All Comments on 'Hypnosis Everafter Ch. 03'

Very enjoyable. Looking forward to the next update

The story is good and fun :) I'm enjoying it and look forward to the next.

I have one suggestion however. You seem to be quite partial to commas and semicolons when you really don't need them.

eg. this sentence here: "She thought, if she could get Dave back, she would have; what Kim had now."

None of those commas nor the semicolon are necessary.

I have enjoyed the story. It is getting a bit repetitive and not much in the way of conflict.

Why do they talk in second person perspective?

They say "he" or "she" instead of "I"

Fun Fun Fun

Could have been funner if things got outa Dave's hands and Bob and/or Tim tore Kim up, Dave forced to give the orgasm command and watch as his wife climaxes on another man's cock while she is filled with his cum. Shocked and overwhelmed another non induced orgasms rips thru the now awake Kim at the forbidden act. Bob stays hard, happily finding himself buried in his wife's shy and sexy best friend starts to fuck her in earnest. Dave is paralyzed as he is too stunned, confused and shocked to fully process what went wrong. Kim looking to him for help and support reads his non objection to mean he must approve and want this, she submissively gets into it and really starts to enjoy it as another non induced orgasm tears thru on the heals of the last...

At least that's how it should've turned out seeing as you used the nuclear option on Bob and Tim. And clearly Dave is 'accidentally' attuning all the wives to lust after him, the selfish bastard.