Instant Photo

"Oh, Sarah, I just heard!" called Liz as she and Rachel approached. Liz sat down next to her and put her arm around her cousin.

"I can't believe he won't be there!" replied Sarah. "This is going to suck!"

"No it won't!" replied Liz. "I refuse to let that happen. Just come, please! You can forget about your Dad and Josh for the evening. You know you'll love the band! Hell, you can even get shit-faced! I'll make sure you have a ride home!"

"This weekend isn't happening at all the way I had planned," complained Sarah. "Now Josh is going to be gone for 2 weeks. How are we even going to celebrate his proposal?"

Liz gave Rachel a knowing look. "Sarah, no matter what happens, promise me you'll be at my wedding. I'll never forgive you if you don't show."

"I'll go," said Sarah as tears began to fill her eyes. "I'm just not happy about this."

"Listen. I have to go, I have things I need to finish before tomorrow," said Liz. "I love you Sarah, Happy Birthday." She gave her cousin a kiss. "Rachel, I don't care if you have to wrap her in a burlap sack and throw her in your trunk, make sure she goes to my wedding!"

Rachel smiled. "You can count on me!" Liz turned to leave and Rachel followed.

Sarah's glass of wine was empty, so she got up to get another pour. She made a plate of food too, but ended up just playing with it with her fork. Not a single morsel made it to her lips.

The party wore on and it was time for cake and presents. She was barely able to crack a smile as the crowd sang and Josh held her around her shoulder. The look she shot at Josh as he attempted to put the stupid conical hat on her head made him stop in his tracks. He thought better of it.

The array of gag gifts everyone seemed to think was appropriate did nothing to lighten Sarah's mood. When she opened the box that contained rolls of toilet paper that said 'Holy Shit! You're 30!', she wanted to throw them at the offender. Josh grabbed her arm before she could start the melee.

When she had gotten near the bottom of the pile she didn't see anything from Josh. "I thought you said you got me a present." she said.

"I did," Josh assured her. "But I want to give it to you privately."

Sarah smiled. 'Oh, he's shy. How cute,' she thought to herself. 'Maybe it's going to happen after all.'

Sarah endured the rest of the presents and well wishers. She found she couldn't wait until she and Josh were alone. She realized that they really hadn't been alone together in a long time. Her mind started to drift to receiving her present. She thought about how she'd jump into his arms and kiss him. She also thought about how she'd want him to take her to bed, and all the things they would do behind closed doors tonight.

When the last guest disappeared behind the door, Sarah turned to Josh and threw her hands around his neck. She brought him in for a passionate kiss. Josh broke the kiss but looked into her eyes. Sarah looked back up to him expectantly.

"I do have a gift for you," he said. "Would you like to go for a walk?"

"I'd love to," replied Sarah. She was impatient. When would he pop the question?

They put on their light jackets and headed out for their walk. They weren't half way down the first block when Sarah put her arm around Josh's back. As her hand reached around she felt it. A small ring sized box hidden in his coat pocket. Sarah smiled as she looked down.

As they reached the neighborhood park they walked along the perimeter of the lake until they came to a bench. Josh asked Sarah to sit. He sat down next to her. 'You know I love you right?" asked Josh.

"Right," said Sarah. It was a little game they would play. All the ways of saying 'I love you' without actually saying it.

"I'm sorry about tomorrow," said Josh. "Your dad is a slave driver."

"I know, I'm sorry too," replied Sarah. "I know it's not your fault. I don't blame you." She reached up and kissed his cheek.

"Good. I wouldn't want my best girl to be mad at me," he said. He reached into his pocket and pulled out his present. "Here, this is for you." He handed her the box.

A confused smile reached Sarah's lips. He wasn't getting down on one knee? It's obviously a ring box. Maybe he thinks that's too old fashioned. She carefully unwrapped the present. She held her breath as she flipped the top of the little jewelry box.

There it was. A pair of pearl earrings. Sarah's shoulders slumped. Tears formed in her eyes as she closed the lid. "I...I can't accept this," she said. She was still looking down.

"What? What do you mean?" asked Josh. "You can accept them, they didn't cost that much!"

This angered her even more. "I don't want these!" she shouted. "You know what I want! Why don't you want to marry me!?"

"Oh...that," said Josh.

"Yes! That! Dammit Josh!" she screamed. "It's been four years. How much longer do I have to wait?"

"I really didn't think..." started Josh.

"That's right Josh, you didn't think!" interrupted Sarah. "You know what? I'm done!" she threw the box back at him.

"No. Wait," said Josh. "I'll fix this. Just give me a little more time. I have to get on a plane in a few hours. At least give me until I get back!"

Sarah glared at him. Her nostrils were flaring as she tried to suck in the needed oxygen. She thought back to the ultimatum her mother had given her father. She realized it was the only way. "Fine!" she yelled. "You have 2 weeks. But if you come home without an engagement ring, don't even bother calling me!"

"Don't be that way, honey!" pleaded Josh. He tried to reach for her shoulder.

Sarah turned away. "Just Go! I want to be alone!"

Josh turned and disappeared into the night.

Sarah hung her head. Lucky for her the park was deserted. Noone could hear her sobs.

--

Sarah flung open the door of her apartment and threw the bag of presents into a corner. "That was the shittiest birthday ever!" she screamed to noone in particular. She threw herself onto her bed and started to cry again. After a few minutes she resolved to get up and take a shower. She hoped she could wash away her disappointment. She sobbed as the hot water cascaded over her naked body.

As the hot water faded, Sarah found herself shutting off the water and reaching for the towel. She stared at the fogged up mirror for what seemed like hours, but was really just a few minutes. As the fog receded she could see more and more of her face. The woman who looked back at her surprised her. She looked so run down. She had been crying for hours. She wiped the last tear from the corner of her eye.

Sarah finished drying herself off and put on a long nightgown. She noticed the bag of presents she had hastily chucked aside had spilled out onto the floor. The instant camera, box, film and the two pictures Josh had taken lay on the floor. She picked them up. The first picture was on top. She took them to her desk and flipped on the light to get a clearer view.

She examined the first picture. It looked like her, but there was something about it that seemed off. She looked at her eyes in the picture. Although there was a bit of a smile on her lips, her eyes couldn't mask the sadness. It was as if the woman in the picture was disappointed. It mimicked the feeling she had now. "I guess my sadness shows even through my picture," she thought.

She scanned the rest of the picture. She didn't see anything out of the ordinary until she came to her left hand. It was hard to see, but it looked like...a ring? She glanced down to her own hands. She hadn't worn a ring on her left hand this evening. She knew that. She didn't want anything to get in the way when Josh would slip her engagement ring on. A ring that never came. She looked closer at her hands in the picture.

It was hard to make out, but it was there. A gold band with what looked like a small diamond. Sarah wiped her eyes. She thought she must be seeing things with all the crying she had done. She looked back down at the photo. The ring was still there.

She shuffled the next picture to the top. What she saw shocked her. It looked like her, but the woman who looked back at her was much older. Crows feet and wrinkles were clearly visible. Gravity had pulled down her features. Sarah sucked in a breath in shock, covering her open mouth with her hand.

The eyes of this woman were even sadder. The depression she could feel in her eyes reached down into her soul. It was almost as if she could understand its source. Sarah shivered.

She glanced down to the woman's hands. There was no ring. Sarah did notice the woman had a charm bracelet. It showed a single charm. A stick figure representing a baby girl.

Sarah threw the pictures back onto the desk and sunk back in her chair. What had she just seen? She knew the first picture was her, but what about the ring? The second picture was much more worrying. She could see the resemblance, but wasn't sure. Could it just have been an old picture stuck in the camera? It must be. It doesn't look like her today. Sarah shook her head. It was all too unsettling.

Sarah crawled back into bed. She could barely keep the tears away. Mercifully, exhaustion led her into an uneasy sleep.

--

Sarah gazed at herself in the full length mirror. Even she had to admit she looked damn good in this dress. It showed a lot more skin than Sarah was normally comfortable with, but Liz had insisted she buy it when they went out shopping together. Sarah continued to evaluate the dress as she turned and looked over her shoulder. Although she wasn't happy about her circumstances, she resolved to try to have a good time today at Liz's wedding. They were lifelong friends and she owed it to Liz at least.

The wedding at the chapel was short but sweet. Liz looked as radiant as ever in her bridal gown. Sarah wiped away tears as they announced their vows. She could only wonder when her turn would arrive.

Rachel and Sarah found their table up front near the dance floor. Sarah was eager for the band to start playing as it was one of her favorite local groups, but now she was resolved to just sit and listen. Her plans of dancing the night away had been thrashed. She grabbed her first glass of champagne as the waiter passed by. She vowed to have many more of those tonight.

It didn't help that nearly everyone that knew her asked her where Josh was this evening. At one point she seriously thought of making a sign and posting it on the table. 'Josh isn't here - He's working - Get Over It!' she imagined it would say.

Dinner dragged on. Although the food was wonderful and the drink flowed, Sarah had had enough of the lame comments of her table mates. She couldn't wait for the band to drown out all conversation.

Finally the band took the stage. It wasn't long before the dance floor began to fill. Sarah sighed. She loved to dance, but without a partner this evening she'd be relegated to dancing with a few girl friends. Most everyone at the wedding seemed to be coupled up. Even Rachel met up with an old college friend and was spending time with him. She felt so alone.

The band was a few songs into their first set when they began a line dance song. Sarah chuckled. Most of the guys who were on the dance floor made a beeline for the bar. Some of their girlfriends meandered back to their seats, but a few stayed on with the line dance. That's when Sarah noticed a tall man in a cowboy hat line up with the rest of the ladies on the floor.

"Hmmm...that cowboy can dance!" she thought. She noticed he picked right up on the steps and seemed to be all smiles. The ladies all gathered around him. He looked so out of place. Most of the guys were in suits and ties. He looked like he just came from a rodeo. Cowboy hat, boots, bolo, western shirt with pearl snap fasteners and a leather belt with a big gold buckle. Sarah smiled as she wondered whether he had gotten lost and ended up at the wrong party.

Just then, Liz came up behind Sarah and touched her on the shoulder. Sarah jumped in surprise.

"Oh!...Oh it's you, Liz!" Sarah leaned in for a kiss. "Congratulations!" she screamed to be heard above the loud music.

"Thanks!" Liz screamed back. "Are you having a good time?" she asked.

Sarah just held up her glass and a handful of fingers to show how many she'd had at that point.

"Good!" yelled Liz. "Keep them coming!"

"Who's the Hayseed!?" shouted Sarah.

"What?" asked Liz

"The Cowboy. Who is he?" Sarah shouted into her ear while pointing in his direction.

"Oh! That's Garrett!" Liz yelled. "It's Bryan's brother!"

"Brother? They don't look alike at all!" said Sarah.

"I know," responded Liz. "He lives out in Montana. Big Sky Country. He's got a ranch out there. He just came in for the wedding!"

"Did he forget his suit?" Sarah asked with a grin.

"No!" yelled back Liz. "He says that's his formal outfit!" Both ladies giggled. "Do you want me to introduce you?"

"No. No. No," responded Sarah, shaking her head. "I was just wondering."

"Ok! You have a good time! I've got lots more people to greet!" shouted Liz.

Sarah responded by raising her glass. She tipped the glass and finished off the last of the bubbling elixir. She turned to see if she could spot the waiter who was doling out the champagne. Just when she spied the waiter she felt a tap on her shoulder. She swung her head around.

"Want to join me in this hoedown, little lady!?" asked Garrett

Startled, Sarah knocked over her glass. Luckily it was no issue since it was empty. 'What?" was all she managed to say.

"Just askin' if you'd like to cut a rug with me!" he said.

"I don't understand!" she shouted back.

"Do you want to dance!?" yelled Garrett, but just as he had said it, the band stopped playing and he ended up yelling it loud enough for the whole room to hear.

Sarah giggled. She didn't know what to make of this cowboy. "I don't know...why would you want to dance with me?" she asked.

"'Cause you're prettier than a spotted horse in a daisy pasture!" he replied.

Sarah just blushed. How could she say no to that? Besides, she was aching to get out onto the dance floor. 'Well, I guess just one!" she replied.

They took the floor and waited for the next song to start. It was another line dance. "Oh! I don't know this one!" shouted Sarah.

"Don't worry. I'll teach you!" Garrett shouted back. He stood behind Sarah and put his hands on her hips. His face was over her shoulder. She could feel his breath on her ear.

"Left...left...right...spin!" he said into her ear as he deftly led her around the dance floor.

Sarah giggled, as her body was whooshed left and right. He seemed to be able to will her body into whatever direction he chose with his strong grasp.

"One. Two. Step. Step. Slide." She could feel his hands around her stomach as he continued to teach the steps. She let her hands trace down his arms. She could feel his muscles flex as he moved her to and fro.

"That's right! You're gettin' it!" he breathed into her ear. She could feel the goosebumps on her neck.

He let her go when she seemed to be familiar with the steps. He took the spot beside her as they worked through the steps one more time. Sarah couldn't take her eyes off him. Not because she was afraid of messing up the count, but because she hadn't felt this good in quite a while. His colossal smile was intoxicating. She realized she had just as big a smile on her own face.

As the music ended, Garrett grabbed her and spun her into a low arms-length dip before pulling her back upright and into his arms. It all happened before she even realized what was going on. They froze on the dance floor. Sarah's breathing was heavy, but the smile was still there. She looked up at her dance partner.

"Yee-haw!" Garrett yelled.

Sarah couldn't stifle a giggle. "Thanks for the dance," she said.

"How 'bout one more little lady?" he asked her with a big grin.

The band answered for her, launching into fast, dance rock number. Garrett grabbed his partner and whisked her around the floor. When he held her she melted into his arms, following his lead into spins and swings. When they would separate from time to time Sarah noticed that some of the other women dancing by themselves out on the floor would try to cut in. Garrett took one of the ladies for a spin. Sarah felt a quick pang of jealousy. She moved back in when Garrett released the other woman.

The song ended and Garrett finished the dance with another flourish, dipping Sarah low. He pulled her back up. "Hot dang!" he yelled.

"Whew! I need a breather and something to drink!" Sarah exclaimed.

"Sounds good, let me escort you to the watering hole!" replied Garrett.

Sarah smiled. She wondered if he always acted like such a hick or if he was just putting on a show.

Sarah ordered another champagne when they reached the bar. Garrett opted for the house red wine. Sarah gave him a little of a confused look.

"I know, I know," Garrett said as he looked at Sarah's confused face. "Guess you expected me to get a beer or a whiskey. Not me, I guess. I just like what I like."

"Want to get some fresh air?" she asked.

"Love to," Garrett replied. He led her to a balcony. Once the doors closed the band's loud music was muffled enough to let them speak without yelling. They moved to the railing overlooking the river. The peaceful setting was in stark contrast to the melee of the reception.

Garrett made a showing of filling his lungs with air and exhaling. "That's better," he crooned. "Sorry, was gettin' a bit stuffy in there. I do much better in wide open spaces."

Sarah smiled. "I don't know, you were doing pretty well out there on the dance floor!" She took another sip of her champagne.

"I suppose," he replied. "Would be a shame to waste the evening, sittin' on my keaster."

"Thanks for asking me to dance," said Sarah. "I guess I was on my keaster too long!"

Garrett smiled at the use of his words. "How is it that the prettiest filly at the party doesn't have a date?"

Sarah looked down into her glass. His question brought her back to her dispiriting reality. "I'm not the prettiest here," she said, trying to deflect the question.

"I guess you're right," Garrett responded with a big smile.

Sarah looked back up at him with a sideways glance. "What?" she stammered as she tried to decipher his grin.

"I guess I better say that the bride is the prettiest one here," said Garrett. "But you sure are a darned close second!"

"Thanks!" said Sarah as she took in his whole visage. He sure was a 'long drink of water' she thought. "I agree with you, Liz is the pretty one. I should know, we grew up together. My name is Sarah. Liz is my cousin. She told me your name is Garrett and that you're the brother of the groom."

"Yeah, I am at that," replied Garrett. "But I'd like to think that I give him a run for his money in the looks department!"

"That you do, cowboy!" Sarah said as she looked down and blushed. "What about you, where's your cowgirl?"

Garrett laughed out loud. "Well," he said as he raised his glass. "I ain't done hitched my wagon to anyone just yet!" He sipped from his glass. "You still haven't answered my question."

"I'm...uh...I'm...I don't know." Sarah surprised herself with this response. She knew that wasn't a fair description of her current state, but after what happened at her birthday yesterday she felt she wasn't sure about anything.

Garrett just stared at her. He was weighing options in his mind. He decided to just let fate play itself out and let her off the hook. "Well, considering that I don't see a ring on that finger of yours, I'll take it that you'll be partial to saying yes if I ask you to dance again."

Sarah gulped down the rest of her champagne. "Sure thing, pardner!" she let out, trying to lift her own resolve. If nothing else, at least she was going to have fun at Liz's wedding.