All Comments on 'Laying Siege Ch. 02'

This could have been good but it just fizzled out. Was she continuing her fling for 6 months? What was she feeling after being found out? Her liver gets a promotion out of it? Maybe just be a bit clearer for those of us who aren't psychologists. 3 stars

There is another chapter, correct ?

Cut her loose. She has already shown so much disrespect and is negotiating and rationalizing her cheating. She can never again be trusted. Chapter is far too short. Just finish it.

The MC needs to have a plan for Jerry after the marriage is dissolved. Something painful.

So she cheated.... Then went away again with him knowing and her knowing he knows. And cheats again?!

Nope not a solid ending. Feels like the author just got bored of the story. She got her rocks off and wanted to present a compromise. Feels weirdly truncated - she goes off and he just... Sits there?

Another story similar to one written within the last year.

Dry, unfeeling and void of emotions. 1*

hope chap 3 starts with the divorce. obviously she no longer respects him.

BTB

Really? He said that? He didn't took any action?

Nope. One and done for a cheating skank slut. Not kicking the whore to the curb after two is completely unacceptable. He's a fool.

Looking forward to a continuation of your story!

Just a suggestion.....(and this would apply to all authors) it would be great to advise readers how many chapters will each story be.

Thanks

There never should have been a second time. He’s still with her and he needs to accept that he’s a cuck

Well, at least you are consistent. This is just as bad as the first installment.

Nothing to like here. Poorly written, no character development, story is weak as hell. Bill is written as a complete pussy.

Stop publishing your notes and write a story.

Kind a left me feeling empty. Just not sure where this is going or what will be the final chapter

3***

"If we work hard on our problem, perhaps with counseling, I might tolerate the two unfaithful conventions."

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It's unclear what the two are. Is the time when they kissed one of those, or was she unfaithful on the most recent one she returned from even after she kmew her husband kmew she'd been unfaithful?

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The moment Jerry grabbed her breast, yes it is sexual harassment whether she was his boss or not. If you don't thunk so, grab your boss's tit and watch how fast you get bounced out the door for cause. If she was portrayed as naive, perhaps she might truly believe that, but she's a VP.

Why does this begin with essentially a repeat of the first part?

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So he know she cheated and isn't taking any action?

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And how can she secure a position for Jerry?

Too much of a repetition of the previous story. Bundle it up and make one installment.

I am assuming a part 3 is coming. However, I would just like to respectfully offer feedback that the story seems rather dry and emotionless. I think it could stand more “in the moment” dialog and emotionally-charged behavior and action rather than merely reporting the events after they occurred. Plus, the conversations between husband and wife should be presented with far more emotion given the nature of what is happening to this marriage. Just sayin’.

Spent the first half of this short chapter re-typing the previous chapter with little forward movement.

Was there a point to this diatribe??

This is a nice skeleton of a story, but there's so little detail that it's easy to dismiss.

Anyhoo, the cunt is gonna keep fucking Jerry at every convenrion for the next 6 months?

Firsr of all, Bill should have personally intervened with Jerry, or at least made an anomymous call to HR regarding their behavior. But at this point, Tammy's ass needs kicked to the curb. That entitled cunt will be free to fuck whoever she wants.

This isn't a story. I've seen more emotion and feeling in a road sign. You write this shred of a tale describing story elements that should be written as full scenes. This has "mailed it in" all over it.

The story deserved a lot more fleshing out, plus the first 60% of this story was just a repeat of what had happened in Part 1.

He should ha e just smiled at her a d asked her to say hi to the kids the next time she sees them. Then gi e the. His new cell num er as he says so long slut!

Emotionless story - marriage as a project ? But there are few such people - no jelous, no hate. Question what Bill can offer her to forget about lover - better project ???

Burn the cheating bitch, and then go find Jerry.

Why even give her the option? She expects him to be accepting for 6 more months until this dipshit promotion happens? No thank you, goodbye and goodnight lady.

Just stop! This is an annoying way to tell a story. We got the Cliff Notes version which also included the first installment. You could have just submitted this one to begin with. And HR would have had a grand time tossing the cobber for squeezing his supervisor's tit.

And at what point does the money become so important that a supervisor like Tammy feels she needs to continue a project with one specific person? If it is a matter of Jerry's expertise that understandable. But tammy's the supervisor! She can assign another person to the team to act as a barrier or obstacle to Jerry's advances. Make it clear they are to be in the room at all times.

And the deal where Jerry gets a promotion for his bad behavior is reprehensible. Award the guy for being a predator, that's rich! And Bill just happily plays along like a faithful Labrador being taken to the vet for a neutering, or worse, euthanasia! Hell no! If Bill has even a ounce of the cajones that this writer semi-alludes to, then Bill is due some cans of USDA Prime WhupAss to open up and cram down Jerry's throat!

Just another cheating-cucking tale filled with distracting psychobabbles. With 3.2* for the 2 parts, it's a mere 55% of the rating range. No chance to get better users feedback with these kind of tales, in this LW category.

1st chapter was good. This 2nd chapter, was a rehash of the first, just another cheating wife story with no emotion. Sorry this chapter dropped to 2⭐️

Numerous comments have made the same point, and it's valid: if 60% of Ch 3 is also going to be a rehash, why not post more economically?

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I wonder if you're not posting in real time. After next month's convention/continuance of the affair, will you be posting again to let us know the status of your divorce?

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Obviously this story does not express a lot of feelings, but I'm thinking our MC is socially awkward at best. That's why our dear Tammy thinks she is entitled to a brief foray into the world of passion before she can willingly return to the world where love is a decision to devotion but not a source of passion, lust, touch, word or feelings.

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I can see why a beautiful, successful socially involved wife with a socially inept husband would think that she has a certain amount of license before he would consider ditching her, especially if she has never had occasion to stray before. Not saying she's right--we'll have to wait a few more conventions to find out.

In particular, some of the pacing was clever.

The plot would probably proceed via a divorce, in my estimation... but that is just me. After the divorce? That would depend on the level of cleverness of the author.

Green-something

It wanders a bit, wasting page to rehashing early parts. Okay short read.

Conventions can be dangerous for the wrong person!

4

I liked it. Shrug.

Just a load of nothing.

Hang on…. Half of this one was the first one, your writing style isn’t to my liking, the plot, simple but so far you haven’t made it work.

Haha. He confronts her. She is shocked but leaves anyways, screws Jerry again (presumably) at thos conference and comes back with a six month of f$cking Jerry proposal. And first half or more was a rehash of Chapter 1. Lol.

This chapter had little new content and that was hurried. And, no eroticism whatsoever,

2 stars from Xluckylee