I'll Try It Ch. 06

We exchanged some information and he managed to make a transfer into my bank account within a few hours. We got up and thanked Dr. Teigen for his time and left feeling some resolution. We just walked casually processing the situation. The office building was in a business park, and we ended up walking around the grounds for a while and I even took his hand looking up and smiling.

"You know ... I'm okay with this. I mean it's not ideal and I'd rather go back to my normal self, but it is what it is. Things could be worse. Besides, I'm the one who took it. I should have realized it was different. This is my fault.

Mark was quiet but held my hand as we turned around a fountain and found a bench to sit on. It was actually a very nice day out and it was good to just relax in the sunshine for a minute.

I explained, "So here is what we can do. I'm going to tell my parents tonight. I'm not afraid. They are going to be shocked; I'll be a little embarrassed, but it'll be fine. Tomorrow, we can head into work and tell Barb and the others. I can still work. Tomorrow after work, we are going shopping. I only got a couple outfits yesterday and I want to look good while I'm like this."

He smiled as I broke the tension. I was really getting used to the idea. I'm going to be a bit embarrassed the next few days, but I'll live.

"You're so great Jaycee. I'm sorry this happened but you're right. We should make the most of it. Maybe... if you're up for it... I'd love to take you out on a real date."

I lit up, "Really?" The idea of going out on a real date felt very exciting.

"Yeah, the first night was more of just letting you get used to it. Yesterday, it was a girl's day, so you and 'I' didn't really do anything. I want to make that right."

"I'd really like that, Mark."

We casually sat there for a little more and then I broke the silence with a question, "So I don't think you told me how you started this? How did you find out about this stuff and what made you try it?"

"Well, there is kind of a story to it. Do you remember me dating Olivia a few years ago?"

I thought for a minute, and it came to me, "Oh yeah. She was really cute. I liked her."

He smiled, "Well Olivia, was really Oliver." And laughed just a bit.

"NO WAY! Really?!?" Grabbing his arm excited to hear more.

"Yeah. I didn't know it at the time. We just met at a party like I said back then. I asked her out and we went out a few times and she was so great. We were making out one night and things were all heading in the right direction if you know what I mean."

I nodded listening.

"Well before she would do more, she got all serious and she said she had to tell me something. I figured she was going to tell me she had some STD or something so the mood was we'll say, 'going down'. But then she told me that what she looks like isn't really who she is. It took her forever to get it out but finally she confessed she was really a guy. As you can guess... I freaked out thinking she was some TG or something and waiting for her to whip her dick out."

I giggled and turned on the bench entranced with the story.

"Well, I was about to bail but she stopped me and explained more. She even stripped to show me how she really was all woman which on one hand was totally hot but on the other hand confusing as hell. She pulled out her driver's license and showed me her real picture."

"Wow... I'll bet you felt all sorts of different things at that point. On one hand, a hot naked girl, on the other feeling so confused."

"Exactly! I was so confused but I admit, I was curious as hell and, unfortunately, that was when she pulled her dress back on, so I knew we weren't going to do anything." He said with a smirk. "And we sat down and talked through it all. The mood was gone but I have to say that when I realized who I met, who I knew, and who I was attracted to was all woman."

"Did you ever meet Oliver?"

"No, and she was adamant she didn't want me to. She said I knew her as Olivia, and she was the only one I'd ever meet."

"I'll bet you were curious."

"Sure. I saw his picture on his license, but I had feelings for Olivia, and I liked her, so we kept going out. The next date, we had A LOT of fun. Damn she was hot."

I giggled a bit remembering her. "So how did this lead you to try the pills?"

"Well, we did a lot of talking and the more she talked about it, the more curious I was. I'll admit to you that I even wondered what it was like for years even before this pill was even an idea. She told me she did it because she was in this trial study and if I wanted to, she could see about getting me into it because they were still looking for participants. And it paid money! That was when I met Dr. Teigen and his group. I interviewed and met the parameters they were looking for, so I was in, but he told me there were some serious risks. This was back when it was all new. They never had any problems, and it went smoothly so far, but I had to know it was still a trial drug which kinda freaked me out."

"Yeah, I heard a lot of rumors about this stuff. I hear some people turned into hermaphrodites and some would never change back. Some turned into weird version of intersex and never recovered."

"I hadn't heard any of that since this was new. The first few times I did it was here at their office because they were really interested in the actual transition and if there were any side effects, so they had me lay on a table naked and recorded the whole thing every time I did it. They took DNA and blood tests. They tracked everything after I took a pill such as what order my body changed, how much pain there was, how long each stage took, and how I compared before and after. Early on it took a lot longer to change until they figured out the right dosage. I will say they helped me a lot in figuring out clothes, make-up, hair, and other things."

"I thought you were new to this, but I guess you've been trying this for a while."

"Yes and no. I was in a trial a few years ago and that was my first try at it. It lasted a few months with a test about every week or two. Most of the tests were in the office so I never really got out in public with two exceptions. They wanted to observe other people's responses to me and see if anyone felt something was off. They eventually had to stop because they had all the data they needed for approvals. Those approvals took years and just recently, it is all done and going out on the full market. You'll probably start seeing ads for it. Anyone can get them now and he invited me back if I wanted a personal prescription from one of the doctors he works with. That is when he called me."

"So, what ever happened with Olivia?" I asked.

"Oh... she ended up getting into a relationship. At least Oliver did so we broke things off."

I just took his hand and leaned in against his shoulder. I felt bad that Mark, my best friend in the whole world, went through this alone. I think of him trying all of this alone just with strangers. He couldn't talk about it or share anything. I felt bad that I wasn't the kind of friend he could confide in. I rubbed his hand and said, "I'm sorry you did this all alone. I would have been there for you. I care about you, and I hate thinking you went through this scary stuff alone."

He put his hand around me holding me close and said, "You know, It wasn't all scary and I always knew you would have been there if I needed you. I guess I was just feeling curious about something and wanted to try it out. I can promise you that if I had needed to talk to someone, you would have been my first and only choice."

I looked up into his eyes and I felt my stomach churn. I couldn't help it and I leaned in and gave him a quick peck on the lips. Mark and I have always been so close, but as Jaycee, I feel so different about him. Our friendship feels so different. I feel so attracted to him it's hard to control.

He paused and said, "Hey there... um... are you hungry? Let's go grab a bite to eat. We should come up with a plan for how you want to tell your family."

"I'd love to."

We made our way to a fast-food place and in a way, it already felt like a date. I felt so twisted inside. An odd mix of nervousness, excitement, and curiosity. Both by my current situation but also because I was with Mark. He was the same guy I knew but I see how good of a man he is. He is kind. He's generous. He's protective. In a way, I felt like the luckiest girl to be with him here and the other girls can just fuck off.

As far as my current situation, the idea of what my mom and dad were going to say weighed on me. I felt good about it, and I knew it was going to shock them but once I explained things, I knew they'd understand. But I had to admit, I had a small part of my brain focusing on how things would go horribly wrong. Would they get mad? Would they laugh? Would they disown me? Would they get violent saying I'm not their son anymore? Would I be homeless tonight?

My core felt it is simply going to down to 'how' I told them. What to say. How to say things. I never felt such a deep desire to talk to them coupled with nervousness about how well the conversation went. Jason spoke in the back of my head thinking I should just say it as it is and not worry so much about other people and I winced entertaining the idea.

We talked about how we could ease them into it. After a little debate, Mark had the best idea, so we decided I should text them and let them know something big is going on and that I wanted to talk to both of them. After sending, Mom said that Jayla is over at a friend's studying so she wouldn't be home until late. I told her Mark was going to come over first and talk to them and then I'll come in and talk to.

Her rapid responses clearly showed concern and confusion. She darted questions probing if I was in an accident, am I on drugs, did I get a girl pregnant, am I moving to Europe? Did I get an STD? I assured her that everyone is safe and healthy. It's nothing terrible but it is a big deal. She then asked if I was gay, and I chuckled at the irony but told her that I'm very straight, but I thought about how she will likely be confused when she finds out the details.

We waited out the time until I knew they'd be home and we made the drive in silence. We parked a way down the street in case they, mostly my mom, might be looking out the window and I just stared into space a bit. I glanced down at me, my body, my legs wrapped in a dress. A month ago, I'd never believe this story. Today, it's the best thing I can do.

"Are you ready for this?" Mark asked.

I slowly turned and faked a smile while nodding yes. I was white, cold, shaking, and sweaty but Mark reached to me and rubbed my arm in a reassuring way and then quickly exited the car so I couldn't stop him.

I watched him walk down the street and the plan was for me to wait for a text.

The seconds ticked away, and I felt the air sucked out of the car by a specter of anxiety. I panicked but I did my best to calm myself. My chest tightened and I felt nauseous. Opening the windows, I leaned in, closed my eyes, and slowly tried controlling my breathing. The air danced over my face feeling great but wasn't enough to quelch my anxiety.

Seconds turned to minutes while my mind raced with all the things that could be going on in there. Part of me thought Mark's cool nature would sooth them and they'll completely understand like from the Sound of Music. They'd be finishing their second number about now. The other part of me knew my mom was having a heart attack and my dad having a stroke right now while Mark clamored for his phone which is now dead trying to call 911 and I'm not there to help.

My state forced me out of the car to stand in the open air. In the setting sun, I stood staring at my phone willing a text to come through. I felt the tears coming on and I got mad at myself knowing how hard it was to control them.

Then I saw it. My phone sparked, "Mark is typing".

I gripped the phone tight and pulled it close to my eyes to watch every pulse of the message. I was sending my thoughts into it craving an answer and praying for it to be the one I needed. It took forever like he was typing a novel but all that came through was, "Come in."

I took a deep breath not knowing if I was walking into a D-Day battle or a landing in beautiful relaxing Hawaii. A part of me needed to jump in the car and drive away but Mark took the keys. I shook my head, focused, and started walking hearing my heels click on the sidewalk thinking that I'm a running back and there is nothing you can say to change it.

My mind was screaming to stop. It said to turn back because I'm a fake. I'm not a woman. I'm a fake man taking a pill and pretending while making a fool of myself.

I pushed through it gritting my teeth. I hit the front steps and without stopping, I opened the door and walked in seeing my parents on the couch and Mark on the opposite side. They all snapped their heads looking at me. Their faces plastered with shock, surprise, familial joy, and anger.

All I could do was smile as I sheepishly curled my hair behind my ear and closing the door with a click.

"Hi mom. Hi dad."