by ncsoccermom35
I really like your stories (and hopefully you won't get as many Anonymous jerks as you do in Loving Wives). Keep writing.
Good story overall. A few parts, like the transition from the club to Gary's house, could use a rewrite for clarity, but your characters are consistent, your plot is believable, and the majority of your narration flows very well.
Please write more.
Really liked how dirty your story was. I could actually picture them fucking. I also loved that he came in her. I would have liked you to be more explicit about the nasty things he was saying to her. Also, Gary's actual age would have been nice to know. I think it adds to the idea of a kind of dirty old guy with a hot young girl.
good little story with the smack or reality. I like what you write, and please write more.
Great story! Total abandonment of inhibitions is so sexy. More please!
I like how you describe her inner slut taking over, and the physicality of getting fucked from behind.