All Comments on 'Jessica's in Charge Ch. 01'

Dear Deviant!

I really loved this story, pls continue to follow the history of these girls

Good story, just starting to get hot. We need more of the story.

4 pages, and it is just starting to get hot!

Very hot...a great teasing build up. Very kinky and arousing.

Great story, I can't wait until the next one!

Cannot wait until the next episode...

Fun tale, good build up.

You can rest your head on my big round tits while you write the next chapter!

... But you need to get your editor back. "Yourself" is one word not two. "Each other" is two words not one. This hypnotism will work on men as well as women, will it?

You can't have a part one and not have a part 2! When will your next tale hit Literotica?

damn good story i cant wait till the next installment u should publish it you wold make millions. a true sex-author genius

But with all the praise and awards, surely we should get a part 2? (And maybe 3, and 4…). I want to see Jessica turn every girl on that campus into a hot, pussy-licking, lesbian! And then, on the break, they can go home and seduce their little sisters or other friends or whomever.

(As for the guys, she can make them gay or voyeurs or oblivious or whatever; I really don't care.)

Even if your ambitions aren't as vast as mine, I really would love to see more of this one, please.

This is an awesome story Im really looking forward to the rest of it.

Can I hire you to write my sex scenes? Damn, that was amazing. Normally I'm not into the MC thing, but that was awesome. I came here because of your link off the BB, very smart.

....S-Des

thumbs up!

very nice writing, a bit of a pity that you had the MC stomp so much of the girl's character...

keep on the good work!

Story excellent.

Punctuation awful.

Sex-scenes could be developed a bit more to turn "excellent" into astoundingly good.

I loved it. But on pge 4, you have this line: "The three girl laid down on the floor, Jasmine in the middle and Jasmine and Molly snuggled up to her on either side. " Shouldn't it be Jessica in the middle?

My wife loves it....she loves all of your story and it makes her want to learn to make love to women more than ever

It would have been 100% but I kept getting distracted by the spelling errors. For example, to (as in towards or addressed to) instead of too (as in too much or too little), scarred (as in cut flesh that is forevermore blemished) instead of scared (as in frightened - I see this a lot from the USA writers), tit's (as in belonging to the tit) instead of tits (i.e. plural - more than one tit) [ah, the scourge of the apostophe] and cloths (as in plural of cloth - e.g. dish cloth) when it should be clothes (as in apparel). Spell checker is never as good as a good editor, even if it means your story will take longer to come out as they have so many to read.

The story made me wet. A little slow to start but worth sticking with till the end

GOD DAMN that was hot H-O-T HOT KEEP IT UP 5 STARS All THE WAY

That was pretty damn good. I liked the way you let the tension build, without heading straight for the fucking. There were a couple of spelling errors, but nothing, y'know, major or anything. Keep it up!

Yeah, sure got me hot and wet. Took all of thirty seconds to get me cumming. Gonna cum again now. Great work, thank you.

Amy xxx

OMG, I loved this story - it was great and I love the tension and the sex scenes are great ----- you've got to write MORE STORIES like this one, maybe jessica returns (in the workplace maybe) but promise you'll write more because I love your lesbian, mind-control theme and I need to read more fo this!!!!!!! SO PLEASE WRITE MORE STORIES!!

That was absolutely amazing , more like 20 stars instead of five, keep up the great work

buy

I really loved this story. Not just the Plot, but also the way it was written.

I like the idea of a girl taking over. Definently write more, though maybe not I this series. Sometimes you need to change

Seriously though, you're an amazing writer

Really spoiled by the bad punctuation, random Capital Letters, word confusion and misspellings. An editor is sorely needed to keep your readers from stumbling over the problems instead of getting into the story.

I am not an amazing reviewer, i don't really analyse and whatnot. I will say though that this story is amazing and kepps getting better the more i read. 5 stars!

I rather enjoyed the story. It was sexy, but not overbearingly so. Good write.

I have been fantasizing about tying my wife up & blindfolding her. Then inviting our neighbor's wife, Myra to come in, & fuck her brutally hard with a strap on, till she has multiple orgasms. Then having Myra squat on her face, & forcing her to slurp up all her juices, while i clean up all the juices from my wife's soaking pussy. This story had me rock hard from beginning to end & I can just picture Jessica hypnotising my wife & dominating her, forcing her to become a sexual slave for these young girls. My wife will not know what hit her when we go to bed tonight. Hell, who am I kidding? I'll probably strip her & fuck her on the coffee table as soon as we get home. Now to find me a book on hypnotism for her & Myra

Unfortunately, your terrible grammar detracted from your story.

Thank you for this marvelous story. Too beautiful !

Learn when to use "to" and "too"