All Comments on 'Breeding Story for My Wife'

Your use of the "First-person-singular-descriptive-regurgative-dangling-participle", or whatever you call it when you describe back to a person what they are doing while they do it, is very disconcerting and off-putting to the reader (me). Tell me what she is doing, don't tell her. She already knows what she is doing!

I know that it is just a simplistic little stroke-story, nut it turns to mush when you use that writing style. NO! I will not be reading any more of your stuff. 1*

Quoted straight from Literotica category page "Loving Wives - Married extra-marital fun: swinging, sharing & more. (41550)"

Please move into Romance or some other category. 1 Star because this happens all too often that writers can write but can't grasp simple irony or intentionally ignore it.

A wasted first effort.

Nobody cares that it's a "true" story. We don't believe you, and it adds nothing to the story.

So another man needs to make your wife horny. You should just Jim Jones yourself since you can't function as a real man.

Second person stories suck.

If something like that gets your wife going she has as many problems as you do.

Wow! The other commenters are psychopaths on here lol. Don’t let them get you down. I got very wet from this story and I wouldn’t mind reading more.

Short and boring.