Destinatum Amare Tecum

"Please don't go," she whispered, tears swimming in her eyes. "Be with me..."

I loved Julia, I loved Julia, I loved...I loved...

'Is it really so wrong?'

I...

...shook my head, forcing the feelings away as I was pulled out of her home and all but thrown into the backseat.

Julia got in the front and locked the doors. "Buckle up babe, we're getting as far from this city and her as we can."

"W-We are?" I croaked, the weakness in my voice unbearable. "B-But-"

A loud growl followed by something smashing made us both jump.

"Is that...?"

A low, keening howl filled the air, filled...filled me with...I felt sad.

"Remus stop!"

I blinked and took my hand away from the handle, suddenly aware that I'd been trying to open it.

Panicking I looked at Julia, an apology ready on my lips.

"I know baby, I know," she cut across before I could so much as speak. Her eyes in the mirror met my own. "But whatever you're feeling right now, it's fake and wrong and more importantly it's been forced upon you."

She started the car and pulled out onto the road, Lucy's home quickly becoming a distant spec as we drove away.

"Pre-destined bond, what a load of horseshit!" she spat, tears trickling down her face as her voice trembled. "We've been together for eight years, eight fucking years bubby! Please, whatever you feel, whatever you think you feel for that Monster, ignore it. It's false, it's wrong. You love me, I know you can't say it because of this magical bullshit, but I know you do."

I tried to nod but was stopped as my head began to pound with pain.

"I don't feel so good Julia," I said, my vision swimming as I began to sweat. "I think that fever's coming back."

She glanced at the mirror and frowned at me. "Well you're getting away from her and it probably doesn't like that. Just bear with it for now bubby. I'll get you some medication sorted once we get out of here."

I wiped my sweaty head and nodded, looking at her via the mirror and smiling.

"Thanks for all of that back there babe," I said, enjoying the warm smile I got back. "I couldn't really talk. I felt...it was just really hard. And I kind of thought you'd just..."

"Leave you to the wolf?" she asked, grinning lightly. "Not a chance mister. You and I, we're stuck together forever. And once this thing's done, we're gonna start working on that family."

I smiled happily. "I lo...I lo..."

"I know bubby," she said soothingly, reaching behind to gently rub my hand. "I love you too."

I tried to say something back only to be overwhelmed by something...something really...really pleasant.

A scent, a smell. One that smelt like chocolate and grass and...and...sex?

"Babe?"

Julia's worried face swam into focus as I shook the scent away.

"I can smell her," I said quietly, wincing at the hurt in her eyes. "I'm sorry hun. I'm trying to ignore it, I really am."

"I know baby, I know," she reassured, her lips a thin line. "I don't blame you one bit, hell I don't even blame the wolf. It's that Pre-Mating bulllshit that doing this to the both of you."

She didn't blame Lucy?

Catching my surprised look she explained. "I'm a doctor love, and as one I have to look at situations with a rational mind. So do I like the fact that she's probably going to try and hunt you down? No. But do I blame her for wanting to do so? Also no. It's Monster magic and even now nobody really understands how it all works."

I smiled at her tenderly. Her warmth and kindness were so profound even then.

'This is why I fell so deeply in love with her.'

As the thought crossed my mind I felt a painful pounding in my head. It was like a migraine and a drum beat packed into one, forcing me to hiss in pain as I leaned back against the seat.

"I know baby, I know it hurts," she said softly. "Just bear with it for now. Try to sleep if you can, we've got a few hours yet."

I nodded slowly and closed my eyes, wincing as the last thing that came to me was the memory of Lucy's tear filled eyes and distressed howl.

Lucy POV

The magic that was pinning me to the wall faded and I fell to the floor with a crash, snarling as I immediately raced towards the door.

"Lucy," Lillia uttered, my name barely catching my attention as my body all but screamed at me to chase after them.

"What?!" I snarled, my voice less a voice and more a growl. "Going to pin me to the floor this time?"

She shook her head. "I'm sorry Lucy but if I hadn't held you then you'd likely be going to jail for murder."

I blinked...but silently agreed. If I hadn't been pinned to the wall then I'd likely have torn J...J...Remus's woman apart with my bare hands.

Reason had left me, logic had left me. Raw emotion was all that remained, emotion and instinct. And both were telling me one thing and one thing only.

To find Remus and Mate with him.

'And if that woman gets in my way...'

Enraged I grabbed the nearest possible thing and threw it at the wall, fury and sadness bubbling inside me like a cocktail of intense emotion.

I couldn't stop the howl that left my lips. A low howl, a desperate howl. Desperate for him, all for him.

I needed...I had to...I needed...

My ears perked up as I heard the car leaving the driveway and raced towards the door, ripping it nearly off its hinges as I watched in despair, his car already long down the road as it sped away from me.

"No..." I whimpered, anger, distress, fear. All of it raging within me as I spun around and glared at Lillia. "Tell me how to get him back!"

Lillia raised an eyebrow at my demand. "You want me to help you steal that poor woman's boyfriend? I thought Wolves valued loyalty?"

"She's not his anything!" I snapped, growling audibly. "He's mine! You said so yourself! I'm not stealing anyone, I'm taking him back before she can make this situation any worse."

"I said that the both of you were destined to become Mates," Lillia explained, smirking at me. "I never said that I'd speed up the process however. So if you want my help then you're going to have to give me something in return."

I frowned, the memory of my multicoloured tail popping up in my mind.

"Such as?"

"Observation!" Lillia chirped, grinning widely as she zipped over to me. "You sign a contract that will allow me to view the process through your memories, and I'll help you get your man. Sound like a deal?"

"What's the catch?" I asked, fighting against the urge to immediately agree.

"No catch," she said, shaking her head. "This is a once...or I suppose twice in a lifetime opportunity. And I want front row seats to all of it."

I blinked in surprise at her eagerness, but swallowed down any questions as the urge to claim him began to rob me of higher thought.

"Okay fine, I consent to the deal."

Lillia smirked and snapped her fingers, a bright blue flash following suit as the deal was sealed. That was how they did contracts, not with paper and pen but words and consent.

"And so it is done," she said happily, her expression suddenly rather devious as she clicked her fingers once again and a plain looking sweatband appeared out of thin air.

"What is that?" I asked, sniffing curiously and nearly falling to the floor as something strong answered for me.

"This," Lillia began, grinning at my reaction. "Has been filled to the brim with Mr Jackson's essence. And once you put it on, it'll...guide you to his general location."

"His essence?" I croaked, struggling to stay upright with my shaky legs. "You mean his...how did you even...?"

"Trade secret," she replied, smirking. "All you need be concerned with is how it works. And it's quite simple really. Just put it on and you'll instinctively gain a crystal clear awareness of where he is. Follow it and you'll eventually be reunited with your potential Mate!"

She tossed it at me and I caught it deftly, putting it on and...and...

"Oh..."

I could feel him. And not just his general location but him in general. I could feel what he was feeling, and what he was feeling was...sadness, anger.

Love.

But not for me, for her!

I snarled and a sudden echo of pain reverberated from the connection, my throat letting lose a low whine as I realized it was likely because of me.

"Down girl," Lillia teased, her grin wide and somewhat crazed. "That sweatbands connection amplifies and will gradually expedite the one being born between you and it'll do so with both sides of it so he'll notice it eventually."

My eyes widened at her words.

'It'll connect us...faster?'

"So try to calm down," she continued, smirking. "Get too angry and you'll hurt him. Get too randy and he'll...well, you'll see!"

And before I could do or say anything, she gave a cheery wave and popped away, leaving me standing alone in my home.

"It goes both ways," I murmured, annoyed at the catch she'd promised didn't exist. "Just like a Fairy to bullshit a contract."

Still it could actually be something of a boon. A connection that went both ways meant that if I were to channel emotion through it, he would feel it. And in turn, I would feel his reaction to it.

But as I planned on just how to do so, I felt a wave of exhaustion through the connection. Not just exhaustion however, but...complete exhaustion. As if he was falling, or had indeed fallen asleep.

'Why do I feel so tired...?'

It was the last thought I had before my knees buckled and I fell to the floor fast asleep.

I didn't notice the sweatband glowing.

Remus POV

I felt warm, really warm.

It was like a blanket had been draped over me. Warming me, protecting me. Whatever it was, it was more than enough to make me smile and shuffle against it.

...and then it giggled.

I opened my eyes and squinted at the daylight coming from the sun rising.

'Must have slept through the night.'

I glanced blearily at Julia...who was still driving the car and therefore couldn't be the cause of the laughter.

'Then what was that?' I thought wearily, sighing as I glanced out of the far window-

"Somebody likes my tail."

-and yelled in fright as Lucy's smiling visage met me instead.

The car swerved as Julia yelped in panic, her eyes anxious as she looked at the mirror.

"Babe, are you okay?!" she asked, worry clear in her tone. "What's wrong? Do you still feel sick?"

"What, no!" I cried, pointing at the bemused looking Wolf Girl. "Can't you see her?! She's right there!"

Julia frowned and shook her head. "Bubby nobody's there. Are you sure you're okay?"

Nobody was there?

I looked at Lucy who merely grinned and pointed at a lightly glowing sweatband on her wrist.

"Courtesy of Lillia," she said softly, her smile widening. "Which is why I'm guessing I'm also able to be here."

She pulled her tail back from where it'd been wrapped around me and pouted. "I take it you don't want my tail anymore?"

Frankly bewildered, I ignored the Wolf and looked at Julia. "Can you really not see her?"

Julia frowned but shook her head. "I can only see you bubby." Her frown became thunderous after a few moments. "It must be that stupid bond thing!"

Her frown softened into a pleading smile. "Please just try to ignore her babe. All of this is being forced on you. Whatever she says, whatever she does. It's not real, it's artificial emotion. What we have is real, our love is real. Please try to focus on that."

I forced myself to smile at her surprisingly...hurtful words? The words felt painful to hear, as if...as if I didn't want to believe them?

"Trust a Human to call Mating artificial," Lucy said, snarling at Julia before looking at me warmly. "I know you don't want to believe me Remus. But what you're feeling, what you're fighting. It's real, it not fake and it's not forced."

"Not forced?" I scoffed, shuffling as far away from her as I could in the backseat. "Yesterday I woke up and felt nothing but love and joy being around Julia. This...this thing happening to me is trying to take that away and you tell me it isn't forced?"

"It isn't though," she refuted. "Look you're Human. You're not raised with the same, if any understanding of what a Mated Bond is, and what it does for the couple."

"Your point being?"

"My point bubby," she continued, grinning at my wince. "Is that a Mated Bond, Pre destined or no, cannot steal or erase a love that wasn't true. If you truly loved Julia then this bond wouldn't have even started to form."

I felt my skin grow cold at her explanation, a trickle of sweat dripping down my back.

"You're lying," I whispered, shaking my head. "I lo...I lov..."

"See," she said, smiling sadly. "It's not erasing it because of me. It's erasing it because of you. It knows that your love for your darling little Julia isn't true. Oh you may think you love her and to a degree that'd be correct. But when compared to the complete and utter love one can experience when Mated to a Monster, it's like a candlelight's flicker against a forest fire."

She wasn't lying. I didn't know how I knew, but I knew she wasn't lying.

"I don't care," I whispered, shivering as she sighed. "I've known Julia for years, we've been together for eight. We're even...even planning on starting a family. I won't give that up for anyone, I don't care how much better you think you'd be for me."

Lucy sighed again and closed her eyes, her smile still sad as she opened them once more and began to crawl closer, her large tail swishing behind her.

"She said as much before," she began, her voice low, husky. "Which makes it all the more important that I make you see sense before you make a huge mistake."

"See sense?" I echoed, my back hitting the car door as she came closer. "Don't come any closer, stay away from me!"

"Remus I'm going to stop at the services up there," Julia cut in, her eyes wide with fear as she took in my terrified appearance. "I don't know what she's doing but please try to ignore her!"

"You know I really do pity her," Lucy said quietly, her eyes telling a different tale as they narrowed dangerously at Julia, only turning back to me after a moment had passed. "She's fighting so hard to keep you as hers. But it won't stop me from coming for you. It won't stop me from making you understand."

"Understand what?" I asked, gasping as her hands cupped my face.

"That even an echo of me can outdo anything she's ever done for you."

I grasped her hands and tried to wrench them away from my face, but I couldn't. With each motion I tried to make, my hands sort of...fell through her wrists as if they were liquid.

"It won't let you touch me if it's with ill intent," Lucy explained softly, her silver eyes glowing faintly as her face neared my own. "You have to want me to touch me."

"How do you know all this?" I croaked, leaning as far away from her as I could. "You didn't know what a Pre Bond thing was either."

"Because I'm listening to it," she whispered, smiling warmly at me. "I'm not fighting against it, I won't, I refuse. And as such it's letting me know what I need to know."

She leaned in. "In order to get what I want, what you want...what you need."

I tried to push her away, to get away, to stop her. But I couldn't, it wouldn't let me. She wouldn't let me.

Her hand turned my face with a gentle but firm grasp, her breath tickling my lips...before they met and she groaned against me.

'It...I...what is...happening...'

Fireworks, explosions, lights dancing before my eyes as she growled and began to kiss me with abandon. I kept my lips still, refusing to return it, refusing to...to...to...

She broke the kiss, her growling low, playful. "Come on puppy, kiss me. I know you can feel it. I know you can feel how good it is."

"Never," I gasped, breathing heavily as I glanced towards my girlfriend. "I'll never betray Julia."

"Betray?" Lucy echoed, her frown befuddled. "Staying with her and giving her false hope is betrayal. You know as well as I do that what you just felt, what we felt far outstripped anything you've ever had before. Can you really look me in the eye and tell me that you'll be able to keep resisting it?"

She leaned back in, smiling as I trembled in...desire?

"Don't fight me puppy" she crooned. "Give in to it, give in to me."

The car door opened behind me and I almost fell out of the seat, my seatbelt being the only thing that was keeping me from landing on the pavement.

"I'm sorry bubby," Julia cried, tears glittering in her eyes as she helped me back up and undid my belt. "I got here as fast as I could. I'm sorry I wasn't faster."

I blinked wildly, the place Lucy had just been was now empty.

She was gone.

"Remus?"

Julia's soft whimper snapped me out of my trance as I got out of the car and immediately wrapped her in my embrace.

"Oh baby you're shaking," she gasped, placing her hands under my shirt and rubbing my back soothingly. "And you're burning up again. God I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. Are you okay? What did she do to you?"

I shivered in her hold, though from fear or desire I didn't know. I didn't want to know.

"She tried to...well, tempt me I guess," I said shakily, swallowing as her eyes narrowed. "I resisted, I swear I did. She kissed me but I didn't return it, I swear I didn't."

"I believe you bubby," she soothed, smiling as best she could. "It's okay. Look we'll check in at the hotel here and get some R and R. I'm really tired."

"Oh Christ, you've been driving all night," I said, pulling her tighter against me. She sighed in contentment as I did so. "Let's get checked in then, okay."

No more was said as she locked the car and we quickly entered the hotel, checking into a room with a double bed. Julia already had her top off by the time I'd closed the door and her jeans quickly followed suit as she climbed into the bed.

"Come on bubby," she said tiredly, patting the side of the bed next to her. "I know you've slept but you still don't look well. A few more hours will do you some good."

I doubted anything conventional like sleep would make this headache go away. But it wasn't like I had other options, so I undressed and climbed in next to her. Our legs tangled comfortably against one another as she snuggled in close, breathing me in and closing her eyes in pleasure.

"I love you bubby," she said softly, kissing my chest.

I tried to say it, but even the beginnings of the phrase refused to leave my lips now. Julia sighed at my visible discomfort and kissed my chest again.

"It's okay baby," she reassured, burying her face against me. "I know you love me, you don't need to try and say it."

She sighed again and carried on. "And once this bond thing is broken, we'll be able to leave this terrible time behind us as nothing more than a bad memory. And then...and then we can finally work on starting that family."

Smiling widely as she finished talking, she relaxed and eventually fell asleep. But I couldn't sleep, I could still smell Lucy's unique scent and it was making me feel things that made my stomach twist in knots.

She had come to me somehow, whether through that magic sweatband or this bond or some other way.

'What if falling asleep makes me go to her?'

I shivered in fear at the thought. But the longer I laid there with Julia, her breathing slow and warm against my skin.

The longer I laid there...the longer I...the longer...

I...

Lucy POV

The wind was rustling against my jacket as I sped quickly down the motorway, the roar of my motorbike nigh deafening as I continued listening to the Bond.