Conversion Ch. 01

Conversion

(Chapter 1)

Like most men, before they reach the age of responsibility, I explored the world for what life had to offer. This included of course exploring what my hormones at the time demanded of me. Before I met a woman and married, I hit the occasional strip club, visited a local X-rated movie theater, and collected a few porno magazines. Each new experienced awakening a new level of excitement over the last. Then real life reared up and I met my wife. Actually having sex was far better than fantasizing about it, so the trips to the theaters stopped, the magazines went into the trash, and all my sexual desires went on auto pilot. Then after several years of marriage, things went tits up and I found myself once again on my own.

Well, hormones don't go away, they do kind of go dormant as you age and responsibilities become the focus of life. Then suddenly, when you find yourself no longer married, they tend to work their way back into your life. Left without your regular physical release with your wife and no real restrictions, things begin building up and soon you're open pretty much to anything that allows you some release. Not being a social animal and getting married doesn't exactly allow you to develop those skills, I was somewhat at a loss for how satisfy the inner animal. Since it had filled that need before, I soon reverted back to my old habits. The world had changed over the years. New technologies offered new opportunities. Computers were now pretty advanced and the internet had come along to offer people access to all kinds of information, including of course, pornography.

The internet offered access to much more than you could find at the old stores or movie theaters, and it was easier to get. So began my adventures online. One thing about a failed marriage is that it makes most of us hesitant to put ourselves back into the same situation, thus finding and staying with someone new wasn't a priority for me. I could keep myself pretty well satisfied with a little porn now and again and yes, at times, a lot of masturbation. The issue is that there is this thing called sensory overload. When you encounter something new, it's exciting and fun, but as time passes, the fun lessens and the new wears off. The answer is to look around and find something else new, right? Well that's what addiction is all about and that was what I found myself falling into, an addiction to pornography.

You continue to expand your tastes until one day you find yourself bored, with everything. After a time the boredom begins to work on you and your mind begins urging you to find new outlets. The hormones start raging and sooner than later desperation sets in for some new form of release. This is where I found myself after being alone for more than a year. Yeah, I continued to masturbate which kept things at bay, but actual satisfaction was something I experienced less and less. What was my solution, the internet of course. Absolutely everything was available on the internet, if I searched long enough, I could find the next new thing. I just had to explore options I hadn't previously considered. This was where it all started.

It had been a few days since my last fun session, which hadn't been all that much fun and I was once again trolling through the porn sites looking for something that would inspire me. I had pretty much exhausted vanilla porn and the real kinky stuff was a complete turn off. I wasn't gay so that didn't leave a whole lot, till one day I happened on a hypno video. This one wasn't very long and didn't really cover much, but it was different and it had to do with porn, so I watched. I really didn't see much to it and I don't' believe or didn't believe that hypnosis was all that big a deal, but it did offer something new to explore. So I spent the next few days viewing some videos and checking out what content they had to offer.

Most videos involved some form of submission and included some really kinky stuff I wasn't really into, but one stood out and appeared to offer at least a brief period of fun. I sat down and prepared for a little fun and hit the play button. It started out with some pretty common clips of couples having sex in various ways, with one difference, rather than being bored, I found myself getting very aroused. By the time the video ended, I had worked myself up to a pretty intense orgasm. Wow, I thought, maybe there is something to this. A warning to those of you who want to try this stuff out, it creeps up on you.

Several days passed and I was ready for another release so I picked up where I had left off. I had enjoyed the first video and not wanting to wear it out just yet, I sought out something new. I soon found another video, similar to the first but with enough differences to make it new. Again, the same response, I soon found myself incredibly aroused. This time I didn't just immediately jerk of, but explored some other videos instead, choosing to prolong the experience. I soon found another, this one like the other two, played music and had flashing images of random sex acts, accept this one had a few of shemales. I had looked at shemale porn during my explorations but never found it all that exciting. Mixed with the rest though, the images were having another affect on me, they was turning me on.

Intrigued by this, I kept watching and as I had committed to making this session a long one and soon found myself seeking out more videos with shemales. That's when it happened, I ran across a video that showed what I was seeking with one exception. Once I got into the video and was really getting turned on, the images didn't change but messages started flashing in the background. Messages about the color pink, about sexy clothes, panties, and asking if they turned me on. What surprised me was that I was turned on even more surprising was how intense that feelings were. I couldn't restrain myself and was soon pounding my cock to an incredibly satisfying climax.

My intense reaction to what I watched sort of frightened me and I went a couple of weeks before my body began to protest my lack of attention to its physical needs. I made up my mind that I wasn't going to go back to that particular video but before long that was exactly where I found myself, watching it again. My bodies reaction was even more intense this time and I soon found myself having another incredible orgasm. This time, I didn't just log out immediately, I continued to watch and found my desire rising again for a second time. Before I knew it, a couple of hours had passed and I had jerked off twice more.

Well, needless to say I had worked my poor penis pretty hard and was kind of sore. This resulted in a long gap between fun sessions. Something else occurred during this down time. I was surfing the net not looking for anything in particular. Anyone who spends any time on the net knows that almost every website has ads. Insurance ads, vacation ads, car ads, even clothes show up on websites. I had been watching some short videos on history topics when an ad popped up that caught my eye. Now everyone knows that if you click on an ad, it opens a new page on your computer displaying the website for whomever sponsored the ad. For no apparent reason, I felt drawn to this ad and clicked on it. It was an ad for women's underwear. As soon as the page opened, I found myself glancing through page after page of women's underwear, panties, bras, and stockings, lingerie of every type, color, and size. Interesting enough, I found myself getting aroused.

Two things happened, first, one thing my ex had been good at was her choice of underwear. She had numerous sets of sexy things she'd wear, just not always for my benefit. Still they did turn me on when I'd see her in them, so getting aroused while looking at sexy underwear wasn't much of a surprise. The second thing however was surprising and caused me to turn off my computer. I found myself considering what it would feel like to wear some of those sexy items. Life moves on, I didn't stop surfing the net but I did make a point of not looking at the ads. The disturbing feelings I had bothered me and aided me in controlling my urges for a couple more weeks, m needs finally got to me and it happened again.

I had decided to clean out some stuff in the house. The house was full of crap I hadn't used in forever and some stuff I didn't even know was there anymore. So I embarked on a cleaning out spree. I went through the attic, the garage, and the closets, accumulating quite a large pile of stuff for the trash. During one of my inspection of one of the closets, I found a bag of clothes I hadn't seen. As it turned out it was some of my ex's stuff. The bag was too big to toss on its own, so I dumped it out on the bed to parcel the load into smaller bags. What happen next changed my life. As I perused the pile and started stuffing old jeans and shirts into a small bag, I uncovered several pairs of my ex's underwear. Some were just plain cotton panties, but there were a few of her more special items and I found myself being captivated by the sight of them.

When I picked up a pair black lace panties, I found myself just staring at them. I could remember my ex wearing them and how they looked on her. I could also remember how the sight of them excited me. The daze past and I dropped them into another pile for a new bag to trash. I return to sorting out old T shirts and shorts then happened on another pair of panties. These were pink and before I knew what was happening, I found myself getting a huge erection. My hand drifted to my stiffening member as I reached out and picked up the simple pink cotton panties. I didn't remember them but somehow they were having a wild effect on me. I found myself stroking my cock as I held the panties. Something deep within me, told me I need to masturbate with them and began rubbing my hard cock with the panties.

No sooner had I wrapped the panties around my cock, than my cock exploded in an intense orgasm. I almost dropped to my knees the feeling was so intense. I stood trembling, my eyes closed, as the waves of pleasure subsided. As things began to cool off, I opened my eyes a saw that not only had I shot my load onto the panties, I had evidently exploded as there was traces of cum all over the pile of clothes on the bed. It suddenly occurred to me that I couldn't throw these things away with cum all over them, what would someone think if they found them. Yeah, I wasn't thinking all that clearly at the time, but the decision to wash them before putting them in the trash further changed my life.

The feelings of guilt which seemed come often after indulging yourself, kicked in and I gathered the remaining clothes, stuffed them in a new bag and stashed them back in the closet. I tried putting the incident behind me, but no matter what, my mind seemed to drift back to those pink panties. After a day or two, I resigned myself to doing something about the clothes. I had already decide to wash them before throwing them away so dragged the bag out of the closet and headed to the laundry room. I put the clothes in the wash and went about my daily chores. When the washer dinged, I quickly transferred the whole batch to the dryer and continued with my cleaning. The clothes dropped off the radar after that and didn't popped back up until a few days later when I had some of my own laundry to do, that's when I remembered the dryer was full. I collected the clothes from the dryer and dumped them on the bed while I started the other laundry.

I now had to deal with my wife's old clothes. I grabbed a trash bag intending to toss them now that all evidence of my sexual activities was gone and as I started putting items in the bag, I came upon those pink panties again. I picked them up and just stared at them. The image of them wrapped around my cock came into my mind. I couldn't seem to think of anything other than how they had felt on my cock. I suddenly found myself wondering what they would feel like if I were to put them on, before I knew it, I was stripping out of my clothes and sliding them up my legs. They were a bit snug and hugged my body pretty tight, but no sooner than had them on I glanced up to see myself in the dresser mirror, standing there with nothing but a pair of women's panties on. My cock immediately became erect and I don't mean it got stiff, I mean it went rigid. I don't think I have ever experienced and instant hard on like the one I now sported.

I stood mesmerized by my reflection, the head of my cock protruding out of the waist band. The sight of my cock turned me on even further and it wasn't long before I was pounding away thinking of nothing but sight of my own reflection wearing those pink panties. My orgasm was more intense than before. The image in my mind seemed to have intensified the pleasure somehow. This time I had laid down on the bed so didn't have to worry about falling down, but the trembling in my legs was still there. As a matter of fact the trembling was more intense, spreading all over from the waves of pleasure which had coursed through my like an electric current.

Once I had regained my composure, I noticed I had once again soaked the pink panties with cum. I quickly took them off and slipped them in with my regular clothes to wash again. I dressed and deposited the remaining clothes back in the closet, then promptly forgot about everything for a few days, that is until I finally got around to finishing up my regular clothes. I tend to ball everything up and toss everything at once so didn't actually see the panties again until the next day when I started pulling stuff out of the dryer, that's' when they again influenced my life. I found myself getting aroused but this time life's little issues, work, restricted my available time, so I folded them up with the rest of my clothes and deposited them in my bedroom.

When I returned home that evening, the panties had once again been forgotten that is until I sat down at my computer. At some point during the day, I started thinking it was time to work on my growing need for sexual release, so I sat down and went on the net to see what I could see. I eventually ended up back at the video. My dick was rock hard and I needed some relief, so I cranked up the video. I hadn't gotten very far into it when I suddenly remembered the panties. I'm not sure how I knew, but somehow I understood the experience would be enhanced if I included the panties. I quickly found them and had them on then returned to the video. As soon as I hit play I lost track of time, the next thing I knew I was sitting in my chair panting with my efforts and once again, the pink panties were soaked in my cum.