Full Circle Ch. 05 - Into the Darkness

"I was with Julia."

The words hung in the air, stinking like yesterday's garbage. It was one of Elaine's worst nightmares.

"As in Julia Rizzo? Where... at her club?" she asked, flabbergasted. This wasn't one of the scenarios Elaine had gone through in the four hours she was waiting.

"Uh huh," Syl glumly acknowledged.

Elaine snatched her wine glass off the table and finished it, trying to control her emotions.

"Did you fuck her?" There was venom in Elaine's voice. Syl cowered.

"No... yes... I'm not sure."

"What does that mean?"

"I let her touch me, then I kind of blacked out."

Syl left out the detail that the black out happened after the most intense orgasm of her life.

"Fuck Sylvia. Why did you have to do that? I thought we had something together."

"We do," Syl said, starting to cry.

"You have a fucked-up way of showing it."

"Can I explain?"

"Wait a second." Elaine went into the kitchen and fetched another bottle of wine, a corkscrew and a glass. She handed Syl the glass and poured out the rest of the open bottle into their glasses.

"I've got all night and I'm already half drunk. I might as well keep drinking. So tell me. Tell me why you lied to me and you went and had sex with that temptress." Elaine plopped down into the white leather sofa. Red wine sloshed out of her glass and onto the leather.

"Oops," said Elaine, using a tissue to blot up the wine, though leaving a bright red stain. "I guess everything's going to get fucked up tonight."

Then she resisted the urge to scream. Instead, she made a snarky comment.

"So tell me Syl, what was it like to fuck that hussy?"

Syl wiped a tear off her cheek and took a deep breath to compose herself. She looked Elaine in the face.

"I don't know who I am any more. And it scares me Elaine. I didn't want to hurt you. Truly. But something happened to me. Something I don't understand. It started with you. That night. With the nipple clamps. Do you remember?"

Elaine's anger started to fade. She sensed where this conversation was going and realized part of this was her fault.

"I remember."

"And we'd made love many times before, but that time was different. You sensed it, didn't you?"

Elaine took a sip of her wine. She did sense it. Now her fears were coming to fruition. She'd have to confess her past. All of it. She knew they couldn't go forward without Syl knowing. No doubt Julia had already told her, but Sylvia would want to hear it from her own lips.

"I did."

"And you didn't tell me about who you were... that you were a Domme. Were you ashamed of your past?"

Elaine felt like the momentum of the conversation had completely reversed. She was on the defensive when she was the one waiting for four hours for Sylvia to return.

"I'm not ashamed of anything I did."

"Then why didn't you tell me?"

Elaine had rationalized it to herself but never articulated it. She stumbled out of the gate.

"I... I... wanted to, but..." Her voice faltered.

"You didn't think I'd understand."

"No."

"You didn't think I was open minded enough to accept who you were."

"I guess I didn't," Elaine reluctantly conceded. But Sylvia was pushing her hard and it was Sylvia who lied and cheated. It didn't seem fair.

"I should have told you but that doesn't excuse what you did."

Sylvia's head dipped low. "I'm ashamed of what I did."

"Julia? Of all people?" Elaine said, her righteous indignation growing again.

Sylvia blinked hard to hold back her tears.

"I've never lied to anyone and then I lied to you."

"You're a shitty liar. I knew you weren't going to meet whatever his name is. Why did you do this to me?"

Syl found Elaine's comment highly offensive. Was this all about Elaine?

"Fuck you Elaine. You're being a selfish bitch. I didn't do this to hurt you." Her own indignation made her voice her well-founded suspicions.

"And besides, what were you doing with Carol? I heard what was going on in there. You fucking lied to me, didn't you?"

Elaine wanted to deny it but she knew Syl wouldn't believe her. But how did she know?

"Were you eavesdropping on us?"

"So there was an 'us'?"

Elaine was trapped. She tried to justify it to herself as blackmail sex, though it was a flimsy excuse.

"It's not what you think."

"I heard everything and I can think of a lot of things. Like whipping. And by the way, the sound from Carol's bedroom carries down into the kitchen through the ventilation system."

This was not going well for Elaine at all. She was used to getting her way... always. And now a woman almost half her age had her pinned to the mat.

"It's not as if we're exclusive. Are we?" Elaine spat out, undermining her other argument with Syl, and then realizing what she'd done.

"My point exactly. You didn't want me going with Julia because you don't like her, not because we're exclusive. You proved that. You're the hypocrite Elaine. You fuck whoever you want but if I step out? That's a cardinal offense? Look at yourself in the mirror. We're the same and you just don't want to admit it. We haven't decided if we're right for each other and right now I'd say the answer to that is no."

Elaine's rising anger was in part due to her own miscalculation about telling Syl the truth from the outset. Anger plus Elaine was a bad combination. She couldn't help but lash out at Syl.

"You're finally right about something. We're not right for each other. Better get packing. I'll have my car out front in ten minutes."

"I can't pack in ten minutes."

"You can pack what you need for tonight. I'll set you up with a suite at the Ritz and have Geraldo bring the rest of your things tomorrow."

"So that's it?" Syl asked, tears running down her cheeks.

Elaine realized harsh words were exchanged in the heat of the moment. She tried to soften her stance.

"For now," she said. "We've both got trust issues and it doesn't make sense to stay together until we sort them out. Why don't we spend a few days apart and think about it? You've probably got to get back to the shop anyway."

Elaine was right. Syl had dropped everything and her brother Gio couldn't be asked to hold the fort at the service station for more than a couple days. She had to get back, even if she wanted to stay. She went over and kissed Elaine dispassionately on the cheek.

"Goodbye Elaine... at least for now."

Syl went into Elaine's bedroom to pack a few things for the night. Elaine wasn't in the living room when she went to leave so Syl left, closing the front door behind her. With an overnight bag in hand Syl went outside the building and towards Geraldo, waiting with the Maybach to spirit her away to the Ritz. As the car pulled away she looked back, watching the apartment building shrink in the distance, wondering if she'd ever see Elaine again. Had she stepped into the darkness, never to return? It was her question to answer, and the answer, she suspected, was in the Red Room.

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Next: The Red Room