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"Fuck. Joni...do you know how much I want you?"
He replaced his finger with his thumb and vibrated it against her, rubbing back and forth rapidly over the sensitive skin.
"Fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuckkkk." He held her palm against his lips as she tipped over the edge, crashing into her orgasm at full speed. His thumb slowed and he stroked her gently as she relaxed, her body shuddering in the aftershocks.
"Is there room in there for me?" He stood to unbutton the front of his shirt as Joni's face broke out in a reluctant smile.
- COMMENTS
Anonymousover 3 years agoHe’s not a White Night or a Good Guy if he was he’d have helped the authorities to shut down this fucking nightmare and he wouldn’t have been a selfish prick by keeping her there. Just wow, sorry you’re permanently terrified for your life, I could have got you out ages ago but I’m attracted to you. There are no words to cover just how much of a bastard he is.
Tbh i had him pegged as an undercover federal agent aka the mysterious W/K, when it was said he was so violent he just made girls disappear. I didn’t see him as a victim first so that definitely came as a surprise. The entire thing is sinister and fucked up. At least he was being honest when he said he wasn’t a good guy....but Stockholm Syndrome.
He is undoubtedly a victim to some degree but the sick bastards in charge made him culpable. The best thing about this fantasy is that it’s possible to make the bad guys pay for what they’ve done.
rosenglassover 3 years agoAbsolute highest praise!
The last scene was so immersive that it gave me those elusive full-body, wavelike tingles. Don't rush it, but I can't wait to see what you do with a scene longer than half a page.
My only suggestion is: if you're planning on continuing this series a good while longer then I would spend some time developing a few background characters. I know we have Marni and 2, and they're enough for a 6 part story, but they will start feeling cold and stoney the longer the story goes, at least to me. They're in a terrible situation and should eventually show cracks. Hell, I wouldn't even be opposed to a change of perspective if Joni does get out.
Arcadia Castle is a great example of spinning in side characters to flesh out the world and give a sort of cadence to the main characters' interaction.
Anonymousover 3 years agoI doubt there are any true White Knights in this series. Just because 4 is not the worst of the evils in this story, it doesn’t automatically make him a good guy. If one rapist kidnaps the girl from her home, rapes her through out the night, and then politely returns her to her home vs. a second rapist who kidnaps the girl from her home, rapes her throughout the night, kills her, and throws her corpse in the gutter...which one is not a rapist? So while I’m sure he’ll be the glowing antihero we should all stop with the White Knight stuff.
Now that we have put this behind us, we can all just enjoy the great writing and exciting storyline the author is creating for us. And my sincere thanks for her efforts and willingness to share so freely.
LunaScarletover 3 years agoLove where the story is going!
Their chemistry jumps off the page, it's so hot!
Great job creating realistic and human characters that keep us invested in the story! There are so many stories like yous on this site, but the characters and story always end up being one dimensional, it's refreshing to read something different! 5* as usual!
