All Comments on 'John Smith Inc. Ch. 04'

Good story development and good writing as always. You leave your audience wanting for more story.

If I have a criticism, I would have liked more of Penny's and Elizabeth's respective stories, as those two stories parts seem headed to a confrontation with a major foe that John Smith will eventually have to deal with. With essentially 5 story lines going on in this series, would like two or three times through each thread with several paragraphs devoted to each story part.

Enjoying this series.

I love Elizabeth, can you move her story along. I'm eager to see where this goes.

Love the world and the works, glad to see more of the continuing adventures

The story premise as always is great but you have too many stories going on and are killing the overall storybook.

I love the Airtight Amy section!

Waiting for more!

So much going on

Sometimes it takes five days for stories to post. I'm expecting it to post on Friday.

Kinda bold of you, "fives are appreciated." 'Doddle'? The word you want is dawdle. Really.

If you want a 'five' rating, get an editor or at least use Grammarly. It's free. These weird errors you're making really take away from your writing because they're very distracting. They break the concentration of your readers.

I think that AWT is a much-improved English as a second language Author who no longer using a comprehensive editor for his chapters, ... while he is better, he is not 100% yet, ... however his story, despite the mistakes are still a good read, ... and I hope he is still learning, ... and I want one of those magic Rings, ... ;-) TTFN

I'm out. This has gotten way to repetitious.

“…his huge cock completely within her, past her cervix and nestled in her womb…”

That’s just silly. If you’re going to write about bodies, learn something about them.

The passage into the non-gravid womb is barely wide enough for a human hair. It takes months of hormone action to remodel and enlarge it enough to allow an infant to emerge—and painfully at that. Oh, wait. You could evoke some magical powers to nestle there, but to what purpose?