Can Married Couples Date?

"Steady on, mate," Clive snorted. "A little less of the insults, aye. Nobody said anything derogatory to you."

"That's because I'm the only one talking sense; you morons are carrying on like dicks. There's no way in hell I would let one of you reprobates take my wife anywhere."

"I've had enough of the shit, Sonny. I think you should leave. Come back when you're thinking clearly," Joe said forcefully. "I dunno what's come over you, mate, but that shit's uncalled for."

Sonny snorted fiercely, "Don't you bloody worry, mate. I'll be glad to get out of this nuthouse." He glanced over at Helle, who looked totally discombobulated. "Come on, lets get the hell out of here."

"Sonny, I have to help clean up and get my plates," Helle said, embarrassed by this sudden macho bullshit.

"Get them later, come on. We're not staying here a moment longer," Sonny stated in a rancorous bark.

Helle rushed around the group giving them all hugs. She apologised as she went, saying sorry over and over. Sonny had already walked over to the front door and waited impatiently.

Finally in the car, Sonny exploded. "What the hell was that all about in there? Was that something you girls already talked about?"

"Don't be daft. I was as shocked as you," she spat back angrily. His outburst had left her feeling ashamed and embarrassed.

"Then why the hell did you agree to that?"

"I don't know what your problem is, Sonny, but I thought it sounded like fun." She tried to keep the exasperation from her voice, but it flowed out, and once she started she couldn't stop.

"You were so bloody rude in there. Those people are our best friends, we're closer to them than we are with our family. Okay, if you didn't like the idea, you just had to say so. You didn't need to be insulting."

Sonny was incensed, and he didn't bother to try and mask it. "That bloody Marissa, she's such a drama queen. She watches all that shit on TV, and now she's trying to create that drama in our lives. She needs a good kick up the arse."

"Wow, settle petal. I don't know what's crawled up your arse and died, but you can stop right now. She is my friend, yours as well. What the hell's wrong with going out with them? Shit, I go out for drinks and that with Marissa and Jade quite a lot and you never complain. What's the difference?"

"Married men and women don't go out on dates with married people. We go out as a group. Jesus, Helle, she watches programs like that ridiculous Wife Swap. And she's trying to recreate it here."

"For Pete's sake, Sonny. There's no sex, you heard her. It would be just a night out and a chance to get better acquainted with our friends' partners."

"Oh yeah, sneaky bitch. I bet she wants to get better acquainted. Fucking slut. I don't know who she's got her eye on, but she's not dragging us into it."

"Sonny, how dare you? That woman is my friend. She does not deserve to be spoken about like that. What she suggested was some harmless fun between a bunch of very dear friends. Don't you ever speak like that about her again."

"This is ridiculous, Helle. I don't know why we're even talking about it. I think once the others have had chance to consider it, they will pull back."

Helle just shook her head in total disbelief. She was completely blown away by his outburst. "That may be the case. We will wait and see. If they ever speak to you again, that is. I can't believe the way you carried on. What the hell was that all about?"

"Me..." Sonny growled. "It was bloody stupid. The way you all jumped on board. You threw me under the bus. You didn't even ask me."

"Why would I? Good heavens, babe, there was nothing to get so upset over. Gee, it would have been nice."

"Nice... Who the fuck are you? Who stole my wife?" Sonny snarled as he slid the car to a halt in their drive way. "Where did all this shit come from. You tell them you feel cheated because you never dated anyone. Then suddenly you're dying to go on dates with our friends... What the fuck, Helle?"

"I never said I was cheated... Yeah, I admit I wonder what going on a date would have felt like. Really, all I wanted was for you to take the hint. We never do anything for ourselves anymore. I thought you might like to do something, but no. You chose to do nothing."

"I wasn't being guilted into it. I was going to do it. I was just waiting."

"Well, tomorrow, you better apologise to the guys at golf, and hope they're still talking to you."

"Fuck them. If they can't take that, they're not mates."

Confused by his blasé attitude, she chided, "I don't think you realise how hurtful your comments were."

That was a sleepless night for them both. Sonny tossed and turned restlessly. He knew his reaction was over the top, but he found the idea completely abhorrent. One of his friends taking his wife on a date. It went completely against everything he accepted as his code of ethics.

Some of that came from his parents. They had arrived in NZ fifty years earlier, refugees from Iran.

They weren't strict Muslims, but like most refugees, they kept the faith loosely. If his mother heard about this, she would be disgusted. God knows what his father would say.

In the morning, Sonny decided he would go for a run. He wasn't going to play golf. Hah, mates. If they were going to accept the stupidity of, Marissa's suggestion, they were no mates of his.

Helle slept in. Her sleepless night left her feeling tired. Sonny was gone when she rose. 'God, I hope he is sensible enough to apologise,' she said to herself as she filled the washing machine. She got breakfast for herself and the kids, who were moping around. The kids were waiting to go off with their friends for the day. Amy was heading to a netball tournament. Kirk was off skateboarding with some mates.

That left Helle free to go and meet the girls at the wine bar for lunch. She felt terrible about the previous night. Sonny had behaved like a real arse and made a complete fool of himself. In truth, she felt embarrassed by the way he flew off the handle.

Sucking in a big breath, she walked into the bar. The girls were already there. When they saw her they all jumped up and hugged her. There were even some tears.

"God, what happened last night?" Marissa asked.

"I don't know. I can't explain it. I have never seen him act like that. It was so over the top. I'm sorry, Marissa. I hope you can forgive us."

"Don't be silly. It wasn't your fault. Of course we forgive him. Joe said he was going to talk to him today. See if they can iron out what happened."

"Oh god." Helle sighed. "Thank god. I've been so nervous. I can't say sorry enough."

The waiter came and collected their order as they sipped on their wines.

"What did he say after you guys left?" Jade enquired.

"Gee, you guys saw the lighter stuff. He was like a crazy man when we got in the car. But he refused to explain, just went on and on speaking nonsense."

"Really?" Leanne gasped. "You poor dear. The man is a dick, I mean for heavens sake. What's wrong with him? Everybody else thought it was a great idea."

"It's a bloody brilliant idea," Renee, gushed. "I was so looking forward to it. I guess it's all over now though."

"Why?" Jade gasped. "Why should he spoil it for the rest of us?"

"It would hardly be fair, leaving Helle sitting on the sidelines."

"Girls, nobody has to sit and watch. I think that we should proceed as if nothing has happened. Come on, Sonny is a smart guy. I don't know why he's so upset, but the boys'll straighten him out. I think he will get over it once he gets over his fit of whatever that was. I think he'll enjoy it."

"I don't know." Helle sighed. "Last night, god he was so crazy."

"I think he totally got it wrong. He's not that sort of guy. At least I never got that vibe from him," Renee added.

"He's not, he never gets angry like that. It took me completely by surprise," Helle replied.

"Then we should just go ahead. He can't tell you what to do, Helle. He doesn't control your body," Marissa stated firmly as the food turned up.

"Yes, even if he doesn't want to get in on it, you can still enjoy a few dates. The boys will look after you."

"Do you think?" Helle sighed. "He was so angry."

"Honey, I think he was just caught off guard and letting off steam. I don't know why he would be so upset over going on a date with us, we're bloody delightful," Leanne said with a giggle.

"I think it was more me going with the guys. He thinks it's some sort of sexual thing," Helle said sadly.

"Sex? Oh, god no. No disrespect, girls, but I'm not banging your husbands," Jade said with a loud laugh.

"Amen to that," Leanne added. "I'm not looking for sex. If you girls are, then I'm out."

"No, if that's what he thinks, then hopefully the boys'll put him straight. This was never meant to be sexual, just some fun."

"Sweet," Renee said. "I was sort of hoping the boy's would make it a bit competitive and try to out do each other."

"Oh, hell yes," Jade said reaching across and high-fiving Renee. "That would be so choice. Think of the dates we might get."

The mood lifted quickly as they all got into the spirit of it.

Even Helle enjoyed the joking. "It will be just like our early dates. They'll be doing all the hard work, showing off, and still getting nothing."

"Oh, that's just dumb. They will get their rewards. Just not with the sweetie they took on the date. I'm hoping you ladies will get my man all excited, and I'll enjoy the benefits..." Marissa said with a sexy giggle.

"I just want them to make a fuss," Leanne added.

They all headed off home to get dinner. Helle considered her options. She was so pissed off at Sonny. The afternoon had been full of the girls making fun of him, and it was embarrassing. "Why did he do it?" she said to herself, turning into their driveway.

As she walked inside, she was surprised to see Sonny getting himself a beer from the fridge. "What are you doing home so early?"

"I didn't golf, I went for a run. I've been home for ages. I suppose you met up with the girls?"

"Yes," she said curtly. "Why didn't you play golf with the boys?"

"Didn't feel like it. Look, last night, I may have overreacted. I feel a little embarrassed by some of the things I said," Sonny said quietly.

"Babe, it's okay. I think I understand. I could see how shocked you were. I'm sure if you apologise, the guys will forgive you."

"Helle," he said. "I'm embarrassed because of the way I vented, but I stand by the comments. Marissa was way out of line to suggest I would be okay with you dating anybody other than me. I don't know what her game is, or why she suggested it. I'm telling you here and now. I am not okay with it. Not now, not ever."

"Sonny, there's no hidden agenda. It is one hundred percent not about sex. If that's what's worrying you, then stop, because that's not what it's about."

"Then tell me, what the hell is it about, Helle?"

"God, I can't believe how rigid you're being about this. It goes back to the other night, when we were all talking about dating. It was Marissa's idea that we could recreate some of the excitement of dating. Bring some spontaneity and excitement into our lives."

"We can do that without including others, Helle."

"Sonny, it was just a harmless suggestion. So we go out with our friends rather than our husbands. What's the big deal."

"You'd be happy telling your folks you went on a date with another guy?" Sonny could feel the shame rising like an angry horde of ants racing up his oesophagus.

"Yes, once I explained what it was all about, Mum would laugh her tits off," Helle said gayly. "Come on, honey, you're making way too much of this. Surely you would enjoy spending an evening with any of the other girls. They're attractive, smart funny women. If you let yourself go a little, you would enjoy it."

"My parents would have a flying fit. Mum would die of embarrassment." Sonny sighed.

"We don't have to tell them. I know with their religion it might seem weird."

"Don't you get it, Helle? If I'm to embarrassed to tell my parents, then it shouldn't be happening in the first place. What if our other friends see you on a date with Clive, for instance."

"For gods sake. We just tell them. They'd be bloody jealous that they didn't think of it."

"I don't think so. I hate to play the bad guy, but I absolutely forbid it. We are not getting involved, and if they go ahead with it, then I think we should seriously reconsider our group of friends."

"You forbid it!" Helle said flabbergasted. "You can't stop me, Sonny. You might not like it, but you can't bloody well stop me. So pull your fucking head in."

"Helle, I'm warning you," he snarled. "I am still your husband."

In total shock at his draconian stance, Helle shook her head in utter disbelief. "You cannot tell me what to do. We are a partnership. We both work, we are supposed to be equals here."

"We are, at least that's what I always thought," Sonny gasped in outrage. "Being an equal means, if either of us doesn't like it, we don't do it. I absolutely hate the idea of you getting dressed up to go out with another man. I bloody hate it."

"For heavens sake. It's dinner, a movie, or dancing. That's all it is. We all go home to our spouses at the end of the evening. Hopefully, all stimulated and refreshed. Then we all share in it. Think about it, Sonny. You enjoy a wonderful evening, eating good food, enjoying sparkling conversation with one of our closest friends. You find out things about her you didn't know. Share little secrets, enjoy the intimacy of another woman's company in a totally safe warm environment. All fun, with no risks."

"No, you can try to make it sound like that, but the truth is, somebody will say something stupid, and there are risks. What if while you're dancing, Clive comes on to you? What if he wants more than just a friendly date. What if he wants sex?"

"Oh come on, really... Clive. Jesus, Sonny. You're being preposterous."

"It could happen. He has too much to drink, forgets about the rules. Maybe it's not Clive. Maybe it's Nolan."

"Nobody's going to risk their marriage for a feel of my bum, Sonny."

"I don't care. It's not happening, I won't allow it." His firm stance, hands on hips, jaw set firmly, really pissed off Helle.

"I have already told them I'm in. I'm actually looking forward to it," Helle said firmly.

Just then, Amy rushed in through the door screaming. "We won. We won!" She jumped into, Helle's arms and hugged her. "What a day, Mum. I don't think I have ever played as well as I did today."

She turned and reciprocated with her father, and it was then she noticed the tension. Standing down, she spluttered nervously, "What's going on?"

"Nothing, dear. Your father and I had a little disagreement. You go and shower. I want to hear all about the game."

As Amy walked off, Helle snapped, "The kids don't have to know why we're fighting?"

"Don't be bloody daft. They're going to find out when they see you going off on a date with another man."

"Idiot. I wasn't suggesting we keep it a secret. I'm just saying that they don't need to know their fathers an arse."

Sonny stormed off out to his man cave. He was happy to bury himself in his latest project: rebuilding the turbo for his Triumph TR6.

The call for dinner brought him out of his deep mood. Ever since Helle drew her line in the sand he had been trying to figure out what his options were. If she followed through and actually went on the date, what should he do?

Inside, Amy wanted to talk about nothing but netball. At least it raised the spirits. Kirk as well, had a good day, and they had a very pleasant dinner.

That night, Sonny and Helle may have shared a bed, but it was cold, and there was definitely no intimacy.

Sonny wasn't looking forward to work. He wondered how Joe and Phil would approach it. His reservations were quelled as he made himself a cup of tea. Joe walked up and lifted a cup down from the cupboard. "Where were you yesterday? We waited for the best part of an hour. The least you could have done is messaged us to say you weren't coming."

"Sorry, I didn't think you guys would want me there," Sonny stated curtly.

"Oh don't be a fucking dick. Jeez mate, we're all adults. We had a disagreement. No big deal."

"Cool, I'm glad you can see my side."

"Mate, don't get me wrong. There's no grudge, but I don't for the life of me see why you got so bloody angry. If you didn't like Marissa's idea, that's all you had to say. The way you went about, that was fucked up, bro."

"Sorry, but I see it differently. I was totally blind-sided by it. Scared the bejesus out of me."

"You weren't alone, mate. We were all caught off guard, but your reaction was way over the top."

Sonny sipped his tea. "You guys aren't going ahead with it are you? I mean shit, you can't be bothered to take your own wife out. Now you want to take mine? What the fuck?"

"Sonny, we have all dropped the ball. You, me and the others. We all take our women for granted. This actually makes sense. We can treat them a bit special. Okay, I take Helle out, and you take, Marissa out. We all have a good night. We come home, our wives are happy, and we finish the night in the sack. If you treat Marissa nicely, she will be all excited. You do all the hard work, and I get the benefits. The same goes for Helle. Trust me mate, happy wife, happy life."

"Sorry, Joe, but it isn't happening mate. No fucking way. I have nothing against Marissa, but I don't want to take her on a date. It would be bloody uncomfortable. I wouldn't know what to say. Christ man, I hardly know her."

"That's the point. I don't know Helle either. Yeah, we chat at the parties, but I don't really know her. We can all become better friends. We will all know more about each other."

"Nope, not happening. I've already told, Helle. We are not getting involved."

"Oh man, don't be like that. Fucks sake, what harm is there in it? There's no bloody sex involved. Marissa already said, if I so much as hold hands with any of the other wives, I'll be dead by morning. This is purely friends having fun."

Just then, Phil arrived. "Hey, arsehole. Why didn't you fucking call? We stood around for bloody ages waiting."

"I already said sorry to Joe."

The conversation quickly degenerated. Tempers were rising. It was only the presence nearby of other employees that stopped it getting completely out of hand.

A cold truce was formed. Usually the three sat together for morning tea and lunch. Now, they didn't even share the same table. It created a lot of gossip. Sonny was further angered when the boys told their work mates what was going on.

'Didn't they have any shame?' Sonny thought to himself as he heard Joe telling one of their colleagues. Then it wasn't just that others knew, it was the scornful glances from people who knew.

He had to listen to men and women giggling about what a fool he was. That hurt even more. It seemed like he was the only one who had an issue with it.

Since moving to Christchurch, he had worked hard to establish a reputation for being a hard worker, somebody people could rely on, trust. Now they treated him with a certain amount of disdain.

At home, things were cold. Polite, but cold. Even the kids were bemused. True to her word, Helle told them what was happening. They could hardly keep it a secret. All the kids went to the same school. Bloody hell, even they didn't think it was weird. Sonny felt like he was totally isolated, but rather than making him want to give in, it strengthened his resolve. He was more determined than ever that he wasn't getting involved.

It was apparent he couldn't stop Helle, but he certainly didn't have to accept it.

*****

The night of the first date rolled around far too quickly for Sonny. He had completely stopped talking to the guys. His conversations with Helle were perfunctory at best.