Leah is not leaving

I was never an easy kid, but in my defense - my home was never an easy home. Orphaned at birth, I was taken in by the only remaining family Ma had - her sister-in-law, Kaitlin. Kaitlin was not a particularly great fit for a mother, but she sure was an open-hearted woman. A people's person, her doors were alway open to her numerous 'friends', drinking buddies and other misfits.

Having grown up obsessed with Hollywood and film I loathed my plain, half-deserted hometown. It didn't help that Kaitlin's reputation stuck me like a unwanted shadow. I could not wait to escape both - on my 18th birthday.

A month to the circled date all my plans came crashing down. Kaitlin was arrested in a sudden midnight raid. Four months later she was found guilty and sent away on drug charges.

In those 4 months I watched my life fall apart before me. I lost my part time job, my savings for the trip, and even my simple-minded but well-built boyfriend with whom I've been basically living for the past year in an effort to avoid my aunt's party lifestyle.

Whatever she was, Kaitlin was the only person I could call family in this entire world. With her and everything else gone in a flash, I was crushed.

At least I still had the house, I thought to myself as I stood on the porch of my ex-love with my scarce belongings in an overstuffed backpack. I went back -- only to find out it wasn't my home anymore. It belonged to some Rob now, Kaitlin's latest boyfriend, or according to him - fiance. I've seen him around the house a few times before and he was there for some of the trial stuff, but he acted removed, like an observer. It never even occurred to me they were involved, and Kaitlin never mentioned anything either.

I didn't believe his claims until I saw the deed on the house with my own eyes, but there it was, printed in crisp black - "Robert White". In the few times I visited her since that day Kaitlin refused to discuss how the hell that happened. All she said was that Rob was her "man" and that I were to show him some respect.

Rob insisted the house transfer was done for some tax loophole I wouldn't understand, and that it didn't matter what the paperwork said anyway. They were planning to spend the rest of their life together, as a family. He will wait for her release right there in their home.

Being part of said family, I was graciously allowed to stay there as well despite how generally ungrateful I've been for everything Kaitlin has done for me, according to Rob. Allowed. In my own home. I was furious but It's not like I had too many options to choose from, so I settled in, cautiously defiant and openly cold. I'd decided he and this house could both burn in hell for all I cared. I was not going to stay long.

Rob was quiet, away at work a lot, and all-in-all, not terribly creepy. I avoided him for the most part, but even so, sometimes I was grateful not to be the only soul in the large, run-down house.

I found some gigs here and there -- cleaning, delivery, waitressing -- but a stable, decent-paying job opening for someone like me was a rare sight in our parts. When Rob said a buddy of his was willing to hire me for some extra help at his repair shop I felt nothing but grateful. It felt good to have someone looking out for you.

Johnny, my new boss, was a large, boastful man. He seemed overly attached to the idea of being the "cool boss", which in his mind, I guess, meant lots of questionable jokes and not a lot of managing. But, the pay was more than I'd hoped for, the work was easy and the hours - flexible. So there I was, smiling politely at his skeezy one-liners while googling my own job description.

Truth be told, I wasn't sure what my job description was. I kept the place clean, answered calls, kept their books, but there was simply enough work at the shop for a full-time employee. I felt out of place and was glad when eventually Johhny thought of a large job for me - I was to sort through the stuffed storage room they had: inventorize, organize, digitize. This kept me busy for some time and gave me an excuse to shift most of my work to late evenings, without Johnny and the other guys there.

---

The nights at the dimly lit shop may have felt peaceful, but peaceful is not the same as safe. The faint screeching of the back door sent me into panic. I always lock up -- did I forget??...

Something metal loudly clanked to the floor at the other end of the shed.

"... you sitting here all in the dark... fuck... GODDAMN IT!" To my great relief I recognized the voice as Johnny's. Another large metal part flew to the side, kicked off by his clumsy foot.

"You told me to save the electricity, remember?"

""I think its you that forgets.. what's what..." he slurred, his wobbly shadow finally approaching my end of the room. "How about you remember some goddamn respect for once?"

Beer was not frowned upon at the shop and it often brought out a harsher side of Johnny. But I don't think I'd ever seen him quite this inebriated.

"Sorry," I said dryly. "I'll go get the big light."

"Oooh, well why bother now princess - I made it didn't I?" He stood up proudly in front of my desk, hands at the hips, his shadow inflated by the light from my desk.

"What are you up to here, huh?"

"Nothing, just working. How was your night, Johnny?"

He plopped down onto a chair next to me, dousing me in his whiskey-spiced breath.

"Well don't let me bother you then, miss working lady. Always so serious..."

A bit thrown by a grown man pouting like a child, I slowly turned back to my computer screen. He sat watching me, elbows resting on his knees, belching occasionally.

"Working... she thinks she is working... The REAL work is done during the day, with these two hands!" he shook one of them near my face.

"What's all this paper pushing you're doing here? Yeah, you go do that in your precious New York or whatever... " He was mumbling to himself, more bitter than angry. "Around here we actually get something done, you know!"

I turned my head to him slightly, avoiding a direct encounter with his glassy stare.

"You know, I was just about to close up..."

Ignoring my words, his chair moved closer with a screech.

"Equality this, equality that..." As if picking up an argument we left off. "The only thing not equal is that we're out there always busting our asses for you." he said, the loathing palpable in his voice. "Y'all think everything is just supposed to be given to you."

"I work for my money, thank you very much," I dropped, glancing at my phone trapped under his elbow.

"Ha! She works!"

"Yeah, I do, Johnny. For you, actually. Can I get my phone please?" I reached over, "Talk to me tomorrow - when you sober up - okay?"

His fist loudly dropped on my desk, startling me upright.

"You better watch your mouth...." he seethed, blood veins on his face filling. "Calling me a drunk... If you think I'm gonna sit here and take your shit - in MY shop, on MY dime?? Yeah... You may be Robbie's favorite charity case - but you ain't gonna be mine, you hear me?"

I froze. I didn't care what he was on about, but I misjudged just how far gone he was right then and that scared me. I had to find a way to slip out without poking the beast any further.

"Johnny, I'm real sorry, I wasn't giving you shit. I'm just gonna go for tonight and I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Don't bother coming tomorrow - I'm done with charity."

"Uhm.. ok..." I reached for the phone again, still under his arm but he just moved his torso further, blocking me off.

"You hear me??. I don't need this."

"Okay, I hear you Johnny. Look, I'm sorry, won't happen again, okay?"

My usual pacifying tactics did nothing on this drunk - the tension in his face remained.

"It sure won't. Cause there ain't no job for you here - never was. All this," he nodded in the direction of the boxes stacked behind me, "This is aaall just to help out my buddy. And his brand-new step-daughter."

He looked pleased, watching me as the meaning of his words slowly sunk in. There I was, worried he will cut my hours once he figures out how little I actually do, and how little there was to do. But it never made much sense to me, why would he hire someone in the first place? Until now.

"So, uhm, why did you hire me then?"

"Because Johnny," he patted himself on the chest with sincerity, "has a good heart."

"You didn't have to... I didn't know..." I mumbled, taken aback by this new revelation.

"Robbie swore you're a smart girl, you're gonna earn your pay - wanna tell me when you're gonna start? What am I paying you for?" Shaking his hand in frustration at the papers on my desk he added, "This crap??"

"Okay, well then... Thank you Johnny, that was really nice of you to help out. I'm sorry for any trouble."

"Trouble..." His heavy hand landed on my knee just as I was getting up, "I'm so sick of all you ungrateful bitches."

I baulked in shock. He leaned in.

"And what do I get, huh?! More thank-you-johnny's?? What am I supposed to do with that?"

His look was soaked in resentment, hands gripped into my muscle - I held my breath, glaring back at him. We held still, suddenly cooled by the heavy silence that followed his thunderous outburst.

"Fuck..."

He looked down, relaxing his shoulders, as if in remorse. Still, his hand stayed right where it was, pressing me down.

"You don't understand... You know me - everything I do -- it's never for me, it's all for others. I'm just that kind of a guy. It's just... "

He seemed less terrifying and more pathetic now. I tried lifting up or shifting away from him, again and again. His face showed no sign of the force exerted to press me back down as he went on and on about his plight.

"I've got not one - TWO women living off my back now. So, tell me, would ya? How come I'm taking care of all y'all, and the only one ever taking care of Johnny - is Johnny? Huh? That seem fair to you??!"

His other hand gripped my wrist, as rough as his tone. His momentary hesitation was gone, and with it - my best hope. The back of my chair wouldn't let me move any further from his face, now nearly touching mine. The more I tried to move the more painful his grip on me tightened.

"I'm so sick of it... Enough is enough... How about you make yourself useful," he whispered, pressing my hand to his crotch. "For... Fucking... Once..."

"Stop it!!" I yelped, struggling to pull my arm away. "Stop! Get off me!!"

"C'mon baby, what's it gonna cost you? Not as much as you're costing me, I bet..."

"Get OFF me, you freak!!" I screeched.

He let go of his grip - only to land his heavy hand hard across my cheek.

"Aaah! What the f..." tears burst out of me, "You asshole..."

He gripped my chin.

"That's enough. That's enough..."

I sobbed.

"Calm down... Come now, come here. Just touch it... "

He grabbed me, pulling me back with him into his chair. Settled on one of his knees, he pressed my face into his shoulder, maneuvering my hand around his crotch. He groaned, I cried out in disgust. I couldn't believe this was happening.

"Oh don't you go all Mother Mary on me now," he chuckled into my ear. "As if I don't know who raised you...

Oh yeah - I know Kaitlin reea-al well. She's got her talents, that's for sure," he smiled at some wistful memory I didn't want to imagine. "You're all grown now, c'mon girl. Let's see how you are."

My muscles filled with rage. I pushed away one more time with every muscle in my body.

"Go see your wife's talents, assh..." I seethed, but the rest of my outrage got slapped out of my mouth again. The heat his palm left on my cheek spread, and I couldn't tell if I was burning with rage or shame or whether it was pain all-together. My movements dampened.

"Don't be so difficult.... You wanted a job? I've got a job for you right here."

If the ease with which he handled my resistance wasn't convincing enough, the stings his arms left all around my body were. Exhausted by my own crying, I grew quieter. There was no calling for help. We both knew there was no one around us for miles at this hour.

"There you go, that's better."

By the time he finally let go of my wrist I had no clue what to do with this small freedom - there was no point in trying to push him away. Fighting him only brought more force upon me. I kept my eyes shut. His belt buckle clanked, then the zipper. The strange sensory input flooded my mind - warm, clammy, semi-hard. It felt so wrong.

"Stop!! I don't want to do this..." I opened my eyes to plead with him.

"I'm so sick of this..." he grabbed my head by the hair, "I just want a thank you, Leah, just once. Please."

"I'm really grateful, I swear, just... anything else."

"I don't need anything else from you."

His grip on my hair tightened, ready for defiance. But there was none. He wasn't letting me walk away now, that much I knew. What I didn't know is how much worse this could get. He was barely in control of himself.

He pressed my head back into his shoulder.

"Just touch me."

My hand moved forward on its own, my fingers cautiously wrapping around his cock.

"Just like that."

My eyes closed for a moment. He pulled my hand up to his face and spat in it.

"Yeah, baby... Now that's what I'm talking about... Nice and slow...," he breathed into my ear. My hand obediently slid up and down along his growing length.

The harder he grew, the tighter his grip on me got, pressing me into himself. One hand slipped under my shirt, cupping my breasts, squeezing. His wet lips moved along my neck. I closed my eyes, breathing through the mouth to avoid his overwhelming aroma - a result of cheap liquor and his apparent aversion to showers.

He pulled my shirt up and wrapped his lips over my exposed nipple. His fingers dug into my skin as he feasted on my breasts, growing hungrier with each moment.

My eyes tightly shut until now, I was startled by a large finger unceremoniously prying my mouth open. His unfocused gaze slid over my rounded eyes down to my mouth, watching me struggle against his fingers. He removed them and lowered for a kiss, replacing his fingers with his prying tongue.

"Fuck... C'mon, sweet thing. Come make Johnny happy. Get down here."

My body felt weightless in his hands and before I could know it iI was on the floor, his heavy thighs spread apart before me.

"C'mon Johnny... please..." Tears welled up my eyes again.

"Shhhh. Get in here."

My lips were powerless, trapped between his hand on my head and his cock. The stench of his crotch made me want to gag but he pressed in, turning my pleading into stuffed moans, and before long, into gurgling noises.

"Yeessss, fu-uuck..."

I wasn't a stranger to sucking cock, but there was no sucking happening here. Johnny was more interested in my throat. The tight barrier taunted him and determined to push through he held my head with both hands, ramming in rhythmic, drawn-out, bursts,

All I could do was fight back my body's urge to reject the intruder. The spasms in my stomach threatened to make my situation even more humiliating than it already was. I held on to this small piece of dignity with all I had.

My tears and gagging did not bother Johnny. He closed his eyes and rolled back his head, feeling his way through. The alcohol in him continued to work against me - it took him a long while to build up. Or at least it felt that way to me. When the sensation wasn't enough he'd look down, whispering "Look at me, look at me." Doing so breathed life into him every time, but no matter how much I strained myself his cock jamming into my throat pulled my gaze down as if by a string. I wondered if he was crazy, expecting me to do one physically impossible thing after another. I wondered if a throat can break or rip apart, and how long could this possibly go on for.

I was exhausted and nearly loosing my mind at this insane race my mouth was a part of, when his pace suddenly increased and I felt his cock filling up, hardening. It was impossible to breathe but I only opened wider. All I wished was for this to end. Some part of me stopped caring what that ending would look like, as long as there's no more of this.

Not reaching the peak he wished for, he pulled out sharply, pulling out a thick string of saliva directly from my throat. Stroking himself with one hand and holding my head in the other, he pushed my nose into his ballsack. I didn't need to be encouraged, I was desperate for this to be over, and I channeled that desperation into finally teasing the orgasm out of his organs.

"RHAAAHH yess yes yes... Aaagggh..."

I felt a thick spurt landing on my hair. In a flash, his cock was back in my mouth, choking me on the rest of his seed. My eyes widened, drowning. I coughed without his cock leaving my mouth, sending the hot liquid back along his shaft and down my chin. He remained still until he felt completely empty. Only then, with a deep sigh he pulled my head off him.

"FUCKk yess.. Oh honey, I needed that."

Unrecognizably pacified, he held up my chin, scanning my face and hair with brief satisfaction. Then his eyes moved on, loosing the last bit of interest. He squeezed my cheeks playfully and let go.

"Well done... See now, that's the kind of assisting I could use around here. Not all this nonsense," he nodded at the desk covered with folders and files.

With that he rose up to his feet, quickly pulling his jeans back up. I sat back on my ankles, eyes locked on a random wet spot on the floor, still even after the heavy back entrance door clicked shut.