Doctor Who: Longing for love

Doctor Who: Longing for love

The Tardis hummed quietly as the Doctor sat on the stairs close to the console; she sighed as she watched the doors, waiting for the others to come back, hoping Graham and Ryan would change their minds.

She stood up, approaching the console, preparing to leave as she suspected none of them would return. Just as she was about to take off, the Tardis door opened; she whipped round to see Yaz entering, greeting her with a smile.

"Yaz! I was starting to think you'd gone too." Said the Doctor, relieved that Yaz had returned.

"What? I'm not going anywhere without you! You really think I'd give up on all this?" Said Yaz cheerfully, joining the Doctor at the console.

The Doctor smiled happily. "I'm glad you're still here! At least I've got one of you." Yaz could see her smile quickly fading, so she nudged her in the arm.

Yaz grinned. "Well, it's just the two of us now... Who knows what might happen." She said, bumping into the Doctor gently.

"Yeah, it's not too bad. Bit quieter, I guess." The Doctor nodded, adjusting some of the controls on the console and inputting a new destination.

"Maybe. But we could always make some noise of our own?" She replied, grinning at her as she bit her lip gently. The Doctor continued messing with the controls, making a few alterations she'd forgotten to make far too long ago.

The Doctor gasped suddenly. "Oh, yeah, we could start a band! I think I've still got me guitar somewhere! Oh, but we'd need the others; who's gonna play the drums and everything?" She said, her smile fading again.

Yaz rolled her eyes, finding the Doctor's innocent naivety somewhat cute "I mean yeah, we could... We wouldn't necessarily need anyone else. It could just be the two of us, alone, in your bedroom, perhaps?" She said, following the Doctor around the console, keeping close to her in the hopes she might catch her gaze.

The Doctor nodded. "Yeah, I guess we could pull it off, just you and me! But I wouldn't go near my room, bit of a mess."

Yaz laughed. "I'm sure it is! You alright?" She asked, sad to see the Doctor so disheartened.

The Doctor glanced at her briefly. "Who, me?" Looking confused by the question.

"Are you sure you're alright? You don't seem as lively as usual." Asked Yaz.

The Doctor smiled. "Course I am! Why wouldn't I be?"

Yaz shrugged. "You don't seem as lively. Anything I can do to help, take your mind off whatever's bothering you?" Staying reasonably close, toying with the Doctor's coat.

The Doctor shook her head quickly. "Nah, I'm fine. Not bothered about anything." Smiling again briefly.

Yaz sighed, slightly annoyed about her being so stubborn. "Okay, so where are we off to now then?" She said casually.

"Uh, not sure yet. Maybe a resort or something? Nice beaches and warm weather, better than England. Drendonia's nice this time of year; what about that?"

Yaz smiled. "Yeah, could do! It'd just be us; we can relax; spend some time together. See where things go." Watching the Doctor's expressions. Yaz bit her lips again, hating to see the Doctor so distant. She drew closer still, brushing up against her.

"Doctor?" Yaz called.

"Yeah?" The Doctor responded, facing Yaz only to be greeted with a sudden kiss. With no time to react, their lips met. The Doctor inhaled sharply, surprised by Yaz's seemingly random advance. As her hearts jumped suddenly, she got a strange fluttering feeling rising from her stomach, unable to fight the overwhelming urge to kiss back.

Sharing a few gentle pecks for a moment, the Doctor soon withdrew, taking a couple of steps back as she took a deep breath, starting to blush.

Yaz watched her back away, balling her fists and closing her eyes as she expected the worst "Shit."

"I'm sorry, I couldn't help it! I'm so sorry!" She panicked, lowering her hands and opening her eyes again, seeing the Doctor go totally red-faced, approaching her slowly.

"No, no. It's fine... Don't be sorry. Um, uh... Just, kinda caught me off guard, that's all." The Doctor gulped, still feeling that fluttering in her stomach.

"Sorry, I just. Uh, shit. I've been meaning to say something for a while now... Um, I just, I really like being around you. Spending time with, just being anywhere near you, really. Like, I really love being around you; you're just so warm and friendly... And you drive me crazy, just lookin at you, hearing your voice, you're bloody beautiful." Said Yaz, trying to keep herself calm, watching the Doctor's expressions as she approached.

"I could never find the right moment to say anything, with everything going on, not being alone for very long. But after this, you just... I couldn't bear to see you so down. I know you're gonna miss em, so I wanted to cheer you up a bit somehow." She continued.

The Doctor cleared her throat, nodding as she gathered herself to form a response, "Uh, blimey. Thanks! That's-that's really sweet. Yeah, uh, I wasn't expecting that. It definitely did something; wow. That felt pretty good, actually." The Doctor sighed nervously, feeling her face go all warm, along with a few other sensations that started fluttering in other areas down below.

Yaz contained her excitement in hearing the Doctor say that, also starting to blush as she couldn't wipe the smile from her face. She took a deep breath, getting closer still. "So you're okay with what I did? Jesus, okay um." she gulped.

The Doctor nodded. "Yeah, yeah. Absolutely. That was uh, better than some I've had before, most actually." She said, struggling to keep eye contact as she blushed harder.

Yaz was a little taken aback, her eyes widening with delight. "Really? Okay. Well, uh, wanna try it again, maybe?"

The fluttering in the Doctor's stomach and other organs intensified. She nodded slightly. "Yeah, I'm good with that." The two of them got close again, looking at each other longingly before they both laughed for a moment, slowly easing in for another kiss.

Their lips met tenderly, sharing a few pecks before easing into heavier kisses. Lips smacking and tongues starting to join the action, Yaz tried to ease her way in, going carefully to avoid disrupting the moment, but still wanting more, hoping the Doctor wouldn't get put off by her going too far, despite nearly full-on French kissing her.

She soon felt the Doctor's tongue timidly probing back, making her inhale slightly as she let out a soft moan, gripping the front of the Doctor's coat a little tighter, scrunching it in her hands.

"Sorry. It's been a while... Pretty rusty." Said the Doctor, pulling away slightly so she could speak.

Yaz stopped for a moment, staying close, nose to nose, as she smiled, sighing blissfully, "It's okay, you're doing great!" trembling with excitement slightly.

They look at each other for a moment, easing back into their Frenching. The Doctor didn't know what to do with her hands, awkwardly placing them either on Yaz's shoulder or on herself.

Yaz took one of her hands gently, guiding it to her back, before guiding her other hand down to her arse, urging the Doctor to grope her.

Yaz moaned a little heavier as the Doctor squeezed her butt firmly, holding her tighter as she started to get back into the rhythm of lovemaking after so many years alone. Yaz slowly back her towards the console, taking a handful of one of the Doctor's breasts, also grabbing her arse for a moment, getting a good feel of her body. As they kissed, Yaz couldn't help but delight in the Doctor's warm and welcoming presence, making her crave more of her touch.

Sliding the Doctor's coat off, Yaz yearned for more, pushing her colourful suspenders off her shoulders as the Doctor's coat dropped onto the console, soon sliding down and onto the floor. The Doctor pulled Yaz's jacket off, her breathing getting heavier as Yaz continued groping her breasts.

Yaz shivered with excitement, tracing one of her hands down the Doctor's body. The Doctor gulped as Yaz snuck her hand through the top of her trousers, slipping past her underwear. The Doctor shook her head slightly, looking sad again as she stopped Yaz from going any further, pulling her hand out and slipping to the side.

"I'm sorry, but I can't! We can't do this... I'm sorry!" Said the Doctor reluctantly, turning away from her.

Yaz gasped, opening her eyes as the Doctor stepped away again. "What's wrong? Was I going too far? I was getting carried away; I'm sorry." She said worriedly, reaching out for the Doctor to comfort her.

"No, it's not that. I really want to, believe me, I really do! But I just can't. Forming attachments like this, it's difficult." Said the Doctor, starting to tear up but still holding herself together.

"We can take it slow; I probably come across a little intense..." Said Yaz, still worrying that she'd ruined her chance.

The Doctor cut her off. "It's more complicated than that, Yaz! Sorry, didn't mean to snap... What I mean is, I'm not like you. I don't age; I regenerate. But you, you're human, and that's totally fine, but you get old, you die." She said somberly, looking down at the floor, tears building up in her eyes as she remembered all those who had been and gone, all those she'd lost.

"I-I, I didn't; I'm sorry." Stuttered Yaz, almost tearing up as she saw the Doctor trying to keep it together.

"Don't be sorry, Yaz. It's not your fault. I really mean this when I say it, I really do want to Yaz, there's something between us, I've felt it. I mean, I can feel it now! Me mouth feels all tingly or something, can't quite put me finger on it... But it's just not fair on either of us. The last thing I want is to see you wither away like that." Said the Doctor somberly, approaching her again and taking her hand, rubbing it gently.

Yaz smiled brightly, the fluttering in her stomach intensifying as a huge weight felt like it had lifted from her chest; hearing the Doctor say she also felt something for her.

"I don't mind growing old with you. Spending my life with the most amazing and wondrous person I've ever met, I can't think of anything better! The things we'd see and do, a whole universe to explore. I'd give anything for a life like that!" Said Yaz trying to stay positive, gazing into the Doctor's pale green eyes.

"I know, and that's so so sweet of you! But I won't watch you grow old. I've lost too many people. I don't want to lose you too, not like that. I mean, we can still travel together; I love having you around! But you and I, or just me and anyone in general really, I couldn't do it, being that close knowing it'd have to end that way." Said the Doctor, placing a hand on Yaz's face, stroking her cheek gently.

Yaz nodded, not saying much as she lowered her gaze, a stray tear rolling down her cheek. The Doctor almost burst into tears as she saw how sad Yaz was, throwing her arms around her and hugging her tightly. As she held Yaz, comforting her as best she could, her mind kept jumping back, hearing voices surface from her most profound memories.

"How many have died in your name?" Said the echoing voice of Davros.

"Their lives are so fleeting. So many goodbyes. How lonely you must be, Doctor." Said the voice of Mr Finch.

The Doctor tightened her grip, squeezing Yaz firmly as the voices swirled round in her mind. Stirring a series of dark feelings within her as she sighed.

Yaz hugged the Doctor back, pulling back gently and looking her in the eyes again. "I understand, it's alright. I didn't mean to make things difficult. I just want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy, more than anyone."

The Doctor chuckled with a beaming smile. "Let me make it up to you. I know somewhere we can go that'll make us both happier!" She said, squeezing Yaz tightly again before heading back to the console and changing their destination again.

Yaz laughed, nodding as the Doctor moved to the console. She sighed, wiping her eyes as she watched the Doctor's hands dancing away at the controls. Her thoughts all consumed by their passionate moment together, the feel of her body, the smell of her hair, the faint lingering sensation of the Doctor groping her arse.

The Doctor input a new planet into the flight controls, moments away from hitting the handbrake as she too couldn't take her mind off of their moment, her mouth still feeling their kisses, her breasts still warm from her touch.

Suddenly Yaz spoke up, "Hang on a minute... Earlier, when you told me about what happened between you and the Master, when you were inside that Matrix thing. You said something about a woman from your world, Tecteun? She gained that ability you have, regeneration. Which made her immortal, right?"

"Yeah?" Said the Doctor, with her hand hovering above the handbrake.

"Can't we change it to work on a human? I mean, she was an alien, but she managed to pull it off, right? Why not try the same on me?" said Yaz, joining the Doctor at the console.

The Doctor paused for a few moments, stunned by the idea; her thinking face soon formed as she quickly looked something up on the console display. "Maybe, no, not that, yeah, no, yeah... I don't know, uh, Ahhh. Yes!" She said, her hands on her head, tapping her skull every now and then as she responded to her own thoughts. Yaz watched her intently during her energetic internal monologue.

The Doctor gasped suddenly, smiling at her "Yazmin Khan, you're a bloody genius!" She beamed, grabbing her face and kissing her on the lips.

Yaz almost jumped for joy, throwing her arms around the Doctor and holding her tight. "Do you think it might work?"

"If I can find the right equipment for a DNA splice and a couple of other bits, make a few changes for a human body... We might stand a chance!" Said the Doctor cheerfully, almost glowing with joy, kissing Yaz again.

The two shared another passionate moment, groping each other longingly. "Brilliant! So... Does this mean, we can, you know... Keep going?" Said Yaz, biting her lips seductively as she gazed at the Doctor with a beaming grin.

The Doctor smiled, stroking Yaz's cheek gently. "You know what, Yaz. Why not? I've been alone for too long. Far too long." She said. Kissing Yaz tenderly, cupping her bum firmly.

Yaz gave a soft moan as the Doctor touched her. "There's so much I want to do. You feel so good." She sighed, feeling the Doctor's breasts.

"Such as?" Said the Doctor curiously, squeezing Yaz's butt gently.

Yaz slipped a hand down the Doctor's body, sighing raggedly as she looked her in the eyes. "How long you got?" she said, biting her lips as she slid her hand into the Doctor's underwear.

The Doctor took a deep breath as she felt Yaz's hand gently rubbing around her labia; she gulped, waiting for her to go further. "For you, all eternity." she sighed as Yaz backed her against the console, and the two began kissing again.