nor suggested it. Even after I shaved all of him, while he stayed hair free, he never suggested it to me. I should have asked him though. My fault.

I could get Ray to cum quickly if I brushed my fingers over my pussy, on the outside of my panties. I never masturbated for Ray. I kept that for Mark and Mark alone, even although he had never asked me to in months.

I liked to give Ray a lap dance practising for when I could with Mark (I couldn't just instigate one after all). I never touched Ray's body though I could feel his breath as I offered myself to him. When I licked my breasts he would tell me he was going to cum. I would turn and he would cum over my pantie clad bum.

Most times Ray could only manage to get hard twice. If we had time, I would read some stories for him from Literotica and he sometimes came again. On bare tits very occasionally, sheer bra, pantie clad pussy or bum. He loved my panties so mostly it was on them. He licked the cum off.

Sheila's panties apparently were sensible cotton monsters.

In total, I think our mutual sexual relief sessions totalled no more than ten times before we were caught.

During our lunches I tried to get Ray to realise he needed help with his low self-esteem. He was too nice a person to need to be abused. His lack of penis size defined him but his personality was far bigger. He was going to look at getting help. If he did, I'm sure these sessions would have ended soon.

Now, Mark has told you what we were doing on the day we were busted. There is a story to that so please allow me to tell it. Don't jump to conclusions.

A couple of weeks before the bust, Ray seemed very anxious. He said that he hated that his birthday was coming up and that his wife had spoken about going out for a meal with her parents and her brothers. He would be the butt of their jokes. He tried to say they should have a romantic evening by themselves but that hadn't gone down well.

I asked when it was and no surprise it was the day we were busted. If only it was the day after or before they would only have found our normal scenario in play. I told him I would try and give him a memorable birthday present before he had to meet her family, "What would you wish?"

Ray said, "I know this would be a one off and never repeated but I would love to kiss and caress your pussy, cum over it and fuck you with a face dildo so you have some fun too. You have never cum in our time together or had any physical contact in that way. I want you to have some pleasure. My cum would fall onto my face. If you could rub your stockings over my penis I would be in heaven."

I know it was a major step in the wrong direction, especially that dildo, but it would definitely be a one off. Neither of us wanted to destroy our marriages by having an affair.

I thought it over for a few days and told Ray when we met up, I would do it.

"Ray, you can eat me through my panties and once I cum, I'll take them off so you can cum over my mons. We'll move so you can fuck me with the face dildo and I can caress your penis. When you need to cum again, you can cum over my stockings."

I rationalised that when he did that I could fantasise that it was Mark as he had loved cumming over my stockings. I couldn't see Mark with a face dildo and frankly I never want to.

Apart from having me make him lick his cum off my tits or panties, Ray had never touched any part of my body, never kissed my pussy lips until that fateful day, albeit through my panties.

On the day, we were both so excited. I felt so in control. Ray was getting his present.

I started with being dominant. I pushed Ray onto the bed and straddled his face. I lightly drew my fingers over my sheer panties, teasing my labia lips. I told him what he was to do, really demeaned him. His face showed his enjoyment, his love at having no control. His eyes seldom left my face even though my pussy lips were fully displayed to him. I must have taken at least five minutes to tease him before sitting down with my pantie clad pussy onto his face.

Ray was very good at eating pussy though I did berate his efforts. Not like Mark and I never came like I cum with Mark. In fact I didn't cum at all as I didn't have the time. My domination meant Ray was very quickly at the stage he was about to cum. I quickly moved to the side of him, took off my panties and I held his penis as I directed his cum over my mons above my clit hood.

I moved so that my pussy was above Ray's head as he grabbed the face dildo and put it on. I was so wet; I didn't need the lube he had with him but he used it anyway. I straddled his face and I admit I enjoyed the feeling of control. It wasn't a big dildo, maybe six inches but I was enjoying it.

It had been sometime since Mark had even looked at me sexually. His nightshifts allowed me to play with my sex toys to get some relief. I will admit thinking about the control sessions with Ray made me cum stronger though it was Mark's face and body I fantasised about rather than Ray's.

It was an awkward position as although I could face fuck Ray driving the dildo into me, I couldn't use my stockings to caress his penis. We managed to move to a position which allowed him to have the dildo in me and where his cum was dripping onto him. As he moved his head only a few inches of the dildo was in my cunt but my feet were able to caress his penis. This was his birthday present after all, not about my pleasure. We hadn't been in that awkward position long when his wife burst in.

I was mortified. Naked in front of six strangers. Ray was still trying to fuck me with the dildo while lapping his own cum. He hadn't noticed.

When a really angry woman, Mrs Laing asked if I was Mrs Stephanie Thomson, I lost any composure as I knew Mark would now know everything.

Mrs Laing and the woman with her asked me questions and I answered them. Like Mark, they didn't believe that we had never had sex. That today was his birthday present, a one off treat. I told her everything including how Ray felt she and her family despised him. That didn't go down well.

I dressed. Ray was still naked. His wife started on him but he had had enough. He started to answer her back in spades laying out why this had happened. I knew he was trying to protect me.

The woman escorted me out so I don't know all that was said. I told her again we hadn't had sex. Today was his birthday and this was a one off treat for him.

I went home and couldn't face telling Mark the truth. I felt so ashamed. Not only at being caught but the fact our life together had brought me to that point. How had our relationship which started in the furthest reaches of the galaxy reached the sewer?

If I had waited, gathered my thoughts and explained everything, there may have been a small chance of a reconciliation. I wasted that chance.

Now, for those haters that have to "Burn the Bitch" everything is true. I love Mark but I needed some tender loving care for my needs. There was never one fleeting thought that I would ever make love with Ray. He loved his wife. I love Mark but I needed my needs addressed.

Mark has the tapes to prove all I have said.

For the avoidance of doubt especially those who still think I am a whore. The three lovers I have had do not include Ray. I have allowed men to pet my breasts and pussy on occasion when I have been involved with them. Never in the first couple of weeks, only when I felt it may go somewhere. I am always exclusive; I don't date multiple men. No man other than Mark has touched me sexually since we have been together.

For full disclosure of why I was able to rationalise what Ray and I were doing. It wasn't an affair! I need to return to the last year of my marriage.

Since that dominatrix case, Mark listened less and less to me. Every time I brought the subject of us up, I was belittled, often shouted at, I was always wrong. I was side lined. We never went walking or even to the football in the months before this happened. Mark admits in his version, he did set out to antagonise me when he found the damning evidence on my panties. It had started long before then, I assure you. I just don't think he realised due to that fucking sexual offences unit fucking with his brain!

I know what I did was wrong. I know I hurt Mark in so many ways. I accept the blame; I made the choice. I wish I had spoken out to Mark more forcefully in the beginning as things went wrong between us about my needs, not just sexual, needing to be met not just his own. Pointed out how his job was changing him, his personality, our relationship. I wasn't the only one he was short with, ask his friends, even his parents. Remember "Who is this Mark?" "Was he having an affair?"

For other spouses reading this, don't do what I did. Speak to them, tell them your needs, accept their needs and work together. Explore your needs together. Don't think good wives/husbands don't do this, think what arouses your partner embrace it. Forget what other people say. Don't let outsiders decide what happens in your marriage.