Five Stages of Infidelity

When Marcy and I got home, Matt was already in his room and Audrey was waiting with her apology to Marcy. Again, still in her work clothes but smelling like she just got out of a shower.

"Marcy I am so sorry, I had car troubles and couldn't pick you up. I got a rental, but by that time dad had already picked you up".

"It's alright mom, I JUST made it to the competition on time, thanks to dad. That's the second time in a row you have missed my recitals. I hope work is really working out for you". Marcy stormed off to her room.

Audrey pleading to me, "It wasn't my fault, I had car problems!".

"I called your work after lunch and they told me you had already left for the day. You had over two hours to get Mary, what happened?"

Audrey froze and stopped breathing for three full seconds. Then she regained her composure and said, "I had some errands and I thought I had plenty of time to get them done. I didn't know my car would stop working".

I looked Audrey in the eye for a few seconds watching her fidget slightly. When she caught what she was doing she froze and stared back at me.

"What errands were you running? You never mentioned anything to me". I stared at her hard.

"Nothing. Just some stuff. Some things I needed done".

I said, "Well, I hope that little 'thing' you needed done was more important than your daughter's love, because you're on pretty thin ice with that stunt". I then walked up to bed, in the spare bedroom, where I had been sleeping, alone.

Well, at least I was able to answer the question I had idly wondered. Audrey didn't give a shit about missing our kid's events. Fucking Douche was all she cared about. She was only concerned about getting caught. If she really cared, she would have cancelled her fuck fest for the day. Instead, she used her kids event as an excuse to get out of work earlier, so she could spend more time fucking Douche.

The next time was going to really hurt.

The mechanics couldn't find any problem with Audrey's car.

Marcy pushed Audrey's buttons when she heard about the car, "Hey mom, remember you said you would take me and my friends to the mall this Saturday, can you let me know now if you don't want to take us? We don't want to be stuck at the mall while you're out having car problems again". Matt heard from the other room and laughed loudly yelling, "Good one Marcy!". You would think the kids were feeling neglected by their mother.

Audrey actually had the audacity to whine to me afterwards about it and asked me to speak with the kids about how they should speak to their mother.

"I'll consider it Audrey, while I am waiting for your apology in the guest room".

She didn't like the irony. She just got upset and blamed my guest room isolation on me for being stubborn.

Saturday I ended up dropping off and picking up Marcy and her friends at the mall. Audrey said she had work to do. Audrey didn't go to Douche's apartment or a hotel, but her car did stay a couple hours at a house. I looked it up, the house was listed, but who was there with her? When we got home, Marcy made a big show to thank me in front of her mom. Marcy emphasized how much she appreciated me taking the time to chauffeur her and her friends around. Marcy then called her friend and ignored Audrey's questions. Audrey looked like she was going to complain to me, but I started chuckling at her, picked up my drink, and locked myself in my office.

Audrey still had her work clothes on, but she smelled like she had just taken a shower. She had fucked in someone's house she was selling? I hope she had the decency to at least change the sheets afterwards. Though I doubt it.

Matt's birthday party was coming up. We decided to rent out six lanes in a bowling alley and have his friends and family spend some time bowling together. It took a while, but I found a bowling alley that did not have any league on a Wednesday night. What luck!

When I told Audrey all about it, she visibly swallowed hard. I guess Wednesdays weren't the best for her.

I told Audrey I would pick up both kids and some extras who were going to the party. I needed her to pick up the cake and candles from the grocery store. We would blow out the candles and eat pizza while Matt opened presents. Then we would all bowl for a couple of hours.

The week before the week of Matt's birthday party, I had to kill Douche's car three times, to stop them from meeting. The week of, they decided to do a Tuesday lunch, so I had to kill his car for good. Douche had to take his car to the shop instead. They couldn't find anything wrong, and he got his car back late that afternoon. I was hoping their pent-up frustration would make the Wednesday a go.

I was relieved when I saw Audrey's text, this time, on Wednesday morning, "Looking forward to seeing you".

A little after lunchtime, her phone GPS showed her moving towards Douche's apartment. Plenty of time for her to have some fun, get the cake, and make it to the party. It also gave me plenty of time to pick up Audrey's present, have some fun, get the kids, and make it to the party.

I went and got a car I had rented for this special occasion. I needed a car with a large trunk just in case Audrey's present opened in the car.

After making sure Audrey's phone was in Douche's apartment, I took my bag and Audrey's present to Douche's front door. Gently placing the pet cage, which was blacked out with black cloth, against Douche's front door, I pulled the cage door straight up, opening the cage. The front of the cage was now only blocked by Douche's door.

I then took my, recently purchased, handy dandy door breaching ram, took 3 practice swings, then smashed it into the door with a very loud crash. I took my taser from my pocket and briefly discharged it against the metal cage. A very large and very pissed off skunk sprang into the room. I quickly reached into the room and pulled the door shut, as the skunk was raising to fire at me. I quickly made my way back to the rental car.

After driving off, I connected to Audrey's phone microphone. There was screaming and hollering. I could hear Douche vomiting. A good sign, he must have got hit with the skunk's perfume. I could hear Douche telling my wife to call the police, so I locked her phone. She would think she had mis-entered the code too many times in her panic. From the sound, Douche had to open his bedroom door to get his phone out of the living room. From the yelling, the skunk let go another successful shot. Douche finally got hold of the police and told them there was a wild animal in his apartment, and that he needed help.

The police arrived in about 15 minutes. Seeing signs of forced entry, the police entered with their guns drawn. The skunk fired first. I heard both the cops shouting and vomiting, before they got the apartment door closed. It took a couple of hours for animal control to arrive, then subdue and capture the skunk.

After animal control left, 2 smelly cops sat across from 2 smelly persons, Audrey and Douche. Two other cops had arrived to assist, but when they smelled the apartment, they quickly departed.

Cop, "Who is the resident of this place?"

Douche, "I am".

"And who are you?"

"Here is my driver license".

Cop, looking at Audrey, "Do you live here?"

Audrey, "No, I was just visiting".

"Do you have some ID".

"Is this really necessary".

"Listen lady, I just got sprayed by a skunk and vomited for over 5 minutes straight. DON'T PLAY GAMES WITH ME! I AM NOT IN THE MOOD!"

"Here is my license".

"So how do you know 'Douche'?"

"We work together".

"So what are you doing here?"

"We came by to pick up some papers".

After some talking on their mic's to confirm Audrey's and Douche's identities, the Cop asked, "So what was the skunk doing in the apartment".

Douche started to answer, but Audrey cut him off, "It was a birthday gift from me".

"You bought a full-grown skunk as a birthday gift for your boyfriend?"

"He's not my boyfriend".

"Cut the crap lady, Boyfriend, Girlfriend, Co-worker, whatever! Why would you buy a full-grown skunk as a birthday gift for your boyfriend?"

"Well, I didn't, but I did. I bought the skunk. But it was supposed to be young and neutered so it wouldn't smell or spray. 'Douche' told me he liked skunks and always wondered what it would be like to have one, so I surprised him. It wasn't supposed to be full grown. They delivered it to the door and when 'Douche' opened the bag the thing flew out and sprayed him".

The cop obviously not buying this bullshit, but not liking sitting there stinking either said, "The skunk must have been expensive?"

"Kinda, but not too bad", Audrey said trying to play it down.

"You buy expensive pets for all your coworkers without you husband's knowledge or just your boyfriend?"

Audrey didn't answer. Boyfriend it is.

"And what about the door?"

Douche, "I accidentally busted it yesterday and hadn't had a chance to fix it yet".

I can only imagine, the officer must have stared at them both for the full minute of silence then he said, "All right, both of you, I know you are both full of bullshit, but I am sick of this smell and am getting out of here. The only reason you and your BOYFRIEND are getting off is because you both stink worse than me or my partner, and I am not stinking up the back of my squad car with you two".

With that I heard them leaving and the door being shut (being broken, it was loud to shut).

Douche, "What the hell was that all about".

Audrey always the bright girl, "We couldn't tell them someone kicked open your door and threw a skunk in your apartment!"

"Why not?"

"Because, they would have questioned my husband about what happened! If he did it, he already knows! If he didn't do it, then they would have to tell him I was here!"

Audrey speaking sweetly, "Be truthful 'Douche', how many other women are you fucking?"

"None", with indignance.

"When was the last time you fucked another woman besides me?"

"About a month ago", with humility.

Audrey loudly, "You prick, for how long?"

"For about 8 months".

Audrey even louder, "You were fucking her the whole time you were fucking me!"

"There was another one about six months ago too", he mumbled.

"Did their husbands find out!"

"What makes you think they were married?"

"Cause I know what gets you off, now answer the question".

"Yeah both".

"Did they know it was you specifically?"

"I'm not sure".

"Great. Now I'm positive I did the right thing lying to the cops. It was most likely one of your other conquest's husbands getting revenge. Either way, I am going to find out if my husband was the culprit".

Douche, "If it was, I am going to kick his ass".

My wife's phone rings.

Me, "Hi Audrey have you got the cake yet?". I know she could hear bowling pins being knocked down in the background.

"Shit, I got caught up working, I'm leaving right now".

"Aw Audrey, don't let Matt down too".

"I'm leaving right now, don't worry". Audrey hung up.

From her phone mic.

Audrey, "Shit! Matt's birthday party, I have to get the cake".

Next, I heard Audrey taking a shower, dressing, and leaving Douche's apartment. When Audrey's GPS showed her about halfway to the grocery store. I killed her car. After her fourth try to start it, I let it start. It died 3 more times on the way to the grocery store. Luckily it started each time after it died. She was going to be very late for Matt's party.

When Audrey got to the store, I heard her apologizing to the bakery staff that she had hit a skunk. They were quick to help her on her way.

Audrey made it to the bowling alley near the end. When Audrey came up carrying the cake, we all covered our noses and started gagging. After a very quick discussion, Matt pleaded with his mom to just go home.

After the party was over on the drive home, Matt asked me why mom was always missing his and Marcy's events. I told him she was doing what she thought was best for the family, and sometimes it's hard to be in two places at once.

Matt, "But you are always there for Marcy and me and you bring home way more money?"

"Well, I have more flexible hours, so it makes it easier for me to be with my two favorite skunks in the whole world."

Marcy, "Not funny dad!"

"It will be when you tell all your friends about it tomorrow at school". "Even the birthday cake stank so bad we had to throw it away". "Birthday Stank Cake!"

They both thought that was very funny.

I was very glad to be sleeping in the guest room that night.

A few days later, after Audrey had bathed in gallons of tomato juice multiple times, I saw Audrey sticking her head into my car and smelling all the upholstery. It was hilarious watching my wife. She looked like a mouse trying to sniff out some cheese.

When she came back in the house, I quietly followed her upstairs to the master bedroom closet. I watched her around the corner using my phone in video mode. I got a nice shot of her dropping down on all fours and sniffing all my shoes.

I never did ask her why her car didn't smell like skunk, on the outside.

Two Saturdays later, I told everyone I had some hardware shopping to do. After asking everyone if they wanted to go to the hardware store with me, and getting negative grunts in return, I headed out alone. I headed straight to Douche's apartment. His car was there, that was a good sign.

I knocked on his door. He answered the door and asked, "Can I help you?"

"Actually, I think we can help each other. I am Audrey's husband. Can I come in?"

After his face going pale, I pushed my way past him and sat down at his kitchen table. I invited him to sit down at the table with me. I could smell fresh paint and a lingering smell of skunk. All the furniture and carpet looked new.

"I know you have been fucking my wife Audrey for over six months".

"Hey man, I don't know what anyone has been telling you, but it is all lies, were just friends".

"Would a few pictures and a video recording of your normal Wednesday liaisons jog your memory?"

"I don't know what you're talking about!"

"Cut the shit Douche, I know you have been fucking my wife and I have proof. You don't matter to me. What my wife is doing does. So, here is the deal. Instead of hiring a private detective to get incriminating pictures of my wife fucking you, I thought I would just offer you the money instead".

"You want me to video tape me fucking your wife?"

"It would be worth $2000 to you".

Douche sat staring at me for a minute, letting his feeble brain absorb what I was suggesting. He looked around at all the new furniture he had just paid for.

"Two Grand? For a tape of me fucking your wife? Are you for real?"

"Yes I am. Two Grande for a tape of you fucking my wife. It must show her face and body and the actual penetration. I will also need a written consent form from you stating that you created the video and authorized the sale of the video to me".

"If you have so much proof, why do you need the video?"

"I want more leverage in a divorce".

"Man, me betraying her like that would be ice cold".

"Oh, you mean like how she is betraying me and her kids?"

In almost a whisper, "Yeah, like that".

"Two Grande, and I don't tell the other two husbands who was fucking their wives quite recently. To sweeten the deal, I'll even pay for a Spa Day for two, a couple of towns over. You can fuck her all day at the hotel spa on a Saturday".

Douche sat silently eyeing me carefully.

"Man, you are one cold dude. Make it Three Grand and you have a deal".

"Great, no mention of this to Audrey, of course. I will get the Spa and hotel reservations setup and paid for under your name. It will be for next Saturday. On the evening of the Monday afterwards, I will call you to schedule the pickup of the video. I will pay you in cash. Is everything clear?"

"Yes".

"Good. Make sure to get her face in focus in the shots. I will email you the consent form later today. You will be hearing from me the Monday after". I then left his apartment and continued my hardware shopping.

Wednesday evening. Audrey, "Honey I forgot to tell you I have a conference this Saturday a couple of towns over. Will that be a problem?"

"No, looks like it will be a slow weekend this Saturday. Have fun at your conference".

Monday evening. I called Douche and told him I would pick him up in front of his apartment. He asked why and I mentioned that I didn't want to end up in any videos.

I picked him up and told him not to say anything. I drove him out the interstate to a rarely used rest stop. I had him get out and I scanned him with a metal detector. Once he was clear, I had him get back in the car.

"Do you have what I want?"

"Yeah, here it is", and he handed me a thumb drive.

I pull my laptop from the back seat and plugged in the thumb drive.

The video camera must have been sitting on the dresser at the end of the bed. It showed an empty bed, then Douche laid on his back on the bed. Audrey came into the picture and climbed between his legs and started giving him a blowjob. Several minutes later, Audrey was swallowing his cum. They then switched positions and Douche went down on Audrey. All I could see was the back of his head, but I had a clear view of Audrey's face and her pulling on her nipples till she came.

The next scene the camera showed a side view of the bed. Audrey completely naked climbed on the bed on all fours. Douche climbed on the bed behind her and began pushing his eight-inch dick into her pussy. Douche grabbed her hips and started pounding her pussy while Audrey rubbed her pussy. Audrey climaxed after about 10 minutes.

Douche then pulled his dick from her pussy, lubed up his dick with some KY and began pushing his dick up her butt. After the head popped in, Audrey reached back and held his leg. They both sat motionless for about a minute, then Audrey began pushing backwards, taking more and more of his dick on each stroke. After a couple of minutes, Douches was balls deep into her ass. Douche sat still as Audrey slammed her ass against him.

"God I love being fucked in the ass! It feels so good. Rub my pussy baby!"

Douche reached around and began rubbing her pussy and Audrey began slamming into him harder. After 10 minutes of fucking Audrey came again screaming incoherently. As soon as she began coming, Douche grabbed her hips and began pounding her ass until he came deep inside her.

The next video was of them fucking missionary where Douche pulled out at the end and came all over her face.

The last video was of them in a sixty-nine licking and sucking each other off.

I told Douche, "Perfect, exactly what I was looking for. Do you have the consent form?"

Douche pulled an envelope out of his jacket and handed it to me. I opened the envelope and checked the date and signature were correct. I took a picture of it and sent it to myself. I pulled an envelope out of the side door panel and handed it to Douche. He counted all the hundreds in the envelope twice, with a big grin on his face.

When I dropped him off at his house, he said, "If you need another video let me know. That is the most fun I ever had making money".

ANGER

On Tuesday, I first told my brother and his wife what was happening. I showed them a short clip of the doggie-style-anal video. Then a few pictures of the other videos. The sixty-nine shot. A short video of Douche cumming on her face. I also showed them a list of dates she met with Douche, with highlights in yellow, the family events she had missed while she was with Douche instead.

Next, I showed her parents a picture of Audrey doing the doggie-style-anal video. I heavily redacted most of the picture. It only showed Audrey's and Douche's heads and legs from the knees down. I didn't want them to be haunted by a picture I showed them, but I also did not want Audrey lying her way out with her parents.