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"I will give you everything you want if you let me free."
"I want the two pictures taken with your inopportune anachronistic flash, and I want you to give up shooting your arrows around Penelope or Ulysses for a whole year. No one must fall in love with Penelope because of you, or with Ulysses. I want my two worshippers free to fall in love without you blinding their eyes. If it has to happen, it will happen because they both want it, with all their hearts and all their brains, and not because they enjoy playing with a bow like a little child. Are we on the same page?"
"What is a page? Ugh! Please Athena your long spear bumps me! What did the bearded man say? If you get by violence it is an extor- Ouch! You can't treat me like this, I'm the son of... Ow! This is extortion... OK, OK, just kidding... deal?"
"Deal". Athena wandered: It's Tough To Be A Goddess... I must suggest those words to Sir Elton John.
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The End (for the moment: but the adventures of Penelope and Ulysses are not over, at lease in my mind).
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#### Dear reader. I hope you are not offended because of such a sudden interruption. The narration develops in other chapters: about how Penny will receive a Proposal, about some unfaithful wife (not Penny), about how many obstacles can arise before two lovebirds can live a perfect married life on an island near Croatia. Penny will always be a caring and faithful wife: she will never be a hotwife craving for cuckolding. That will never happen. Some elements are already defined, and others can be influenced by constructive comments.
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This is a narrative of pure fiction. The anachronisms are only apparent: the deities and nymphs draw on information that transcends the human boundaries of time and space. I know that dad jokes are bad, not only in appearance but also in substance. I'm sorry, I can't help myself.
Penelope's night dreams as she masturbates, murmuring the same words we hear in "Holding Out For A Hero", by the great voice of Bonnie Tyler, 1984 (even in "Footloose" movie soundtrack): also the subject of numerous covers, last but not least by Jennifer Saunders ad Fairygoodmother in "Shrek 2" (2004: big successful movie), with an epic uptempo and bloody chorus; and many other covers after.
It might seem that some of the lines are inspired by Lin-Manuel Miranda's Broadway musical "Hamilton" (song "The Schuyler Sisters"), but perhaps over the centuries rich girls have always uttered analogous sentences, and so have rich harbor-side stalkers. It's just a parody, just joking.
Neither ancient Greek nor modern English is my mother tongue: enjoy some ideas and please forgive my mistakes. ###
- COMMENTS
Anonymous7 months agoWhy are Agamemnon and Menelaus from Crete and not Mycenae? Is there a motivation in the plot, or is it just a mistake?
Anonymous7 months agoYou missed a great opportunity to write a medieval tale. when you have time, search youtube for Hildegard von Blingin' & Whitney Avalon's Bardcore cover of your Holding out for a hero.
At minute 2:30 the modified verses read: 'Up where Dragons glide close to the sky, in a stormy Odyssey, a holy champion rides towards me through the wind and the chill and the rain...'.
A real shame. A great opportunity lost.
