Finding Mr. Wright Ch. 08

What I said had the intended effect, on both of us. I could feel Aaron enjoying the fantasy. While I relayed the story, I moved my face closer to him, closer to where my hand was touching him, my mouth inches from him, so close he could feel my breath on his manhood as I spoke. I used my off hand to touch his thighs again, but also moving up to gently play with his testicles. I wanted to arouse him and get him hot for me in the worst way. I wanted to use my mouth on him, but I didn't want to do that unless he asked me to or told me to. I don't think I could take the rejection if I tried and he told me to stop.

He opened his eyes again and when he spoke, he almost swallowed his words as he started. "Elizabeth, that's a powerful fantasy. I think it is one shared by many women, even if they won't admit to it. It's definitely something we can work on."

"Two more things and then I think we are done," he said quickly, moving on from my fantasy. "First, how do you feel about being nude around other people? Not like in a public mall or something crazy like that. I mean in the context of the Society manor, like on display for others to see, or involved in activities while others watch."

I had mixed feelings on this, as I was very self-conscious of my body and my appearance. Exercising had helped me trim down a bit, but I still thought I had a long way to go. "I'm not sure, Sir. I'm not as young or as pretty as the other women I saw last month in the Society, and my body is nothing compared to theirs. I don't want people looking at me and comparing me to them, or thinking I shouldn't take off my clothes or even be there at all."

"Elizabeth," he began, with an air of reproach in his voice, "even if you were 20 years older and 50 pounds heavier, you'd still be more beautiful and sexier than almost all of the women there. Even if you don't see it, we do ... I do. But even then, that's not how we look at people. We appreciate a person for what they are on the inside and what they are doing, for their own enjoyment and for those they are with, even those watching. It takes a lot of courage to take off your clothing in front of a group of people, even if you are a supermodel. We respect that and even if the person isn't the most beautiful or perfectly built, we all enjoy what they are doing and the excitement they get from doing it." He stopped to let me understand that, and once the thought really permeated my mind, I did. In focusing on my own self-doubt, I had never looked at it in that way he presented it ... from the perspective of someone recognizing and appreciating what you were doing, not just what they were seeing.

"But you ...," he shook his head as if he couldn't believe what I'd said, "... I'd put you up against anyone else in the Society ... anyone. And you'd win, hands down."

I smiled, and though I appreciated the compliment ... and it made me feel really good to hear him say it ... I didn't believe him. It made me feel really good to be appreciated and desired, something that I haven't felt in a long, long time. However, I've seen Brooke and some of the other women, like the lady in the shibari ropes. I knew better.

"Okay, last topic," he said. "What about your sexuality? Are you completely straight ... or bi--sexual, or ...?" he trailed off, letting me fill in the blanks.

I figured he was going to ask me that question sooner or later, so I had my answer ready, or so I thought. "If you had asked me this a month ago, I would have said I was completely straight. However, I don't know about 'completely.' Growing up, I was always disgusted at the thought of being with another woman, but to be honest, lately, I don't know. I do know that I definitely prefer men."

"But you might be open to the idea of another woman?" he asked.

"Honestly, I really don't know. I think it would depend on a very specific situation ... or person," I added quickly. Brooke came to mind, but it was difficult to think about her or my new feelings on that subject when I'm naked in front of Aaron and stroking him.

"Very well then, I won't push you on this, I respect that." Good ... I was happy to change that subject, as all my life I thought I knew my feelings there, but lately, in exploring my own sexuality, even those feelings were changing and evolving. I really didn't know how I felt about it.

He paused for a few minutes, just relaxing, letting me continue as I touched him and held him, still moving my hand slowly and methodically. Throughout all of this discussion, I had never stopped. I tried to vary it up, both to keep him excited and hard and to stop my arm from getting tired. It was really turning me on as well, touching Aaron like this, being naked in front of him, and discussing intimate and wild topics. I wondered what would be next.