All Comments on 'Come for a Visit, Stay for Life Ch. 07'

Can we expect next parts ?

As soon as the moderators decide to approve it It is in the system.

1st off, gave it a 5. Understand it's fiction/ your story which everyone should accept. Would like to throw a slight addendum to your story if I may. Brian is seemingly a Renaissance man, by his understanding of Robert Heinlein. So my take as he listens to Sandy apologize for beating him so badly and then telling him it wasn't personal, I would proceed from: "Don't take this the wrong way, Sandy, but while I could say I forgive you, I don't think I am ready to say it and mean it just yet." ~ 'I believe you are sorry, but please don't tell me it wasn't personal. I understand all of the women here have suffered at the hands of some male; boyfriend, husband, father, etc. But to brutally beat me, someone who has never wronged you, someone who his entire life has protected and cherished a woman, you made it it extremely personal.' Mildred had quietly entered the room behind Brian as she heard his voice becoming edgier and was listening intently to see what he might do to Sandy. 'All of you, Annie, Valarie, you, and even Mildred, have brutalized me, humiliated me, and terrorized me. THAT has made ALL of this personal. I was brought here under false pretenses. Mildred, and the rest of the women, can use semantics to justify their actions, and she has even admitted it to me in her own way, but in the end you know you've lied to me. That has made it personal. Then to humiliate me by hunting me down as a worthless animal and then torture me when I am captured and releasing me to do it all over again....it is PERSONAL. So please, don't sit there and shed a tear as you apologize and tell me you're sorry and expect me to accept it isn't personal because I will not allow it. Obviously you, and Mildred, and who knows how many others, will continue to abuse me and physically and mentally torture me for who knows however long I am alive.' (At that point Mildred let out a gasp as she remembered what Brian had said during the argument with Annie as to who actually captured him and what he might do to himself.) 'But let me say this, every one of you is now as guilty as your abusers. No matter how you justify it in your own minds, you are no better than those who hurt you.' Sandy and Mildred both started to speak but Brian immediately put up his hand to silence them. 'So again, do not embarrass yourselves, and certainly do not challenge my intelligence, by saying it wasn't personal. Every sadistic act going forward you inflict on me is PERSONAL.' Glancing quickly behind him at Mildred he turned back to Sandy and told her, please excuse me while I check on dinner. It should be ready momentarily. As he walked out of the living room Sandy and Mildred could only stare at each other.

Thanks for the feedback and I can see how the story could go the way you suggest but stories sometimes develop a life of their own as they spring from the mind. This story is written from the viewpoint of a female superior society and one in which women are allowed to always have the upper hand much in the way men have throughout history. Your alternative is plausible but in my imagination things happened differently.

How superior is anyone that does not take responsibility for their actions?

What Sandy did was give an explanation.

"Brian, I want you to know that there was nothing personal in that beating I gave you during the hunt. I am sorry I got carried away and it scares me to think about what I might have done to you had not Annie been so impatient to have her turn. I am not a violent person but once I picked up that strap and saw you tied and helpless, something snapped inside my brain and I was someone different. Someone I didn't recognize and who I never want to be again. It was as though you were my husband and it was right after he had given me a beating. I could feel the pain and swelling on my back and ass as if it had just happened. I was all anger, rage and revenge. I wanted him to feel what I was feeling only more so. Only he was not there on the receiving end of the strap, you were. I didn't even realize that Annie had pulled me away."

An explanation that may be understandable from her bad experiences with men but it is not an apology. Especially not since she did not express a single sentence of empathy with the suffering she inflicted on Brian. Furthermore the trigger she mentioned is one that can happen again but no word of what she would do to prevent abuse if that happened again. As an apology this simply is too poor. Still she expects to be forgiven.

That is not taking reponsibility.

I see the same type of explanation without taking responsibility in your own answer that "stories sometimes develop a life of their own as they spring from the mind". That can happen, and often does, but in the end the author makes choices, consciously or unconsciously.

I loved the addendum 2 comments down, and would like to know: wouldn't it in your mind have been a change for the better, a more humane development of your story. Or not?

If not, what is your reason for feeling your own version of Sandy's answer should serve the story better?