Life, Love, and a Career Ch. 07

Derrick smiled and whispered in her ear, "Beth, you must know I am blessed to have you in my life, you are amazing and saved me. I love you and would be honored to be the father of your child."

He stood and wiped the tears that were forming in his eyes.

"Derrick, you are our knight. We love you more than you know, kind sir."

I kissed his cheek, hugging him tightly until my arms ached. When I released him, I asked him to come downstairs and sit with Frances and I for a few moments. We wanted to talk with him. Once down the steps and were met by Frances in the hallway. She grabbed Derrick's hand walking him into the family room. Dan and Chelle had muted the television as we all took a seat, Frances spoke up.

Frances started, "Derrick, I need a favor, we'll actually poor Kate needs a favor. She hasn't slept in a few nights and I was wondering if I could convince you to stay the night and maybe the next few nights helping me with Beth. You know" Frances shrugged, "If she would need anything. This way Kate might get a little rest. Would you help me please?"

"Certainly ma'am I would be more than happy to help you and Kate."

"Good," Frances replied. "You can switch off with me. Chelle's room is next door to Beth and Kate's. There you can sleep in between shifts for the weekend or longer."

Frances turned and winked at me.

"Derrick" Chelle chimed in, "If you want, I can make space in the dressers and closet. Just let me know, we are getting a place soon anyway." She looked at me and smiled.

It was settled; Frances took the remote and turned the volume back up on the television. We sat on the couch, comfortably but always listening for Miss. That night I fell asleep in the chair listening to Miss breath. I woke a few hours later noticing I was covered by a throw blanket.

December '89

Unless you have been through it yourself it is difficult to explain the pain and heartache associated with learning of the death of a loved one.

Words can never describe it nor prepare you for it. To me this experience hardened me to the core and broke me like no other experience. Potentially this is where most of my burdens, dreams and fears rest. After all, he was my father, my idol, my music mentor.

When my father passed, I will never forget how rock solid my mother was. Ohh don't get me wrong, she cried and faltered some but her faith, her love and devotion to Chelle and I was solid. I never heard her ask 'why' or 'why us' or 'why him'.

She moved forward with her life as our foundation, strong hold and mother and when needed father.

I still remember, I wasn't feeling well and went to bed after school on that early December evening. It was around 6:45 that I heard screams downstairs. I ran from my bedroom down the stairs seeing Mom and Chelle crying and hugging each other.

It was out of my peripheral vision that I saw the two Pennsylvania State Police Troopers. I knew something was seriously wrong when Mom turned and saw me. There was sadness in her eyes as she opened her arms wanting me to come to her for a hug. The next ten days were a blur, a constant flurry of activities I will never forget nor will I want to relive.

It's been ten years, and I will still never forget that night.

***

Kate woke me letting me know it was time for the ice treatment for my back. It was twenty minutes of my morning that I just didn't want to deal with.

"Kate, I have something else I would rather do with the next twenty minutes."

She shook her head no. "Miss you know better, not until your flexibility has returned without pain."

There was a quick knock at the door, Derrick was handing Kate the two ice bags. The door closed and we were left alone.

I rolled over allowing Kate to place a towel on my back with the ice bags. She set a timer and walked out of the bedroom. Twenty minutes later the timer rang. Kate walked back in with a fresh towel. She removed the ice bags, dropped them into the basin on the floor and placed the fresh towel on my back. Moments later she returned sitting on the bed and removed the towel starting a very gentle massage.

She dropped her hand onto my bum whispering to me all the things she wanted to do with me once I was cleared by my physical therapist. I was instantly wet having incredible urges for Kate but she wasn't allowing anything.

I wasn't yet allowed, still recovering, which I begrudgingly accepted moving forward with the treatment. I wanted to curse her but I was well aware of what I was and wasn't allowed to do.

Then another set of soft knocks, two taps, on the door. It was our signal that Derrick was done in the bathroom. Kate slowly moved off the bed standing next to it as I moved one leg then the other rotating up into a sitting position. Then with outstretched hands she assisted me in standing.

We shared a gentle kiss as I was handed my clean bra and panties and left for my shower. Lather, rinse and repeat, just like my shampoo bottle.

***

Kate walked over to my cubicle and whispered, "Miss, its 5:15. Frances wanted us home at 6:00 for dinner."

I nodded, closed up my pad folio, locked and put my desktop to sleep, gathered my personal belongings and handed my bag to Kate. I swiveled in the chair taking her outstretched hand and Derrick's as well, straightening my back and stood slowly.

"Look mom! I can stand!" I joked and winked at both of them. "Now may I carry my bag and have the car keys?"

In a stern but respectful tone of voice, Derrick responded, "No you may not, now stop asking."

We walked out of the building and to the car, Kate opened that passenger door for me and assisted with my entrance, closing the door, she got in the back seat as Derrick started the car, driving us home.

As we approached the house, I noticed that Chelle's car was in the driveway and another on the street in front of the house.

"Kate, is there a special dinner tonight that I have forgotten?" I inquired.

"Not that I am aware of but it will be nice to see Chelle? Don't you agree?"

"Of course it is always nice to see my sister."

We parked in the drive and slowly and carefully walked to the house and to the front door. As typical, Kate and Derrick went upstairs first and I made my way to the kitchen and family room to greet Mom. As I entered the kitchen, I saw a man in a suit and tie sitting with Mom, Chelle and Dan; I was startled.

I froze. "Mom, what is this?"

"Beth dear" Mom looked at me and paused, "Please have a seat. Kate can join us as she is your fiancée when she comes down. This is Andrew; he is an attorney and a representative from the cola company."

Mom continued, "I am comfortable with Derrick joining us if Andrew feels there aren't any legal issues but that is up to Derrick."

I backtracked walking to the foot of the steps. "Kate" my voice cracked. "Babe I need you and Derrick, please it's important." I felt weak in my knees. "Kate!" I screamed.

My back started cramping up. I felt the stress and a massive twinge of pain. My head started spinning. I heard them all coming at once in both directions. I just started crying.

I didn't pass out. I just blacked out for a second or two. Its stress that is all this is. I am certain of it. I can handle the stress of the office but not in my personal life. Mom and I talked about this recently. I now needed to come clean with Kate, and maybe Derrick later but not today.

The three of us made our way into the kitchen when I spoke, "Of course I need Kate and yes, I want Derrick to join us. Mom, not here, maybe the living room?." The cola guy just nodded and started talking.

A few moments later we were sitting in the living room. I was sitting in the hardback chair trying to maintain my posture.

I just listen in shock the whole time. Derrick was taking notes, Kate was holding my hands. A few times during the conversation I looked at Chelle. Her reaction was similar to mine but we sat there just dazed as details were troubling, scary but thorough.

The man in the suit, Andrew, explained that the company employee and driver of the vehicle that night was intoxicated and was drinking on the job. He explained that ten years ago there was a settlement, which mom agreed to. It included financial damages to the living family members on the ten-year anniversary of "Mr. Doherty's" death. The monies had been set aside in a trust growing interest as part of the agreement my mother made with the company.

As soon as I heard 'Mr. Doherty' I screamed out and started crying asking for a moment.

"Kate, I need to stand, I need fresh air, Derrick, please."

Helping me up, I just walked to the front door. Forgoing a jacket I didn't care I just needed a second to clear my head.

"I can't take this stress. I can handle all the work stress in the world but I am sorry I just miss my Father. I needed him so many times. My poor mother!" I just balled a little as both Kate and Derrick hugged me.

"I am so sorry for doing this to you both. It just isn't fair to you. I swear I will make it up to you one day. I just can't handle this personal stress. I need a win, something of happiness."

"Do not, let me stress, do not misunderstand me. I love you both, Kate, I love you to the moon and back. Derrick I know we have discussed starting our family soon but with my back I am not allowed. Guys I need something positive in my personal life. I feel like I can't ever win!"

"Fuck!" I screamed.

Then the voice of reasoning chimed in my ear, "Miss let's get you inside, I don't want you getting sick and that man is waiting on you. We must trust your mother. Please love?"

We returned back to the living room. Derrick actually spoke up apologizing on my behalf saying I needed a quiet little cry. Everyone understood.

We sat down, and he continued. For the next fifteen minutes Andrew spoke mostly in legal jargon but very specific in terms. I only heard part of it as my mind wandered, daydreaming about my dad. Thankfully Derrick was taking notes.

"Beth" I heard my name bringing me back to the conversation. "Beth, do you have any questions?" The man asked.

"Um, sorry I lost concentration for a moment. But I am sure if Chelle or I do there will be a means to have them answered."

"Beth and Chelle," my mother said. "This is why I would not discuss and will never accept rent or monies from you. The settlement has cared for us wonderfully for the past ten years and will continue to do so well into the future. Now it will start caring for your futures; Chelle, Beth and your spouses and families."

Then it hit me, I smiled and started crying again but this time, tears of joy. I tried to stand; they assisted me. Once on my feet, I knelt down then turned to Kate.

"Baby, New York and California recently defined same-sex couples as families."

I grabbed her hand and then looked over at Derrick and took his hand, joining the three of our hands together. I looked at them both, back and forth, "We are a family, we are a little weird but Kate and Derrick you are my support, my love and my family outside of Mom and Chelle."

"Derrick, I love you a little more every day. I know Kate does. " I turned, seeing her smile and nod.

"Please understand the love I have for Kate is greater than the depths of the ocean. I will marry her." I paused and looked at Kate.

"Kate, Two years ago there were 2,000 gay marriages on The Mall in Washington DC. We are going to get married, soon I promise, we will get married."

I paused and looked at my Mom, "Are you certain that you are okay with Kate and I getting married?" I didn't wait for an answer. "Mom, would dad approve?"

She smiled nodding her head and started crying, sharing tears of joy.

I turned back to Kate, "I will spend all the money I have and don't have to marry you. If that is what it takes. I will spend every dime I have."

Kate stood and helped me back to my feet. We just hugged. In the background I heard the noise of people moving but didn't care. This was a moment meant for Kate.

"Miss." she broke the hug, "It's time we must go upstairs; your back Miss."

I just cried as Kate and Derrick walked me up the stairs as had been for the past weeks, Kate held me by the waist, Derrick in front holding my hands while he walked backwards. We climbed the steps going into our bedroom.

I paused at the door, "Kate." I kissed her then whispered in her ear.

She smiled and nodded her head with tears of joy in her eyes. "Yes, please Miss, yes, please."

"Derrick, once you are ready for bed, please come join us in our room. We want to spend some time together, nothing more but we want your comfort in our bed."

We parted ways while each of us got changed and I prepared for the ice treatment. A few moments later there was a knock at our bedroom door. Kate opened the door and welcomed Derrick.

Twenty minutes later I lay in the center of the bed. Kate was in her spot laying on my left. Derrick on my right while Kate's hand holding Derrick's and mine on top as they both lay on my stomach. We just lay there breathing and relaxing. I was the first to fall asleep as I listened to some of my favorite instrumental melodies.

Partway through the night I felt the bed shift. I knew right away it was Derrick leaving. When the door closed, I pulled Kate closer to me wanting to feel her next to me.